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Our kids

Partners, families, children and friends - they all get affected by your drinking.
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pickles
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Re: Our kids

Post by pickles » 27 Nov 2015 16:53

Something like that, yes faith.
Last edited by pickles on 16 Feb 2016 16:41, edited 2 times in total.
' Normal ' is just a setting on the washing machine .

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Sandy
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Re: Our kids

Post by Sandy » 27 Nov 2015 17:08

.........Fath wrote............ a combination of circumstances led to poor choices, but at the time they seemed the only choices.

I recently posted something in the same vein as the above posts on "just want to share" thread.
Faith I want to speak to my son about the hurt I caused him when drinking..............I think your words are where I will start..........
Thanks love <:)>

Nicky and Pickles and everyone else who has these feelings, I got great comfort from people telling me that we also must focus on how hard we are trying to improve things and not let this type of hurt happen to our kids again
<:)> <:)> <:)>

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Shadowlad
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Re: Our kids

Post by Shadowlad » 27 Nov 2015 22:34

Sandy and Faith, thank you for your thoughtful words <:)> xx
Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it.

Dennis P. Kimbro

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MissJo
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Re: Our kids

Post by MissJo » 25 Jan 2016 11:42

My daughter (13) has been having panic/anxiety attacks at school- she got upset last night and told me. There are no other concerns at school- her work/teachers and friends are all great. She admits that there is nothing 'wrong'. She just gets a rising panic randomly- and then the physical symptoms like heart racing/breathing/panic.
We have spoken about it- and I will mention it to the nurse tomorrow when she gets her bloods done. Apart from this- she is always happy and relaxed. Our home situation is calm and happy.

My own drinking stemmed from a panic attack years ago at university. Out of nowhere.
Part of me is worried that it's a hereditary thing and she is getting what I had. Plus- her dad also suffered with anxiety and drank heavily.

At least she has spoken about it- and is happy to see the lady at school to talk it through whereas I didn't tell a sole for over 20 years and suffered in silence.

Just thought I would get it off my chest, so to speak. I've been reading back- and I can see some poignant thought provoking stories.
Hugs to all. <:)> <:)>
MissJo

First joined July 31st 2012
#21~ 2016 Drinking Challenge

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Topcat
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Re: Our kids

Post by Topcat » 25 Jan 2016 15:11

MissJo wrote: At least she has spoken about it- and is happy to see the lady at school to talk it through whereas I didn't tell a sole for over 20 years and suffered in silence.
Sorry to read about your daughter MissJo, but pleased to read the above. I too started to get panic attacks about the same age (didn't even know what they were at the time and that made them all the more frightening). I never told anyone and, as a result no doubt, they escalated.

Hope things improve for her <:)>
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When life kicks sand in your face, build a castle.

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MissJo
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Re: Our kids

Post by MissJo » 25 Jan 2016 15:16

Thanks TC.
She was fine this morning so I'm going to take each day at a time.
Another concern I have is that she had been reading signs and symptoms about anxiety online.
I do worry that information available online can maybe trick readers into developing symptoms to fit a medical condition... :?
MissJo

First joined July 31st 2012
#21~ 2016 Drinking Challenge

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pickles
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Re: Our kids

Post by pickles » 25 Jan 2016 15:19

I hope things go okay also MissJo with the appointment and advice from the nurse . My daughter is going through anxiety ,not wanting to go to school and anxious about the bullies . We have had quite a few meetings about it now and things are finally being looked into .

It's not easy for daughter to explain and she flies off the handle easily , sometimes in the car also which can be scary .
Noises, twitches get her , texture of her clothes , things like that .

Anyway ,hope things go okay .
' Normal ' is just a setting on the washing machine .

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Topcat
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Re: Our kids

Post by Topcat » 25 Jan 2016 15:21

MissJo wrote: She was fine this morning so I'm going to take each day at a time.
Good idea ;)?

Pickles - so sorry your daughter is having issues with bullies, but glad things are finally being looked into ;)?
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When life kicks sand in your face, build a castle.

