The To Do List

Specific emotional or mental health problems, like anxiety, depression, insomnia, confidence etc. Along with bodily health, exercise, nutrition.
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Rachel
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Re: The To Do List

Post by Rachel »

DannyD wrote:
03 May 2021 10:11
Luna have a wonderful trip. I daresay that wifi might be internittent? And keep warm! I bet it's still very cold on the open decks at sea.

Rachel I want to give you a big hug. When I was married, I once went round his friends asking why they liked him. I was trying to find something that I hadn't seen. One told me "he's so funny". Nope. I never saw that side. Can you remember why you enjoyed his company when you first met? Try to rekindle that first affection? It does sound as though he's being deliberately provocative, and even spiteful in the garden. Fingers crossed he left the wisteria alone.
I think part of this is me - being tense because of mother situation and impending visit.
Partly it's him - he's stir crazy.
Action, I think you are right. We have been cooped up in the house together for over a year and rarely seen anyone else. He thinks he's more sociable than me and is struggling with lack of contact with others, other than his many work meetings a day with colleagues. (My introversion has become more extreme, but I have been meeting up with writing friends on zoom every other week, sometimes every week, and talking to my best friend at work, for a non-work chat, every week, throughout...) He is also fed up with the cluttered house which he regards as entirely my fault. (It's know it's not. I've seen his apartments in Germany...) He is in fact doing an awful lot of externalizing.
Ok this could be a worryingly bad rehearsal for retirement (yes I do see that future together) but at least then in principle it will be possible to get out more and do things more independently, then.
This will pass. But I think the garden is always going to be a sticking point, alas.

re my mother, the POA has stalled because the person we have asked to be the certificate holder wants to wait until after his second vaccine, in June. An issue for my mother, re dementia, is that she places a very high value on intelligence, including her own. This is a mistake on her part, imo, but that's how she thinks. She managed to get a first class degree as a mature student from a working class background in 1958ish and has always been proud on the point of hubris about this. It's never a good idea to put all your self-confidence eggs in one basket, so to speak.
tbh I don't think she has dementia in the sense most people, including her, think of it. Her cognitive functions although impaired are really not too bad. It's the memory that's the issue - at least as far as I can see. (She is quite good at covering things up so maybe she is able to reason less well than I realize - although that covering up requires some intelligence I suppose.)

I hope you enjoyed your walk and find your ring. Not sure how far you have got with Eleanor O. One aspect - relevant to BE people - didn't quite ring true to me, but an enjoyable bitter sweet book nonetheless with a nice twist later on (hope that's not giving too much away.)

Bean bargain, Danny! I really should sow some. Looks like raised beds are nearly there. Just need to add manure. I think I need to order more. Quite exciting.

to do: go and give husband a reconciliatory hug. He has helped me do the border and raised beds, even if he's not been happy about it!
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pickles
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Re: The To Do List

Post by pickles »

I hope things will feel brighter, Rachel . Good that you got a couple of raised beds done .

It’s Monday.

I hope your mother will be ok too .

Luna. Hope your trip goes well . Sounds fun .

Hi Danny, action , serend .

My peppers are sprouting, not the actual peppers , but it’s getting somewhere, it’s nice to see. The pea shoots are sprouting. OH says we will have enough peas . Well I hope so. And the tomato plant seems to be doing ok .

Breezy here . It’s just letting the dogs out in the garden day .
Last edited by pickles on 04 May 2021 10:07, edited 1 time in total.
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Rachel
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Re: The To Do List

Post by Rachel »

Glad your garden things are coming along. It's a nice feeling when things come up.

I have a maths problem with my tomatoes. I have ordered or have grown from seed 15 different types. I thought I had now, after giving loads away, just one type of each, but I still have 4 types to be delivered, yet seem to have 20 plants?! I am going to try and stick to 20 in total. Clearly I need a recount and another cull/giving away session.
I could keep 24 at a pinch. It's a bit nuts really, I realize, now writing this, but not unprecedented... :? Unfortunately I am also growing more aubergines this year and have some sweet peppers on order.

I am still trying to work out how many peas and beans to sow/how many I can fit in the raised beds. I thought I might do some sweetcorn too. I have never been successful with it in the past but maybe in a nice deep raised bed with the shed to give it a bit of protection from the wind...

