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Re: The Two and Three Month Challenge

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Analyn
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Re: The Two Month Challenge

Post by Analyn » 07 Feb 2015 20:35

Finley, glad to see you but so sorry re your little granddaughter, it is a horrible thing and hard to adjust to.
Bent - so sorry you are still struggling, it's usually you trying to help others. Re that glass of red wine, it would not be lone for long if you are like me? It would soon have similar looking company?! :roll: Tomorrow you would feel devastated. I know you won't buy any ;)?
Clovis, tomorrow is another day, feel better <:)>
Rose, I am still itching too!! :twisted: it will just stop one day soon, I am sure of it!!
Just enjoyed nice cuppa of camomile tea, wish I could sleep though.... :o

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bentnotbrokenwings
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Re: The Two Month Challenge

Post by bentnotbrokenwings » 08 Feb 2015 00:07

Checking in, happy to say I made it to the hardware store and back with only the parts I needed. Fixed the wheelbarrow and worked until the sun set. Back is sore and I am dog tired, but more importantly, I am not having the wobbles. Feeling back to how I was 2 days ago, strong and confident. Perhaps for me, I just need to dive into a strenuous project and work until I wear myself out when these thoughts come along. Not sure where the grouchies came from, but won't focus on it tonight as I don't want them to return. Will re-evaluate when feeling back on track. And, I am watching that movie tonight, even if I do fall asleep in the middle of it from whooping my own tail in the yard today!!
Analyn you are correct, and that is why it scares me. I know for me, there is no just one drink. And if I give in just one night, it will weaken me over the next week or two until I have a full blown out binger (past experience of the last 4 months of last year proved that).
Joh good to see you, hope you had a nice time today chicken window shopping LOL I am realizing I have so much work out in the pastures as it is, I am going to put off adding anything else to the mix for now. But you will be the first one I drive crazy with questions when I am ready ;-)
Clovis, thanks for the reminder, yes, if we feel this grumpy today, just imagine how we will feel hung over tomorrow :twisted: Not worth it, today was way to blah for me, don't want to repeat or worsen it.
Finley, so sorry to hear about your grandbaby, hopefully everything will turn out ok. Scary to be diagnosed at such a young age, but at least it's a diet and other adjustments she will learn growing up with rather than a diagnosis later in life and have to adapt everything she's used to. Will be tough on Mom and Dad, but it's amazing what parents can do for their children when it becomes a need. Hope you can stay strong for all this, it certainly is a lot to take on at once. <:)>
Fresh, hope pup adjusts well, she should enjoy a change of scenery and time with mom, although may wish there was a couch there ;-) My dogs are indoors, although I do have straw in dog houses outside in the yard I let them out in. They do enjoy a good rolling around in it and play for quite a while out there, but eventually they are ready to come in.... well all but one, the shepherd, she prefers the great outdoors LOL Glad you got to enjoy a nice sunset, it's those little things I try to focus on and appreciate to help me get through this struggle. Something so simple can really lift your spirits and make you realize life is really beautiful if you stop to take it in when you can :-)
Rose, sometimes it takes some a little longer for their bodies to adjust. Also try not to go "looking for it", it's like watching grass grow :-) You will wake up one morning and feel it, and someone around you will compliment and say, wow, you look so healthy today, glowing, clear skin, no more dark eyes, happy. It's coming <:)> I still have groggy days too, where I just feel out of it. I'll be in the middle of doing something and completely zone out, like what was I just doing? Even been in mid conversation and my mind just goes blank as to what we were discussing. Not often, but it's happen a few times now. I have read others post about similar things even when driving, so just take it easy and do your best to focus on the task at hand, don't get too far ahead of yourself in thought. I try to look at it as we have all just planted a new flower seed (ourselves with sobriety) and we have to be very delicate and careful with it. Just enough water but not too much, just enough sun but not too much, etc. A very delicate process at first until we begin to bloom new colors. And even then, we still require water and sunlight, some plant food and a delicate caretaker.
<:)> to all, going to look around on here a bit and then change into jammies and watch that movie!! Hope all have (had, keep forgetting I am behind most of you time wise) a wonderful night, and enjoy a beautiful morning!
It's not anxiety,it's alcohol.It's not depression,it's alcohol.It's not a miserable life,it's alcohol.When u make a choice to drink it,you also make a choice to have anxiety,be depressed,and have a miserable existence.Make better choices.

