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successful cutting down?

Any tips or advice to prevent a relapse, alternatively any of your stories about your own relapses.
Bluebottle
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Re: successful cutting down?

Post by Bluebottle » 06 Jan 2020 20:57

Thanks for your advice Sally, I do try to stay under a bottle of wine, which I don't consider a binge, :? unfortunately I don't always manage that. I may be wrong but not having hard and fast rules seems to help, ie I don't get those fcuk moments as I can drink as much as I want when I want but I choose not to most of the time. I also try not to drink more than once a week and usually much less often. I mostly drink to be sociable and not to cope with stress and I'm totally out of the habit of drinking at home/out of boredom.

Thanks for your reply the who, it's nice to know that someone else is succeeding with moderation, I certainly have to work at it and my limits are quite a bit higher than yours but 90% of the time I'm happy with my drinking. 2 years ago I had almost 6 months af before I reintroduced and I still feel it's a learning curve. Sorry to hear about your dad but sometimes it takes a wake-up call like you described to make a change. Good luck for the future. Mines was a psychiatrist saying I was daily dependent, which isn't true but he threatened my driver's licence which forced me to address the issue.

Ruby xx
When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.
352/12 days - sober/drinking (14 April 2018 - 13 April 2019)
307/59 days - 2019/2020

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SoberBoots
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Re: successful cutting down?

Post by SoberBoots » 07 Jan 2020 10:54

didnt really want to be on the earth for most of my drinking career.
That so resonated with me. I really didn't understand what a corrosive effect alcohol can have on your mental health until I'd stopped, knew it was for good (as far as an addict can ever say such a thing), and had been sober for quite a long while. It was affecting me much more than I realised, even in the years when I was on, the surface, moderating fairly successfully. I have to accept that my wellbeing doesn't come naturally to me, for complicated reasons - I will always have to pay it attention. The days when I used to take a drink to "cope" with stress, and an anti-depressant or mood stabiliser on the same day, seem like a madness to me now - what a waste of prescribed medication! My mental health isn't perfect now and there'll always be times when I struggle, but it's a good 80% better than in my heavy drinking days, plus I have the satisfaction of discovering better coping skills and nurturing some growing resilience.

Moira, sounds like you're in a good place at the mo. I know you think about this a lot, review and reflection's so important.
The best time to plant a tree was 30 years ago. The second best time is today.

Bluebottle
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Re: successful cutting down?

Post by Bluebottle » 14 Jan 2020 22:55

I am thanks Sally., I'm back at my volunteering and going to the gym.

Had a hot date for Thursday and what happens, my veneer came off and I can't get a dentist appointment till Monday. Had to cancel, not sure if he's talking to me now. Oh well plenty more fish in the sea. ;)?

Ruby xx
When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.
352/12 days - sober/drinking (14 April 2018 - 13 April 2019)
307/59 days - 2019/2020

Bluebottle
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Re: successful cutting down?

Post by Bluebottle » 31 Jan 2020 23:07

Really pleased with myself. \:)/ had planned to go to a ceilidh tonight, it was a BYOB but I didn't fancy it and instead I stayed in sober. In the past I would create events as an excuse to drink but I plan to drink next week at my sister's and decided twice in a week was too much. Simple things. :mrgreen:

Ruby xx
When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.
352/12 days - sober/drinking (14 April 2018 - 13 April 2019)
307/59 days - 2019/2020

Bluebottle
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Re: successful cutting down?

Post by Bluebottle » 03 Feb 2020 23:46

I think I've discovered something I like more than alcohol, exercise. ;)? Planning on drinking tomorrow night but I've decided not to go overboard as I want to get up early and run the next day. Tomorrow will be the proof of the pudding, wish me luck. 8-)

Ruby xx
When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.
352/12 days - sober/drinking (14 April 2018 - 13 April 2019)
307/59 days - 2019/2020

martha
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Re: successful cutting down?

Post by martha » 04 Feb 2020 07:09

That's great, Ruby! Exercise was a MASSIVE help to me in the summer months. I started a particular class in the evenings (every evening!) as a distraction from alcohol thoughts, but ended up really prioritising exercise and not wanting to drink in case it ruined next day's exercise. Who knew?! :lol: I'm struggling at the moment with exercise either before or after work. I'm blaming the cold, dark winter weather :roll: :twisted:
Waiting for bunnies to appear in the fields.

Bluebottle
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Re: successful cutting down?

Post by Bluebottle » 04 Feb 2020 09:55

Thanks Martha, I've mostly been going to gym classes, much easier to motivate myself to go because it's booked, I'm at my sister's for a few days so have to run outside, least the forecast is good. I find it easier once I changed into my gym kit, then I've got no excuse not to go. ;)? I've also been doing yoga on YouTube, love it, just hope I can sustain this amount of enthusiasm. ;)?