Talking of which we have a storm blowing here. (43mph now, to go up to 51 :o ) Sadly it's bringing all the cherry blossom down - it had only just come out fully and was really stunning. It looks like it's snowing pink snow outside. Now if my greenhouse were here, I'd be worrying about it.... and indeed will. We seemed to have at least 6 storms like this last year.
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DannyD
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Re: The To Do List

Post by DannyD »

Morning

And here is me, looking for two tomatoes and a cucumber for my solitary grow bag. I plan to visit my local nursery at some point this week. It's a fine line, buying before they sell out, but warm enough to put out.

To do
Try to focus on the day. What do I want to achieve? If I try, I can be successful.

Have a good day y'all
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Action
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Re: The To Do List

Post by Action »

Morning All!

Well I opened my curtains and there it was ... blue sky and sunshine! \:)/ It was very windy last night wasn’t it. Miserable but it was lovely to be all tucked and cosy.

Partner goes home today until Friday next (14th) so it’s time to pull up my big girls pants and start being independent again. I’m really hoping now that I can start to rebuild my life and rediscover myself. It is the first time since Covid struck that I will have been on my own for a considerable period of time, in my own head and in my space for so long. Last time partner went home for just a few days I thought that Missy would miss him and wander around being morose, but she wasn’t at all. She was calm and showed no anxiety. Perhaps she picked up my vibes and enjoyed the fact that I wasn’t wound up or anxious. She is very sensitive. It’s such a shame because I do love him but it seems that is not enough. :|

Rachel, I wish I was just down the road and could be a benefactor of some of your tomatoes 🍅. I love them and always grow about three plants. For the last few years I’ve not had much luck and something always happens but last year I found the perfect spot and had a bumper crop. I usually opt for a cherry but last year my partner’s neighbour, who is a whizz gardener, gave us some plants of two varieties. One of the plants last year was a completely new variety totally blight free, I can’t remember it’s name but it was quite a big tomato and tasted exquisite. The other was a money maker ... which was tasteless. It made me laugh as the dog refused the money maker and ate the other one. I tried it a few times and each time she opted for the new one. That is the extent of my vegetable growing skills. I remember I actually put some wool pellets at the bottom of each plant in its grow bag...that might have helped my success, which reminds me I must finished putting pellets around my hostas.

I made a kedgeree last night, enough to feed 6 people. I’ve got loads left but partner can take a whole load with him for tonight. I don’t think he makes the effort to eat properly when he’s on his own :?

Rachel, I loved the fact that you gave your husband a reconciliatory hug last night. I do hope that he responded. <:)> I watched a film called Hope Springs yesterday evening, starring Meryl Streep and Tommy Lee Jones. It was about a couple who had been married for 32 years and had lost their way and how they go about rekindling their love. It was a little bizarre, but sweet and sensitively done none the less.

Danny, every little thing you do is an achievement. Remember that they are as important as the bigger things <:)> From my experience if I make the bed that’s a big tick \/ for me!

I wonder how our intrepid explorer is getting on...

To Do
Get going
Put washing on for partner so he has fresh clean clothes to take home (if he sorts any out first). It’s a perfect drying day!
Wrap up and take Missy out (it’s still quite windy)
See if I can persuade partner to cut a line for the new boarder in the front garden.
Shopping for supplies before he goes.
Birthday card/present for mum
Post some thank you letters
Pay in a birthday cheque ;)?
Drop him off
Shower
TV dinner
Bedfordshire

Rachel, can you recommend a good book? I’ve nearly finish Eleanor Oliphant. Nothing to high brow though, I really liked Gail Honeyman's conversational style.

Have a lovely day everyone <:)>
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Rachel
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Re: The To Do List

Post by Rachel »

If you were closer, I'd drop a tomato or plant off, Danny. And you too, Action. I always grow some ones that are resistant to early blight, after losing everything one year. There are quite a lot of blight resistant ones now. The Crimson range (crush, blush etc.) are good and come in the whole gamut of styles. Summerlast too, and this year I have grown from seed Mountain Magic which is supposed to be very blight resistant, and Losetto for the first time. Money maker is *supposed* to be good… Gardener’s Delight is reliable and good. Re wool pellets… I have never really found slugs a big problem with tomato plants, although one year the fruit were handing over a wall and the slugs clearly leaned over from another plant to eat them.

