Online Alcohol Therapy |  Do you need professional help? |  Alcoholism & Recovery Articles |  Self Help Resources

Personal Goals

New Members thread, SOS thread, Daily chat and Support, Cutting Down, Abstinence and more.
User avatar
Sheila
Posts: 15714
Joined: 09 Jan 2009 16:09
Last Drink Date: 16 Aug 2018
First Sober Date: 17 Aug 2018
Location: Sussex UK
Contact:

Personal Goals

Post by Sheila » 30 Mar 2015 07:00

Not everyone wants to or feels the need to abstain completely. At the request of some members, and as an alternative to the Sobriety Challenges, this thread offers a place where members are free to define their own goals with regard to drinking. Whether it's a 6:1, 5:2, 4:3 ratio of sober days to drinking days, or any other goal, this is the place to declare it and then set out to achieve it in the company of your peers. We hope you find this thread useful.
#4 on the 2019 Challenge
I drank to get drunk and I no longer need to inflict that on myself.

User avatar
kath
Posts: 2689
Joined: 22 Feb 2015 12:58
Last Drink Date: 21 Feb 2015
First Sober Date: 28 Jan 2017
Location: uk
Contact:

Re: Personal Goals

Post by kath » 30 Mar 2015 08:00

Thank you Sheila.
my goal is 5/2 so no drinking for me till Friday. It's going to be a tough one. The kids are off so makes me feel like I'm on holiday even though I'm not. Here we go day one of 5.
one day or day one.

Hopefullee
Posts: 740
Joined: 20 Feb 2015 15:06
Contact:

Re: Personal Goals

Post by Hopefullee » 30 Mar 2015 11:01

Hi Kath
Im on 5/2 this week also...day 1 for me (horrendous sunday :( )
x

User avatar
Jaded
Posts: 1325
Joined: 21 Jan 2013 16:25
Last Drink Date: 17 Nov 2017
Location: USA
Contact:

Re: Personal Goals

Post by Jaded » 30 Mar 2015 12:09

Hi you guys!

I had a heck of a time finding this thread---for some reason I was looking for something called "5/2" or similar...I don't know why!

My personal goal is to be Mostly Sober (I know, I know---I'm on the wrong thread again :? ) So, right now I'm working through being sober 1 day at a time (....or hour ....or minute :evil: ). I'm still on the challenge threads (although it's spookily quiet in the 3 week)

In the end though, I want to be like Slingy :o :mrgreen: Slingy is Mostly Sober and occasionally will have a night on the town so to speak, but then jumps right back on the BE wagon.

When you guys say your goal is 5/2, do you have specifics in mind? Like what days will you drink? Saturday and Tuesday? How did you come up with those days? Why 5/2 and not 6/1 or 3/4? Do you have different days every week that you will drink or is it Every Saturday and Every Tuesday? What will you do to help yourself stay away from the "what the heck, might as well have one, I've already drank yesterday" kind of thinking?

As you can see, I like to have a firm plan in place :lol: Plus, I'm just super nosy.

Jaded
.
“Anything worth doing is worth doing poorly until you can do it better" -- Zig Ziglar

User avatar
Naughty little newt
Posts: 9895
Joined: 25 Jun 2013 12:40
Last Drink Date: 10 Aug 2014
Location: The pond
Contact:

Re: Personal Goals

Post by Naughty little newt » 30 Mar 2015 13:00

Good luck everyone ;)? I failed miserably on this venture, I was either drunk or withdrawing and for me (and we are all different, except Slingy who is very different :lol: ) left me in a life of not knowing my arse from my elbow and took me years to accept that this just wasn't for me.

Slingy shows a self control far beyond anything I could do and manages very long AF spells between his night out on the razz, you got to give the man credit, over six months off, goes on holiday, comes back and starts another long spell!

I will drink with my Father in valhalla that's for sure, I will be having my fun fiftieth next year too :roll: we have a running joke at home that that's relapse material in it's self but if (and this is a big if) I did drink on my birthday it would spoil me being two years AF and I've made some big life changes along with stopping drinking this time round, as in living alone and quitting my stressful enough to drive a man to drink job, all for the good of me having a better life and also my loved ones.

I am a big believer in the saying "there is no substitute for experience" so what you are doing is nothing to be frowned upon and we'll never know until we try, once again I wished for years I could do it and boy did I try, but in the end I couldn't. :D

User avatar
kath
Posts: 2689
Joined: 22 Feb 2015 12:58
Last Drink Date: 21 Feb 2015
First Sober Date: 28 Jan 2017
Location: uk
Contact:

Re: Personal Goals

Post by kath » 30 Mar 2015 15:19

Hope sorry you are having a bad day one. Great to see you and i will be your wingman so let me know when you are struggling. Xx
Hi Jaded. You ask more questions than my 3 year old haha!! I did manage to out why? Her the other day tho. It was a great victory haha.
so, i can only speak for myself but my plan is to drink on Fridays and Sat or Sunday but not both. My plans to stop it turning into a 5 day bender is pretty much the same method people use in every trial. Be strict, plan things to take your mind of it and the one that works well for me, eating my body weight in cake each evening haha!
last week was great for me. I stuck to drinking on a Friday and Sunday and because it was just the two days and not a run, i haven't got any hangover it was a very successful week! I hope this week will be the same. Oh i have also, rather stupidly, signed up for a half marathon. So when my husband suggested we drank on Saturday night, i knew i had to do a long run on Sunday so it helped me say no. I signed up for it purposely to help me drink less.
well done for getting to the 3 week thread!!! That's great.