Zandra 1
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Re: The Two Month Challenge

Post by Zandra 1 » 08 Feb 2015 07:25

DAY 36 Hi all \:)/ look's like yesterday was an 'AAARRGGHH! :shock: ! day for a few of us where drink is involved :roll: i also had a craving window which I'm definitely not going to act on no matter how bad it gets as i'm in deep shite without putting anymore idiot load on my back :roll: I had a Beer !!, Fag!! episode which were bought on by the depth of withdrawal from the other crap (Valium) and also no doubt being AF and SF, but the want to escape the Valium withdrawal is hard.

I can't f-ing get out and am just about able to move around indoor's, and lack of sleep is getting worse and so is the getting anxious depressed pain along with a myriad of symptoms,and wondering as to wtf is next? The list of WD symptoms from this crap is long , horrendous, and i keep forgetting I'm also dealing with stopping the drink, Cigs, and the last of my painkillers as well. So its a lot of cards in the deck. But like everyone else my 'escape' from suffering the WD from the meds was to think f-it!! i can't handle it and get drunk, not realising i was making matter's much worse. :mrgreen:

And adding to the suffering and giving my brain, body, and neurons a bashing on top of a bashing?? Its amazing what you learn about Human biology and neurology when your looking for answer's, i knew quite a bit before, but unfortunately not what i NEEDED to know. But to my regret i sure f-ing know now, and sometimes wish i never knew so much, but that being said not ALL ignorance is bliss. :D

And it can be down right dangerous if your unaware of just how bad things can get when your in withdrawal/ recovery/ and believe that you need to go back to drinking or up dosing on anything and everything to make it stop. That's the worse belief ever, and yes, sometimes it can get so bad you try offing yourself, you see it here on BE where people get so desperate between drinking and not drinking ,or withdrawals and reinstating time and time again. :?

Or believing that another chemical is the answer to break free from another one but its just swopping one problem for another. So i suppose the moral of the story as hard as you think it is now it may get worse before it gets better, but go backwards then its really going to get a LOT worse every time so be glad to be where you are now it will improve over time.

Love to everyone Zandra xxx <:)>
Make the best use of what is in your power, and take the rest as it happens.
Epictetus

All philosophy in two words, — sustain and abstain.
Epictetus

Born to rock and roll
not roll rock bottom
by Zandra

Rose13
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Re: The Two Month Challenge

Post by Rose13 » 08 Feb 2015 08:01

Thank you CLOVIS for your reply to my post yesterday. ;)? I guess 5 weeks off the booze is not long to recover from 23 years drinking!! i need to learn patience me thinks! its going to take time!
I made it through another saturday night! This weekend has been particularly tough!
I hope you all doing ok AF buddies

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bentnotbrokenwings
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Re: The Two Month Challenge

Post by bentnotbrokenwings » 08 Feb 2015 11:04

Zandra, very very true. Replacing one habit with another is not recovering, it's just swapping it up. Your brain still isn't healing, your body isn't adjusting, other than they both are just getting used to another substance screwing around in there. Sorry you are having to go through so much at once, I can't even fathom quitting smoking right now b/c how hard it is just to not drink. You are incredible for taking on all three and succeeding!! \:)/
Rose, it is very true. Many folks on here will tell you, it takes X amount of time to get where you were with your drinking, it's going to take A LOT of time to get back to feeling good again. Not to mention the dreaded thought we all avoid, any permanent damage we have done to ourselves by drinking for so long, that sadly will be there for life, we will just have to learn how to cope and live with it. Glad you made it through the weekend hun, it is tough, but gets a little easier with every battle you win. You bank it and go back to it later, 'well I made it that one weekend I struggled, boy it was hard but I did it, so I can do it again this time.' Time, patience, self-care and learning to love yourself again will all take time, but it comes and helps you more and more as you progress through this. Keep going strong Rose, you can do it!! \:)/
Joh, I am so craving scrambled eggs this morning, but can't get the thought of wrapping my precious grand-eggs in bubble wrap out of my head LOL The mere thought of purposely cracking an egg has me on a cereal diet lately ;-) Perhaps I should try that with wine bottles...... ha, who am I kidding, I'd crack that bugger in a second after the fact ;-)
<:)> to all , wishing you a Great Sunday!!
It's not anxiety,it's alcohol.It's not depression,it's alcohol.It's not a miserable life,it's alcohol.When u make a choice to drink it,you also make a choice to have anxiety,be depressed,and have a miserable existence.Make better choices.

