General Support and Chat

New Members thread, SOS thread, Daily chat and Support, Cutting Down, Abstinence and more.
User avatar
lawrence
Posts: 290
Joined: 10 Jan 2011 19:09
Last Drink Date: 22 Apr 2017
Location: East Midlands, UK
Contact:

Re: December General Support and Chat

Post by lawrence »

It's not easy being on your tod at this time of year is it, Luke?

There's nothing wrong with 'me, me, me' posts. I was worried that I was doing that and posted to that effect a couple of weeks back, but was quickly told that that's quite normal when you're in the thick of it and not to worry, so I'm passing that on to you lol

You're not posting only 'me,me, me' posts tho- you posted a couple of comments yesterday that resonated with me and therefore helped me.

So thanks

;)? <:)>

User avatar
lawrence
Posts: 290
Joined: 10 Jan 2011 19:09
Last Drink Date: 22 Apr 2017
Location: East Midlands, UK
Contact:

Re: December General Support and Chat

Post by lawrence »

Luke1980 wrote:
lawrence wrote:It's not easy being on your tod at this time of year is it, Luke?

There's nothing wrong with 'me, me, me' posts. I was worried that I was doing that and posted to that effect a couple of weeks back, but was quickly told that that's quite normal when you're in the thick of it and not to worry, so I'm passing that on to you lol

You're not posting only 'me,me, me' posts tho- you posted a couple of comments yesterday that resonated with me and therefore helped me.

So thanks

;)? <:)>
Hiya Lawrence,

That's good to know!

How do you cope with friends asking you out drinking?

I've told him time and time again that I'm trying to stop, but he chooses not to hear me.

:roll:
Hmm, I'm not sure to be honest. I'm relatively new to this and haven't come up against this yet. But then I'm not really a pub kind of person. My drinking is mainly at home.

I was invitd out for a drink a couple of times over Christmas, and to be honest I found the best solution was to lie and say I had a stomach bug. Not a long term solution, but it gives me time to think of how to deal with those situations.

User avatar
frozensprouts
Posts: 233
Joined: 20 Dec 2011 00:29
Last Drink Date: 17 Dec 2011
Contact:

Re: December General Support and Chat

Post by frozensprouts »

Luke1980 wrote:
lawrence wrote:It's not easy being on your tod at this time of year is it, Luke?

There's nothing wrong with 'me, me, me' posts. I was worried that I was doing that and posted to that effect a couple of weeks back, but was quickly told that that's quite normal when you're in the thick of it and not to worry, so I'm passing that on to you lol

You're not posting only 'me,me, me' posts tho- you posted a couple of comments yesterday that resonated with me and therefore helped me.

So thanks

;)? <:)>
Hiya Lawrence,

That's good to know!

How do you cope with friends asking you out drinking?

I've told him time and time again that I'm trying to stop, but he chooses not to hear me.

:roll:
I'm struggling with this as well as it just feels like my options are either to drink or become a recluse if I want a social life. This is because it's early days though.....going to have to find new ways to socialise I guess but not ready yet. There's this great quiz night tomorrow but I cant go...no way I can sit there and not drink, so staying in.
Do you think that you aren’t free? You are free, but you do not know that you are free—and it is your not knowing that you are free that is your limitation and your imprisonment. Realize your freedom, and you are free.

User avatar
KraftyKat
Posts: 395
Joined: 06 Jul 2011 22:47
Last Drink Date: 28 Jun 2020
Location: England
Contact:

Re: December General Support and Chat

Post by KraftyKat »

Has Linda changed her name (ready for the New Year)?
One reason I don't drink is that I want to know when I am having a good time.
Nancy Astor

User avatar
lawrence
Posts: 290
Joined: 10 Jan 2011 19:09
Last Drink Date: 22 Apr 2017
Location: East Midlands, UK
Contact:

Re: December General Support and Chat

Post by lawrence »

Just checking in for today. Good to see so many people positive after Christmas ;)?

Not a great day for me. Reduced slightly last night so still on target. Although the amount I drank is large by most people's standards, it is the lowest amount I've drunk for 3 weeks. However, for the first time in ages I actually felt pretty drunk quite quickly and woke up with a hangover. That's odd as even when drinking at full whack I haven't had a hangover for a long time. Maybe it's just my body adjusting or something.

Have felt not very well all day and didn't want to start drinking this evening but am following advice and continuing to reduce very slowly.

User avatar
lawrence
Posts: 290
Joined: 10 Jan 2011 19:09
Last Drink Date: 22 Apr 2017
Location: East Midlands, UK
Contact:

Re: December General Support and Chat

Post by lawrence »

off to bed now.

