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Life Improvement Workshop

Specific emotional or mental health problems, like anxiety, depression, insomnia, confidence etc. Along with bodily health, exercise, nutrition.
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Shadowlad
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Re: Life Improvement Workshop

Post by Shadowlad » 07 Aug 2019 20:01

Ruby&Tilly wrote:
06 Aug 2019 21:02
Thanks shadowlad, not 100% sure how much I'm gonna like volunteering with crisis, there's a lot of repetitive work and my office skills are well out of date but hopefully I'll get quicker on the computer and be able to take on my own projects as well as helping out with the admin/typing. Overall I think my benefits may well be stopped maybe next year and I think Crisis would be a nice place to work, just need to make myself indispensable One good thing is, I may be able to work from home after I've been there a while, I could do them a lot more hours if i didn't have to spend 2 hours a day travelling but the social side of things is partly why I'm there too?
That's a shame about the travelling time Ruby but one good thing about volunteering there is that your office skills will soon come back, its a nice feeling when you start using your old skills again. The social side of things is an added bonus, but if you can work from home part of the time that might work better for you as you say.
Ruby&Tilly wrote:
06 Aug 2019 21:02
Managed week 1 session 2 of the c25k, the gym was really busy and all the treadmills were taken by the end, there was some really macho army looking guys running with packs on, I couldn't wait to leave! (w)
Well done for the effort !
Ruby&Tilly wrote:
06 Aug 2019 21:02
Collected Office 365 from the library, some bedtime reading. Need to finish my sociology essay, maybe tomorrow? Craving a bit today, probably nerves/reward for volunteering, keeping busy helped and the offie will be closed in 53 mins, but who's counting.
You sound very resourceful Ruby and motivated. Sometimes the craving can be associated with the reward system or nerves as you say or other times it can be because we get busy and forget to eat or drink regularly or rest when needed. I used to forget these basic things and it accounted for a lot of cravings until the penny dropped :idea:
Ruby&Tilly wrote:
06 Aug 2019 21:02
How are you getting on Shadowlad? Any lurkers?
The volunteering is going well though it is not every day and it is for up to 4 hours at a time. At first i was terrified of answering the phone on reception and shadowed other staff for a while. Have always hated using a phone. Plus my concentration has been shot at. Its improved now though and i have found volunteering has increased confidence. It is good to be working in a setting with all the same client groups that i am used to working with. Its nice to make a difference and to help people in need isn't it :)

Its great to have little goals, i never really had any for several years. Its lovely to read how others lives are improving too so thanks for sharing Ruby ! And of course everyone else who has written on here ;)?
Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it.

Dennis P. Kimbro

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Re: Life Improvement Workshop

Post by Bluebottle » 07 Aug 2019 21:02

I hate answering the phone too, I'm a bit deaf doesn't help, hopefully that won't be part of the job. Yeah I like helping people too and being busy, need to watch that I don't overdo it. Glad to hear you're enjoying your volunteering and you're gaining confidence. ;)?

Ruby XX
When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.
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Shadowlad
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Re: Life Improvement Workshop

Post by Shadowlad » 07 Aug 2019 21:12

Thank you. Yes, same here with overdoing it <:)>
Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it.

Dennis P. Kimbro

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Re: Life Improvement Workshop

Post by Winkler » 28 Aug 2019 09:10

I don’t think there is a meditation thread is there? Would be good to read others meditation experience and practice if there is and could anyone can point me in the right direction pls?

Anyway, started meditating again today and liked it, don’t know why it took me 2 days to build up to actually doing it :roll: Only 15 mins :oops: but was comfortable and doing my own thing, not guided, not counting breathing, just sitting. Not reading about it, too much info out there and I’ve done plenty in the past, actually, and know what does and doesn’t work for me to get going anyway. Probably need less guidance and background sounds than at one time. Used the insight timer app for a little bell at the beginning and end.

I always think I have not enough time in the day but I waste time - online games mainly and actually meditation is very much your time isn’t it and just a few minutes. I could literally feel my body relax and where the body goes, the mind does too..?