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pickles
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Re: Our kids

Post by pickles » 26 Jan 2016 07:44

Thanks TC <:)>

MissJo, I hope today goes as well as it can <:)>
' Normal ' is just a setting on the washing machine .

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MissJo
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Re: Our kids

Post by MissJo » 26 Jan 2016 09:24

Thank you Pickles.
We are getting the train to Bham about 10 am. I'll check in later. <:)>
MissJo

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Shadowlad
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Re: Our kids

Post by Shadowlad » 10 Jan 2017 14:25

My son is going through a difficult time at the moment. He is finally reaching out to me and for that i am very relieved. He may be coming back to live with me as we work through things together. He is a good person and but has lost his way just recently. We have talked more honestly than we have ever done yesterday and i hope it continues. It explains why he was so quiet on our Christmas day dinner. Now i can understand and be there for him and i am so very grateful to be sober and in a good place to be there. Nothing else on this earth matters to me as this right now and i need to stay patient, non judgemental, tolerant, firm and fair in order to help him help himself. I love him so much.
Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it.

Dennis P. Kimbro

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Topcat
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Re: Our kids

Post by Topcat » 10 Jan 2017 14:55

That's very good to hear Nicky (::) So glad that your Son is reaching out to you and hope it goes well.
Shadowlad wrote:Nothing else on this earth matters to me as this right now and i need to stay patient, non judgemental, tolerant, firm and fair in order to help him help himself.
I'm sure you will too Nicky <:)>
#5 on the 2020 Challenge
When life kicks sand in your face, build a castle.

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pickles
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Re: Our kids

Post by pickles » 11 Jan 2017 07:23

That's lovely to read , Nicky . It's important as a parent to listen to our children . I do wish at times my parents had listened to my brother , he was at such a loss through his 20's and then the last part of his life . It was almost like he was to blame at times but he did try .
My father was too 'old school' much as a lovely man he was on the outside , I just think he couldn't cope and just kept 'stiff upper lip' about things . We couldn't open up to my parents at all, I was too scared to .

I'm glad my daughter and I are close . Although I will have to watch out for those teenage years .

Hope your day goes well ,Nicky ;)? . You too TC .
' Normal ' is just a setting on the washing machine .

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Topcat
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Re: Our kids

Post by Topcat » 11 Jan 2017 08:44

pickles wrote: It's important as a parent to listen to our children
Never a truer word Pickles ;)? I wish mine had been less busy and spent more time just listening.
#5 on the 2020 Challenge
When life kicks sand in your face, build a castle.

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Shadowlad
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Re: Our kids

Post by Shadowlad » 12 Jan 2017 00:09

Thanks TC and Pickles :) <:)>

Hope you've both had a good day xx
Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it.

Dennis P. Kimbro

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pickles
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Re: Our kids

Post by pickles » 12 Jan 2017 08:18

.
Last edited by pickles on 18 Dec 2017 02:09, edited 1 time in total.
' Normal ' is just a setting on the washing machine .

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Topcat
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Re: Our kids

Post by Topcat » 12 Jan 2017 08:26

Hope today is a better one for you Pickles <:)>
#5 on the 2020 Challenge
When life kicks sand in your face, build a castle.

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DannyD
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Re: Our kids

Post by DannyD » 12 Jan 2017 09:44

Pickles, yes, you were the one with the problem. You've faced up to it and life is much better for you. Don't let your OH make you feel bad because he's had a drink. That's his problem. <:)> hugs sweetie. And try and rise above this.
be selfish in your sobriety.

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pickles
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Re: Our kids

Post by pickles » 12 Jan 2017 11:38

.
Last edited by pickles on 18 Dec 2017 02:10, edited 1 time in total.
' Normal ' is just a setting on the washing machine .

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DannyD
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Re: Our kids

Post by DannyD » 12 Jan 2017 17:18

I suspect that he feels guilty - which is why he was shouting at you. Attack being the best form of defence and so on. Keep your head high <:)>
be selfish in your sobriety.

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