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The Wobble Board

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na
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Re: The Wobble Board

Post by na » 03 Jul 2020 21:32

Wobbling all over the place. No idea what triggered it. Maybe the weekend, a bit of boredom. I’m in bed with pjs on. I’ve done this most nights. I know it will pass. The cravings have subsided but they are still there lingering around. I’m not going to drink tonight. I want to but I can’t. I just can’t
Na x
Change is always possible - anytime, at any moment

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pickles
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Re: The Wobble Board

Post by pickles » 03 Jul 2020 21:47

Keep online for as much as possible, na. Do you have some films, book, gentle exercise ? Water by the bed. Good it’s subsiding. As you say it will pass . I’ve been watching the Alan Bennett’s Talking Heads . On part 3 now . Otherwise, not sure why , royal family documentary on you tube .

I hope tomorrow morning will be ok 👍
' Normal ' is just a setting on the washing machine .

na
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Re: The Wobble Board

Post by na » 03 Jul 2020 22:04

Thank you Pickles I've just put it on and its up my street
Na x
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Cowboy
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Re: The Wobble Board

Post by Cowboy » 03 Jul 2020 22:19

Hang in there na. You'll feel better for it in the morning. Absolute certainty.
The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why. Mark Twain.

na
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Re: The Wobble Board

Post by na » 04 Jul 2020 10:00

;)?
Thanks for last night Pickles and Cowboy it really helped.
I woke up this morning and my husband asked me if I wanted a gin. He was showing me how situational the craving was and how I’d never dream of wanting to drink in the morning, although I know that could always be a progression.
I wobbled because I started to doubt whether I needed to completely abstain. I entertained the idea that I could have a drink on Friday night after a long day at work. After all my other half can with his curry. I even told him to go and get himself a beer ‘if he wanted one’, he did but he knows I’m trying to stop so denied himself. I’m a lucky woman.
Na x
Change is always possible - anytime, at any moment

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pickles
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Re: The Wobble Board

Post by pickles » 04 Jul 2020 11:02

;)?
' Normal ' is just a setting on the washing machine .

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Vornec
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Re: The Wobble Board

Post by Vornec » 08 Jul 2020 04:06

It’s been since 2014 and I have stayed strong. Tonight I find myself pulling a bottle out of the fridge. If I sip this it could be all over. I put it back, thought about it some more and pulled it out again. Back in the fridge, Untouched.

That was tonight, thinking maybe I could stand staying here if I drank. Still not worth it. I just want to leave but for the kids. I’m in stupid trouble.

For now, I’ll say no to the EAF.

-Vornec

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Mountainhare
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Re: The Wobble Board

Post by Mountainhare » 08 Jul 2020 05:38

Pour it away Vornec. You are on dangerous ground. Pour it away.
Then, try and find a way to relax and reduce stress. Remember how far you have come. Sit and think about that - 2014. Six years.

Whatever is going on now will pass. Hang in there, get rid of the booze and look after yourself.

MH
Self reflection, meditation and gratitude when logically interwoven provide an unshakeable foundation for living.

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Mark.
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Re: The Wobble Board

Post by Mark. » 08 Jul 2020 09:17

I agree with MH, Vornec - stay strong ;)? <:)>
Nie chwal dnia przed zachodem słońca.

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Vornec
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Re: The Wobble Board

Post by Vornec » 08 Jul 2020 11:19

I’ll do my best. I’m just so lonely and depressed right now.

Thanks for the support, I need it.

-Vornec

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Mark.
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Re: The Wobble Board

Post by Mark. » 08 Jul 2020 11:21

Vornec wrote:
08 Jul 2020 11:19
I’ll do my best. I’m just so lonely and depressed right now.

Thanks for the support, I need it.

-Vornec
No worries, Vornec! Keep posting away here if it helps ;)? <:)>
Nie chwal dnia przed zachodem słońca.

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Re: The Wobble Board

Post by Lennylenny » 08 Jul 2020 14:12

Fourth day, shakes and shitting!! I know I got to do this, drinking beck blues and eating. Little things like walking the dog without a k cider in my hand is the hardest. I see people walking around with tins in hand and I think what wankers, tho that was me just four days ago drinking bottle wine down in one while pretending to go out for a paper, bad isn’t it, I should have sympathy for those with this disease but too wrapped up in my own condition

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Vornec
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Re: The Wobble Board

Post by Vornec » 09 Jul 2020 00:58

Mark and Mountainhare, thanks so much, wobble stabilized. Had a good day and can see the future a little bit. Some things to hope for anyway, ya know.

Makes it all not that bad.

Goodbye EAF, stay away.

Still a close call.

-Vornec

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Mountainhare
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Re: The Wobble Board

Post by Mountainhare » 09 Jul 2020 05:30

Nice one Vornec, that’s so good to hear my mate.

Lenny, hope you are feeling better today. Hang in there, you know the score, it will get easier.

MH
Self reflection, meditation and gratitude when logically interwoven provide an unshakeable foundation for living.

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Mark.
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Re: The Wobble Board

Post by Mark. » 09 Jul 2020 06:57

Excellent! Well done, Vornec, and thanks for letting us know! I think things keep improving today ;)?

Lennylenny, how are you today? As MH says, it will get easier. Keep fighting!
Nie chwal dnia przed zachodem słońca.

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Re: The Wobble Board

Post by Lennylenny » 09 Jul 2020 08:56

Yer good, got to go back to work tommorow , bricking it!

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Mountainhare
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Re: The Wobble Board

Post by Mountainhare » 09 Jul 2020 09:14

Can you find a way of taking a week off? Might be a good investment in your sobriety.
Self reflection, meditation and gratitude when logically interwoven provide an unshakeable foundation for living.

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Vornec
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Re: The Wobble Board

Post by Vornec » 10 Jul 2020 02:49

Another really good day... at work.

Still bummin’ about the state of my marriage but I gotta focus on the good. I used to drink away the loneliness, but now I just focus harder on the kids, and they’re all getting to pretty good ages where we can just be around each other and it’s easy, rewarding, and fun. I miss my kids while I am work, I can’t leave my wife and split time with her and go days without them!

But our marriage sucks for me. We have been to counseling (with some success) but it turns out we are just two different people. Nothing wrong with her at all, just different. I need more out of a relationship and I am not talking about the bedroom. She told me in December after a fight that she was not the right person for me and I backpedalled hard to get her to stop talking like it’s over, which I think it is.

I just can’t stand the thought of living without my children. Not even for a day. I even love our family together, my wife in it. I just want her to be different, which isn’t fair to either of us. I am an extrovert. She is an introvert. I am tidy, she likes messy. She love’s relaxing, I like constant activity. She loves movies, I fall asleep. She doesn’t like my family. I love hers. But... We travel great together. We make good plans and do pretty well sticking to them. We both love our story and our children. She’s a great cook when she wants to be. Many other attributes, of course....

I just don’t know what to do. I am stuck in the world of “not that bad” and I would have to give up so much just for a chance of better, risking utter loneliness. On the other hand, we both have needs that aren’t getting met.

Just gotta suck it up and deal I guess.

Thanks for listening to me rant.

-Vornec

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Re: The Wobble Board

Post by Lennylenny » 10 Jul 2020 16:15

I was same as you, we just didn’t love each other, then we made the break and I found the person who is right for me. Kids are so resilient, after a few tears and dramas they get used to there parents splitting, you may not think it but they sense unhappiness and can see when things just aren’t right,

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