So pleased I seem to have lost the drinking habit, what a complete waste of time and so unnecessary for anything worthwhile. Complete illusion that it’s necessary to enjoy anything in life. I’m not thinking I’ve cracked it and my guard remains up as far as alcohol is concerned. In no way is it the harmless nice thing it’s portrayed as. It’s a legal, dangerous drug. C’est tout! Better late than never, carry on all ;)? <:)> <:)>
Truth waits for eyes unclouded by longing - Lao Tzu

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Re: Life Improvement Workshop

Post by Luna_ » 28 Aug 2019 09:39

Winkler wrote:
28 Aug 2019 09:10
In no way is it the harmless nice thing it’s portrayed as. It’s a legal, dangerous drug. C’est tout! Better late than never, carry on all ;)? <:)> <:)>
Winkler <:)>

I was just thinking the same on the way in to work today. I guess for some, it is harmless, because they never get addicted. I can take or leave chocolate - but many can't. But for very many, we get addicted - and it then becomes a very dangerous slide indeed. Isn't is also such a horrible thing - that the thing we most want and desire is a life free of all the negative, problematic aspects of drinking. But for some (like me) - it just feels impossible to be free of the desire to drink. But that desire doesn't fulfill anything pleasurable any more - it only ever leads to another bout of months on the spiral - and then whoah, another third of a year's plans not realised, deadlines overdue etc.

I think there is a meditation thread somewhere - but I can't seem to find it.

Well done on prioritising meditation - I wish you well with that. You are so right - 30 mins meditation time seems like faaar too much - but hours (or days :oops: ) of drinking cost us far more time than any amount of meditation ever would.

Have a good day, all
I still have Faith, but right now I'm reaching for the moon.

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Shadowlad
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Re: Life Improvement Workshop

Post by Shadowlad » 28 Aug 2019 22:12

Hi there Luna and all,
Winkler wrote:
28 Aug 2019 09:10
I don’t think there is a meditation thread is there? Would be good to read others meditation experience and practice if there is and could anyone can point me in the right direction pls?
Hi Winkler, there is a meditation thread and some really good links and posts on it. Please ignore mine though, i have edited a couple of posts, was having a bad day and it was embarrassing reading it back, lol.

viewtopic.php?f=4&t=573

Winkler wrote:
28 Aug 2019 09:10
So pleased I seem to have lost the drinking habit, what a complete waste of time and so unnecessary for anything worthwhile. Complete illusion that it’s necessary to enjoy anything in life. I’m not thinking I’ve cracked it and my guard remains up as far as alcohol is concerned. In no way is it the harmless nice thing it’s portrayed as. It’s a legal, dangerous drug. C’est tout! Better late than never, carry on all
Really pleased for you too Winkler <:)>
Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it.

Dennis P. Kimbro

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Re: Life Improvement Workshop

Post by Winkler » 29 Aug 2019 16:50

Ah thanks Shadow and I will get over to that thread - I tried searching but couldn’t get it using ‘meditation’ ! Are u still practicing?

Hi Luna 👋 and thanks for your reply, you’re right of course, alcohol probably isn’t harmful to everyone although i think anyone will get addicted doing enough of it for long enough and I think we probably all did/do :oops:

If I can offer hope to you - drinking definitely isn’t on my mind these days, or far less often anyway and I think it is almost all down to length of time off it and lifestyle change in that it doesn’t have to be accommodated any more. Out of sight, out of mind kind of thing.

It does seem as though meditation can offer some relief from repetitive, negative and obsessive thoughts around alcohol, or anything else simply becoming used to observing and detaching from our thoughts through meditation practice - I’ll post some links on the meditation thread in case it’s of interest you? <:)>
Truth waits for eyes unclouded by longing - Lao Tzu

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Shadowlad
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Re: Life Improvement Workshop

Post by Shadowlad » 29 Aug 2019 20:47

Hi again Winkler, no i haven't practised meditation for a while, but really felt the benefits when i did. Its a shame mountainhare is not around anymore, he really motivated a lot of people with his posts on his Buddhist retreats and practices. I seem to be getting the hang of mindfulness now, and that is really helping with grounding and lessening anxiety. I will have a good read of your link and start practising meditation again so thanks for the motivation ;)?
Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it.

Dennis P. Kimbro

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Re: Life Improvement Workshop

Post by Luna_ » 03 Sep 2019 20:41

Ah Winkler, Shadowlad - and anyone else popping in.