Slinky seems to of got it all sorted. That's great.

NLNewt
if you have gone sooo long without alcohol i don't know if i would risk undoing it all for 1 night, but that is something only you can decide.

Happy sober Monday everyone. Xxx
one day or day one.

Hopefullee
Posts: 740
Joined: 20 Feb 2015 15:06
Contact:

Re: Personal Goals

Post by Hopefullee » 30 Mar 2015 17:28

Thanks Kath, appreciated <:)> Same goes for you.
Not good place yesterday and feeling rather shamefaced about it all today, although somehow I did manage to stop before I got totally obliterated, I guess that's something!

Jaded and Newt...hi. Im very much finding my way at the moment. The one thing I am clear about however is my drinking cannot continue on the level it has been, it is not an option.
I managed 7 days AF last week, which I am really pleased about, but rather fell off the wagon yesterday. Don't ask me why? No idea, but posted ridiculous stuff on here which I feel awful about.
I may be deluding myself, but I am still hoping that I can beat this without going totally AF, so Im setting myself a goal each week of AF days to complete, as many as possible, the idea being that will allow me to have a drink with friends, but cut out the solo bingeing and get my head back into the sober is good mindset. This week, I have 2 nights which might possibly include alcohol, weds and thurs. So my realistic goal is 5 AF days in the next 7. I am not telling myself drink on those days, but I know that they will be social occasions where my friends will be drinking (but not to excess) and it is likely I will have a drink.

At the moment I am feeling very wobbly and uncertain, so 1 day at a time, but I am commited to doing this. It may be that even occasional drinking is no longer an option for me, but call it cowardice or whatever, Im not quite ready to face up to that one yet.

So heres to us staying mainly sober...good luck everyone :D x

User avatar
kath
Posts: 2689
Joined: 22 Feb 2015 12:58
Last Drink Date: 21 Feb 2015
First Sober Date: 28 Jan 2017
Location: uk
Contact:

Re: Personal Goals

Post by kath » 30 Mar 2015 19:08

Hope please don't worry about your posts yesterday!!!
Be strong today and eat lots. Watch some good tv and relax. Tomorrow will be a better day xx
one day or day one.

Hopefullee
Posts: 740
Joined: 20 Feb 2015 15:06
Contact:

Re: Personal Goals

Post by Hopefullee » 30 Mar 2015 19:42

Thanks Kath :)
Yep I am settling down to watch a film with my kids, and then an early night (also have an early easter egg to demolish if I start getting twitchy lol!) Think tonight will be safe...phew!!!
Hope its going ok for you ?...day 2 here we come (::) xx

User avatar
kath
Posts: 2689
Joined: 22 Feb 2015 12:58
Last Drink Date: 21 Feb 2015
First Sober Date: 28 Jan 2017
Location: uk
Contact:

Re: Personal Goals

Post by kath » 30 Mar 2015 19:50

Yes thank you Hope. I am feeling good and strong today. If only it would last the whole week. X
one day or day one.

soberfun
Posts: 1152
Joined: 19 Mar 2012 14:33
Contact:

Re: Personal Goals

Post by soberfun » 30 Mar 2015 21:17

Hi everyone. I have just seen this thread and I think it will be really helpful as I don't want to give up altogether.
I would like to challenge myself to 4/3 that is 4 days AF. Today is day one and I have had one pint of beer. I won't have any more as there aren't any in the house. I know I will be going out one night this week. At least this way I can succeed at something. Good luck everyone. ;)?

User avatar
kath
Posts: 2689
Joined: 22 Feb 2015 12:58
Last Drink Date: 21 Feb 2015
First Sober Date: 28 Jan 2017
Location: uk
Contact:

Re: Personal Goals

Post by kath » 30 Mar 2015 21:27

Hi soberfun
Great to have you join us. Good luck with you 4 days. :D
one day or day one.

soberfun
Posts: 1152
Joined: 19 Mar 2012 14:33
Contact:

Re: Personal Goals

Post by soberfun » 30 Mar 2015 21:59

Thank you Kath. Good luck with your running. That will keep you busy. :D

User avatar
want2bhealthy
Posts: 1630
Joined: 21 Sep 2013 22:26
Location: Northeastern US
Contact:

Re: Personal Goals

Post by want2bhealthy » 31 Mar 2015 01:52

Hi everyone,
I really hope this thread takes off. I think it is a good stepping stone for a lot people that come to BE and are not ready or not really interested in complete abstinence. It would be nice if this forum could compare with the popularity and support you get over on the 7 day or longer challenges while allowing individuals to choose their own goals.

