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The Six Month Challenge

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Ed
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Re: The Six Month Challenge

Post by Ed » 11 Mar 2019 08:38

4 months sober today. Not sleeping very well.
Enough time wasted on this.

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Cowboy
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Re: The Six Month Challenge

Post by Cowboy » 11 Mar 2019 11:30

Must admit I had to push myself through a week at 4 months or so Ed. Carry on amigo. It gets better - much better.

You enjoy that time with your grandkids fiz. I'm sure they love being with their grandmother and vice versa.
The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why. Mark Twain.

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Ed
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Re: The Six Month Challenge

Post by Ed » 12 Mar 2019 07:51

Thanks cowboy. Slept better last night. 10 to 4 then 5 to 8. I have a lovely mattress at home unfortunately I haven't been at home for 10 months!

Yesterday was tough. I am working as a freelancer but my main client at the moment wants to treat me like an employee without offering any of the pesky rights and benefits.
Enough time wasted on this.

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fiz
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Re: The Six Month Challenge

Post by fiz » 12 Mar 2019 16:31

I love spending time with the grandchildren Cowboy. I have to confess to spoiling them too. I figure, all of the other stuff is the parents job, been there, done that, I just get the nice part now. :lol:

Ed, keep pushing through. Hang on to that first day feeling. :cry: I went back and read my 7 day start again today. I was so desperate I was considering AA. I don’t want to feel that low ever again.

It’s cold here, but beautiful, snow drops everywhere. ❤️
Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.

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fiz
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Re: The Six Month Challenge

Post by fiz » 15 Mar 2019 06:10

Nearly cracked last night. Felt really low, was exhausted physically, mentally and emotionally, I wanted wine, but made myself drive straight home. I was having a full blown out row with myself, not to go to the shop on the way, and I don’t just mean in my head, I thought I had lost the plot completely.
Got home and took out a becks blue and necked it, then another, sat and enjoyed that one, then wemt for a third, and felt so guilty, I felt like I’d let myself down, that I was weak, I’d crumbled, then remembered, they are alcohol free.
I had put those beers in my fridge four months ago, but had been afraid to give them a go in case they made me want to drink. Well, I can’t tell you how relieved I was to remember I wasn’t drinking alcohol, especially this morning.
So, today, I’m away out to replace them, just incase.
It’s also made me feel even better about my weekend away with the girls, I can sit and drink that, no bother and feel like I’m in the loop.
The last time I tried af beer, was a lot of years ago, and i think it was called caliber, it should have been labels nats piss, it was vile. If someone had given me becks blue without the label, I would have thought it was becks. That’s also one of the reasons I bought beer instead of wine, I very rarely drink beer, so it’s harder for me to compare.
Have a great day y’all.
Feeling fresh, and hangover free.
Day 117 ;)?
Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.

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Ed
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Re: The Six Month Challenge

Post by Ed » 15 Mar 2019 06:51

Well done Fiz. That's a big achievement. Every time you beat it you're stronger for the next time.
Enough time wasted on this.

Dapps
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Re: The Six Month Challenge

Post by Dapps » 15 Mar 2019 08:52

hi all

Well done Fiz that’s great - well swerved. (::) I also use Af beer & wine when out or having a massive craving. I had a bad day a week ago and found I had drunk 3 glasses of AF red wine .... I felt ridiculous as it was in the house and it feels a little crazy downing ‘red’ wine for the hit 😃. Didn’t happen but kept me sober & that’s the main point .

day 94 here and that’s the longest I have done so feeling excited & nervous. All good but still bone tired perhaps to need to cut out the sweet stuff which has escalated.

