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The Confession Parlour...

Any tips or advice to prevent a relapse, alternatively any of your stories about your own relapses.
Spats
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Re: The Confession Parlour...

Post by Spats » 07 May 2018 21:20

Bit like that at the weekend. Saw someone in the supermarket with bottle of Jura whisky in their basket and thought I’d really love one of those, followed by cigarette cravings. Cigarettes I thought no they’re disgusting, can’t stand the taste but alcohol ..... ! Didn’t cave though ()o

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Newt
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Re: The Confession Parlour...

Post by Newt » 17 Jun 2018 09:13

You are going to meet a tall, dark stranger :shock:
Chin up and brew up

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Re: The Confession Parlour...

Post by Lush4life » 17 Jun 2018 09:50

Naughty little newt wrote:You are going to meet a tall, dark stranger :shock:
Or someone short, fair and familiar ;)
Sobriety is never owned ; it's rented
And rent is due Every day.

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Re: The Confession Parlour...

Post by Newt » 17 Jun 2018 09:52

:lol:
Chin up and brew up

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Re: The Confession Parlour...

Post by Newt » 17 Jun 2018 10:05

Could do with a shave! :?
Chin up and brew up

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Re: The Confession Parlour...

Post by Newt » 17 Jun 2018 10:12

You are quick mate ;)?


Much better :D
Chin up and brew up

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Re: The Confession Parlour...

Post by Spats » 17 Jun 2018 21:46

Needs to go on a diet :?

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Re: The Confession Parlour...

Post by Spats » 19 Jul 2018 14:47

Confessing...... that I had a drink on Tuesday night ..... but it didn’t stop at one ..... it was two ..... bottles of wine :oops: (w) :|

I was going to just disappear for a short break but then I’m on holiday a week on Saturday for two weeks and after that relapse (I’d achieved my best record ever .. 18 days) I’m not sure if I can do all that time AF. So perhaps I’ll take that break and just go easy on myself and stay mostly sober. Restrict my drinking to one bottle a week (once it’s opened it’s gone).

What made me drink - I told myself I could and I will, simple as that. Trouble was I really felt hungover yesterday, and bad tummy. Not had that for a long time. And I cried off work yesterday. What made me ‘fess up - i lost 1 1/2lbs this week. But I barely ate anything that night. Apart from rubbish.

Done ✅ I’m back on 7days and I will stick to it until I get off that plane. ;)

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Re: The Confession Parlour...

Post by SoberBoots » 19 Jul 2018 16:37

Spats wrote:
19 Jul 2018 14:47
Confessing...... that I had a drink on Tuesday night ..... but it didn’t stop at one ..... it was two ..... bottles of wine :oops: (w) :|

I was going to just disappear for a short break but then I’m on holiday a week on Saturday for two weeks and after that relapse (I’d achieved my best record ever .. 18 days) I’m not sure if I can do all that time AF. So perhaps I’ll take that break and just go easy on myself and stay mostly sober. Restrict my drinking to one bottle a week (once it’s opened it’s gone).

What made me drink - I told myself I could and I will, simple as that. Trouble was I really felt hungover yesterday, and bad tummy. Not had that for a long time. And I cried off work yesterday. What made me ‘fess up - i lost 1 1/2lbs this week. But I barely ate anything that night. Apart from rubbish.

Done ✅ I’m back on 7days and I will stick to it until I get off that plane. ;)
Recommended reading for you over on the Road to Abstinence thread today - some helpful thoughts.
You have a great achievement in your 18 days, and some new tools which clearly help. Maybe need to work on teasing out the AV as it sounds like that got the better of you this time (but it doesn't mean it always will)
The best time to plant a tree was 30 years ago. The second best time is today.

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Re: The Confession Parlour...

Post by Spats » 19 Jul 2018 18:43

I read some of that Sally. I think I need to reread, and perhaps go back to read some of the earlier posts. I’m certainly not giving up I know I can do it but I don’t think It registered with me just how hard it was going to be.

Thanks for all your support as always (::)

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Re: The Confession Parlour...

Post by SoberBoots » 19 Jul 2018 19:08

Spats wrote:
19 Jul 2018 18:43
I read some of that Sally. I think I need to reread, and perhaps go back to read some of the earlier posts. I’m certainly not giving up I know I can do it but I don’t think It registered with me just how hard it was going to be.

Thanks for all your support as always (::)
It's a tough realisation that you can't flirt with it, you have to do it. You have done really, really well. Haven't you got your alcohol service appt this week, or have I got that wrong?
The best time to plant a tree was 30 years ago. The second best time is today.

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Re: The Confession Parlour...

Post by Spats » 19 Jul 2018 21:18

Monday morning so I will be AF then. Good day today ;)?

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Re: The Confession Parlour...

Post by pab006 » 24 Jul 2018 09:34

Hi All,

I have hit rock bottom :( I was AF for a month but relapsed last night. My partner found out, and is now not returning my messages or calls. I was already in the last chance saloon, so may have just drank away a twenty year relationship. I have just admitted to my parents that I have a problem, not a pleasant conversation. Anyway I am reaching out as I'm in a bad place at the moment.

Thankyou for reading.

Paul

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Re: The Confession Parlour...