Day 2 of who knows how many days but aiming high!

Best wishes to all who are starting their journey here this week.
It begins in chilhood as a deep insecurity and the alcohol itself is the medicine to that insecurity. Without it most alcoholics are easily identifiable because they simply don't know how to operate.

User avatar
want2bhealthy
Posts: 1630
Joined: 21 Sep 2013 22:26
Location: Northeastern US
Contact:

Re: Personal Goals

Post by want2bhealthy » 31 Mar 2015 01:56

BTW who let that Naughty Newt over here ;) I fear the conversation might get a bit punny on this thread.

Maybe his good buddy Slingy will make an appearance as well! Now that will be a party!
It begins in chilhood as a deep insecurity and the alcohol itself is the medicine to that insecurity. Without it most alcoholics are easily identifiable because they simply don't know how to operate.

User avatar
kath
Posts: 2689
Joined: 22 Feb 2015 12:58
Last Drink Date: 21 Feb 2015
First Sober Date: 28 Jan 2017
Location: uk
Contact:

Re: Personal Goals

Post by kath » 31 Mar 2015 07:35

Good morning
day 2 here and feel good.
w2bh i hope it takes off too. Keep popping by.
sober fun, hope your feeling good today.
Hope good morning lets rack up another af day.
newt, good morning to you.
Hello to Rags if your about.

Are you doing you drinking chart? I am and it's good seeing lots of af days on it. It's a good way to watch your progress.

have a nice day everyone xx
one day or day one.

Hopefullee
Posts: 740
Joined: 20 Feb 2015 15:06
Contact:

Re: Personal Goals

Post by Hopefullee » 31 Mar 2015 08:32

Morning All :)
That chart sounds like a brill idea Kath! Will get my colouring pencils out.
Day 2 here we go, good luck everyone.
Working today but will pop back later
xx

User avatar
want2bhealthy
Posts: 1630
Joined: 21 Sep 2013 22:26
Location: Northeastern US
Contact:

Re: Personal Goals

Post by want2bhealthy » 31 Mar 2015 11:48

Hi Guys,
Morning of day 3! Feeling good other than exhausted from crossfit last night.
Kath and Hopefullee do you guys know of the online drinking diary? A lot of people who were struggling at times on the 7 day use it to track their progress. When you feel bad because of a slip just pull it out and look at all those sober days you have racked up. Twenty six out of thirty days is pretty good IMHO and it really keeps you motivated after a slip to jump back in and rack up those teal squares. Here is the link:
http://www.drinkingdiary.com/index.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Hi Soberfun! I remember you from the 7 day. I hope you find this a better fit over here!

Onward and upward!
It begins in chilhood as a deep insecurity and the alcohol itself is the medicine to that insecurity. Without it most alcoholics are easily identifiable because they simply don't know how to operate.

User avatar
Naughty little newt
Posts: 9895
Joined: 25 Jun 2013 12:40
Last Drink Date: 10 Aug 2014
Location: The pond
Contact:

Re: Personal Goals

Post by Naughty little newt » 31 Mar 2015 13:37

want2bhealthy wrote:BTW who let that Naughty Newt over here ;) I fear the conversation might get a bit punny on this thread.

Maybe his good buddy Slingy will make an appearance as well! Now that will be a party!

I've been hired as a bouncer ;)? as for Slingy, his name's not down so he's not coming in! :lol:

Here's something I used a lot for a while, it's hard to keep track sometimes of what you've had but it's a great way to calculate what you would think is wise to allow yourself and proves to be a good little eye opener on what size your next jeans could be!


:D

User avatar
Jaded
Posts: 1325
Joined: 21 Jan 2013 16:25
Last Drink Date: 17 Nov 2017
Location: USA
Contact:

Re: Personal Goals

Post by Jaded » 31 Mar 2015 14:40

Glad to see you guys have some good goals in place ;)? I think if you keep posting on here so you are accountable, it should work out well!

This place is awesome -- even has it's own Naughty Bouncer to keep out the riff-raff, now THAT is fancy \:)/

I think I'm still in denial about abstinence. The sober days are getting easier with practice though, so I feel like I am making progress. Sometimes I'm a bit slow to catch on :lol:

Newt, that link was terrible (kidding..sort of :lol: ) Apparently every time I drink it is a big red binge and if 3000 calories = 1 pound gained, I will gain like 520 pounds in the next 10 years if I keep drinking :o :o :o

Anyway, just stopped in to say Howdy and keep it going guys <:)>

Jaded
.
“Anything worth doing is worth doing poorly until you can do it better" -- Zig Ziglar

Post Reply