I've not sown cucumbers yet. I reckon they can wait a bit. Or maybe I should just buy one. That way I won't end up with three. You really don't need more than one and I'm not fussy about variety.

Still pretty windy here after last night's 51mph winds.

Didn’t get much sleep again. Mother and husband stress...
to do today
work. I don't seem to have that much to do :o Maybe there are things I am forgetting
ring Greenhouse people/People to see if they can enlighten me on possible delivery time. (I hope it can survive storms like last night's as we seem to have quite a few of these a year these days.) Already tried but I was no 15 in the queue so will try again later
ring mother's voluntary visitor/ringer people - she's not had a call or a fortnight. Might do her good to have one. ✔ they think she did call :(
ring chemist again - also engaged ✔ still engaged try again
pick up naughty parcel...which will also involve a walk.
maybe order lamp for mother if they still have it and husband is still gung ho to drive to Gravesend to pick it up. ✔ I really ballsed this up, but ended up having my card suspended, but hopefully ok now.
washing - mats ✔ work way through husband's stuff ✔ no.1 on
other stuff

I hope everyone has a good day.
Rachel

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DannyD
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Re: The To Do List

Post by DannyD »

Morning.

Back in the mists of time, before the world began, the lock on my front door broke. (Think it was February). It was suggested by the lock people, that I needed a new lock. The door was so old it should be replaced too (yes, it was old and draughty). I asked a builder to organise repairs. We explained I'd need a brickie as we decided to revamp the front of the porch. Instead of booking a brickie then, he left it until the new door had been built. Which was at least a month ago. Now you cannot get hold of a brickie as they are all so busy building home offices for people. Yesterday I sent builder a text asking for an update, to be told he's starting this morning at 9.

To do
Empty porch
Dust and vacuum through.
Sweep and wash floor.
Have breakfast
Welcome builders.

Does that timeline give you an idea of how stressed I feel having building men on site? So much to do before they arrive.

After the weekend storms, we've had problems with the water pressure. I shall want a shower today. Might need to stand in the rain - or roll around in the dew wet grass. And that's another

To do
Cut the grass. It will keep growing.
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Topcat
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Re: The To Do List

Post by Topcat »

DannyD wrote:
05 May 2021 03:39
Does that timeline give you an idea of how stressed I feel having building men on site?
Feel for you Danny. Good luck <:)>

Hi to all To Doers <:)>
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Re: The To Do List

Post by serend »

Morning everyone, suns out here today. Working online but at least it looks brighter out there. Hope you are all okay.
Been a busy few weeks here, not had much time to even log on, but have taken stock the past few days and brought some routine back into life (and realised need to delegate more!). Anyway juts a short one, have a good day everyone, to do here;

work
walk
cook something healthy
drink lots of water
thing about how I want the future to look (Rachel you mentioned retirement, have left it rather late but must think about planning that!)
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DannyD
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Re: The To Do List

Post by DannyD »

Well. It's gone 9, and there is no sign of workmen. Am I surprised? Sadly - and this is a reflection of today's expectations of tradesmen - no.

To do
Unblock the hoover hose. Any suggestions? Complete blockage of solid dog hair in the middle where I can't reach.
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Rachel
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Re: The To Do List

Post by Rachel »

Eek Danny. Good luck and I hope they do come after all that.

Do you have a cane you could poke down the hose? Hoover recommends a broom handle.

Hello Serend!


I am feeling a little less down right now. Sun is in and out. Rain later.

I need to
do some work ✔
put bird food out ✔
I ought to
sow some bean and/or pea seeds. Still can't work out how many to do. Maybe just sow some. If I do to many, vow to throw them away. ✔ 24 pots/tubes of assorted peas and French beans, dwarf and clmbing, and some mangetout that can also be eaten as peas. Also planted out a few things
walk up to the chemist's for my prescription. I need the exercise but it's an hour round trip on foot.
pick up parcel that didn't come yesterday if it did come today which could be en route.
was thinking about making caramels for mother. Hmm.
I could do to prune a bit of the wisteria - the bits that are stopping light getting into the sitting room and kitchen. ✔
ring greenhouse people
maybe ring mother's doctors. (I really should...)
washing x 4 ✔
packing list and to do list for the weekend :?
prepare a Middle Eastern feast (but not from scratch.) ✔
Maybe I will take another day off to have a day of no obligation at some point next week. Will see how the weekend goes maybe.

