How to stop drinking alcohol
So you’ve come to the decision to stop drinking alcohol. Maybe you’ve tried a few times to just cut down, and drink more sensibly like others around you seem to.
But you’ve had limited success, perhaps you manage it for a week or so, then you’re drinking more again. Then the blackouts and awful hangovers start. Finally you decide its time to quit.
So how do you stop drinking? The first thing is to -
Consider your motivation for stopping
Weigh up the pros and cons of your drinking, the costs versus the benefits.
(write them down here)
- What are the good things about your drinking right now, what does it do for you? This is important to consider, because you need to find other ways to achieve this.
- Then what are the bad things about your drinking? Really dig deep with this - look at your relationships, your health, job, self-esteem, depression etc.
- Next what are the good things you expect to happen when you stop drinking, how will your life be better?
- Finally what are the negative bits about quitting? What is putting you off the idea? Again, this is important because you will have to find some way to solve these concerns.
You need to be reminding yourself about this list of your motivations every time you think about having a drink. The next stage is to find out -
Are you physically dependent on alcohol?
If you are, then you will need some sort of medical supervision to help you through the detox. You might have experienced D.T.s before (the shakes, or Delirium Tremens to be precise), but full scale alcohol withdrawal can be an unpleasant business. Hallucinations, seizures, it can even be fatal. So for the sake of safety, if you are drinking all day from the moment you wake up in order to avoid your hangovers, you should see your doctor before you plan to stop drinking alcohol. They can help you with medication, or even a short stay in hospital to get you over the first week. If the thought of that scares you to death, then you MUST try and cut down a bit before you stop completely.
So you’ve worked out why you want to stop, and if you can stop safely. Now what? You need to -
Develop a plan for how you can avoid those urges to drink.
Read our earlier article on coping with alcohol cravings first. It will give you a few techniques to help you. One thing’s for sure, will-power alone is not enough to stop you from drinking.
You need to work out what are your ‘high-risk’ situations, what are your ‘triggers’ that make you want to drink? Some of these can be avoided, so make plans as to how you can avoid them. For those that clearly can’t be avoided, you have to start thinking about how you can deal with them differently. Make your own relapse prevention strategy.
Now sit back and wait for sobriety.
Ok, so it might not be as easy as all that (of course not), you may well slip and have a drink, you might even relapse in dramatic fashion and wake up in a ditch somewhere. Don’t laugh, it might be you. You haven’t failed, you just let that old habit sneak up and catch you unawares.
This obviously isn’t going to change over night. And realistically, this is where you might need the help of a professional. You will need to replace all that drinking with other activities, which means you need to set yourself some achievable goals.
The same goes for your feelings, learning how can you cope with difficult feelings without alcohol will take some time. Alcohol has been your way of dealing with everything difficult in your life, so you are going to have to find some other ways to cope, basically.
You should regularly review what is working and what’s not, what things are still tripping you up and most importantly, what benefits you are seeing. Remind yourself of your original reasons for wanting to stop drinking alcohol. And of course, if you find that you need some help, try a counselling session.
January 1st, 2008 at 1:50 pm
I am pretty much in the same boat as everyone else. I developed a drinking problem in my early 20s and on one occassion stopped for a year and on another two years. I am 30 now and my life is a complete mess as a result of drinking. 2007 has easily been the worst year of my life. I tried to self managed my alcoholism for 3 years, never being drunk in front of work mates, not going out to bars etc. Real white knuckled behaviour. The last 18 months I have seen my life nose dive into self-destruction and the game is up in regards hiding it from other people. Everyone now knows or suspects that I am a terrible alcoholic. I make resolutions that I won’t drink, I might last a week and then bang, my insane mind tells me it will be ok and I lift that first glass. That’s me away on the merry-go-round for another week, then come the horrors, shakes, sweats etc. I empathise with anyone also going through this. I am long past the point of socially drinking. I just want to stop now, but not for a week as I usually do and then tell myself I am ok.
January 2nd, 2008 at 1:02 am
Ok so I’m 23, and have really been drinking quite heavily for the last 2 years or so…it started senior year in college where I think me and roomates combined went about 3 nights not drinking for the course of an entire school year. Now, living back at home I haven’t managed to stop drinking everyday. It really has only ruined one relationship for me, and I can function fine throughout the day. I have learned to deal with hangovers like they are nothing anymore. I now consume about 3 - 5 beers every night when i get home from school. I don’t really get bad cravings for alcohol, often times i say “I could go for a beer right now” but don’t usually act upon that until I get home. which is around 5:30-6:00. I’m in bed by 11, so I’m not getting absolutely anhiliated every night as 3 beers in 5 hours really does nothing for me. I really do it for the taste cause I love it. Then when the weekends roll around it’s a different story. Friday and Saturday i will get completely hammered probably drinking between 12-18 or until i can’t physically take it anymore and pass out. Then Sundays during football season I’ll just drink from like 1 until about 11. I’m not quite sure as to whether or not I have a problem cause it’s only rare occasions where I will drink before the evening. I can function throughout the entire day not needing a drink.
My question really is would it be safe for someone like me to abruptly stop drinking without having to worry about seizures???
I’m going to try and quit drinking during the week….the weekends though i don’t think would be nearly as fun, as i’m still young and we are just typical 23 year olds.
January 2nd, 2008 at 8:28 am
Just by reading this page, I’ve come to learn that all of you are incredibly amazing people. The really good thing is that you have taken a step to speak out, and this is probably the first step towards making constructive changes in our lives.