Elizabeth41
Posts: 772
Joined: 17 Dec 2011 15:54
Last Drink Date: 17 Dec 2015
Contact:

Re: December General Support and Chat

Post by Elizabeth41 »

Hello all (a long catch up - turn to the last page if bored lol)

I'm back from my trip to London.

My first sober Christmas and it was rather odd. There was enough booze in the house to sink a ship!

My son however concerned me as he was drinking treble Whiskey when out, wine and vodka in the house, he did not care about me or his sister and refused to walk us to the house we were staying in late at night and we got lost on the streets of London! eventually found the place. (he took me to the restaurant where he works and they were giving him trebles which they are not allowed to serve. I think that drink is a bit hard for an eighteen year old. My son got drunk every night I was with him! Nobody thought it wrong. His partner's mother told me that he was more relaxed and opened up to her more when he was drinking. I could have hit her for more than that reason but bit my tongue! I cannot be a hypocrite as he saw me drunk most of his life!

I did have a lovely time but now cannot stop crying as my son (who is living with his partner and his mum) lives with another family and doesn't want to live with me. He calls the other mother mum and asked her to get me Ralph Lauren perfume and makeup up from him. She got me unamamed cheap perfume and labelled it to Elizabeth ( not mum) from Anthony. He got her lots of nice gifts. Grrrrrrrrrrr I was sobbing all night Christmas night.

We stayed in another house. Very lucky to spend nearly a week rent free in London. My little boy has become distant to me and he broke my heart at Christmas time and I was tempted to get drunk with him! When we were out though I was paranoid in case someone put alcohol in my coke. I was paranoid that there was (and I think there was) alcohol in the gravy for Christmas dinner. I was paranoid that there was alcohol in the chocolates in the box. That freaked me out that state of mind!

I keep dreaming that I am drinking alcohol when I know I should not be drinking it and ashamed of myself in my dreams.

We walked passed lots of bars in London and they looked fun and happy. I would have loved to have gone for a few beers or wines but I know that if I have one, it will keep flowing....

I want to have a totally new lifestyle in 2012. I have had some awful relationships. (I think that is why my son left home at a young age as he saw a lot of men come and go...I chose bad men) The 'other mummy' devotes her life to her 22year old son and MY son! and work and does not have men in her life.

I wish there was a shower that could wash away all the sins of alcohol and nasty men from my past. I was not a bad mother to my son. He said he does not want to live with me as I am a clean freak and expect him to clean up after himself. He now lives in a huge house that resembles a building site come squat. He showed me the part of the house where he happily shares with his partner and it was disturbing...no matter now big the space you give him to live in...he will trash it! Anyway - none of this has anything to do with my alcohol problems lol...sorry.

When I am not drinking, I look back in shame. lol - like that song...when I look back upon my life, it's always with a sense of shame...it's a sin.

Christmas without alcohol was hard work because I do not know how to behave without alcohol at Christmas. I am nearly 2 weeks alcohol free now and I am in charge of my daughter and her friends New Year's Eve for a sober party. Yay!

Ok - I think I should shut up now.

Happy New Year all!

Elizabeth
I drink myself to a place where I don't care but wake up a person who cares enormously :oops:

User avatar
Rachel
Posts: 8318
Joined: 22 Jul 2011 14:54
Last Drink Date: 20 Jul 2012
Location: South East London
Contact:

Re: December General Support and Chat

Post by Rachel »

I am off into treatment again tomorrow. It feels like my last chance. I am up so late because I am panicking too much to sleep.But I am determined to make it work.
Rachel

Elizabeth41
Posts: 772
Joined: 17 Dec 2011 15:54
Last Drink Date: 17 Dec 2015
Contact:

Re: December General Support and Chat

Post by Elizabeth41 »

Good morning - I did not sleep a wink!

I feel like I did when I had been parting all night and had to work next morning. No wonder I lost my job as a Secretary 2 years ago. Too many mistakes and lack of concentration. I have worked since, but now out of work again.

Anyway - when I come back tonight 'metime' my daughter is going to her dad's for a few days. I shall be happy and positive and proud that I can stop drinking forever.....


Have a good day all

Elizabeth
I drink myself to a place where I don't care but wake up a person who cares enormously :oops:

CoolClearWater
Posts: 180
Joined: 14 Aug 2011 12:00
Last Drink Date: 20 Apr 2012
Contact:

Re: December General Support and Chat

Post by CoolClearWater »

Well done Elizabeth for getting through all that - you've chosen just about the most difficult time of the year to give up, so double well done. And good luck REMF with the treatment.

