KEEPING IN TOUCH ON THE FORUM

[Tessa]

Hi everyone
I wanted to start this thread because i am starting to worry about members that were regularly posting, and also those that posted only a few times, and havent been here for a while. MDS1 hasnt been online for weeks now, and he was here since day one. Most of us know he was connecting thru the hotel next door and that might now not be possible, but still, i have sent emails and no response. I just want to know he is ok. Ski Bunny the same, and many others. Please guys, if ever you cant get on the internet for whatever reason, if you can, go to an internet cafe and let us know you are ok and its a technical reason.
We worry if you dont post, and if its because you have found a path thats suits you better or dont need to post here anymore, not sure i am saying that right but you all know what i mean, then please just do a quick post to say that, so we wont worry.
Thanks everyone, no matter what has happened in the past and the hick ups we have had, we all care about everyone.
Tessa xx

[farrel]

HI Tessa
good to see you I dont know how long you have been on today I,ve been really busy back at work , I too was worried about people or more descriptive vey good freinds offering tremendous support suddenly going off line , I was welcomed by Duanne and he does mean something very special with this site and when i found it also star , who was going through such a hard time but also before that hopeless aka rosy who i was once in touch with, I wonder about them all but cannot think of ways to open communication channels for them to stay in touch with some of us , perhaos until they are ready , but I do not have any idea what to do about this . Glad to hear from you though.

[farrel]

Tessa
I see we have James back safe and well . good for you thinking of this thread , we really dont have any control or influence over people who have been inspirational for us as a forum but it would be lovely to hear how people are, mabee your thread will do the trick

[sue]

Agree Tessa, I've often wondered what's happened to the guys who were on at the start. And thought like you it could be a technical problem, in which case, feel sorry that they're not getting the support they deserve or maybe they've decided that at the present time BE is not for them and have bowed out. Whatever, still think of them and hope alls well cos we certainly need the support of something and BE is just so amazing. Still feel grateful that these guys have started it. Ta lots xxxxx

[Tessa]

Thanks farrel
i just really want this to be a thread where people can post that they are now moving on and for want of a better word/phrase, dont need BE anymore, or if they have probs with internet they can post and say they are ok and its just a technical thing.
My God Farrel you remember Rosy, shite, she hasnt ever posted here, she was posting on the BE site when it all started with the Kudzu thing. I often think about her and wish she would get online. I am hoping she has sorted things out and is onto a better life, and thats the reason she didnt get on the forum. God knows, its all a bit worrying though.
I wrote a PM to bub1976 because of a post of hers that i was moving to a more appropriate place, and i was asking how she was doing, and boom she is here in full swing and doing great. I hope it was my pm that tempted her to come back, as we do all care about people here, so its nice if they get a pm or a nudge in case they are feeling down.
ahhh what a night, Jans post really made me sad, its such a horrible thing to have to deal with and really makes us all think. Hence this thread....
Farrel did you read my post on jasmine oil? I know you are into those things as i am, so thought i would post that for you.

Ooops just sent this and realised Sue posted. Sue do you remember Rosy..i think you were around then, at the very beginning when there was no forum? i really worry about her as well, just want to know she is ok and the others too. oh gawd worrying night on my side. Glad to hear from you guys though, its nice to know we are safe and have a place to go to when we feel down.
Tessa xx

[ski bunny]

Hi Tessa and everyone else,

I am here and doing ok. things have been a bit crazy in Ski bunny world the past few weeks, what with a death of a friend and major hassle with the bf so I am just trying to cope and can't offer anything here at the moment. I don't really have much to say and can't face talking to anyone right now. I know it's probably not the best solution but please know I am still reading the posts on the forum and will be around again.

Please do not worry about me and a big well done to everyone who is doing such a grand job of keeping the EAF at bay

Lots of love Ski XXX

[Jan]

Hey Ski Bunny - about bloomin time! We've missed you you know....

Come back. You don't have to contribute anything. You don't need to give others support if you don't feel like it. You don't need to have light hearted banter in the coffee shop - just come back and let us support you for a while. Go on - you know you want to!

[sue]

Hi Ski, good to hear from you. Tessa, I remember Rosy, she was quite "chatty" then, wonder why she didn't come on to this forum. Whatever happened to MDS1 too? Miss his posts, hope he's OK as well.

[Tessa]

Hi Sue
I had a look on the old forum we used to use and she still posts there so at least i know she is ok. She has mentioned on there that she will try out the new forum so i hope she does. She got a new job by the way which is good news. MDS1 hasnt been around for a while and I have sent him an email...but havent had a reply.
Tessa xx

[loublou]

Hi Tessa,
I havent posted for a while but doing ok, i think. Do not know some of the people you mention, but sincerely hope they are all ok.

[Tessa]

Hi Loublou
Glad you are ok and posted to let us know Keep in touch....
Tessa xx

[Cheryl]

Hi LOUBLOU,
nice to see your here,glad you are ok....

