Online Alcohol Therapy |  Do you need professional help? |  Alcoholism & Recovery Articles |  Self Help Resources

The Joke Page

New Members thread, SOS thread, Daily chat and Support, Cutting Down, Abstinence and more.
User avatar
Newt
Posts: 14382
Joined: 25 Jun 2013 12:40
Last Drink Date: 10 Aug 2014
Location: Six foot away from you!
Contact:

Re: The Joke Page

Post by Newt » 23 May 2020 15:16

:lol:
Social distancing since 1966

User avatar
Newt
Posts: 14382
Joined: 25 Jun 2013 12:40
Last Drink Date: 10 Aug 2014
Location: Six foot away from you!
Contact:

Re: The Joke Page

Post by Newt » 25 May 2020 18:29

BREAKING

Two ships collided on the Thames today, one with a cargo of red paint, the other blue, both crews have been marooned.
Social distancing since 1966

User avatar
Rachel
Posts: 8254
Joined: 22 Jul 2011 14:54
Last Drink Date: 20 Jul 2012
Location: South East London
Contact:

Re: The Joke Page

Post by Rachel » 25 May 2020 21:21

agggh!


More humour than a joke...


10628596_10152424117142027_242560218623252890_n.jpg
10628596_10152424117142027_242560218623252890_n.jpg (44.74 KiB) Viewed 535 times
Since seeing this, I have not been able to look a single dachshund in the eye. Not even when I'm lying on the ground...
Rachel

User avatar
Newt
Posts: 14382
Joined: 25 Jun 2013 12:40
Last Drink Date: 10 Aug 2014
Location: Six foot away from you!
Contact:

Re: The Joke Page

Post by Newt » 26 May 2020 12:48

:lol:


It's true.jpg
It's true.jpg (65.55 KiB) Viewed 520 times
Social distancing since 1966

User avatar
Mark.
Posts: 23504
Joined: 15 Jun 2010 11:58
Location: Uri Geller's barbecue
Contact:

Re: The Joke Page

Post by Mark. » 26 May 2020 14:08

:lol: :lol: :lol: (::) (::)
Nie chwal dnia przed zachodem słońca.

User avatar
Newt
Posts: 14382
Joined: 25 Jun 2013 12:40
Last Drink Date: 10 Aug 2014
Location: Six foot away from you!
Contact:

Re: The Joke Page

Post by Newt » 27 May 2020 07:03

He he he he.jpg
He he he he.jpg (141.29 KiB) Viewed 504 times
Social distancing since 1966

User avatar
Rachel
Posts: 8254
Joined: 22 Jul 2011 14:54
Last Drink Date: 20 Jul 2012
Location: South East London
Contact:

Re: The Joke Page

Post by Rachel » 27 May 2020 11:12

(::)
Rachel

User avatar
Newt
Posts: 14382
Joined: 25 Jun 2013 12:40
Last Drink Date: 10 Aug 2014
Location: Six foot away from you!
Contact:

Re: The Joke Page

Post by Newt » 28 May 2020 07:36

With all the raving going on about horse manure I thought I'd give it a go on my rhubarb this year,


I must admit though, I still prefer custard :?
Social distancing since 1966

User avatar
Sheila
Posts: 16886
Joined: 09 Jan 2009 16:09
Last Drink Date: 17 Aug 2018
Location: Sussex UK
Contact:

Re: The Joke Page

Post by Sheila » 28 May 2020 07:44

(w) :lol:
#4 on the 2020 Challenge
I will not drink again no matter what.

User avatar
Newt
Posts: 14382
Joined: 25 Jun 2013 12:40
Last Drink Date: 10 Aug 2014
Location: Six foot away from you!
Contact:

Re: The Joke Page

Post by Newt » 28 May 2020 08:03

Dairy Cows Give More Milk When You Say Their Name


So it's a case of in one ear and out the udder :roll:
Social distancing since 1966

User avatar
Mark.
Posts: 23504
Joined: 15 Jun 2010 11:58
Location: Uri Geller's barbecue
Contact:

Re: The Joke Page

Post by Mark. » 28 May 2020 08:07

:lol: :lol:

The cow in the photo could do with a warm blanket. It looks like it's friesian.