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Re: The Two Month Challenge

Post by Rose13 » 08 Feb 2015 11:36

thanks BNBW, wishing you and everyone else on here a great sunday too
x

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Re: The Two Month Challenge

Post by Rose13 » 08 Feb 2015 11:37

Zandra you are amaziingly strong <:)>

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wannabenormal
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Re: The Two Month Challenge

Post by wannabenormal » 08 Feb 2015 14:35

Hello everyone
Glad to see that the gaggle is keeping its head above water - congrats to all ;)?
I said I would be a bit in the background. I have made day 35 and I think the worst is in the past alcoholwise.

Not been posting very much - but been reading .... Not been posting much as I have been in the dumps and don't want to cast a grey blanket here ...

Good luck to all and it looks like deep down you will all make it ;)?

I think I will too - but I just have to grin and bear it at the moment not much else to do but ride the wave

take care
You can only Taper once : Second time around your body knows what you are up to.
What doesn't kill you: only makes you strong .
Don't let the sound of your own wheels drive you crazy

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Finley
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Re: The Two Month Challenge

Post by Finley » 08 Feb 2015 14:40

Thanks all - Trina it was especially helpful to hear your experience <:)>

Well folks - I drank last night (3 glasses of wine) so I guess that's me out of the 2 month challenge. Made it to 38 days this time and am proud of that.....will spend a little time regrouping and then decide whether to post on challenges again. Thanks to all for the massive support and hope it's a smashing sober Sunday for all xx
I want to be the best me I can be ...

jaxom7

Re: The Two Month Challenge

Post by jaxom7 » 08 Feb 2015 14:59

Hi Finners. You have been doing extremely well, not just over the last 38 days but for much, much longer than that and you seem to be largely happy being AF. Obviously it is up to you and only you to decide what happens next but I just wanted to remind you of what Tobin said in the first post of Guidelines for Sobriety Challenges. A slip does not mean you have to duck out of a challenge. Mistakes should be tolerated. Hardly a binge session was it!

From reading your posts I am convinced that your 'recovery head' is way beyond the First 7 so even if you want to take time out from the challenges then maybe you could consider jumping back in here or even on a later challenge when you are ready? It is all to easy to think of recovery as a continous string of AF days stretching from Day 1 and a slip is a 'Go To Start' button. It isn't. My own recovery has consisted of AF stretches with lapses here and there so although I am currently plowing through my second year AF I consider my recovery to be nearly 4 years old, dating from when I got really serious about this. The AF stretches are simply evidence of progress, not the progress itself.

Take care, stay strong, stay safe ;)?

Dave

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Finley
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Re: The Two Month Challenge

Post by Finley » 08 Feb 2015 15:03

Thanks Dave <:)>
I want to be the best me I can be ...

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Re: The Two Month Challenge

Post by joholdbrook » 08 Feb 2015 16:05

Fin I have to agree with dave here you don't need to go back to day one a few glasses isn't the end of your battle as you want to carry on with it just take a few days to get over it and carry on where you left off its a blip nothing more take care x

What a lovely day feels like spring is here I no to early arranged to have a break in Ireland this year and see my family looking forward to seeing them so much

Bent I may candle the eggs tonight see if I can if there any good I am praying xx
Je suis prest

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Topcat
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Re: The Two Month Challenge

Post by Topcat » 08 Feb 2015 16:06

Great post Dave (::) (::)

I particularly related to this...
jaxom7 wrote:My own recovery has consisted of AF stretches with lapses here and there so although I am currently plowing through my second year AF I consider my recovery to be nearly 4 years old, dating from when I got really serious about this. The AF stretches are simply evidence of progress, not the progress itself.
My own recovery started long before my last drink date. It started from the moment I acknowledged I had a problem and knew I had to do something about it. OK, I took a long, long, time to finally get the hang of this sobriety malarky, but I kept trying to quit and, each time I did, I got closer and closer to keeping off the stuff for good. Lessons were learnt and notes were made. It all came together eventually (thank goodness and thanks to the lovely people on BE) and I stopped and have managed to stay stopped ;)? I have high hopes that situation will continue (I do not like the alternative one little bit).

Finners - a blip is not a relapse. Do whatever you feel is right. You've come so far since you first joined BE <:)> <:)>
#5 on the 2020 Challenge
Today is our most precious possession.