Post by Jjjj of Old » 24 Jul 2018 09:52

Hi Paul. I'm really sorry to hear that. It's not a good situation to find yourself in, sorry. You'll be feeling terrible, I know, and the temptation might be to drink away your sorrows and worries. But please don't. That will only make things worse. The best advice I can give is to stay sober - you'll handle problems better that way. Look too to the future - what has happened, has already happened. If it's rock bottom, things really can only improve. You may not be able to sort all the problems as soon as you'd like, or in quite the way you'd like, but you can certainly begin to turn some things around.

Stick around the forum, and post wherever you find helpful.

Very best wishes,
Mark
"Addiction doesn’t go away when we stop drinking." ~ Tai

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Re: The Confession Parlour...

Post by Sandy » 24 Jul 2018 11:21

we are all here to help Paul

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Re: The Confession Parlour...

Post by pab006 » 24 Jul 2018 11:28

Hi,

Thanks Mark I appreciate your words, and you are very right. It is very tempting to blast myself to oblivion and forget for a little while. Thankfully I am not at home so that isn't an option. I have just spoke to a chap from AA who for the first time from all the people I have spoken with A: been there done that and has more t-shirts than I do and B: actually gets where I am coming from. MY first meeting is tomorrow.

Not sure what will happen or if a can mend the bridge with my partner. As you say the past is the past and the future is tomorrow. Thanks again for your help and response. I am only just realising now the battle that I have to face. Hats off to those that have already won, but also hats off to those that are about to or are going through it. This is my first step. For those that are reading this, any advice is more than welcome, and for those like me that are at this stage of their journey, I look forward to walking it with you.

In keeping with the thread, if you are here, then like me you had a slip. You aren't alone because I slipped too! Perhaps together we can prop each other up and aim to not slip again.

Thankyou again.
Paul

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Re: The Confession Parlour...

Post by DannyD » 24 Jul 2018 11:45

Morning Paul

The best advice I can give, is to do it for yourself. Not because a relationship has gone badly (sorry to hear that), not because (for example) you’ve lost your job, but because you want to, and can see a benefit in staying sober. And when triggers try and temptation kicks in, remember how lovely it is to wake up sober.

Good luck
be selfish in your sobriety.

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Re: The Confession Parlour...

Post by SoberBoots » 24 Jul 2018 23:01

pab006 wrote:
24 Jul 2018 09:34
Hi All,

I have hit rock bottom :( I was AF for a month but relapsed last night. My partner found out, and is now not returning my messages or calls. I was already in the last chance saloon, so may have just drank away a twenty year relationship. I have just admitted to my parents that I have a problem, not a pleasant conversation. Anyway I am reaching out as I'm in a bad place at the moment.

Thankyou for reading.

Paul
Hey Paul, welcome aboard. I think you'll find a great deal of empathy here. Reaching out for help is such a crucial first step, and yet it seems so very hard to do. You've done well to do as you have, contacting AA and coming on here. I don't mean to diminsh the problems you have, but if you can stay sober things are so much more copeable with. A month sober is great! In the course of my long struggle with the bastard alcohol, I used to find though that if I did a spall sober the permission thoughts would sneak in 'you've done well, so you deserve a drink' ' you've shown you've got it under control, you can drink moderately now' etc. Very soon I'd be back at my worst, as if I'd climbed well up the ladder only to slide back down the snake! I had my wake-up call last year and joined BE the same day - it was difficult dealing with all the withdrawal and so on but the sober life is infinitely preferable and worth working for. If today's your rock bottom then you have everything to look forward to. I'll look forward to seeing you about on the threads.
The best time to plant a tree was 30 years ago. The second best time is today.

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Re: The Confession Parlour...

Post by White Goodman » 28 Sep 2018 19:34

Sorry to hear about that Paul. I am 10 days sober currently but my wife is on the verge of leaving anyway. I've let her down too often , so I understand how you feel.

We've been together a similar amount of time to you and it's utterly heartbreaking.

Chin up and try not to hit the bottle, I'm resisting currently , it has to be the right thing to do.

The funny thing is, we all think that alcohol is SUCH an important thing in our lives but when your wife suddenly says I can't do this anymore, it's like a horse kicking you in the stomach and you suddenly realise quite how pernicious and vile a substance it is.

I hope you can make a go of fixing things with your partner.

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Re: The Confession Parlour...

Post by SoberBoots » 28 Sep 2018 20:40

White Goodman wrote:
28 Sep 2018 19:34
Sorry to hear about that Paul. I am 10 days sober currently but my wife is on the verge of leaving anyway. I've let her down too often , so I understand how you feel.

We've been together a similar amount of time to you and it's utterly heartbreaking.

Chin up and try not to hit the bottle, I'm resisting currently , it has to be the right thing to do.

The funny thing is, we all think that alcohol is SUCH an important thing in our lives but when your wife suddenly says I can't do this anymore, it's like a horse kicking you in the stomach and you suddenly realise quite how pernicious and vile a substance it is.

I hope you can make a go of fixing things with your partner.
Welcome aboard White Goodman. Very tough times, eh? Married or single, you need to see alcohol as what it is, a false friend and a deadly enemy. Please stick around, get support from us lot, and start putting your life back together.
The best time to plant a tree was 30 years ago. The second best time is today.

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