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The relationship I have with myself.......

Partners, families, children and friends - they all get affected by your drinking.
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Sandy
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Re: The relationship I have with myself.......

Post by Sandy » 23 Sep 2018 12:30

joanne. wrote:
22 Sep 2018 14:20
I’ve been waitin in that loft an that hos ridin vagabond keeps me pants nailed to the rafters....‘‘tis lucky the lastic snapped an I mades me escape.

Ahoy any wanton Trollops jus sayin hello \:)/
Well hello to you too my lovely
so good to see you!

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joanne.
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Re: The relationship I have with myself.......

Post by joanne. » 23 Sep 2018 12:34

Sandy me tottering be-heeled wench, yoo is lookin very fetchin this moist afternoon :D
Don’t judge me.... I was born to be Awesome, not Perfect.

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Newt
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Re: The relationship I have with myself.......

Post by Newt » 23 Sep 2018 12:43

Jo rightfully wrote:I see yoo have adopted the correct colouration for a slippery fellow


Slimy little git more like :roll: Yep I've upgraded to being forum nuisance and guaranteed pain in the arse ;)?
Social distancing since 1966

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silvergirl
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Re: The relationship I have with myself.......

Post by silvergirl » 26 Sep 2018 06:51

Jebus creeping how did I miss this?! Jojo my love, I thought we had mass hallucinated your perfection but nay! Here ye stand before us, flexing those fingers and having fabulousness flow. Fantastic to see you. Draw up a chair, coorie in and bide a while. :D

\:)/ xsgx
you can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.
~jon kabat-zinn

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joanne.
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Re: The relationship I have with myself.......

Post by joanne. » 30 Sep 2018 23:45

Most delectable silvery wench of a vastly northern persuasion, may your haggi be ever palatable :D I is hopin that is appropriate welcomin of the madamoiselle d’argent. How the devils are yoos? Has bin a while since me fingers have wandered in this general direction, but I is developin a kinder more wanton friend in meself an I thought to just contemplate me navel on the sometimes ;)
Don’t judge me.... I was born to be Awesome, not Perfect.

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joanne.
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Re: The relationship I have with myself.......

Post by joanne. » 30 Sep 2018 23:50

And the newt so glad to see yoo havin the knowin of yaself ;)
Don’t judge me.... I was born to be Awesome, not Perfect.

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Cowboy
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Re: The relationship I have with myself.......

Post by Cowboy » 01 Oct 2018 16:19

I always thought you were a kinder more wanton friend Jo and it's great to see y'all back.
The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why. Mark Twain.

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joanne.
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Re: The relationship I have with myself.......

Post by joanne. » 04 Oct 2018 00:15

So me special hoss ridin vagabond are you Keepin out of mischief?
Don’t judge me.... I was born to be Awesome, not Perfect.

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Cowboy
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Re: The relationship I have with myself.......

Post by Cowboy » 04 Oct 2018 00:49

Not really but I'm sober and that's a good thing. Haven't had a decent roll in the hay in a coons age though.

How you keeping my spotty pants amiga?
The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why. Mark Twain.

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joanne.
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Re: The relationship I have with myself.......

Post by joanne. » 10 Oct 2018 18:27

I seems to be busier in a ways, which helps the brain thinking. I still have me own set of ladders for that loft bu I reckon these Wilmington have been more than busy with ya chaps ;)
Don’t judge me.... I was born to be Awesome, not Perfect.

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Mark.
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Re: The relationship I have with myself.......

Post by Mark. » 10 Oct 2018 18:46

Cowboy and I had a go at (ahem) "contacting" you in the loft awhile ago, Jo, but things didn't turn out great.

But we tried. Believe me - we tried... ;)

I think if I twist my head just a little further I can see a pair of spotty... ARGHHHHH!!!].jpg
I think if I twist my head just a little further I can see a pair of spotty... ARGHHHHH!!!].jpg (35.54 KiB) Viewed 1935 times
joanne. wrote:
10 Oct 2018 18:27
I seems to be busier in a ways, which helps the brain thinking.
Sounds good <:)>
Nie chwal dnia przed zachodem słońca.