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Finley
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Re: The Two Month Challenge

Post by Finley » 08 Feb 2015 16:38

Thanks Jo and TC <:)> I do feel I've come a long way since joining BE - and thank goodness for the wonderful support I've had here - unstinting, constant support from people who really know how it is. I am not 'giving up giving up' - and I won't go back to Day One as I'm not there in my mind - I'm several weeks of AF experience away from that (more if I count my other fairly good AF stints) and it's absolutely right that I can learn from those experiences all the time.

Thanks again all <:)>

I'm making a very comforting dinner tonight - mince n onions with mash and loads & loads of veg - so packed with goodness too. Just the thing to set me right. It's astonishing how 'bad' I feel (ie hungover) from what was, by comparison with my drinking pre-BE (which was about 1.5 bottles of wine a night, EVERY night), a fairly moderate amount. I've no intention of feeling like this tomorrow :)
I want to be the best me I can be ...

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Re: The Two Month Challenge

Post by fresh-start » 08 Feb 2015 16:45

Finners, I'm with Topcat, Dave and Jo! Stay with us if it feels right as its just one blip! <:)>

Yes Jo, what a gorgeous day! Collected pup from her B&B, she seems fairly unscathed. :D

Took her to a little seaside village for a run on the beach and then we've been out washing the cars and she was running around with the little critters (kids) in the cul-de-sac and a Cocker Spaniel from a few doors up! She's had a whale of a time!

She's crashed out now on the settee and being very well behaved. It won't last.... and if it did I'd be worried! :D

Got my washing dry on the line for the first time this year. Spring is definitely round the corner folks! ;)?

No drink cravings today but still have thoughts of drinking on holiday. 12 weeks yet though, anything could happen by then.

x
#10 on the 2020 Challenge

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Clovis
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Re: The Two Month Challenge

Post by Clovis » 08 Feb 2015 17:31

Hi all
Feeling a lot less grumpy today and enjoyed a pleasant pm walking by the river in Henley with Mrs Clovis.
Finley, keep with us, I love reading your posts!
Zandra, look after yourself and thanks for all the tips!
Jo - you are doing great!
Wannabe- don't be a stranger!
Rose, I felt crap yesterday and good today for no particular reason....who knows why? Hope you are good today!
Freshie, I've got two weeks in Brazil on holiday closely followed by three week business trip to Beijing, Shanghai and HK. Historically the business trip has been a massive piss up after meetings have finished so I'm trying to prepare myself early so this doesn't happen again.
BNBW, keeping busy distracts us from tipping the ale or wine down our throats. Well done!
Have a good eve all
Clovis x

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Re: The Two Month Challenge

Post by George » 08 Feb 2015 18:38

Evening all

Quite pleased with myself tonight, this is the last day of the fifth week sober. Think that I'll pour myself a large glass of ......................... orange juice and proudly drink to that :D

Hope that all is well - sleep tight peeps ;)?
“Now I’m sober and I realize, I didn’t drink to escape the world, I drank to escape myself”
― Phil Volatile, Crushed Black Velvet

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Clovis
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Re: The Two Month Challenge

Post by Clovis » 08 Feb 2015 18:49

Well done George!
It's a good feeling as the weeks begin to pass.....
It's something that seemed impossible not so long ago...

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fresh-start
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Re: The Two Month Challenge

Post by fresh-start » 08 Feb 2015 18:55

Well done George!

Wow Clove! HK, Beijing and Shanghai! You lucky thing!

Mr Fresh and I were supposed to go and live in Dubai and then Kuwait last year but it didn't come off right at the last minute. We were gutted. I loved our stint in Amsterdam and am keen to go overseas again.

Mr Fresh been looking at new job opportunities and one involves possible work overseas with an expatriate package so trying to persuade him to try for it. His choice of course, he'd be working and I'd be a lady of leisure again! Those were the days! :D
#10 on the 2020 Challenge

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Analyn
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Re: The Two Month Challenge

Post by Analyn » 08 Feb 2015 19:34

WBN ~ I am sorry that you are feeling down, enjoy your posts so hope you feel better soon.
Finley, I vote the same as everyone else!! Stay, please!
George and everyone, so we'll done to you all!!
Well. My Day 35 is almost over and today was such an easy day for me, went to the beach, took doggies and not a thought of drinking, had a great time. Wish every day was that easy. Even went into a shop after beach where I used to often buy a bottle or two secretly, collected my £25 Lotto winnings instead from there. \:)/
Will save it for a treat and it won't be the liquid kind!

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