Regrouping

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chriscole
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Re: Regrouping

Post by chriscole »

thanks for the congrats.nice to see new and old peeps here.
rehab cant come quick enough, im also being sick quite often now, probably gastritis. i did think it was ketoacidosis but the gp doesnt. anyway, should clear up when im abstinent.
is there a thread on here for people who have done rehab?
ill have a look
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Mark.
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Re: Regrouping

Post by Mark. »

chriscole wrote:
02 Oct 2019 12:33
is there a thread on here for people who have done rehab?
Welcome back from me too, Drew - it's great to see you and I'm really glad you're getting rehab ;)?

As for relevant threads, I don't know what form yours will take, but you might find this one useful:

MissCheese's Detox Diary

Miss Cheese hasn't been around here for a long while, but you might remember her? She was a great member and I always appreciated reading her diary.

And this one contains more general advice:

Practical Advice About Detox and Getting Sober

These might not be quite what you're looking for, sorry, but they were all I could think of for now. Someone else might remember other relevant threads.

Another idea might be to ask on General Support & Chat if any other members have gone through rehab.

Great to see you again, and very best wishes with the rehab ;)? <:)>
Mark
"There is no 'us' and 'them'; it's an illusion. We are all human beings, and we all have a responsibilty to support one another." Roger Waters

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chriscole
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Re: Regrouping

Post by chriscole »

thanks buddy ;)?
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Mark.
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Re: Regrouping

Post by Mark. »

No worries - I hope you find something that's useful ;)?
"There is no 'us' and 'them'; it's an illusion. We are all human beings, and we all have a responsibilty to support one another." Roger Waters

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Trojan
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Re: Regrouping

Post by Trojan »

Drew, a google search for "rehab what to expect" or "uk rehab what to expect" throws up a good bit of information.

Possibly best not to search too much though — try to keep an open mind, and engage with it spontaneously when the time comes.

If it's publicly funded, then it's more likely to focus on evidence-based therapy, rather than being 12-step based. Afterwards — depending on where you are — 12-step (AA) meetings may be the most readily accessible form of aftercare. Again I'd suggest keeping an open mind, and take support wherever you find it.

Look after yourself in the meantime ;)?
Au milieu de l'hiver, j'apprenais enfin qu'il y avait en moi un été invincible.
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Tadpole
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Re: Regrouping

Post by Tadpole »

The apprentice is also my absolutely favourite programme!!!! Scoffing my dinner down after the gym so I can watch it!

T xx

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Re: Regrouping

Post by Sleepyb »

Mr T actually can’t stand it tad 😂 no taste that one!

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Re: Regrouping

Post by Sleepyb »

Mr T actually can’t stand it tad 😂 no taste that one!

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Re: Regrouping

Post by Tadpole »

Did you watch it sleepy? That hour flew past. My husband used to hate it but he also enjoys it now.

Off to bed soon.

T xx

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Re: Regrouping

Post by Cowboy »

We have a whole section of BE dedicated to relapsing yet I feel compelled to post here - go figure.

I don't look at things so scientifically. I don't look at picking up again as "relapsing". I'm just here to lick my wounds for a bit. You see I managed 1 year of complete sobriety. Did all the challenges and made it to one year - yesiree. I can crow about my other abstinence challenges - and victories - but why bother. I'm here and regrouping.

Where do I go from here? Well back to sobriety of course. Now to find my way back.

Not gonna rationalize and say I'm not drinking as much as before. I'm not but I will.

Not gonna rationalize and say I do better in social gatherings. I do but not for long.

Not gonna rationalize and say my family and close friends are impressed with my one year of sobriety. They were.

Now it's just about getting back in the saddle. I don't even like the flucking stuff. Hurts my stomach. Hurts my brain. Hurts my relationships. Just hurts - is all. Damage all the way.

Why do I do it? Am I just stupid or is there some validity in the disease theory?

By coincidence I have been reunited with a long lost cousin. She is 2 years sober but still fancies what drink has to offer. We both battle these alcohol demons on a daily basis and am I ever sick of it. Sick to death actually.

My cousin and I are related because of our mothers - sisters. Both full blown alcoholics (yes I used that label again) who are over 80 and no longer drink. You know why? They can't. It will kill them within days maybe hours. They are both on dialysis.

Siblings? My cousin has two that are full blown alcoholics (there I go again) Me? Brother drinks like a fish. Sister smokes pot to oblivion.

I have been fighting this flucking punish yourself for no reason war for over 10 years and I've won more than my share of battles. I'm just here regrouping for a spell before enter I go back to war. Hopefully for the last time.

Very disappointed in myself. Cowboy.
The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why. Mark Twain.