Ruby xx
When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.
352/12 days - sober/drinking (14 April 2018 - 13 April 2019)
307/59 days - 2019/2020

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SoberBoots
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Re: successful cutting down?

Post by SoberBoots » 04 Feb 2020 10:27

Ruby&Tilly wrote:
31 Jan 2020 23:07
Really pleased with myself. \:)/ had planned to go to a ceilidh tonight, it was a BYOB but I didn't fancy it and instead I stayed in sober. In the past I would create events as an excuse to drink but I plan to drink next week at my sister's and decided twice in a week was too much. Simple things. :mrgreen:

Ruby xx
Awesome Ruby, and well done with all the exercise!
The best time to plant a tree was 30 years ago. The second best time is today.

Bluebottle
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Re: successful cutting down?

Post by Bluebottle » 04 Feb 2020 22:02

Cheers Sally and Martha, I had a few drinks tonight but managed to stop with about 3/4 left in the bottle, pity it was a litre of rum. :D , only kidding, drank about 6 units. When my sister suggested a cup of coffee I agreed, now that's a first. :o

I know lots of other people have talked about being 'cured' after long periods of abstinence and then coming unstuck but I do think something's changed in me. I hope I'm not delusional and I know I will still have to be vigilant in the future but I'm quite optimistic. ;)?

Ruby xx

PS felt quite pissed on 6 units, which is a good sign. 8-)
When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.
352/12 days - sober/drinking (14 April 2018 - 13 April 2019)
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Bluebottle
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Re: successful cutting down?

Post by Bluebottle » 14 Feb 2020 03:33

It's a big weekend for me this week, got a date tomorrow night but hoping to keep within my limits of a bottle of wine. :D

Saturday I have lunch with the girls for a friend's birthday, I'm planning to drink during the meal but stop when we leave the pub a couple of hours later. Haven't done that in a long time, hope the ww doesn't get hold of me.

I've written it down, just need to stick to it. :?

Ruby xx
When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.
352/12 days - sober/drinking (14 April 2018 - 13 April 2019)
307/59 days - 2019/2020

martha
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Re: successful cutting down?

Post by martha » 14 Feb 2020 06:04

Good luck Ruby and enjoy!
Waiting for bunnies to appear in the fields.

Bluebottle
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Re: successful cutting down?

Post by Bluebottle » 14 Feb 2020 11:48

Cheers Martha. Hope you are well and not struggling with those pesky permission thoughts. ;)?
When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.
352/12 days - sober/drinking (14 April 2018 - 13 April 2019)
307/59 days - 2019/2020

martha
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Re: successful cutting down?

Post by martha » 14 Feb 2020 12:40

Ruby&Tilly wrote:
14 Feb 2020 11:48
Cheers Martha. Hope you are well and not struggling with those pesky permission thoughts. ;)?
No, I'm all good today 😎
Waiting for bunnies to appear in the fields.

Bluebottle
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Re: successful cutting down?

Post by Bluebottle » 16 Feb 2020 01:14

I reckon I've got about 8 weeks till the end of my year (my 300 days AF), and today I'm on day 260, so that's about 16 drinking days left. Hopefully I'll manage that, I'm finding it easier and easier to moderate. I think I've climbed up that slippery slope quite a bit, I'll probably never be a normal drinker but so far so good.

I would just like to thank everyone on this site and Tobin for all the advice (even if I didn't take it) and honesty. ;)?
I was a total mess 2 years ago when I started this journey but I do think my relationship with alcohol has changed. I plan to keep that bottle of wine in the kitchen as a test to prove that I'm strong enough to not drink it.

Ruby xx
When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.
352/12 days - sober/drinking (14 April 2018 - 13 April 2019)
307/59 days - 2019/2020

Bluebottle
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Re: successful cutting down?

Post by Bluebottle » 24 Feb 2020 02:02

Well the bottle of wine didn't last long but there's still a glass left. :oops:

Been out with my blind date twice now, the first time I drank a bit too much but also drank sodas. Tonight I discovered my off button and had about 5 units. I was just nice and merry.

I quite like this guy, so don't want to blow it by getting legless, I was a bit worried about his drinking at first but I'm sure he can take it or leave it, he's ex army, so he's used to a heavy drinking culture but tonight he only had a few. We're both keen on the cinema and it cost less than a fiver for the 2 of us, hoping to go again next week.

Ruby xx

PS, sorry for my ramblings, canny sleep again!
When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.
352/12 days - sober/drinking (14 April 2018 - 13 April 2019)
307/59 days - 2019/2020

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