I guess I'm struggling a bit. Apart from two weeks in September/Oct I haven't drank since the beginning of August. This Christmas has been tough. It's not the season so much as all the spare time I've got. I live quite a quiet life (very quiet since I stopped going to the pubs - the one form of socialising I had), and don't have family get-togethers at Christmas, so it's not being with other drinkers that's the problem for me. I simply haven't yet worked out how to sufficiently fill my leisure time - I've always drank in my leisure time! When I'm working everything's fine - I'm tired at the end of the day, I've cycled to work and back, relax, eat dinner, watch telly or read - not a thought about drinking. Sometimes on a Saturday night I'm tempted. But this week off work has been terrible. I live in the middle of nowhere (my choice, I know), it's the darkest time of year, I'm a bit lonely and very bored - depressed, even. And this is leading to thoughts of drinking. And I'm a bit strapped for cash (the years of reckless drinking has taken it's toll). Yes I've got credit cards and could get on a plane today, but I'm trying to live within my means.

I know only I can sort this problem out - and let's face it, compared to a lot of people on here, it's not a problem at all. I just wish I had more imagination and get-up-and-go. There are jobs that need doing here at home. I think I'll try and start with that.

Best wishes all

CCW

scared.com
Posts: 20
Joined: 06 Dec 2011 08:47
Last Drink Date: 04 Dec 2011
Contact:

Re: December General Support and Chat

Post by scared.com »

well i feel really lost can't stop drinking even though i really don't want to drink anymore. i feel annoyed with myself and weak. sorry for the misery posting just need to speak out x

User avatar
caroline95
Posts: 6742
Joined: 04 Apr 2008 16:57
Location: Scotland UK

Re: December General Support and Chat

Post by caroline95 »

No need to apologise Scared, we've all been in your position, otherwise we wouldn't be here.Stay with us and keep posting - are you drinking now?Oh, and you're not weak, you're trying to deal with an addiction and that's not easy <:)>

Elizabeth41
Posts: 772
Joined: 17 Dec 2011 15:54
Last Drink Date: 17 Dec 2015
Contact:

Re: December General Support and Chat

Post by Elizabeth41 »

Hi it's metime - my daughter is away til Saturday! Now I would usually be out on the town at this time of year when my daughter is with her dad - but I am home alone. Bored and in pain with my poorly shoulder. I went to my GP this morning to get some Diazepam for my 'social phobia' I was told that they are addictive and not to get used to them but was prescribed 28 tabs yay! I tried to tell my GP that I drink/drank too much and had decided to stop but it came out wrong lol. I babbled and stammered feeling ashamed that when I drink I black out - I think she got the jist and said it was a good idea to decide not to do it anymore. I cannot sleep at night due to some stuff that has gone on the last few months and am in so much pain in my shoulder and all down my arm and chest (been like it for a few years but today it seems so much worse! - think its stress and posture). I made it worse carrying all my luggage to London and back - my daughter thinks she is a princess and refused to help and I am not an octopuss lol. So my GP prescribed me Noproxen for the inflammation and Amitriptyline to stop me staying awake all night dwelling. I am in and shake rattling and rolling with the tablets! lol - see they are working already the amount of lolling I am doing. I doubt they will have immediate effect though.

Now I am scaring the shite out of myself googling breast cancer and lung cancer ( my mother died of breast cancer just a few months ago) - too much time on my hands lol.

So in one appointment I had enough ailments for a morning surgery! lol - I also told her about having to witness my son living with another man and not comfortable with it all. I bet she needed a tea break after my visit and I bet you lot will be asleep now lol.

Oh yes - remember I posted somewhere that I imagined the bottles of wine were glued to the shelf?? well...today I wish they were because my bag knocked some down when I turned around in the supermarket - went down like dominoes they did but luckily by some miracle none smashed!

So - as I said at this time of year by now I would be out on the town and partying til I black out as no need for babysitters and no need to stay in looking at the four walls but here I am....happy to stay home warm and safe from the dangers of my binge drinking. yay!!! no more googling the worst scenarios!

Hope you are all ok this evening - very very windy out there!

Elizabeth
I drink myself to a place where I don't care but wake up a person who cares enormously :oops:

CoolClearWater
Posts: 180
Joined: 14 Aug 2011 12:00
Last Drink Date: 20 Apr 2012
Contact:

Re: December General Support and Chat

Post by CoolClearWater »

Zoe - thanks for the reply. Some of the things on your list I actually do. Admittedly none of the creative things. That's definately an empty area of my life.

What I failed to write earlier was that what is missing is FUN. I ain't having ANY. And that's what I don't know what to do about. I can pick up a book, go for a walk and so on, but on some days (right now) I feel like I'm just going through the motions. I don't know how to have fun without alcohol. I don't socialise anymore since I stopped drinking. In this remote spot where I live the only form of socialising is the pub. I don't know what to do. I hate to say it but I'm looking forward to going back to work - yet I've been looking forward to this break for weeks. My willpower is sure being tested at the moment.

