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What's a Relapse?

Any tips or advice to prevent a relapse, alternatively any of your stories about your own relapses.
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tee
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Re: what's a relapse?

Post by tee » 24 Mar 2010 13:45

Meh, I'm just no long out the shower Andy. Wine gums tho, am thinking they may help. I may just manage to drap my carcass out to the shop after all :oops:
Perseverance is not a long race, it is a series of short races one after the other.

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Andy
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Re: what's a relapse?

Post by Andy » 24 Mar 2010 13:57

Bit of fresh air is always good :-), unless the weather your way is like it is here :-(
Journey started 22-Feb-10.

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tee
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Re: what's a relapse?

Post by tee » 24 Mar 2010 23:15

Well, the diet's out the window :roll: I couldn't go out. So I stayed in and munched chocolate, crisps and cake :oops: But I did not drink, or smoke, so no relapsing here :D I'm taking my grumpy carcasse off to bed now so hopfully normal service will be resumed tomorrow. As in positive cheerleading. Ba humbug...
Perseverance is not a long race, it is a series of short races one after the other.

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Re: what's a relapse?

Post by Andy » 25 Mar 2010 06:53

15 Stone 9 3/4lb today

Strange as I didnt weigh in yesterday I weighd last night and it was 15 Stone 13 1/4, definately bed seem to be the place to loose weight :-)

No wonder that lasy OH of mine only weighs about 7 Stone ;-)

Andy, Good luck today everyone :-)
Journey started 22-Feb-10.

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tee
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Re: what's a relapse?

Post by tee » 25 Mar 2010 16:59

Big relapsing of the diet variety continuing today :roll: but i won't post in that thread in case I'm a bad influence :oops:

2 packets of crisps, a creme egg and a family size bag of wine gums so far, I don't do things by halves do I! At least my face isnae tripping me the day, not sure what that was all about :? but am happy to report no crying for no apparent reason going on today :P Sorry folks for being a whinge yesterday, I don't know what goes on in this noggin of mine sometimes!

Love
Tee ;)
Perseverance is not a long race, it is a series of short races one after the other.

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Andy
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Re: what's a relapse?

Post by Andy » 25 Mar 2010 17:09

Ah, Now I know what happened to my post this morning, I thought I'd posted in the Fitness and Weight Management Club thread, but obviously in my early morning stupor I posted in the wrong thread ;-)

Dont worry Tee, I've just weak-ed and grabbed a pack of crisps from the vending machine :-(

Andy
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Re: what's a relapse?

Post by tee » 25 Mar 2010 17:21

Are they McCoys Andy? How about a nice wee snickers to follow? Mwah ha ha ha....
Perseverance is not a long race, it is a series of short races one after the other.

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Re: what's a relapse?

Post by Andy » 25 Mar 2010 17:50

Sorry no Walkers...

Dont think I'll do a snickers thanks, I dread to think what I might find in the kitchen when I get home, there is far to much crap such as cookies, chocs and other stuff around!!! I really must get that bloody rowing machine out, working from home tomorrow so I wont get all the walking that has been the 1 saving grace this week!!!
Journey started 22-Feb-10.

roledog33
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Re: what's a relapse?

Post by roledog33 » 18 Apr 2010 08:00

Does anyone post on this site anymore?

I'll keep reading the posts, maybe I'll get a better understanding what some consider a relapse and how to prevent them. Thanks everyone for your support and patience.

roledog33
An alcoholic will always need a drink; a drunk will always have one.

WendyinOz

Re: what's a relapse?

Post by WendyinOz » 18 Apr 2010 08:29

Sorry I can't help roledog

I've only got 7 days up and I personally would consider drinking again at this early stage a relapse for me

Other may know more than me.. and meanwhile click on the yellow oval at the top which says
"Self Help Resources" and have a look there.. it mentions relapse prevention there..

All the best
Mrs.H

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Re: what's a relapse?

Post by roledog33 » 18 Apr 2010 08:34

Mrs. H,
Thanks for the tip. I'll save that card until I really feel like drinking again. I never want to have another "relapse." I just can't do it. Wasting weekends by getting drunk and not remembering them is not the way I want to live. My family deserves better; I deserve better. Take care. All the best from Japan!!!

roledog33
An alcoholic will always need a drink; a drunk will always have one.

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Re: what's a relapse?

Post by tee » 18 Apr 2010 10:07

Hi roledog33, you're right it has been quieter than usual of late, but there's still loads of us around if you fancy a chat. :) It looks as if you've made your mind up to quit and that's great, well done! :P But if you're still wondering, my understanding of a relapse is falling off the wagon and staying down, resuming old habits and going back to how you were before. As opposed to a 'blip', where you fall off the wagon, realise your mistake and get back on it immediately/the next day. Hope this helps? :)

Best wishes
Tee ;)
Perseverance is not a long race, it is a series of short races one after the other.

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Re: what's a relapse?

Post by roledog33 » 18 Apr 2010 10:11

teetotal,
If what you have just posted is correct, then I have had major relapse. However, never again. I've been involved with this site for over a year now. Best I have done to date is 6 months. Then I went right back to my old ways. No more. This time, it's for good. Take care and thanks for the response.

roledog33
An alcoholic will always need a drink; a drunk will always have one.

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tee
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Re: what's a relapse?

Post by tee » 18 Apr 2010 10:16

Well RD, it happens mate, don't be too hard on yourself. <:)> It's no the falling down that counts, it's the getting up again yeah? And you sure are in fighting form, so how about taking on the 7 day challenge? 6 months is a fab personal best, I take my hat off to you :) Baby steps and all that, you'll get there again :P
Perseverance is not a long race, it is a series of short races one after the other.

