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And Now For Something Completely Different...

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Boris Bike
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And Now For Something Completely Different...

Post by Boris Bike » 06 Feb 2013 17:53

Suggested by Jo, this is a thread for witty banter, fun and frolics.

There should be no discussion of drink nor sobriety... pretty much everywhere else caters for those needs.

Let your hair down, have a bit of a laugh and a giggle.

If a funny thing happened to you on the way to the Bright Eye forum this is where to tell us about it.

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Re: And Now For Something Completely Different...

Post by Oldenough2knowbetter » 06 Feb 2013 17:58

Joy! Thanks Jo for the idea and thanks Boris for setting it up. Think I'm going to feel at home here :D
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Re: And Now For Something Completely Different...

Post by Topcat » 06 Feb 2013 18:02

Thanks for the idea Jo and thanks Boris for setting it up ;)?
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Re: And Now For Something Completely Different...

Post by George » 06 Feb 2013 18:25

“Now I’m sober and I realize, I didn’t drink to escape the world, I drank to escape myself”
― Phil Volatile, Crushed Black Velvet

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Re: And Now For Something Completely Different...

Post by Boris Bike » 06 Feb 2013 18:26

Shocking news for Jo!

Just seen on the BBC that one school in Teeside is banning its children from saying "nowt" and "yous" along with a list of phrases.

Let's see how long it is before Jo ends up in detention. ;)

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Re: And Now For Something Completely Different...

Post by George » 06 Feb 2013 18:28

Will she get life :?:
“Now I’m sober and I realize, I didn’t drink to escape the world, I drank to escape myself”
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Re: And Now For Something Completely Different...

Post by Oldenough2knowbetter » 06 Feb 2013 18:30

Right, so here is my completely pointless story about orangutans.

Went to Jersey last year and visited the zoo. We were lucky enough to see the orangutans while the keeper was giving a talk. She was telling us about when they introduced Annette, who they had bought from a European zoo, and how they were surprised when Dana, their existing female, immediately rushed over and shared her lunch. The keepers were amazed (apparently Dana doesn't "do" sharing); they seemed to immediately bond. After watching their closeness for a few days, they researched both orangutans' backgrounds and discovered that both Dana and Annette had spent six months together in a German zoo 8 years previous! They clearly remembered each other. All together now... Aah.

The second part of the talk that I loved was about their intelligence. The keeper said that they were all highly intelligent but Bagu, their male, is particularly so. All the orangutans have worked out that if they hand in litter (blown into their enclosure) to the keeper, then they will get a reward. But only Bagu has worked out that if he tears the rubbish into smaller pieces, he will get more rewards.

The zoo announced last month that both Dana and Annette are pregnant (both by Bagu). I very much hope that we'll be able to go back and see the babies.

There... A completely random pointless story that I've wanted to talk about for some time!
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Re: And Now For Something Completely Different...

Post by DannyD » 06 Feb 2013 18:38

I took my daughter to jersey years ago. It was a weekend treat for her as her big sister was on a school away trip (lake como as I remember. Doesn't really compare). We managed jersey zoo, but it was difficult getting her away from the hotel where they had a swimming pool. It would have been cheaper to stay at the local leisure centre.

Jersey for the next meet up?
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Re: And Now For Something Completely Different...

Post by Boris Bike » 06 Feb 2013 18:38

Oldenough2knowbetter wrote:Right, so here is my completely pointless story about orangutans.
That's one of the finer openings to a post I've seen. :lol:

Lovely that they remembered each other as well.

Glad you got the chance to share that. :)

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Re: And Now For Something Completely Different...

Post by smudge » 06 Feb 2013 18:43

Here is a little story I read once. I have no idea if it is true or not.

Three people are standing in queue in a supermarket. The queue is only supposed to be for people with 10 items or fewer. The middle person in the queue has a huge, heaped trolley load of stuff. The person at the back points out the sign to the person with the full trolley who promptly snaps in a loud voice "I CAN READ!". The person at the front of the queue turns round and says "Ah, but can you count?"
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Re: And Now For Something Completely Different...

Post by Oldenough2knowbetter » 06 Feb 2013 18:47

Haha smudge, I like that.

Boris, thank you and Jo for the opportunity... See there really was nowhere else on the forum that I could,have posted that (well not that would have made any sense).

DD, I love Jersey. Really love it. I would adore to retire there (ok so that's 20 years away but hey I like to be prepared) but apparently they only let you in if you're über rich :evil:

Xx
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Re: And Now For Something Completely Different...

Post by George » 06 Feb 2013 18:50

I'm going to have my name changed to Uber Rich - see what they say about that.
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Re: And Now For Something Completely Different...

Post by Boris Bike » 06 Feb 2013 18:56

I have a story slightly related to a zoo.

I went to London Zoo and was bought a rubber shark in the gift shop.

I played with it every bath time and I was very fond of it, with its white underbelly, blue back, ever gaping mouth and fin.

Then I went on holiday with my parents to Butlins and left it in the house where my brother, who was ten years older and didn't want to come, remained behind. My brother liked making Super 8 films on his cine camera.

When I got back, he'd turned my shark into a spaceship! He'd painted it silver and had added tiny cardboard tubes on the sides as missile launchers. For one of his films.

I wasn't very happy. I couldn't play with it in the bath cos of the cardboard bits. And, anyway, my shark just didn't appeal looking like that.

My brother's films were good, though. I got my arm ripped off once. In a film. Not my actual arm.

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Re: And Now For Something Completely Different...

Post by maryj2 » 06 Feb 2013 19:20

Well done for setting up this thread. Great idea, having witty or exciting to share at the mo but want to try and get. The thread bumped
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Re: And Now For Something Completely Different...

Post by Oldenough2knowbetter » 06 Feb 2013 19:41

George wrote:I'm going to have my name changed to Uber Rich - see what they say about that.
(::) (::)
"Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think." [Christopher Robin to Pooh]

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Re: And Now For Something Completely Different...

Post by Oldenough2knowbetter » 06 Feb 2013 19:43

[quote="Boris

My brother's films were good, though. I got my arm ripped off once. In a film. Not my actual arm.[/quote]

Expand please?!
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Re: And Now For Something Completely Different...

Post by DannyD » 06 Feb 2013 20:13

Random thought alert

I quite like sausages, but I lerve chipolatas. I don't understand this, because common sense tells me they're the same thing only different shapes.

Do I need a Freud to explain?
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Re: And Now For Something Completely Different...

Post by behindblueeyes » 06 Feb 2013 20:26

()o I'm not sure even Freud could attempt to explain why you prefer smaller sausages....my favourites are pigs...in blankets of course....
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Re: And Now For Something Completely Different...

Post by DannyD » 06 Feb 2013 20:29

Oh welcome back BBE. I'm laughing.......
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Re: And Now For Something Completely Different...

Post by Boris Bike » 06 Feb 2013 20:34

Oldenough2knowbetter wrote:Expand please?!
I can't really remember any more of the film than that.

I was seated at a desk with my back to the camera. Some sort of monster or alien with a mask on creeps up behind me and tears off my arm (a plasticine model of my arm). And I scream. Although the films were silent, so you could only see my mouth move.

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