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Cowboy
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Re: The relationship I have with myself.......

Post by Cowboy » 13 Oct 2018 12:30

Good one JJ. What a team of bumblers we are eh?

Great to hear that you are doing well Jo. We miss you in these parts.

My relationship with myself is taking a big turn without alcohol in the equation. A lot of introspection about where I am and where I am going in my life. It's good. Good to not drown out those feelings of inadequacy with alcohol. The inner critic is still there but not making as much of a racket then when I am drunk and he gets in there and thinks he owns the place. He doesn't own the place. I do. And I am much better without alcohol in so many ways. Me and my relationship have some fences to mend but at least we have the tools to do it.
The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why. Mark Twain.

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Mark.
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Re: The relationship I have with myself.......

Post by Mark. » 14 Oct 2018 10:18

Great post, Cowboy ;)?
Nie chwal dnia przed zachodem słońca.

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Cowboy
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Re: The relationship I have with myself.......

Post by Cowboy » 14 Oct 2018 12:52

Thanks JJ.

It's amazing how I have allowed alcohol to filter my feelings for as practically as long as I have been an adult. Quitting drinking removes the blinders and reveals a whole new and, for me, very scary world. The good news is that the farther you get away from the drinking days the easier it is to deal with that scary world. These days it's the anxiety. Full on anxiety. How will this turn out - how will that turn out - how will I ever get this done. All that worry and thoughts to the future and what is going to happen rather than what good and what is happening. I am sober and that is a good. I keep bringing myself back to that one theme. I know in my heart that if I continue on the sober road everything will come together and even if it doesn't? I will be better equipped to deal with it because I will be sober. It's just so hard some days. These days are hard but I know I will get through cause I've done it before.
The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why. Mark Twain.

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Re: The relationship I have with myself.......

Post by Spats » 14 Oct 2018 21:13

Good post! I can relate so well with you there cowboy. I’ve been on here for over a year now and I’m still on 7 days. I did actually manage to get ont 2-4 weeks but lapsed again and so it’s always been. What to do now? Well I think I’ve finally worked out what my problem is. I’m afraid of taking that final step, I suppose in case things aren’t what they’re cracked up to be. Sounds ridiculous because I know I’ll be ok. Everyone else is aren’t they - those who have managed that leap of faith. I can quote so many who have far more complex lives and conditions, I don’t fall into that category, I just find it so hard to stop. So here’s my plan - I was ok yesterday, but sleepy and lazy; and I’ve been ok today and active. Tomorrow never comes so I’ll just see what the new day brings and deal with it. After all if something happens in the morning I don’t immediately grab a bottle of wine. I’m rambling now but I needed to get that down in writing. Need to know how to bookmark this now :roll:

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joanne.
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Re: The relationship I have with myself.......

Post by joanne. » 14 Oct 2018 22:16

Blimey swift postlings and spell checkin, what the freak is a Wilmington? Cowboy an his wimmin....an his chaps are leg coverin thingies. Spell check me ya wanton fecker of a pc... 8-)

Jjjjjjjj I felt ya lookin at me pants, peekin in the loft ;) naughty sod

Cowboy me majestic beast, there’s good wordies in ya an I reckon soberiness has the makin of yoos. The bit is to find the loft more often.....to start the livin. Alcohol is the slowest death, a death of forgotten moments, times. ‘‘Tis a useless fecker of a bedfellow an I don’t know if at some point I might allow the useless shite to dwindle me brain cells some more, but for the moment sober romps in the loft are pretty awesome ;)
admittin that the witless dope i become when losin life to the drinkin, is not summat to feel proud of, an makin the most of me sober pants is all I can do. Truth is when pissed I fall off the ladder and never even make it to the loft of lust 8-) what a waste of a woman in pants....
An truth is jjjjjjjj would just steal me pants an then I’d not be me, and that would mean I’d have to be watching him wearin them like superman an no drinks worth the vision of that. :mrgreen:

So enjoy it me gorgeous man, enjoy the wonders of sober, ‘tis an adventure to be sure.

