The Road to Abstinence.

New Members thread, SOS thread, Daily chat and Support, Cutting Down, Abstinence and more.
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Action
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Re: The Road to Abstinence.

Post by Action »

Thanks Trojan and SB <:)>

Congratulations Sue (::)
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AJH
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Re: The Road to Abstinence.

Post by AJH »

Thanks Topcat, Trojan and Mark. Well done Sue, congratulations.

I am 4 months sober/abstinent yesterday! Thankfully…
Spotted Dick, butter and brown muscovado sugar. Gypsy Tart. Butterfly Buns. Just like your Nan used to make.

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AmyJean
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Re: The Road to Abstinence.

Post by AmyJean »

Hi everyone. I haven't posted for ages. Lost the last one and couldn't be bothered to re-type. But I'm doing fine. 87 days or something. I need to refer to my app to check. Well done Sue. I'm like that with smoking now. I can't remember when I stopped and I never think about it. I currently feel in a good place with alcohol. A birthday (not mine) and a book group are coming up this week and I was slightly worried about drinking but I'm pretty sure I won't. I have let out my bedroom to a friend's daughter and I'm hoping that will mean I never sit drinking on my own and running out to the shop because nobody will know. She only moved in yesterday. She's got a cat which has woken me up early already. Yikes. V wise words btw Pink. It is ridiculous how we glorify alcohol and encourage people to drink to relax etc. I know the first one can seem like it's helping. I'm in a WhatsApp challenge group. Mostly mothers with young children who are reaching for the bottle in the early evening. I'm not saying they have a problem but it is v typical to use alcohol as a release. I'm happy without it at the moment. Long may that continue. Stay safe and sober folks. X
And I said to my body softly 'I want to be your friend'. It took a long sigh and said 'I've waited my whole life for this'

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Re: The Road to Abstinence.

Post by Smithster »

Trojan wrote:
05 Sep 2021 19:17
Hi Action,

A syndrome is defined as “a group of symptoms which consistently occur together, or a condition characterised by a set of associated symptoms”.

PAWS is common enough that I think it exists as a combination of physical and psychological symptoms. It has similarities across the board, but also differences from person to person that make it hard to pin down :?

Steven Melemis describes it here…

https://www.addictionsandrecovery.org/p ... drawal.htm

Personally I found it helpful to attribute odd spells to PAWS, as a way to push through without feeling that I had to do anything specific about it ;)?

Edit: for an overall summary by Melemis, see this link…
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articl ... _3_325.pdf
Useful links and thanks for sharing. I didn't know PAWS could last for up to 2 years. But if it it can that would explain a few things to myself with how I have been feeling of late. Exhaustion and Brain fog.

Interesting reading on the second link reference cross addiction. Need to work on that with my sugar cravings, which by now are I assume purely a mental hurdle to overcome.

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Re: The Road to Abstinence.

Post by silvergirl »

Huge well done on four fabulous years sober SueDenim! \:)/ \:)/ \:)/ \:)/

Baby steps really do add up to big strides hey?! Thanks for sharing. <:)>

Love to all on the road <:)>
sgx
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Pink Panther
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Re: The Road to Abstinence.

Post by Pink Panther »

Sue D <:)> massive congrats to you I hope you are proud as proud can be \:)/ \:)/ \:)/ spotted your post the other day and forgot to offer my best wishes.....you have been a great help on here.

Amy J - that’s fantastic \:)/ \:)/

Sorry no time to refer back any further but will try and read and check in asap. Hope everyone is doing well. <:)>
Love yourself and be proud of the steps you take to overcome addiction....peace is at the tip of our fingers <:)>

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seamus54
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Re: The Road to Abstinence.

Post by seamus54 »

GOod morning roadies. Just a check in, bright eyed today! SUummer is winding down here- it's been very relaxing, but looking forward to re-engaging the world! Stres level is low so that helps. After all the relaxation in the last month I need to tune up my coping skills!

Thanks for sharing and listening. It's much better than talking to myself! (::)

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Re: The Road to Abstinence.

Post by squirrel »

I cant believe how quiet the forum is at the moment. Maybe for good reasons... Just want to say hi to all of my fellow travellers on this sometimes bumpy road. Be positive and be kind to yourselves. It's worth the journey however hard it sometimes seems. Have a good week.

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AJH
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Re: The Road to Abstinence.

Post by AJH »

Hello all too…still on the road. ;)?
Spotted Dick, butter and brown muscovado sugar. Gypsy Tart. Butterfly Buns. Just like your Nan used to make.

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SueDenim
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Re: The Road to Abstinence.

Post by SueDenim »

Thanks for the congratulations, everyone.

I don’t post much these days, but do check in now and then. As some of you might remember, I have liver disease as a result of drinking. The diagnosis was what finally made me stop, as previously I really didn’t think I could do it.

When I did, I was astonished at how ‘easy’ it was. Knowing that you have no choice is a good way to stop, but also the worst way, if you know what I mean. It sneaks up, too. I knew I wasn’t well for months before I went to the doctor, but convinced myself that it was down to other things - the symptoms are vague, and it’s true - you don’t feel them till it’s too late.

I still feel very ashamed of my condition, and hate having to mention it to doctors and put it on forms for things like insurance (not that I’ve needed any lately!). The routine tests are a pain (LFTs, ultrasounds and endoscopies) as they are never all done at once, so it feels like there is always an appointment on the horizon, and waiting for results can be stressful.

Still, if I hadn’t stopped I’d probably be dead by now, so on balance it’s not all gloom - four years later I’m still here, and whereas I’m not going to get better, I’m not getting worse, and life without booze is surprisingly enjoyable.

The point of all this is really that nobody should put off stopping drinking. If you stop before you’ve done any harm you can have all the good bits about sobriety, but with no invasive tests and expensive insurance :)

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Re: The Road to Abstinence.

