Initially I found these kinds of situations humiliating and difficult to deal with but when I first started tackling my addiction (I haven't been able to stop entirely yet, which is my goal but I'm down to about 13 units a week) I was taking medication and used that as an excuse, "I can't.... doctor's orders". It was a crappy excuse but allowed me to avoid drinking for a while while i thrashed around in my mind looking for some kind of grip on where I was in my life and organised getting some proper (and discrete) help.Laura-ANewStart wrote:I just wondered how everyone copes with situations where you could easily relapse , especially when you invite people round for dinner and they arrive bearing a bottle or out for a meal with friends .. Is it best to have just told them before 'i'm no longer drinking and would apprreciate your support' kind of thing or just say 'No thanks' and try and deal with the inevitable peer pressure to drink.
DH doesn't drink now in order to support me but is it enough just to have 1 person supporting us or do we need more?
These days I tell my friends that I don't want to drink because I don't feel healthy when I do. That's the honest truth and they accept it readily. I've even started going out with them again but I drink water and mint-tea and as long as I don't take a sip I'm fine and they're perfectly ok with my new "health kick". My closest friends also know that I have two modes... all or nothing... so I think they may be relieved that they don't have to pour me in the front door anymore.
Everyone must be different in how they deal with it but I don't tell most people that "I have to stop because I'm an alcoholic"... or something like that... The reason for that was because I would rather people see me acting from a position of strength and making a life-style choice as opposed to a position of weakness in recovering from a disease called alcoholism. So the message I chose to project was/is "I don't feel healthy when I drink..." My family and closest friends know the truth, of course, and I don't hide behind semantics with them but i still want them to see me acting on a positive life-style choice....
Some of you may feel it was weak of me to not shout to the whole world from the rooftops that I'm an alcoholic but frankly, the goal is the most important to me and that goal is to live a healthy life-style.... so that's that I shout from the rooftops....