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The Negative Side To Drinking

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Sheila
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The Negative Side To Drinking

Post by Sheila » 18 Dec 2011 20:18

'Positive Things I Notice When I Don't Drink',' is a thread where members post about the benefits they experience in sobriety. To keep the balance, this thread is for discussing the negative side to drinking alcohol, the problems it can cause, and how it affects you.
#4 on the 2020 Challenge
I will not drink again no matter what.

Dab

Re: The Negative Side To Drinking

Post by Dab » 18 Dec 2011 20:43

Thank you for starting this thread Sheila <:)>

As someone currently battling and often 'losing' the battle re sobriety I have found it hard to know where to post on General Recovery on many of the threads which focus on the achievements and benefits of sobriety - well how can I if I am drunk?

However one thing I have learnt over the past two months since my slip became more of a relapse is the many negatives of drinking that when abstinent I tend to distance myself from. Currently I don't find myself battling the EAF as to myself actually being the EAF again.. I need to separate myself from the ''drinking me' once more, the one that doesn't have any dilemma when going to get the bottles / cans in... For a time I had the thought processes regarding keeping sober, challenging myself.

Today I am sober.. Had I gone out I would have bought alcohol and drunk, I'm sure of that. But I can't keep myself locked in my flat indefinitely.. so will write down those negatives I am currently experiencing through drinking again... If I look at them, have them in front of me maybe I will reawake the inner argument again when I want to drink..

I live a lie when I drink.... My 'functioning self' hides all alcohol use from others in the 'real world' both family and friends. I blatantly tell them I am not drinking but go home drink alone, hide the evidence..

I drink to submerge my emotions and block out real life... the problems still remain and my emotions as a result of booze get erratic and unpredictable.

I think about suicide when drinking, the fallout after drinking steers me towards those thoughts also.

Physically I have put on weight through eating unhealthily or not eating and just drinking too much booze.

My skin is terrible.

I have constant dark shadows under my eyes.

I drink whilst taking prescribed medication which increases the effect of booze and impulsiveness and lessens any benefits the medication could give me.

Nerve pain in my legs and feet is so much worse now, and the days after drinking gets increasingly bad.

I hate myself for drinking, I call myself names and am nasty to myself... drinking compounds my lack of self worth.

That's enough for now... hopefully I can get a balance again... start to seperate from the blasted possession of the EAF.. :roll:

Take care all of you here

Dab x

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The Negative Side To Drinking

Post by Jschroeder214 » 19 Dec 2011 02:56

Thanks for sharing, Dab....

One of the most obvious things that I notice when I'm drinking is my struggle to function in my daily life...it's all I can do to get off the couch and go get groceries, and I don't enjoy interacting with my friends and others and avoid doing so if at all possible..I basically just want to "hide" in the house and stay drunk...

I am not currently drinking, which means I'm currently hung over...I'm at work right now, ready to do battle with the EAF, but once I get home, I will most likely have a about 4 or 5 units to put me down for the night.

I so want this roller coaster to end, but I need to get through these holidays without losing my head...

I said on the "cutting down" thread that I was going to make an effort to moderate, leading up to the new year, which at that point, I intend to go completely abstinent until my vacation, a 100 day program of exercise and diet, because I MUST lose 30 pounds before I go.

The point I want to make is, I don't know why I'm doing to myself. I'm 44 years old, but up till a few years ago, always considered myself to be young for my age...this state that I have gotten myself into is turning me into something that I never could have foreseen happening to me a decade ago....I'm turning into a middle-aged drunk..

I have so much to live for, to be thankful for. I don't know why I continue to reach for the bottle when I could be strapping on my rollerblades (yes I still have a pair) or go for a nice long run...my body is still able to perform these activities, as well as lift weights..I know if I continue to drink like I have been drinking, these activities will become impossible, as I'm one of those body types that squirrels away the extra calories....when my "problem" drinking started about 4 years ago, I ballooned from a very reasonable 170 pounds to 220 in about a year:o but through sheer force of will and a ridiculously limited diet, I have gotten back down to 185, but my weight is starting to creep back up again because of, of course, drinking.

I also have a talent for drawing and painting that I am neglecting as well as an interest in scoring and producing electronic music, neither activities I am doing right now, because the alcohol kills the ambition, and feeds a sort of "screw it" attitude, in which i feel that these activities are pointless, as I'm kinda past the age where these talents can be monitized in any significant way...

In short, I'm missing out on my life.

That is the ultimate negative effect of my drinking.

I WILL keep my appointment with my gp this Tuesday, as I HAVE to find out if I am clinically depressed or not..I really don't want to get back on antidepressants, but I'm essentially self medicating with alcohol anyway....