Apologies.
Nie chwal dnia przed zachodem słońca.

User avatar
Newt
Posts: 14382
Joined: 25 Jun 2013 12:40
Last Drink Date: 10 Aug 2014
Location: Six foot away from you!
Contact:

Re: The Joke Page

Post by Newt » 28 May 2020 11:01

Cud be the grass (w)


Now it's my turn to apologise I suppose :roll:
Social distancing since 1966

User avatar
Mark.
Posts: 23504
Joined: 15 Jun 2010 11:58
Location: Uri Geller's barbecue
Contact:

Re: The Joke Page

Post by Mark. » 28 May 2020 11:07

:lol: :lol:
Nie chwal dnia przed zachodem słońca.

User avatar
free flow
Posts: 1235
Joined: 20 Apr 2012 13:47
Last Drink Date: 26 Feb 2019
Location: North of the 49th Parallel, East of Eden
Contact:

Re: The Joke Page

Post by free flow » 31 May 2020 14:56

NOTIICE: Trump announces that vicious dogs and ominous weapons will be used if protesters storm the White House!

Apparently Ivanka, Jared and the rest of the family will be coming for the weekend :mrgreen:
The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you really are. - Carl Jung

User avatar
Newt
Posts: 14382
Joined: 25 Jun 2013 12:40
Last Drink Date: 10 Aug 2014
Location: Six foot away from you!
Contact:

Re: The Joke Page

Post by Newt » 31 May 2020 15:29

:lol:


If Trump ever has to stand trial do you think he'll be tried as an adult? :?
Social distancing since 1966

User avatar
Newt
Posts: 14382
Joined: 25 Jun 2013 12:40
Last Drink Date: 10 Aug 2014
Location: Six foot away from you!
Contact:

Re: The Joke Page

Post by Newt » 31 May 2020 15:32

Space X has just docked with the ISS, may I be the first to congratulate the two astronauts for leaving earth safely, wise move :D
Social distancing since 1966

User avatar
free flow
Posts: 1235
Joined: 20 Apr 2012 13:47
Last Drink Date: 26 Feb 2019
Location: North of the 49th Parallel, East of Eden
Contact:

Re: The Joke Page

Post by free flow » 31 May 2020 17:42

If Trump ever has to stand trial do you think he'll be tried as an adult?
Gotta believe no sane lawyer would go for anything but the insanity defense (Guilani excepted).
Newt wrote:
31 May 2020 15:32
Space X has just docked with the ISS, may I be the first to congratulate the two astronauts for leaving earth safely, wise move :D
Gotta be the most intelligent 2 people from the USA right now ()o
The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you really are. - Carl Jung

User avatar
Wilson
Posts: 1053
Joined: 24 Nov 2019 21:36
Last Drink Date: 24 Nov 2019
Contact:

Re: The Joke Page

Post by Wilson » 01 Jun 2020 18:24

683544E8-C95F-4DD7-A8F6-8C65519852F2.jpeg
683544E8-C95F-4DD7-A8F6-8C65519852F2.jpeg (84.13 KiB) Viewed 396 times

User avatar
Newt
Posts: 14382
Joined: 25 Jun 2013 12:40
Last Drink Date: 10 Aug 2014
Location: Six foot away from you!
Contact:

Re: The Joke Page

Post by Newt » 01 Jun 2020 20:27

:lol: (::) :lol:
Social distancing since 1966

User avatar
Newt
Posts: 14382
Joined: 25 Jun 2013 12:40
Last Drink Date: 10 Aug 2014
Location: Six foot away from you!
Contact:

Re: The Joke Page

Post by Newt » 14 Jun 2020 15:41

Are we still allowed to put our black bags out next week or would that be just asking for trouble?
Social distancing since 1966

Post Reply