[Nikki182]

Haven't been around for a while either... Doing ok though! Will really try to catch up with everyone at some point, have been rather busy lately

[Tessa]

Hi Nikki
glad you are ok, and keeping busy, hope its good busy stuff not boring busy stuff! Am glad i started this thread Even if people can only post a short one liner once in a while, thats absolutely fine.
Tessa xx

[byron]

Hi Nikki, Loublou,
Ski Bunny.

So good to see you post. Hope you are doing ok. Been thinking of all. Any one seen Marshmaiden?

Tessa this thread is lovely

Julie
x

[Tessa]

Hi Marshy
You dont ever have to think you cant post because of feeling ashamed, so please keep posting whenever you want and with whatever you want. Your post is pure honesty, and letting things out can help. You reminded me of myself actually, in one of your sentences. The bit about finding out your dad had gone. I too had a similar experience. I was 2 at the time, and am still amazed i remember it, but one night i woke up and felt something was missing. My mum had left and so began the story of my life. I think this might be the same for you. I get angry at times, because werent they supposed to be protecting me from such awful things, and i am not saying people "shouldnt" divorce or separate, but that they take into consideration the effect it has on their children. Because its not fair to make kids suffer at any age, and i can guarantee that it lasts a lifetime....hence why i am here in this situation today, and Marshy as well.

I wish i could give a "real" hug to HH, Byron, Jan, Ika and everyone else that is making this change because of them AND for their kids....you guys rock big time and are wonderful people, i cant say that about my mother, and probably never will. Jan, i know, we have spoken about this, but what i mean is that you guys are actively seeing what you have done to your kids, and my mum never did that, and you all have, thats my point. You are all changing the entire way your kids will go about life, they WONT be like me and resent their parents, because you decided that they are too important. My mother left when i was 2 years old, then came the visiting scenario, weekends with Dad, weekdays with mum. She left us with a sadomasachist, cant spell, thank god! A man that drank, and made her life a misery, THATS what she left us with. And so....he made our lives a misery as well. But I admire him more for taking on what he did. He had problems, as all of us here do, but he didnt walk away from them and my mother did. She went off to another country knowing we were not in good hands.

I thank god every day for giving me the strength to deal with this, but am also sad that its taken over my life, and i missed out on the real life in the meantime. Perhaps this is the reason for my drinking in the past, and occassionally now. To drown the truth, and not face it. My other sisters dealt with it in their own way too, but for me its been my own way and a bit different. I am not married....yet, but they are and have kids, and i know this has made a difference for them as they have told me this. They still deal with it every day as its not something that will disappear....ever. Jan, you once told me that its no easy thing being a parent, and they make mistakes, i so appreciate this, and know you are right. But perhaps i have shed some light on just how awful my childhood was and how it affects my every day life. Its not about the mistakes or bumps on the road they faced, but how they handled them. When your own mother calls you up and leaves a message saying she is sorry she forgot your birthday, it hurts, especially because you know you are the black sheep of the family, and she has never really accepted you. There ARE some people that cant feel the love that you all do towards their children, its just the way life goes, and it wont help if anyone says, oh come on she loves you...She doesnt, and thats that. I cant blame her for that, but i do blame her for making the decisions she made when i was 2, and leaving us with a man that had made her life a misery.

I really loved my father, i knew he had problems, and he denied them, but still. And now this is my life: i have no contact with him, i have none with my mother either since 2 years as that was making things worse, and i have no contact with 2 of my three sisters......i realise this might make you all think i am a looser and have brought this on myself, but its not the case, this is only a tenth of the story. Its not about blame, but circumstance.

sorry, had to get it off my chest and also wanted to show Marshy that i can relate to her life, life is hard sometimes, and the things that are thrown at us. But Marshy, being honest and just letting it out really does help, you helped me so that i could let out my story, and although at times it seems like there is no hope, well there is. I too have a lovely bf, but because of my past, it makes things a little different. Its all about accepting that they DO understand and most of all they accept us for who we are, i know, its not so easy to accept as we have had a lifetime of not being accepted.
Hugs to you Marshy...
Tessa xx

[Jan]

Annakins? Ou est tu?

[Anna]

Hello Tessa, Hello everyone....(Its Easter and snowy and lovely)
Thanks so much to everyone who PM'd me, It really means such a lot/everthing when in the wilderness slightly.
I did start to try and post on the forum but couldn't quite find where to begin.
I still can't quite find my way back but I am thinking of you all,
Lots of love,
Anna.x

[Anna]

Salut mon pot de pot,
Moi je suis sur L'ordinateur apres avoir fait le repas pour ma belle Mere, qui a , moi je crois, un peut peur de moi ettonnamte n'est pas..je suis le lapin de toute douceur!
You ok old pot de mon coeur?

[Anna]

Je crois que tu as buggered off?!!