I probably won't get much of this done...

I hope everyone's day goes ok.
Last edited by Rachel on 05 May 2021 20:04, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: The To Do List

Post by DannyD »

I tried poking - simply solidified more. It really is a fat berg of dog hair. It's a slow job, but I've created a hook on the end of some wire, and I'm trying to pull it out. It's right in the middle of the hose. Big sigh.

I've been looking at my wisteria. I think it has suffered with frost bite. It's not looking very happy. I planted out my dozen broad beans yesterday. I think I'll go with a few runner beans. As soon as I can get some compost for the next raised bed, I shall sow some peas, and hope it's not too late.

To do.
Contact builder and tell him I'm going out.
Fill in my diary with wedding dates because a local vicar has just booked me (cheering. We had a lovely phone chat).

EDIT. cheering. I think it's all unblocked. Only taken me an hour. Or so.
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Rachel
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Re: The To Do List

Post by Rachel »

It's not too late for peas. Or for any types of beans. But I really need to sow some!

I just can't decide how many to do.

Runner beans can be sown until quite late as they are very hardy so will keep going well into autumn.
In the past peas sown direct have been better than ones sown indoors.
French dwarf beans you can sow in succession as they don't last as long as climbers.

This is all on the basis of research rather than experience I should add.

Last year my broad and French climbing beans and peas were sown on the 25th April, but I sowed runner beans in June. I did buy plants too though last year. At this rate I'll be doing that again!

Will do some work then sow some French climber, maybe borlotti and maybe broad beans. Thing is I don't want another tray for the cat sitters to have to look after this weekend, but unavoidable I suppose. They could miss two day's watering though? Aggh. I have too many things on the go! I don't think any of the other seedlings will need watering if I put water in their trays, though. One week holiday in two and half weeks is another matter though.
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Re: The To Do List

Post by DannyD »

Builders eventually arrived, to measure up (thought they'd done that). And then left again saying they'd come back and crack on, on Monday. They couldn't start today because of the weekend (?). There's a weekend every week end.

Ok Rachel I'm taking your advice. I've bought compost for my next bed; all I have to do is fill it up (one bag at a time. These are 60 litres. I used 3 x 70 litres for the first bed. B&Q advise that 3 x 50 litres is sufficient.) And then I shall sow some peas. I also bought 2 different tomatoes and a cucumber, so that's my grow bag sorted.

I'd offer to come and house sit for your week holiday, but your cats would hate my dog.

Oh - and I think I've unblocked the monster.

Walking the dog and it started to hail.
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Rachel
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Re: The To Do List

Post by Rachel »

That's a bit lazy of them, Danny.

Well done with the vaccum.

I sowed some peas and beans! I feel much better now but also slightly anxious as more for the cat sitters to look after. Possibly. Only if they germinate before Friday? Hmm. I really should have done them yesterday or tomorrow? I hope it's ok to grow lots of different types of French beans together. They are self-pollinating aren't they? I suppose I might end up with some interesting crosses, in theory, although I won't know unless I keep seed for next year. I thought I had some borolotti beans but it would seem I have some borlotti-like French dwarf beans. Could still get some...
There is something very lovely about dried beans. Texture, appearance...
I would have liked to have sown sweetcorn too, but have mislaid the seeds. I need to go through my (very many) tins and have a sort out again.

If anyone wants any, I have a lot of spare seed of many types.
Rachel

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Re: The To Do List

Post by DannyD »

Morning.

Which beans did you sow Rachel? I'm still hanging fire on runners - think it might still be a little early.

A zoom meeting from the workplace yesterday. Really interesting. Facts and figures of how the business has survived lockdown, and plans for reopening. I never know 'how to leave the room' with zoom though.

Action I hope you're enjoying your alone time.

Luna I'm giving you a wave, just in case an odd WiFi flies past you. I hope you're enjoying the trip.

Pickles I was thinking of applying for a job with your town council. I'm good at destroying plants.