Thanks again for the reply, and good luck all

CCW

Elizabeth41
Posts: 772
Joined: 17 Dec 2011 15:54
Last Drink Date: 17 Dec 2015
Contact:

Re: December General Support and Chat

Post by Elizabeth41 »

Thanks Zoe - I am rather bored to be honest lol.

Just reading the side effects from my tablets as you do.....thinking I will get them all!

The antideps state that they will start working in about 4 weeks time - I was prescribed 28 tablets one to be taken twice a day. Hmm that works out 2 weeks worth - I think that GP should learn how to add up! heehee

Child free and I will be spending the whole of tomorrow organising my daughter's room and the spare room ready for the big New Years Eve sleepover. I quite like tidying my daughter's room - I get to play with her toys when she is not looking! lol

Has anyone seen that film 28 Days with Sandra Bullock? I watched it on one of my after binge scares - very good film about a woman with a drink problem who is made to go into rehab as a court order from a drink driving offence. She is made to come to her senses and stop binging. I think I might put that on now and watch it to remind myself that there is life after drink....

Elizabeth
I drink myself to a place where I don't care but wake up a person who cares enormously :oops:

User avatar
bumpydog
Posts: 1867
Joined: 07 Nov 2008 12:07
Last Drink Date: 18 Nov 2012
Location: Northamptonshire
Contact:

Re: December General Support and Chat

Post by bumpydog »

Really not sure where to post this.

I've had enough! I really have.

What's the point anyway!

I need to go back to work on Tuesday and at this rate there is no way!

I need a change of career because I can't take the stress!

I can't stop drinking because I got myself in a hole and have been advised not to. But I've been reducing it all the time. And been successful! Its been blimmin hard! But I've done it!

Drunk far less tonight than I have done for ages. But I feel SO down. So down!

I'm a lost soul!

I want a new life and new job! But until I find one I'm stuck in hell.
If you have one foot in the past and one foot in the future you end up weeing on today...focus on today!

Elizabeth41
Posts: 772
Joined: 17 Dec 2011 15:54
Last Drink Date: 17 Dec 2015
Contact:

Re: December General Support and Chat

Post by Elizabeth41 »

Sorry you are in a bad place bumpydog.

At least you should not feel alone by coming in here.

I shall be online for a while if you want to offload. I was going to watch a dvd but I have Nottinghill on in the background - seen it so many times I don't need to look at the screen lol.

Elizabeth x
I drink myself to a place where I don't care but wake up a person who cares enormously :oops:

User avatar
bumpydog
Posts: 1867
Joined: 07 Nov 2008 12:07
Last Drink Date: 18 Nov 2012
Location: Northamptonshire
Contact:

Re: December General Support and Chat

Post by bumpydog »

Thanks Elizabeth.

I just don't know what to do with my self!

I need to change big time!

But I really think this means a new career for me!

I'm a teacher and I'm good at my job and I love being with the children in the classroom. But I've had enough of the crap that goes with it.

I could go on for hours but won't bore you!

So sad this evening. It's like I've come to a decision that I know is right but I am grieving! I really do love teaching and love it when I am in my classroom! And I know I am good at it! Always had good observations when someone has watched me teach.

But the stress of the job is getting to me. And I know there will be people saying 'oo but you get so many holidays!' That maybe so but Im generally in school during them because there is not enough time to get everything done.

I'm going to have to leave a job I love because I can't deal with the pressure. And not the actual teaching but the crap that goes with it!

So miserable tonight! Drinking again!!!!

Bugger.
If you have one foot in the past and one foot in the future you end up weeing on today...focus on today!

Elizabeth41
Posts: 772
Joined: 17 Dec 2011 15:54
Last Drink Date: 17 Dec 2015
Contact:

Re: December General Support and Chat

Post by Elizabeth41 »

Oh dear Bumpydog

Could you take some sick leave? You could have time to think about it before making a life changing decision? I once dated a Math Teacher and he was always under pressure and stressed. (he was so controlling and overweight I nicknamed him 'The Fat Controller').

Maybe you could ask the Head for some help and support?

Offload as much as you like - you won't bore me.

Elizabeth
I drink myself to a place where I don't care but wake up a person who cares enormously :oops:

User avatar
bumpydog
Posts: 1867
Joined: 07 Nov 2008 12:07
Last Drink Date: 18 Nov 2012
Location: Northamptonshire
Contact:

December General Support and Chat

Post by bumpydog »

I took a week off at the end of term.

I know I would be signed off by the doctor!

But the routine would do me good! But the stress wouldn't! I really don't know what to do!

I can't give up my job till I find something else. But the thought of going back is so scary!!!!
If you have one foot in the past and one foot in the future you end up weeing on today...focus on today!

Post Reply