Please post here if you are planning to drink.

[Vicky]

I am in big trouble tonight. Been let down badly by friends. Hard day at work, kids gone to bed and I feel totally deprived that I "can't" have a drink, only I can because there is no one here to stop me. I am pacing round the kitchen thinking I csn have just one but I can't.
5 Sober days last week and now on day 3 this week. But feeling a failure because even though I havn't cracked yet I know I will. If not now then tomorrow or Friday. Fridays always do me in. I have not signed up for the counselling yet buti will because Friday is be day I will mess it up if not before. Any one have any idea what a GP would say to me these days if I went. 5 years go I was told o contact ad action but Never have . Was going to give it a go when I found this site. Had some great advice from friendly people but hanging on by my finger nails tonight. Crying at the moment. What a state to get into.

[swordgirl.]

Oh Vicky
You are doing so well! All those sober days are racking up! Can you make yourself a cup of tea or a soft drink and then distract yourself somehow? With some TV, a book or a DVD? Or keep reading round the site. You can do this, you have already proven you can. Alcohol is a horrible insidious beast, it's like a little devil on your shoulder whispering in your ear but it is wrong, you will feel hellish tomorrow if you drink. Not least because the body starts to recover the moment you stop necking the drink so the hangover could hit you hard

I really hope you can give yourself a chance and stay off it!
Good Luck!
swordgirl.xx

[Vicky]

Thank you sword girl. Your right about the little devil. I am giving up a d going to bed. Not something I csn do every time I want to drink but it will work at least tonight.

Thanks for your support. Vicky

[swordgirl.]

Well done Vicky! I love my bed, it's an absolute saviour! You will be so pleased tomorrow that you didn't drink! I will look out for you tomorrow, keep posting.xx

[Vicky]

Hi sword girl

Well I went to bed. Woke up this morning and for a split second I was expecting the usual headache , churning stomache etc etc and then nothing! I felt fine, ready to face the day without the need of creeping about for the first half hour waiting to feel better! Thanks of your support .

[Terbie2]

I almost drank last night day 14 but too went to bed and read my book and then shortly off to sleep. Will have to come to this forum next time I get that urge cuz I told my husband and he is still freaking out today even though it is a new day.

Thanks BE for saving my life,


Bobbie in Texas

[Naughty little newt]

I almost drank last night day 14 but too went to bed and read my book and then shortly off to sleep. Will have to come to this forum next time I get that urge cuz I told my husband and he is still freaking out today even though it is a new day.

Thanks BE for saving my life,


Bobbie in Texas

Bobbie, yesterday was the forth of July, I'm not surprised it crossed your mind but you didn't drink well done on that!!!! as you said today is a new day and remember what DD said "three minutes" the life expectancy of an urge, the time it takes to brush your teeth!!!!

Almost is neither here nor there my old mum would say, I'm very proud of you Bobbie

[Naughty little newt]

I bet even Obama was swinging off the chandelier last night Bobbie, it must have been tough for you love

[Scars09]

Soon as these antibiotics are finished which is Wednesday, already feel the pull to have a drink. alcohol counsellor says that is the alcohol making you plan ahead. I have to change the planning bit, so hard.

[Finley]

Hi Scars. I reckon your counsellor has got it right! I think many of us will be familiar with the planning to drink in advance thing - consciously and unconciously we give ourselves permission. Since you've already recognised the signs, do what you've suggested and put some alternative plans in place which will get you over the hurdle. Probably once you've avoided the first drink you 'could' have, it will be easier not to do it another time

[CarolP]

.

[CarolP]

too late. what's the point. no husband on kids no job haha someone would call it freedom!

[Topcat]

too late. what's the point.

There's every point Carol. I was in that same situation, but I got a life back and so can you. It is not impossible - you start by cutting out the alcohol and the rest will then follow on. I can't say you will regain what you have lost, but at least you can rebuild a decent life for yourself. Why not give it a try? Everything to gain and nothing to lose

[Naughty little newt]

I was the tender age of twenty four, divorced, wife banged up by another bloke, expected to pay for the child in the eyes of the law (DNA was star trek back then) stuck with a mortgage I couldn't pay and right at the bottom of the pit with the world looking down on me laughing. I got through it, ok I pissed two decades up the wall to forget it (the tit I am) but I made it, virtually in one piece. I would have done so much more with my life if I hadn't of been drunk, what happened to me was out of my control but I do blame myself for the drink and it has taken me shit loads of soul searching to forgive myself.

Life goes on, painful as it is but the wounds heal quicker without the drink, it's never too late Carol

[Maddie]

It's never too late Carol, but of course the time has to be right for you when you decide to stop and only you knows that and can control that. The best thing you can do it make the decision to stop and act on that decision. There's loads of people here who can be here to help you through.

[dammitnomore]

Hi Carol;

What TC says is so true, and no matter how bad it seems you always have options, the first of which is to cut out the alcohol, after that things do get clearer, you start to find out that there is more to life than booze and depression and hurt, and that you can find a way out of the darkness you find yourself in.

Give yourself a chance, you deserve it and you deserve to be cared for, first and foremost by yourself. Take time for you and what you want and need. You need some TLC and you are the best one to know exactly what kind you need. A nice bath, nice cuppa, a nice meal, maybe just a lie down with some nice thoughts, find a dream, explore it, take it for a walk, cherish it and let it take over you and offer encouragement to you to get back to you, the Carol who deserves better and will get better.

Carol, you need to take care of your body too, drink water, eat, rest, give yourself a chance to heal, to recover, to go on. You can do it, you want to , you're here, and that says a lot about your desire. Once you have yourself together, then you can start recovering your relationships with your children.

A very long time ago, I made the mistake of staying with alcohol and it cost me the love of two daughters who have never spoken to me since. This will never leave me, and I will always wonder what would have happened had I stayed in their lives even from a distance. You will always be their mother, and as long as you do your best to maintain a relationship with them, they will be there for you. And nothing and no one can ever take that away from you.

Have a couple of these , or three, and take care.

[CarolP]

Messed up really lovely girl. went out driving to kill myself. Saw the Doc to get loads of sleeping tabs to knock my self off!!! What a load of c**p. My son and daughter are worth more. Im pretty lost just now. The NHS cant really help. This is more about depression than alcohol so I guess that's something

[CarolP]

Quite tough. Its a shame, son and daughter are caught between, but I am very careful about what I tell them. I think they take his side. He just came in and was bad mouthing me - daughter kind of went quiet so he stopped

[Jaxom]

Carol Life can get really, really tough at times but it can and does change for the better. I once did the car thing but thankfully did not have the courage to follow through. Since then I have had many low points but also some great times and it those great times that make life worth living. It is hard, perhaps impossible, to see when it feels like everything has fallen apart and we get depressed but the future really is an undiscovered country and it can hold unexpected joys. Life is a journey and that means we move on. Whatever our woes are today we move on. It might take a while but we move on and eventually leave the crap bits of today behind.

Dave

[wilbers11]

Just needed some support - 21 days in and had such a horrible morning. I won't go into it too much but met a group of 'friends' and its like me and my son didn't exist. Talking over me, ignoring us - silly really but every time I meet them (haven't seen them in a while), I want to drink.

I feel so angry and hurt I don't know how to deal with these emotions. I just want to drink them away.