We'll see what happens.
Last edited by Jschroeder214 on 19 Dec 2011 03:58, edited 3 times in total.
There is no fear. There is only choice.

leslans

Re: The Negative Side To Drinking

Post by leslans » 19 Dec 2011 03:25

The negative side to drinking:-

Lost my driving licence 20 years ago. Taking risks again, only a matter of time before caught again

Become aggressive and nasty to people including my most precious beautiful daughter who told me the other day she could not take any more

Live a double life, sneaking alcohol all the time

Turn into a very loud obnoxious slob, swearing, slurring.

I have put tons of weight on and am struggling to control it.

Used to have one night stands and can't even remember who they were or what they even looked like.

Make stupid phone calls at rediculous times of the night

Wet myself and throw up continuously following binges. Stinking of booze the following morning and be told so.

So Alcohol is my friend. I don't think so. This has been a long battle of denial and loathing please god help me. I am a mum and loving wife with two jobs and a lovely home. How I have managed to hold onto that I have no idea. That takes a lot of effort when you look at all I have been through. Surely it wold be easier to walk away from it.

Dab

Re: The Negative Side To Drinking

Post by Dab » 19 Dec 2011 05:50

Hi JS n Franksd <:)>

One thing that hit home on your posts which really has compounded the negative side of drinking is LOSS.

Loss of ambition
Loss of dignity
Loss of health
Loss of self esteem
Loss of our own values once alcohol gets into the picture again.
Loss of hope.

We are not 'social drinkers' or 'safe drinkers' for me maybe I can remain social for a while when drinking, but if I cut to the chase I prefer drinking alone... that way the only person I can hurt is myself.... In the past I was aggressive, violent, anti social and was repeatedely arrested and spent many nights in police cells and hospital due to drinking. I was also at times extremely vulnerable and ending up in awful situations where I was 'the victim' if you like.. I realised that drinking when out is not safe for me... have still done it at times, and most times it has ended badly. But did I stop.. no. .... I drank alone using alcohol ultimately as self medication, to fill a void and escape reality.. has it worked? No it filled me instead with hopelessness and despair.

Alcohol is romantised and advertised so widely.. I read somewhere that if alcohol had just been discovered it would be banned as being as dangerous as a class A drug..

It sucks out the life from in me that is one thing I know...

Take care JS n Franksed... dont give up this battle.. I wont.

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Re: The Negative Side To Drinking

Post by Oldenough2knowbetter » 19 Dec 2011 11:17

I like this thread Dab <:)>

Here's my personal list... in no particular order:

Social avoidance
Wasting money
Self loathing
Despair at not being able to cut down or control intake
Fear over what I was doing to my health
Insomnia/waking up at 4am for the day because I'd fallen asleep on the sofa at 8:30pm the night before
Palpitations
Constant stomach upsets
Wine belly
Puffy face
Putting my need to drink above everything else in my life
"Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think." [Christopher Robin to Pooh]

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Re: The Negative Side To Drinking

Post by PandaGirl » 19 Dec 2011 22:32

I hate the hangovers. The nausea and the headaches.
Heavy drinking nearly always triggers my Crohns to flare up. Anything from mouth ulcers and gastritis to chronic diarrhoea (from the irritation) followed by days of painful constipation (due to the dehydration). Purely because of this, I have gone on less major benders over the last 12 months.
I hate the not knowing what I said/did and the possibility I may have made stuff up or told fantastical stories to people when drunk
The depression the next day
The feeling of FAILURE
I hate it when I go to the shop when I'm sober the next evening and I walk through the city centre and I see people who are drunk and acting like idiots and I know I'm no different - looking at the vacant eyes, the wobbling gait, the slurring and thinking that was me a few hours ago, WTF.
The feeling that I am not the person I was supposed to be, what happened to my life - I'm nearly 30, and how much of it has passed in an alcoholic haze?
It makes me feel I am a weak person, I can't do anything constructive, I lose days, I don't do my studying, I'm fatigued all the time
I am everything my parents are disappointed with - lazy, slack, no discipline, no will to do things.
“In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure.” – Bill Cosby

Dab

Re: The Negative Side To Drinking

Post by Dab » 19 Dec 2011 22:40

Nice to 'meet you' SallyAlley :)

Ditto to above posts..