Hi Ed hope you are managing to get some better sleep and enjoy the cats - we have a new kitten that is a delight

Hope you all have a good day
Dapps

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Re: The Six Month Challenge

Post by Johnnyb » 15 Mar 2019 10:19

I will be with you on the 28th. That becks blue plan sounds good. I seem to be over the cravings although sometimes circumsances tell me i need a drink but the new path prevails.
YOU NEVER STOP FAILING UNTIL YOU STOP TRYING ----- Albert Einstein

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Re: The Six Month Challenge

Post by Cowboy » 15 Mar 2019 11:10

So glad to see you pushed through fiz. You keep getting stronger and stronger. You go girl.
The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why. Mark Twain.

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Ed
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Re: The Six Month Challenge

Post by Ed » 15 Mar 2019 14:47

Thanks Dapps. Congrats on your 94 days. First 3 months over and done with. The sweet stuff is hard. Especially in the afternoon and evening and of course that's what helps to upset sleep. I've got a lovely Calico cat nestling on my arm at the moment. She doesn't usually seek me out but she loves attention. I feel honoured. Daft isn't it?

Nice to see a bit of action on this thread! Hello to fiz, Johnny and cowboy.
Enough time wasted on this.

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fiz
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Re: The Six Month Challenge

Post by fiz » 15 Mar 2019 15:16

Well, off I went to work, and this place got so busy. (::) good to see you all.
Dapps 94 days is fantastic, well done. \:)/
Looking forward to you joining us on the 28th johnnyb
Feeling stronger Cowboy 🤠 thanks for having my back for god knows how many years. <:)>
I think you are turning into a true cat lover Ed? And, you are very honoured that the cat wants to be with you. ;)?
Have a great weekend every one. X
Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.

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Ed
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Re: The Six Month Challenge

Post by Ed » 15 Mar 2019 18:23

When the cat was nuzzling up to me I remembered an old carry on film, and I read out the horses in the Cheltenham gold cup. You will not believe this but she picked the winner by miaowing and bunting me. I put £10 on it, I don't usually bet by the way, I won £120. She is being spoilt rotten tonight.
Enough time wasted on this.

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fiz
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Re: The Six Month Challenge

Post by fiz » 17 Mar 2019 06:20

Ed, you need to do more of your betting with the cat. (::)

Well, this is my weekend away that I was so anxious about with a group of drinking friends. They were all drinking as usual, I stayed on my becks blue, it didn’t bother me at all, and not one person questioned me, they either didn’t notice I wasn’t drinking, or didn’t care. Still had a nice night, but, I was the first to to say goodnight and go to bed, I’m also the first one up. \:)/
That’s one challand completed, next time I’ll not be so worried about it.
Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.

Dapps
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Re: The Six Month Challenge

Post by Dapps » 17 Mar 2019 10:46

Well done Fiz - it’s great to get those tricky occasions under our belt. For me it feels like I can have a social life having Af beer but I am also the first to leave . There’s only so much you can take around the alcohol. I am also feeling chuffed as I managed a family birthday do at the weekend without drinking. It was a party with people who didn’t know I had stopped . I used driving to take all the gear home as the reason so no comments . It feels good to have got through it.

I am so exhausted I am still in bed with tea, biscuits and the dog 😁. Great treat - loving it & no remorse& self loathing over what I did. That is such a blessing from not drinking.

Ed - loved the cat choosing the winners - made me laugh out loud 😊. Must try that with the grand national !

(::) Johnnyb looking forward to you joining the thread - might need to bring a pet with you - as we all seem to have cats and dogs.

Hope you all have a great Sunday \:)/

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fiz
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Re: The Six Month Challenge

Post by fiz » 20 Mar 2019 05:30

Dapps, I’m well impressed with becks blue, I think I’m going to try a few others. I won’t be so anxious on my next social occasion. Although, I do agree, there’s only so much time you can spend around drinkers, so an escape plan has to be always in place, before I get there.
Well, I’m on day 123 just thought I’d mark that one. I think it’s roughly 16 weeks. When I first quit, I knew it by the hour, day week, but now I forget, it’s a nice place to be. I really hope, a silly permission thought, doesn’t spoil all this hard work, I have to make sure that doesn’t happen, last time I fell off the wagon it took me nearly a whole year to get back on it.
I don’t want to be known as the “big drinker”, “good laugh” or “embarrassment” I’ve been all three and more.
Onwards and upwards. Have a lovely sober, hangover free day. <:)>
Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.