Mindfulness and meditation seem so very well suited to beating this common evil.
Cravings, as we all know, pop up unannounced. But they really don't last so very long. Well, they keep coming back - but mindfulness and urge-surfing go a very long way.

I have this problem that I can go for some time AF - and love it - but sometimes, something in my stupid mind thinks "oh I'm fixed then - so OK I can have a bottle of innocent white wine.... nee nawww... give it 2 days and we are back on the (*edit for reasons of the comparing - and the "oh then I'm not so bad" thing) XX+ unit masochism slide.

Yes, meditation is very useful - and I do use A LOT - the michael sealey youtube offerings. Some say his voice is creepy - but I love it. It has helped me on very many sleepless nights - and yes, there is one for alcohol/problem drinking. Although I think I got beyond what he was thinking - there is binge drinking - and there is chronic/dependent alcohol use/abuse.

Well well...

I am going to go to bed with my current Kindle book (Sapiens - by Yuval Noah Harari - it irritated me the first few pages - but then I got into it and now I can't put it down.) My alarm goes off 0600 and with my insomnia problem, I need a longer time in bed than if I could just lie down and get uninterrupted Zzz's

So - nightie night guys <:)>
I still have Faith, but right now I'm reaching for the moon.

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Re: Life Improvement Workshop

Post by Winkler » 04 Sep 2019 06:26

Hey Luna, hope you slept ok
Insomnia is a horrible thing - I suffer from time to time. Its good to have a book you enjoy
Have you read ‘naked mind’ by Annie Grace? it’s helped me get and keep going AF so far this time. That and the mantra of ‘NO alcohol no matter what’ to avoid the debate when the thoughts sneak back. Eventually the addiction gives up again for a time and that time gets longer, as we know. I hope I continue to be scared of going back again. There’s more to life than that great big bore, both big and small, just takes a bit of time for drinking to become irrelevant when you’re back in the zone doesn’t it?

I enjoy guided meditations sometimes too. I remember one where you visualised all your worries being screwed up and hurled away - that was a good one. Glenn Harold. Agree the voice is important, listened to one by Tara Brach the other day and didn’t like hers which is a shame.
Mostly liking just sitting with a bit of a body scan atm then just being aware of the sounds around with awareness of breathing to return to and a timer on, feels like that time when you’re all cosy and ready to go off to sleep but it goes on for longer!
Truth waits for eyes unclouded by longing - Lao Tzu

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Re: Life Improvement Workshop

Post by Trojan » 18 Sep 2019 19:49

Recently Mrs. Trojan has been reading “The Desire Map” by Danielle LaPorte. The book points out that people pursue goals because of the positive feelings generated. It suggests that we can pursue the same feelings in a more tactical way, so we can experience them day by day instead of linking them to some future accomplishment.

The idea seems to be to identify how you want to feel (“core desired feelings” in the lingo of the book) and then use that to guide your choice of goals. By doing that, the pursuit of the goal can potentially feel as good as attaining the goal itself. I haven’t had a chance to read the details, but it sounds like developing a set of values as much as goals? :?

I’m looking forward to getting my turn with the book :) Has anyone else read it?
Au milieu de l'hiver, j'apprenais enfin qu'il y avait en moi un été invincible.
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Re: Life Improvement Workshop

Post by Shadowlad » 29 Nov 2019 18:55

Trojan wrote:
18 Sep 2019 19:49
I’m looking forward to getting my turn with the book :) Has anyone else read it?
No i haven't read that Trojan, have you read it now and how did you find it ?

Feeling quite chuffed here that i have managed to make some changes recently to improve physical and mental health. I have reduced refined sugar intake and caffeine intake by about 95 % for the last 3 weeks and intend to keep this way. Unlike alcohol where i keep totally abstinent its nice to know i can have the odd treat so it has made it easy to get in the mindset of cutting the majority of it out. Also managed to cut down internet surfing by 80 % Feeling better for all these changes.

It feels good to know i haven't got the struggle of copious amounts of chocolate this festive season because i simply won't touch chocolate at all. But can have the odd other treat on holiday days. Might even wait until Easter before i have chocolate again :shock:

New goals are :

Keep improving physical and mental health and get swimming again.
Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it.

