Comments on: Self criticism causes depression

By: suzy

suzy — Sun, 13 May 2012 08:46:58 +0000

i am 59. it has taken me over 40 years to realize what has been happening with me.
consistently criticized as a child.always unhappy.but learnt how to put on a mask.as it appeared no one cared anyway.as a teenager heavily into drugs and drink.no more drugs, but always a binge drinker.overeat too. which is another merry go round i am on.high as a kite when i am on a diet, then i fail and beat myself up.cry when i try clothes on, do not want to go out.shut myself away. but have to go out to work etc. so mask goes on again, even though i am feeling so depressed.emotions dead, but can cry about anything…..the list goes on.finding this site has made me feel hopeful,am seriously thinking about doing the therapy online.i know i can go to gp, but will have to wait ages for the cognitive therapy through them……….

By: WasterSpace

WasterSpace — Thu, 01 Mar 2012 20:31:48 +0000

While I agree with some of Sean’s comments, I personally feel the original article is still valid. I suffer badly from this myself, and certain parts really chimed with me. There can be many contributing factors, but all the same it’s a real kicker for some people. I cannot count the amount of times the reflex has kicked without me even realising it. I seem to recall a Councillor speaking of “The F**k-It-Button”… the unconscious pick-up-trip-up.

“Shit! I fucked up bigtime”… Take a drink
“I forgot to do “… Take a drink
“Well, I fucked up number one, didn’t achieve number two, I’m a useless waste of f****ng space, why the hell NOT take a drink!!!”.

By: Jody

Jody — Thu, 04 Aug 2011 02:09:03 +0000

This is way better than a brick & mortar establishment.

By: Sean

Sean — Mon, 20 Sep 2010 01:50:20 +0000

“Self criticism causes depression” I am not to shore about this one. I think we all Criticize our selves at some point. No matter if your an alcoholic or a Tea Drinker. All so most people that “Self criticize are in fact really very good at wat ever it is that they “Self criticize them selves over and lets just take drink out of the way for a moment i am not talking about drink. Thats a hole different ball game. Most people that “Self criticize there selves do not do so on there own they do not sit at home and get there selves in to a dizzy no they do it in front of people all most to get reassurance that they are good at wat they do. In fact you could say they are low in confidence that would be a better word and probably more in line with wat they say or how they feel. Also if they are around people that criticize them they will begin to question there own ability’s and slowly loose confidence in wat they can and cant do or think they cant do. And then yes that can lead to Depression and alot of the times does but you have clinical depression and normal every day depression and then a little bit in between that i do not have a name for but i have had it. If you are a drinker you will get it at some point. You have to because i am afraid that’s wat booze does to you and if it is not at the moment well it will rest assured it will. Normal Depression that most people get is easy to treat with no meds. Clinical depression is a little harder but treatable all the same. In fact all 3 are linked drink depression criticism. Most alcoholics criticize people most alcoholics get depression and then there is Alcohol most alcoholics drink it.

By: pd7707

pd7707 — Tue, 18 May 2010 01:28:58 +0000

hi,
i got my last drink on 17/03/10.exactly 2 months ago.The same date i was admitted to residential detox.It was my second detox.My first detox was in january, i left the clinic on 6/1/10 and got my drink next day.straight after that drink i went exactly where i was before the detox. I used to drink vodka, 3-4 quaters daily. I wouldn`t buy a standard bottle because couldn`t hide it.I didn`t need drink mixer,glass, anything..i drank straight from the bottle.at once.then discard the emply bottle before i get indoors.the second quater i would drink indoors, hidden in the toilet so my friend wouldn`t see it.then will black out, wake up, top up and again and again.it never finished.during my first detox i didn`t like the word Relapse. I just wasn`t ready. Staying sober for life time wasn`t my thing.I needed a drink in my life,all the time or i didn`t know how to live it.
2 months ago i got my last drink the morning before i was admitted in detox.And this time i really wanted to believe it would be last one.I was never so scared, alcohol controlled me completely and wanted free.
After many years struggling with the addiction i was informed about all consequences,dangers, triggers, everything related to my addiction. it was a reliefe to know that the physical craving actually lasts about 3 mins only. After that it`s the thought of it. The real danger and cause of my relapse was the psychological craving. I used to have terrible fits in my previous withdraws. nothing happened that time.
So far i didn`t experience any cravings, not physical at least, but the thought of drink never left me. In my case it has positive effect as i am afraid to death from the possible consequences if i picked up a drink. I wanna live. this is what keeps me away from the alcohol so far.But every single minute i am aware that there is always danger, challenge to not resist at the temptation.i have to work on this every day, i will never ne cured. my only chance is to resist that first drink.
So i agree that there is no universal cure. It`s all in our heads.
Medical environment is absolute asset during the first weeks, but then it`s up to us to do the real work and keep sober.
I am not proud to say that i don`t attend all recommended after care group, i have to work to support my self and can`t afford frequent absence from my duty.One thing i know for sure , i can`t say how long i am gonna be sober, but i do appreciate every single moment during my sober 2 months.I would never do it alone.
thanks to many people, my gp, my key worker, the medical worker in detox centre, to the peers there.
just keep on trying.it`s never too late and never too early to quit drinking.we don`t need to hit the rock bottom.
pd

By: Marco

Marco — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 01:54:55 +0000

Hi Paul

Whilst I really commend you for quitting and wish you all the best going forward I really have to say that you were not really an alcoholic. I mean 32 pints a week? That is 4 or 5 pints a day, not saying its ok mind you but that is not over board. Quitting from such amounts is easy. My friend I consume a bottle of vodka a day, yes a DAY, not proud of it, but this is a serious problem…. Anyway I guess we measure things according to our own standards therefore I hope I will achieve what Paul did soon!

By: Luigi Fulk

Luigi Fulk — Tue, 16 Feb 2010 20:57:45 +0000

Awesome topic like the great motivational speakers like Les Brown

By: diane

diane — Tue, 16 Feb 2010 14:50:12 +0000

paul i have just read your reply with interst. I have made up my mind on numerous occaisions to stop drinking. i admire you, it sounds so easy. but the cravings come, and i stuggle like mad and give in. what i would like to know, is how did you cope with this? and how long does it take?? please.

By: Maria

Maria — Mon, 08 Feb 2010 21:41:49 +0000

I agree on that that selfcriticism takes a lots of energy from a person leading to depression. That’s what depression is: law level of energy. it’s much more useful to practice breathing psychotherapy in order to restore the level of energy than take some benzodiazepines which normally lead to addiction.
A person needs to learn how to forgive him or herself and understand that everyone makes mistakes!

By: Paul

Paul — Tue, 19 Jan 2010 18:55:00 +0000

Well, after drinking 32 pints of cider a week which to me was way too much and also drinking every day since I was 14 (47) now, I can say it’s easy to give up without any help from anyone but yourself.
Make a day and stop, that’s it, easy

Still not had a drop since my date dec7th 2009, saved £120 and prob my liver, family and job.

I feel great knowing I can get up in a morning and not worry about driving, I can come home at night and not worry about if anyone needs me to do anything for them involving driving, and as for being boring at parties I have proved that I am still as daft, happy and funny as I was when I had a drink.

Beer is like cigs, it’s addictive and you must take control and stamp on it.