I have found recently that my memory is so much worse than it had been when abstinent - I mean it was bad then but it is terrible now... I find myself watching films I think I haven't seen, only a part of the way through it realising I had seen some of it before... the next day I have no memory again what film I watched the night before so can easily find myself repeating this a few times..

suppose it saves money on buying new dvd's though ;)

I think I posted a few months ago on the 'positive things I notice when I don't drink' thread that 'instead of having an appalling memory I now just have a bad memory'

this it seems has now been reversed...

hopefully it may go back to 'bad' again with sobriety and I can watch new films again... :)

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Re: The Negative Side To Drinking

Post by Soberlady » 20 Dec 2011 01:20

I read it somewhere but can't remember where..

The best drink of the day is the one you have in your head before you pick up the real one..

For me .. the fantasy one is in a nice long stemmed glass and is very cool and sophisticated..
The real one is a big disappointment.. the reality never lives up to the fantasy..
And it's all down hill from there..

Dacey-x

Just don't pick up the first one.. that's the only one you have to worry about.. ;)?
..when death, the big wind, blows out our birthday candles, only the wish remains..

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Re: The Negative Side To Drinking

Post by mags » 20 Dec 2011 10:28

hi, I haven't been around here much as my son has been studying for exams and has needed to use the computer - needless to say, I didn't want him to see my 'history' as all alkie support lines. I have been reading alot whilst he's at school and unfortunately drinking - secretly- as well.
This seems a really good thread. Whenever I stop drinking, even for a couple of days, I feel soooo much better. The main negative effects for me are -----the feeling of total despair, which is only helped by having another drink, no matter what time of day.
Also, the physical effects for me are horrible.
I feel sick, completely without energy, unable to do anything except stare at a wall and smoke cigs. I have ezcema on my neck and back. Have no inclination to wash or clean my teeth - anything. No appetite. Smoking way too much. Eyes a kind of grey colour. Basically nothing good.
And, what's even worse, I really don't enjoy drinking anymore. I have told myself there's no point in buying nice wine, which I do enjoy, so I buy the cheapest crap and drink it just for the sake of having no withdrawals - or just for the sake of it , I don't know.
Anyway, all I can see is negatives but I keep on doing it.
Good Luck to everyone in this battle - It's not easy, Love Magsx

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Re: The Negative Side To Drinking

Post by Jake. » 20 Dec 2011 17:54

I have previously quit for around 3 months and foolishly started drinking again this month. The festive parties have proved difficult to resist and today I am absolutely shattered and hanging! Am hoping this will remind me of what drinking's like if i'm tempted in the future.

I feel unable to face the world
Reclusive
Paranoid
Shattered
Bloated/fat
Internal Pain
Poor financially
Don't drive cas i' scared i'm over limit the next morning
Poor appetite
Waking up at 5am with soaking bed sheets, how lovely for my partner!
Obnoxious/argumentative/annoying
Do/say things I regret
Hurt my loved ones
Worry about my future
Waste time hidden away indoors
Turn down social events in favour of a drink
Say i'll do things then have no recollection the following day

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Re: The Negative Side To Drinking

Post by london bloke » 20 Dec 2011 21:41

Guilt
Tummy bloated
Worry
Lack of ambition
Lack of hope
Procrastination
Poor self-esteem
Alcohol = Anxiety: I have suffered for years.
Sobriety = Freedom: I have tasted freedom, and I want it more.

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Re: The Negative Side To Drinking

Post by Amber8200 » 20 Dec 2011 23:06

This is a really good thread, it reminds us of the common experiences which no-one who isn't drinking can have any idea of. The negatives like hangovers and problems with driving and spending too much are obvious but it's the more mysterious ones which it is good to reminded about. So many mention extreme negative feelings including suicidal thoughts, even though in other respects our lives might seem good. The feeling of failure, of not being able to do the things you know you are capable of, "missing out on your life" as Jschroeder said, the sense of wanting to hide away so that others can't know where you are in your mind, of not being able to be there for others when they need you, of doing things like making stupid phone calls which make other people hate you.

One of the strangest things for me has been to realise that when I stop drinking for however many days (two or three or four at most usually) and begin to feel really well, physically and mentally, as soon as that stage has been reached, something kicks in which says "You are feeling so good you should celebrate by having a few drinks". Oh, right, as soon as I start not to feel poisoned it's time to put more poison in myself? Where does that come from? I saw a good documentary just the other night which pointed out that alcohol affects several different systems in the brain, the equivalent of four different types of other drugs: tranquillizers (diazepams etc), stimulants (cocaine, amphetamines), anti-depressants (serotonin enhancers) and anaesthetics (knock-out drugs). It's like being addicted to all four at the same time. Is it a wonder that it's so hard to get away from it? This program certainly agreed with you, Dab, that alcohol would certainly be banned as a class A drug if it just was discovered. Problem is, it's now almost universally available, socially endorsed, considered both romantic and exciting, marketed and advertised, makes huge profits, provides Government revenue, thrust upon us at every turn, and then when some of us turn out to have a problem with it, it's all our fault. Not that I'm saying we can't choose to say "No", but when you look at it this way, you can see how truly difficult it is, once people are addicted. And it's passed down between the generations. All the men in my parent's generation were drinkers, maybe even alcoholics, but nobody seemed to notice in those days and they were often dead at forty or fifty anyway. Now it's the women as well, everyone is living much longer (and generally better off so can afford more booze) and the kids are starting at 14 or 15. Well, have got off track a bit here, but just trying to say that starting to think about drinking instead of just doing it really opens up a can of worms. Still, on we go, and we will get there because there is no going back.