WendyinOz

Re: what's a relapse?

Post by WendyinOz » 18 Apr 2010 14:17

Hi roledog

How about joining in the 7 day thread .. there are a lot of people there you can get to know and help you along the way.. and the members who've got a bit of sobriety under their collective belts and have moved on still drop back to support everyone ..I feel sure it will be a lovely new start for you and your family <:)>

Big wave from Australia to Japan :D

Mrs.H
(Wendy)

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Re: what's a relapse?

Post by Bela » 18 Apr 2010 14:53

Roledog, I posted this a couple of months ago, from a book called Willpower's not Enough, distinguishing between a slip and a relapse. To my way of thinking, if you've gone back to drinking pretty much without restraint, that is a relapse. If you had the one-off evening and immediately seriously returned to commitment to not drink that would be a slip.


p. 236 A slip is the isolated event of returning to the addictive behavior, If a slip is interrupted immediately, it can be a temporary loss of abstinence . . . A relapse is a full-blown return to the addictive behavior, usually resulting in the person dropping out of recovery. A relapse occurs if a slip is not interruped. Whether or not a slip is interrupted depends on your reaction to it -- whether you steer yourself immediately back into abstinence or have a defeatest reaction.

Same book points to 7 myths about relapse:

Myth #1. Relapse is a sign of recovery failure.
Myth #2. Relapse is a sign of poor motivation.
Myth #3. Relapse starts the instant you "pick up"
Myth #4. Relapse is unpredictable, and therefore unavoidable: it hits you out of the blue.
Myth #5. Relapse applies only to your drug of choice.
Myth #6. Relapse cancels out all progress made up to that point.
Myth #7. If a relapse isn't the end of recovery, then it's OK to have one.

from pp. 197 - 199
Whatever works.

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Re: what's a relapse?

Post by Tink » 18 Apr 2010 15:09

Roledog, <:)>
It is the nature of the beast mate. We all want to say never again. We all want it never again. I do know of those who have many years of abstinence and freedom. It comes with wisdom and a hunger for sobriety that fights the will to self destruct. That is what I have learned from them. I only have about 4 months but been at it for almost a year. I do feel good about it. I think I have a very good chance of staying sober if I just accept it and know that I do have this problem and what I need is all here. Support, the will to not drink and the tools to fight it. In the whole of if it all I am still a newly recovering alcoholic. I can only tell you what I have learned in this short time. It seems like a eternity but is not. I have a list that I always keep with me. I use this site. I do not keep things inside that can poison me. I got to know myself and do not lie to myself anymore. I do not lie to others about it anymore. I do the 12 steps and for me they work. I do what ever it takes to keep me sober. When I am weak I say so before I get to that first drink. It is not the last drink it is the first that gets you. If you can nip it and learn when you are about to go off then you have a good chance of fighting. It is all about learning yourself. Self discovery is key. I have slipped about 3 or 4 times in the months here. I learned about myself each time and got closer to success. That 3 months was a biggy for me. I feel OK right now as I did get over that hump. Next is the 6. One day at a time mate. Shields up and in my case the bullshit fence. :lol: You do what ever it takes to stay sober mate. It is at the top of your list. If I am sober all my ducks line up. I wish you a successful recovery mate. Hope is there and I can tell you that you can do it. I can do it and we all can. It is never gonna be easy but it will get easier. That is the truth. You will get peace and you will be able to deal with it all. Feeling will not kill you but drinking will.

Love and respect,
Tink <:)>
Life is a journey not a destination. Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, it is about learning to dance in the rain.

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Re: what's a relapse?

Post by roledog33 » 18 Apr 2010 23:08

Hey, all,
Thanks for the support and advice. I knew my "relapse" was not a sign of weakness or lack of motivation; it just happened. I thought I could control my drinking; found out, the hard way, I cannot. I joined the 7-day thread yesterday (Sunday). I'll be posting every day. Right now, it is a little after 7am, Monday morning, here and I have to get ready to go to work. But I'll be back later on today. Take care everyone!!!

roledog33
An alcoholic will always need a drink; a drunk will always have one.

roledog33
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Re: what's a relapse?

Post by roledog33 » 22 Apr 2010 22:57

maria,
Well done on Day 5. I'm on Day 6 today, myself. If I read your post right, after a month, you plan to drink again to see if you can control it? If I have misread, I do apologize. If I am correct, best of luck with that. I have found out the hard way that I cannot control my drinking. Typical binge drinker, I am; drink only to get drunk. So I have quit completely; this time for good.

Best of luck to you!!!!

roledog33
An alcoholic will always need a drink; a drunk will always have one.

roledog33
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Re: what's a relapse?

Post by roledog33 » 23 Apr 2010 22:57

maria,
It is tougher to not drink when you go abroad. Perfect example: my OH is from the Philippines. When we go to visit, all of her relatives like to sit around with me and drink. I mean starting early in the morning and stopping when we either a) pass out, b) run out, or c) it is just time to go to bed (which usually takes us back to option A). I tried setting some ground rules with myself; didn't work out too well. Might want to have a trusted friend or OH set the ground rules for you. This way you know they will be enforced. But you have to understand that once you two agree on the ground rules, you are going to stick to them, no matter what. I now have a simple ground rule: I cannot drink; just can't.

All the best!!

roledog33
An alcoholic will always need a drink; a drunk will always have one.

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