Dennis P. Kimbro

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Re: Life Improvement Workshop

Post by Trojan » 30 Nov 2019 10:02

Nicky, it’s really good to hear that you’re feeling the benefit of the changes you’ve made :-)

I like the way you (rightly) frame these as empowered choices with good outcomes, and not deprivation of any sort ;)?

I need to cut down on screen time too, especially internet browsing, which is like an endless rabbit hole :shock: Have you found yourself with a lot of extra time since doing this?

I haven’t read the book yet, beyond dipping into it. I am making this my December (tomorrow :shock: ) assignment to tie in with a general overhaul of how I spend my time, and will devote time to it over Christmas.

Hope all the improvers are keeping well :-)
Au milieu de l'hiver, j'apprenais enfin qu'il y avait en moi un été invincible.
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Re: Life Improvement Workshop

Post by Shadowlad » 01 Dec 2019 16:32

Trojan wrote:
30 Nov 2019 10:02
I need to cut down on screen time too, especially internet browsing, which is like an endless rabbit hole :shock: Have you found yourself with a lot of extra time since doing this?
So true about the endless rabbit hole ! Yes, by having an internet detox i found far more time, got a lot of things done and connected with those around me again. It had been noted that the house could burn down around me and i wouldn't notice when online :? :oops:
Trojan wrote:
30 Nov 2019 10:02
I haven’t read the book yet, beyond dipping into it. I am making this my December (tomorrow ) assignment to tie in with a general overhaul of how I spend my time, and will devote time to it over Christmas.
Good one Trojan ;)?
Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it.

Dennis P. Kimbro

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Re: Life Improvement Workshop

Post by Bluebottle » 05 Dec 2019 03:57

Don't know where to start, trying to pick myself up from a bad depression, feel like I could do with a holiday, could maybe visit my sister for a couple of days. Failing that I need to get back to my volunteering and catch up with friends.

Suggestions in an encyclopedia please :D

Ruby xx
When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.
352/12 days - sober/drinking (14 April 2018 - 13 April 2019)
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Re: Life Improvement Workshop

Post by Trojan » 05 Dec 2019 08:40

Ruby, sorry that you've been having a tough time <:)>

Are you familiar with WRAP - Wellness Recovery Action Plan?

"WRAP is a tool that can aid an individual’s recovery and its underpinning principles support the recovery approach. WRAP is a way of monitoring wellness, times of being less well and times when experiences are uncomfortable and distressing. It also includes details of how an individual would like others to support them at these different times.”

It's often mentioned at the meetings I go to, and peeps find it helpful as a framework for thinking about their situation, and planning ahead - for diffiuclt times and for better times :-)

There are some templates here...

http://www.cwp.nhs.uk/about-us/our-camp ... plan-wrap/

Often some time out is just what we need to change our perspective. I hope you do arrange a break with your sister <:)>
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Re: Life Improvement Workshop

Post by Bluebottle » 05 Dec 2019 21:40

Thanks Trojan, I did a wrap course a long time ago, not that I remember much, at my sister's just now, unfortunately with a glass of wine in my hand, feeling a bit better but in a way I'm running away. The whole thing has been so draining, but we've been reminiscing, which is nice.

Ruby xx
When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.
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Re: Life Improvement Workshop

Post by Trojan » 06 Dec 2019 16:57

Ruby, WRAP could be worth another look. Like all these things, it's putting it into practice that makes the difference. Meanwhile enjoy your time out :-)
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Re: Life Improvement Workshop

Post by Bluebottle » 06 Dec 2019 21:04

Thanks Trojan, I might look into that, Day 1

Ruby xx
When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.
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Re: Life Improvement Workshop

Post by Bluebottle » 09 Feb 2020 20:21

I may be a little late for New year's resolutions but this will keep me accountable, here goes:

Stop smoking \/
Stick within my quotas of drinking :?
Gym 3 or 4 times a week \/
Walking 2 or 3 times a week \/
Yoga, most nights
Lose weight, at least 5 kg
Would like a new relationship but would settle for new friends :mrgreen:
Gut my house. :mrgreen:
Ruby xx
When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.
352/12 days - sober/drinking (14 April 2018 - 13 April 2019)
307/59 days - 2019/2020

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