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martha
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Re: Regrouping

Post by martha »

Cowboy wrote:
02 Oct 2019 22:53
Very disappointed in myself. Cowboy.
Well, I'm not disappointed in you, Cowboy. And nobody who knows you would/should be. You've been totally honest all throughout your journey and you're being honest right now. You'll have helped many people, and lots you won't ever know about. Don't under-estimate your achievements.
I hope the communication with your cousin has been/will be helpful. Sounds interesting!
Take care <:)>
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Re: Regrouping

Post by Topcat »

martha wrote:
03 Oct 2019 00:05
Well, I'm not disappointed in you, Cowboy. And nobody who knows you would/should be.
Ditto CB <:)>

Relapsing brings out the worst in us. All our insecurities and self loathing come to the fore ('see I told you you were useless didn't I - might as well pour another drink, you know you want one').
Cowboy wrote:
02 Oct 2019 22:53
Where do I go from here? Well back to sobriety of course. Now to find my way back.
That's the spirit. Try not to dwell on the lapse. Put it down to experience and get back in the saddle. Use the positives that got you through the sober year and discard the negatives of the lapse. You're stronger now than you've ever been and you can beat this ;)? <:)>
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Re: Regrouping

Post by Sleepyb »

Morning all. Cowboy, don’t think we’ve really ‘spoken’ as such but I’ve followed your story and you’ve been so insightful and interesting. I’m sure you know but you can’t write off all that AF time. Just have to get straight back on it.
I think (hope) I speak for the other groupies when I say this thread does suit me best as although I haven’t tracked up even a third of what you have, I do want to acknowledge the significantly more number of AF days I have managed since joining BE. And I still live in hope sooner or later it’ll just click and my being AF will just go on and on. But until that does happen I have still made far more progress in my mission to be abstinent than I did before joining this forum xxx

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Re: Regrouping

Post by Sleepyb »

Tadpole wrote:
02 Oct 2019 22:05
Did you watch it sleepy? That hour flew past. My husband used to hate it but he also enjoys it now.

Off to bed soon.

T xx
Tad I did watch it, already so many cringe moments 😂😂

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Mark.
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Re: Regrouping

Post by Mark. »

Ditto to Martha and TC from me too, Cowboy <:)> <:)>

Getting back on the wagon asap is wise, but beating yourself up may not help. As you said, you've already won many battles. You'll win many more. The guy who wins the most battles, wins the war ;)?

Slipping after a major milestone seems a fairly common occurrence. It always worries me that folk treat it like snakes and ladders and think, "Aww, shit - it'll take me another year to get back to where I was."

If you can stop again now, you'll have lost very little time. This time next year you could be two years sober (minus a very brief dip.in the middle).

Wishing you a good day, friend ;)?

Crossing with Sleepy \:)/
"There is no 'us' and 'them'; it's an illusion. We are all human beings, and we all have a responsibilty to support one another." Roger Waters

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Tarzan
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Re: Regrouping

Post by Tarzan »

I have two very insightful comments to make:

Cowboy - I too have read many of your thoughtful and inspiring posts on the other threads and thank you for them - this community is better for having you here, all strength to you

Sleepy/Tad - you're better than that - stop watching it

Love to all

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Mark.
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Re: Regrouping

Post by Mark. »

Tarzan wrote:
03 Oct 2019 08:31
Sleepy/Tad - you're better than that - stop watching it
Nooo! Sorry, Tarzan - I'm a fan too! ;)? :lol:
"There is no 'us' and 'them'; it's an illusion. We are all human beings, and we all have a responsibilty to support one another." Roger Waters

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Tai
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Re: Regrouping

Post by Tai »

You’re in good company here Cowboy <:)> this is exactly the thread that I came to in order to regroup. And it helped me more than I can ever put into words. If I started counting the number of problem drinkers / alcoholics in my family I’d be here til Sunday. And I don’t know if it’s a disease ... all I know is how ill I felt ... in my body, and in my mind.

Getting and staying sober is no universal panacea in that it doesn’t solve all our problems in life. It can feel very unfair ... the fact that some aspects of ours lives remain stubbornly immune to the transformation we hoped for when we stopped drinking.

When we focus on what remains unchanged maybe we stop seeing what has changed though. I know I need to be reminded sometimes just what my drinking history was like. For every “good time” there were countless embarrassing/ damaging / hurtful episodes but my memory is able to zero in only those bright shiny times ... pretty typical eh? That’s why I need to remind myself and it’s not about feeling bad, it’s about staying on track.

Addiction doesn’t go away when we stop drinking. It’s probably the most difficult thing to deal with in all this. It’s the reason why we continue to think drinking will turn out all right despite all of our personal experience / evidence to the contrary. It’s the reason why I’ve had to and continue to have to work on myself. And this thread is where that work started.

Chin up Cowboy, you can definitely do this <:)>
A little knowledge that acts is worth infinitely more than much knowledge that is idle.
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Mark.
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Re: Regrouping

Post by Mark. »

Tai wrote:
03 Oct 2019 08:41
Addiction doesn’t go away when we stop drinking.
I absolutely LOVE that, Jos (::) ;)? Mind if I use it for my signature? <:)>
"There is no 'us' and 'them'; it's an illusion. We are all human beings, and we all have a responsibilty to support one another." Roger Waters

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Tai
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Re: Regrouping

Post by Tai »

Hiya J4 <:)> don’t mind in the least. Hard lesson that one.
A little knowledge that acts is worth infinitely more than much knowledge that is idle.
Khalil Gibran

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