Dab

Re: The Negative Side To Drinking

Post by Dab » 21 Dec 2011 21:29

Drinking invariably leaves me feeling like the lowest of the low..

As has said here already I know the negatives of drinking yet get compelled too... why?!

Not much sense coming from me... that's another negative I suppose drinkers invariably earnestly try to say wise and insightful things instead not much sense is spoken..

Finally after the numbness comes impulsiveness, anger, hopelessness and despair and the following morning.... AH THE GUILT..... :(

Addiction is a nonsensical thing.. I felt, despite some lousy physical symptoms and pain, so much better not chugging booze for four days...

hmm

edit: another negative: panicking when the phone goes... Oh God I'm p***ed and I have to put on my 'sober voice'

like I say: hmmmmm :roll:

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Re: The Negative Side To Drinking

Post by LeftPlug » 27 Dec 2011 00:21

For me, the negative side to drinking is forgetting conversations.

A friend says to me "Did I tell you about x?", and I'm not sure if we haven't discussed this, or if we have talked about it and I've forgotten because I blacked it out.

It's a horrible feeling and makes me defensive. Sometimes it might honestly not have been mentioned to me, but I'm not sure and I pretend that we've talked about it.

It makes me a bad friend, because a pal could talk to me about something important and I won't remember the discussion the next morning.

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Re: The Negative Side To Drinking

Post by frozensprouts » 27 Dec 2011 18:24

LeftPlug wrote:For me, the negative side to drinking is forgetting conversations.

A friend says to me "Did I tell you about x?", and I'm not sure if we haven't discussed this, or if we have talked about it and I've forgotten because I blacked it out.

It's a horrible feeling and makes me defensive. Sometimes it might honestly not have been mentioned to me, but I'm not sure and I pretend that we've talked about it.

It makes me a bad friend, because a pal could talk to me about something important and I won't remember the discussion the next morning.
I have found this happens to me all the time whether I was drinking or not.....not sure if it's down to pickled brain cells or old age (I'm only 39 though?!). I laugh about it but I actually find it quite scary as I've always had a good memory
Do you think that you aren’t free? You are free, but you do not know that you are free—and it is your not knowing that you are free that is your limitation and your imprisonment. Realize your freedom, and you are free.

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Re: The Negative Side To Drinking

Post by Candothis » 27 Dec 2011 21:33

Negatives things for me, is facing my children and husband in the morning knowing my husband will tell me everything that happened, and then comes the guilt, checking the phone to see who I called, and not remembering what I have said, please god I can beat this cause it's getting scary now

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Re: The Negative Side To Drinking

Post by TommyFT » 27 Dec 2011 22:39

saw this thread and i just had to make my own list!
The horrible sensation of waking up not knowing what you've done
Weight gain
The shame of being out of control
Wasting all that money
The horrible depression
The look on people's faces when they see you drunk
Having to hide the extent of your drinking from loved ones and friends

I guess I just hate everything about alcohol!!!! ;)?
Alcohol ALWAYS makes things worse, NEVER better

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Re: The Negative Side To Drinking

Post by Rachel » 29 Dec 2011 01:47

Mainly extreme anxiety and depression.
Loss of desire to eat.
Erosion of self esteem which was pretty minimal before I started drinking in my late 20s anyway.
My drinking is medicinal now. I don't enjoy it. I just do it to keep the anxiety down which makes the anxiety go up when I sober up. Stupid huh?
I don't get hangovers, don't do anything worse than maybe slurr a little very occasionally, and I sleep to much.
It's really not worth it, and today it is going to stop. I hope.
Rachel

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Re: The Negative Side To Drinking

Post by london bloke » 29 Dec 2011 14:35

Its a great blog

Thanks SB
Alcohol = Anxiety: I have suffered for years.
Sobriety = Freedom: I have tasted freedom, and I want it more.

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