Post by squirrel »

Thanks for sharing that Sue, and well done on your four years (::) It's mostly health scares that make me stop. Then start again... But one day maybe the stopping can be permanent.

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SueDenim
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Re: The Road to Abstinence.

Post by SueDenim »

Without wishing to be harsh, you will stop one day. Either with your health intact, with it badly compromised (like mine, although to be honest I feel better than I did when I was drinking) or because it’s killed you.

I know which I would choose if I could turn the clock back.

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Topcat
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Re: The Road to Abstinence.

Post by Topcat »

SueDenim wrote:
13 Sep 2021 15:59
Without wishing to be harsh, you will stop one day. Either with your health intact, with it badly compromised (like mine, although to be honest I feel better than I did when I was drinking) or because it’s killed you.

I know which I would choose if I could turn the clock back.
Very well put Sue. Thank you for that post ;)?

It's a hard fact to come to terms with, but alcohol is a poison and it wrecks lives and also kills. There is absolutely no need to keep drinking it, but still we do it - promising to quit tomorrow, the next week or some day in the future. Why wait? Do it now and don't delay- it could just save your life.
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seamus54
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Re: The Road to Abstinence.

Post by seamus54 »

Thanks TC, reminding me that alcohol is poison and why would I drink poison!! That’s my motivation to not drink today. Having a good few Weeks but each day I need renewed strength.

Hang in there, roadies!

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Action
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Re: The Road to Abstinence.

Post by Action »

Does anyone have any online meeting recommendations? I’m looking to find some additional support as I move into my 2nd year. I think I’m going to need it. Thank you.
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Take a new grip with your tired hands and stand firm on your shaky legs. Mark out a straight path for your feet.

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Trojan
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Re: The Road to Abstinence.

Post by Trojan »

Hello Action,

I’m sorry to see that you’re finding things a bit uphill lately <:)>

Milestones can bring their own pressures, and building them up too much can risk a sense of anti-climax, and “What now?” feelings afterwards. Maybe take some time out from dwelling on it. You can well afford to relax - to recognise just how far you’ve come, and how much your life has changed for the better over the past year :)

Bear in mind that the longer you go without drink, the less influence it has on your life :idea: The thoughts and feelings you’re experiencing now may very well have other causes.

Do you have some stress-busters you can use? Stress is cumulative, so each and every small respite will reduce the buildup and keep it manageable. Maybe tackle some of the smaller stressors first, and you’ll feel a weight lift. The breathing space it creates will allow you to move ahead with a lighter step. Taking the first step is usually the hardest, so give yourself credit for each step forward.

I think you’re right to look ahead towards the next stages, and plan to introduce new supports and activities before you truly need them, but please see that you’re doing so by choice and from a position of strength. Fear nothing :-)

Take care <:)>
Au milieu de l'hiver, j'apprenais enfin qu'il y avait en moi un été invincible.
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AJH
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Re: The Road to Abstinence.

Post by AJH »

Action wrote:
13 Sep 2021 21:24
Does anyone have any online meeting recommendations? I’m looking to find some additional support as I move into my 2nd year. I think I’m going to need it. Thank you.
Evening Action.

I’m quite a novice re mtgs but I’m so glad they’re on line now and hope they stay in place even now face to face AA mtgs are opening up. Apologies, I’m only recently back in this forum so I don’t know if you’re a boy or girl(!) unless I track through your posts.

Given my newness to the mtgs, I can’t really say I’ve experienced very many…I join a women’s only mtg on Monday, Friday (which I really like) and sometimes a Sunday women’s only mtg and a local mixed one to me on Thursday and a mixed mtg in Bournemouth on Saturdays. Bournemouth has the Bournemouth daily mtg which is every day at 7.30-8.30pm. I really like it because this was the first mtg I joined and because these meetings have a varied range of people in terms of age and length of time sober/abstinent. They’re lively and vibrant, kind and supportive…hence me continuing to attend at least one of these each week despite coming home to Kent after a period of rehab in Bournemouth.

Anyway, apologies for not knowing if your male or female but if a girl, I can let you know dial in details of the women’s ones and/or the Bournemouth Daily.

Ally
Spotted Dick, butter and brown muscovado sugar. Gypsy Tart. Butterfly Buns. Just like your Nan used to make.

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Re: The Road to Abstinence.

Post by SoberBoots »

Action wrote:
13 Sep 2021 21:24
Does anyone have any online meeting recommendations? I’m looking to find some additional support as I move into my 2nd year. I think I’m going to need it. Thank you.
There's the ones listed on AA, and people also speak well of SMART meetings
The best time to plant a tree was 30 years ago. The second best time is today.

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seamus54
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Re: The Road to Abstinence.

Post by seamus54 »

Good morning all. Bright eyed today rafter a very stressful day.

for Action, I attend online SMART meetings (630 PM us et- so not great for you!) and i feel they are helping me. It's good to talk out loud instead to myself, and get support. There are large meetings 1000-120 where you can listen/learn tools and participate if you want. And small (10-12) meeting where you can get to know a group, but can still just listen if you want. The facilitators vary in style, so you can "Shop around" Meeting in UK and US. There morning Daytime meetings in US which might work. Sign up is free. Heres a UK link for local meetings (assuming you are in the UK!)>\

https://smartrecovery.org.uk/online-meetings/

and a large meeting link

https://www.smartrecovery.org/community/calendar.php

Hope this helps ;)?

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Action
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Re: The Road to Abstinence.

Post by Action »

Thank you everyone. <:)>
I shall explore the different possibilities.
#38 on 2021 Challenge
Take a new grip with your tired hands and stand firm on your shaky legs. Mark out a straight path for your feet.

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