To all of you, I'm sorry for using BE as a dumping ground for my self obsessed, self pity filled whinges and for not getting myself sorted out by now. I really am trying to move forward with my life, but its not fair to come here wittering on and on about how hard I have it. I wasn't trying to get p...

Digga, I'm not sure how to respond to your post. I feel very hurt that you are so obviously fed up of hearing me whingeing here. I come here cos I have no-one else to open up to, and if I post here it helps me work out a way forward for my life. Is it possible for you to just not read my posts if yo...

Hi guys. Well, it's been a week for me now, with the help of Antabuse. Still very tired but not as bad so I must be getting used to it (tiredness is a side effect of the med). Don't like weekends or days off at the mo, nowt to do if I don't drink. Well, it's not that, it's that I can't chill out unl...

Hi Guys, day five for me, third day on the Antabuse. Meds still making me tired as hell but better for that reason than cos I'm p**sed. I'm getting a lot of work done, but my main prob when sober is that I can't relax/unwind/switch off. I am trying to look forward to the fact that I will lose weight...

Linda, you are SPOT ON about it better to be tired for a good reason than from drinking, I SO feel that way :) Caroline, the coconut water is lovely, it has little cubes of coconut in it too, really refreshing. Not low calorie, but fewer calories than all that booze ;) I got mine from a nearby India...

Hi guys. I am sooooooooooo very tired today. I’m rather hungry but don’t feel like I want to eat. I feel all kind of mixed up today, my head is spinning with all sorts of things, personal and business. Tired above everything else. I really want to go back home to bed and sleep, sleep, sleep, wit...

Bless you me dear thanks <:)> Funny, being sober at work today, I have got sooooo much done today. I can be calm and logical and can prioritise without my emotions getting in the way. I always get loads done at work sober. Hubby is working away today, prob not back till 8pm, it feels like a totally ...

Hi guys, not been here for a while, last time I posted I was waiting for an appointment to get some Antabuse and psychotherapy. Today i started on the Antabuse (it can make you extremely sick if you drink so it's a good deterrant, even any alcohol in food or medicines can affect you), I had to be dr...

Hey Linda, you just caught me before I go home. We have two dogs, one is a Jack Russell called Milo aks Dinks (short for 'dinky' cos he's so cute), a real sweetie, completely bonkers, likes mountaineering up people, loves cuddles but is also blessed with wild uncontrollable teeth, sometimes if he do...

Hi guys, thought I'd drop by. I am hanging on to life at the moment a bit better than I have been. I had my blood test this morning for them to check my liver function before putting me on Antabuse and getting my psychotherapy underway. A funny thing, it's almost like my brain is preparing itself fo...

Hi guys, just a quickie as I need to get off home soon. Before I witter on about me, I just wanted to say to starryeyesee, I self harmed for many, many years, and sometimes it is still a struggle not to. Iyou want someone to talk to you are welcome to PM me. I try and get on the forum most days, but...

Thanks all, feeling too sick to write more right now. Am going home to bed, I feel so sick and got bad stomach cramps, doubtless from the booze. catch you later, thanks again for being so nice to me

So here I am again. I am so close to falling apart it’s terrifying. You may recall, I was seeing about getting some help and therapy, etc. The latest is that I have been referred for psychotherapy, and am also going to go on Antabuse to get me off drink, as they won’t give me therapy unless I’...

Awww thanks guys :oops: Nice words really help :) What you said, Bev, about having been talked to with distain, I know that very well, not so much with alcohol, but I used to self harm a lot, and, in the early years (maybe 25 years ago), I would go into casualty to get stitched up and they would loo...

Hi Andy, know what you mean about AA, I have lots of reservations too, but when you're desperate it's worth trying anything. I don't have a problem with the religious overtones, or with the fact that they say abstinance is the only way etc. You don't have to agree with everything they say, they are ...

Hi Sunworshipper, thanks for the thoughts. oddly enough, when i googled AA meetings in my area, I was shocked to find out that there is actually a group that meets in my village - no excuses about 'can't get there, too far away to be bothered going' etc...maybe someone's trying to tell me something ...

Hi guys, thanks for the various posts. Went out to see my friends on Sat, and did drink, and on Sunday too. I haven't drunk today but that's only so far - I'm at work now, without the car so I can't just nip out for a bottle, but who knows what will happen when I go home. I know I absolutely must ke...

Well I've got thro all my essential work stuff for today, technically I could go home now, but I'm feeling a bit better so I'll stay a while. The get-together tomorrow night, it's not a party as you would know it, it's just three old farts getting together for a laugh and a catch-up. these are my on...

Hi both, thanks for your nice words :) Mark, I think you have a point about being angry with the alcohol rather than myself...but at the end of the day, it's an inanimate object, it isn't forcing itself down my neck, I am choosing to pick it up...hmmm maybe I'll try to get back to shouting at the EA...

Hi guys, today is day two for me. The last couple of weeks have been horrible, horrible enough to stop drinking so I guess every down side has an up. I have felt so ill yest and today, sick, weak, light headed, just so ill. Didn't eat much at all yest and only well enough to pick today and sip water...