Spats....why is yoo not afraid of the drinkin?
Don’t judge me.... I was born to be Awesome, not Perfect.

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Cowboy
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Re: The relationship I have with myself.......

Post by Cowboy » 15 Oct 2018 11:14

Hi Spats. Life with booze is most definitely not what it's "cracked up to be". Those commercials about the happy beautiful people sipping their wine or drinking their beer on some exotic beach are all bullshit. More like hugging a bottle in some dark and lonely existence.
Sobriety is real and it's there for the taking. Nothing more to it really. Just jump on that horse and ride.

Jo. That was beautiful and inspiring. I am willing to put up with all of the challenges that come with sobriety because the payoff is huge. You are so right about alcohol being the slowest death and there is much more to live for than that next drink. Living life in the loft needs to be the next priority as work has got me waking up and not looking forward to the day. Anxious about the day is a matter of fact and I need to get that behind me and those feelings need to be crushed. It sounds like you are doing well and I really enjoy hearing your thoughts around sobriety. And that visual of JJ wearing your pants like superman is just too much to take.

My relationship with myself is coming more and more into focus with each passing sober day. The booze googles are off and it's hard to deal with some of the other thoughts and stuff crowding my head atm but I know I'm getting there. I can feel it.
The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why. Mark Twain.

Spats
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Re: The relationship I have with myself.......

Post by Spats » 15 Oct 2018 22:02

Thanks jo and cowboy ;)? My life is starting to move on now. Or rather I should say that I’m allowing my life to move on. One last decision I made was to finish working with my client on the 31st. Take a break and then look for something else in the new year. Now starting to excercise and making the effort - found a Parkrun to do with others. Everything is getting me away from isolation. The latest is accepting that whatever the reason for drinking it always turns out wrong. If I’m happy or celebrating - next day (or even 2 days) it’s the pits (w) If I’m feeling down, angry, lonely, tired - the next day I’m 10 times worse. I must be really dumb - I’ve only recently realised that. But one reason is that there is someone who does care now. <:)>

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Cowboy
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Re: The relationship I have with myself.......

Post by Cowboy » 16 Oct 2018 11:28

Spats wrote:
15 Oct 2018 22:02
The latest is accepting that whatever the reason for drinking it always turns out wrong.
Spats. This is, by far, one of the most important lessons for me to learn in dealing with my relationship with myself. In a career of drinking that spans close to 40 years I have never, ever woken up a morning after drinking and felt in any way good about it. Never. Oh yeah we always wake up and feel like crap and make fun of one another for feeling like shit but do we enjoy the feeling? Nope. Hang in there, do whatever you want that doesn't include drinking and get those sober muscles tuned up.

Me? Am I worried about my diet atm? Nope. Am I running and/or exercising? Nope. Just getting through those first couple of months sober is all I am concentrating on. Many folks in these parts say that they key to success on the road to sobriety is finding a replacement for drinking. I believe them and that is my plan. But for now my plan is simple. Every day - no drinking. I am getting there.

Hi Jo. I'm up in the loft - all alone. It's just not the same without my spotty pants girl. JJ just doesn't quite cut it. Sorry JJ.

Cowboy.
The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why. Mark Twain.

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Mark.
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Re: The relationship I have with myself.......

Post by Mark. » 16 Oct 2018 12:21

Cowboy wrote:
16 Oct 2018 11:28
JJ just doesn't quite cut it. Sorry JJ.
What, not even when I'm dressed as Superman? :shock: :? :lol:

Seriously, although I haven't found the time to say anything sensible here, I have been appreciating the wisdom of the posts here. I'll try to contribute more.

I hope Jo, Cowboy, Spats (and anyone else reading) that you're all having a good day ;)?
Nie chwal dnia przed zachodem słońca.

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