Serend keep a clear head. Life often resolves itself.
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DannyD
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Re: The To Do List

Post by DannyD »

Forgot:

To do
Yesterday I pulled out my old fridge. Today I shall have to clean the vacated space.
Clean up the garden after the storm.
I'm trying no mow may because it's supposed to be good for wildlife, but frankly it's because I'm basically lazy. All the edges need trimming before the flower beds become lawn.
Scrub down the decking
And paint with anti slip stuff. Which I fear is green. Might be a shock to the system.
Scatter nasturtium and calendula seeds with gay abandon. I could use their cheerful colours.
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pickles
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Re: The To Do List

Post by pickles »

Morning. It’s a mixture of weather these last couple of days . Quite stormy on Tuesday evening and last night . I brought my tulip pots in the veranda for safety , the planted ones outside are rather battered now unfortunately. A few leaves from the planted laurel had been flying around too .

But it’s calm so far this morning. I should take all three dogs out , but younger dog is slower now , I took her for a short walk last night , 2x for junior as he needed it . Hairy dog didn’t like that and did a revenge pee in the kitchen :|

How annoying yesterday. I was in town for a check up and suddenly at 5.05pm I got a text message saying I could go for my first vaccine ( I had been picked!) but I wasn’t in the area to get there 10 minutes later . So it would have taken me 45 minutes to get there, and I hadn’t got to the car park . I then had a phone call from them . The person sounded so happy for me , and I had to explain I was at another appointment, no where near the vaccine centre.

My phone will be on sound , all day today . A friends husband had the same . He was driving home when he had the last minute call !

So, we will wait ... and wait ..

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Rachel
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Re: The To Do List

Post by Rachel »

Pickles that is annoying. Presumably they had some left over vaccine at the end of the day.

Yes it is awkward leaving a zoom room. I often find, though, that I am not quick enough on the draw and others disappear in between me saying goodbye and clicking both 'buttons'.

I sowed lots of different types of French beans - half climbers and half dwarf. Do you want a list? :) My faves are (in terms of appearance) the Yin Yang ones. I don't think I am going to bother with runner. I have limited space. The rows are supposed to be 2ft apart. Not sure how this works if you do a teepee though. Will see. I may do them in a big tub, but last year I couldn't keep up with them and they were horribly stringy.
Peas were Kelvedon wonder. Will need to do lots more of these, but not a bad idea to sow in succession. The mangetout (which I am not a big fan of, but as mentioned these ones can also be left to become peas - which mangetout can't usually.) are Carouby de Maussane. last year's mangetout were worth growing just for the flowers.

I thought I'd interplant with calendula... but I noticed an aphidy thing on one of my seedlings in the lean to. It looks like they are sacrifice plants rather than deterrents. Not sure if I want to risk that. My beans were pretty aphid free last year. Maybe grow in pots a few meters away...?
Done
I have voted
Done a load of washing
Rung my mother’s surgery. (Over a month now to sign of permission to access her records.)
Tried to ring Greenhouse People – decided to email instead as 15 ahead in the queue, and they almost certainly won’t be able to give me an answer
Tried to ring memory clinic and gave up because again I don’t really think they can help.
To do
Chase parcel that still hasn’t arrived. I think DPD have lost it but won’t admit it. This has happened before notably with something I ordered to go to MIL’s funeral. By the time they admitted it, it was too late – the dress has sold out so no replacement possible.
I ought to go and get prescription. I ask for a lift but it was a now or never thing and now isn’t convenient. I don’t want to tire myself out doing the one hour walk, really. I am tired already.
Other stuff.
I hope everyone’s day is going ok.
Rachel

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DannyD
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Re: The To Do List

Post by DannyD »

Morning

That's frustrating about the vaccine Pickles. Can you be proactive and phone them back to ask for an appointment?

I've sown Kelvedon wonder with some radishes as a catch crop. I've no room for a second sowing. I remember in French vineyards, they grow dahlias and geranium plants at the end of the rows. Not sure why dahlias - attract all the slugs and snails maybe. I need more compost for the next raised bed, but it's twice the size of the previous beds, so presumably will take twice as many bags. I have steps down to my garden, so it's difficult to barrow. I also worry, going down the steps, toting a bag of compost.

I've woken up feeling groggy after a really bad night of dreaming. After watching Bent Coppers last night, I dreamt that I was being fitted up for all sorts of misdemeanours.

To do
Plumbing bits. Get my shower plug sorted. I took it out to clean, and now I can't get it back in
Walk the dog. I feel very cold still, wrap up, then find it's tropical in the sun.
I'm sure there's something else, but can't think what

Have a good day y'all
be selfish in your sobriety.

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