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Re: The Six Month Challenge

Post by Dapps » 21 Mar 2019 09:18

morning all

Trying to get my head into a calmer space today ... been really struggling the last couple of days . By the evening I move to a place of ‘ I don’t care’- I just want a drink very badly. Not helped by attending a funeral of someone the same age as me . I went to the do afterwards & only had soft drink as my husband ordered it. Stayed 5 mins & left - too dangerous :shock:

All strange as I am on day 100 today which is a first - but it is all feeling a real struggle - even thinking about it in the morning when I am not a day drinker (w)

Hope you are all having a better day - how’s the cats Ed and like you Fiz , I don’t want to start all over again.

Planning to have a day doing house tasks slowly & get out with the dog
Dapps

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Ed
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Re: The Six Month Challenge

Post by Ed » 21 Mar 2019 15:11

I am struggling a bit here. It looks like the UK is leaving the EU without an agreement which means that I will be in France without status and my partner on return to the UK will be without status as she is swedish. We're basically humped. I'm so angry, I'm angry at my parents who voted for this despite thinking highly of my partner. I'm almost angry enough to drink, nearly 5 months sober. And that makes me even angrier.
Enough time wasted on this.

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fiz
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Re: The Six Month Challenge

Post by fiz » 22 Mar 2019 09:35

Good morning Ed, Dapps and anyone looking in.

Ed, I don’t know what the answer is to all this crap that’s going on in politics atm. What I do know, is you have put 5 long, hard af months under your belt, and the answer to it all, isn’t at the bottom of a bottle. In fact, I bet your partner is really proud of you, and loving the sober you even more than before. Don’t blow it Ed. Use everything in your survival toolbox to side step these thoughts. You would wake up the next day, feeling hungover and full of regret, and the problem is still there.
We are all here for you Ed, and right behind you, please don’t let anger, frustration, worry, take from you, that you have worked so hard to gain.
Go stroke a cat, take a walk, a bath sometimes helps me. Stay on here all day if necessary. <:)>
Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.

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fiz
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Re: The Six Month Challenge

Post by fiz » 22 Mar 2019 09:38

Dapps, I felt exactly the same on 100 days, I’m not sure if I expect more? But it just left me a bit flat, however, once you push through that 100 days, it just keeps getting better, and it’s a great number to reach. Well done. \:)/ Keep going. ;)?
Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.

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Ed
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Re: The Six Month Challenge

Post by Ed » 22 Mar 2019 14:18

Thanks fiz. Actually I'm talking rollocks it's less than 4 and a half months! What is it they say, that a lapse or relapse is a long time in the making, well I guess I might be in the germination phase. I suppose it's like a lot of people the 'is this it?' feeling. In my case it's a bit that the fog has cleared to reveal something other than sunlit uplands. I'm pretty sure I'm clinically depressed, I'm not sleeping well. My life situation is the result of alcohol and mental health issues and although not that bad, it's not great. My partner is also depressed but almost entirely dependent on me - unable to make decisions or function properly. I work as a freelancer and my main source of income treats me like an employee without any of the benefits of employment with all the downsides. I'm pretty skilled and people with my skills and experience are usually making good money but I am getting emails, starting a timer, fixing a problem, stopping the timer. So I might have my morning disturbed to do 6 minutes work.
I've got nearly constant low level pain from what was tentatively diagnosed as osteoarthritis, I've got cubital tunnel syndrome which may or may not be related to the general pain and I've run out of energy trying to get it sorted abroad. And there is brexit which means I'll have to sort out my partner's administrative life again, as there's not a cats chance in hell she'll do it for herself.

A few drinks and I could forget all this for a few hours. And the logic to that is indisputable.

Harumph.
Enough time wasted on this.

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