The fact that you’ve taken step one - is clearly evident that you’ve had a glimpse of reality, and discovered some light. Right now, it’s almost like we’ve just about had an inch of a ray of that light - and I’m sure - there’s an entire ’sun’ of natural happiness waiting for us to bask in.
I’m a very confident person with a lot of energy and I’m aware that people enjoy my company. Yet, when I drink - I become over-confident and as you know - this is certainly a very negative trait. I don’t drink all the time - but when I do - there’s no stopping until pass out. I’ve also had several attempts at calling it quits - but with no joy!
My advice to myself and others is probably to first jot down the reasons why we want to stop drinking - and I’m sure that we’re all aware of most of them by now. Secondly - write down the things that would pose as an issue in our new lifestyle - and then find possible alternatives/solutions to them. Remember that when we actually ask the question, then your mind would produce the answer.
The difference here is having the perspective. Clarify what you will do with your free time and extra money - and not forgetting your creative energy and new brain cells. Give those dormant hobbies another shot. Why not try your hand at an interest that you’ve never persued. Who knows where all this free time could lead. I say this because I’m one of those multi-talented people - and by now I know that the only difference between people who are talented and those who are not - is actually trying. Who cares if you don’t get it right - at least you tried.
Once again - from reading your notes - your intentions are pure - STOP beating yourself up - clarify your goal…and go for it. I’m sure that there is so much more to your suppressed self - waiting to be discovered. Indeed - you’ll find things to fill your time with. You’re about to embark on a refreshing journey, filled with no remorse or hangovers.
All the best..
(wish me luck as I compile my list of reasons for stopping)
Go on… you try!
January 3rd, 2008 at 12:09 am
OK, so it’s New Year. Thanks Sam for your comment above, I will certainly consider counselling.
Not had a drink now for 48 hours, after a cocaine and alcoholic binge on New Years eve. I am now suffering from insomnia, and am dreading going back to try and run a business tomorrow. I have made a resoloution to only drink Friday lunchtime until 3.00pm on a Sunday. All I can currently think about is Friday lunchtime.
I don’t know about anyone else, but I feel as though I have created a void in me, an insatiable desire for alcohol, and unless I know where the next drink is coming from I panic.
I hope we all get in shape for 2008, and can take control. I am also worried that the 20 Marlboro Lights a day are ruining my looks, which are my best asset.
Good luck everybody, and thanks for this website.
J xx
January 3rd, 2008 at 3:25 pm
Hi everybody. I’ve read a lot in this website, and later found your stories and comments. These stories made up my mind. I want to stop drinking. At age 16-17 I started to smoke and drink. My everyday dose was 20 cigarettes and 4 bottles of beer. But that was _everyday_ dose. Later I found what a good taste feels cigars and wine or spirits. So I changed to cigars and strong drinks. One year ago my daily dose was 10 to 15 cigars and a bottle of vodka. I started to feel myself bad, lazy in the mornings and sometimes I decided to stay at home instead of going to the job…
Once I decided to stop smoking. I knew I can’t quit at one time, so I changed to cigarretes again. One month I used to smoke cigarettes, everyday trying to smoke less and less. I reached 3-5 cigarettes a day. And the hardest thing to stop smoking was my collegues. If they go smoke, they invite me along. So smoking is mostly a way to make 5 min rest. I started to eat various chocolate and wheat bars everytime I go “smoking”. Later I quit smoking and did only these little rest pauses to enjoy collegues companionship. I quit smoking.
Now it is 1 year since I quit smoking, but… I still drink. That is my problem. I even started to drink in the morning, before going to work. I have a bottle in my car in store. I go mad if I know I have only a few bottles of beer left at home, so I stop at the shop. I drink a lot and started to think how can I live without being drunk? How to have fun in a party, when everybody drinks? And the main question: how to stop?
Today is the day I announce to all of you and to myself: I start quitting to drink. And I will stop during few months. How much time it will take I don’t know. But if I could quit smoking after more than 10 years, that means I have a volition inside me and I can quit drinking too!
Good luck to all of you!
January 8th, 2008 at 10:40 pm
hi i am tom, i just found this website, i am a very bad alcoholic i statred drinking very young, i have been in treatment a few times and have managed one time to stay sober about a year and a few months, i am having a very hard time my self, always feeling scared , i think i will leave a better message when i am totally sober, good luck every one
January 10th, 2008 at 9:49 pm
hello i am ken, after reading most of these messages just wanted to tell you all to stick with it drinking has amost ruined my life i am at present awaiting a court date for drink driving,didnt hurt anyone but myself thankfully as i have to drive for a living i have lost a hell of a lot just so i could “enjoy” a drink,5 weeks sober i pray i dont go back to the the way i was because i dont think there would be any coming back,good luck all of you
January 12th, 2008 at 10:38 am
Well all of the above have a theme…that alcohol doesn’t suit some people. There are certain personality types that can handle a few drinks, now and again. However, for a large percentage of the British public, many people have low self-esteem issues and depend on drink to become somone they’re not. This is exactly what they’re doing though….the high that produces unnatural personality characteristics comes with a low that does exactly the same.
My sister is 30 years old and has been an alcoholic for 15 years. I never knew how serious this was…I just thought she had some problems when we were growing up.
Its not here fault, but her personality is not compatible with drinking….however her life has been on standby for all this time and she cannot move forward. She is a bright, intelligent and attractive young woman who cannot raise above her problems.
She is now off the drink but is struggling to get any sort of life back…well, the last time she was herself was before she had the first drink, when she was 14.
Im 29 and have decided to quit drinking for 2008..my life is better without it.
The problem in this country is the pressure to go out and drink every weekend….we need to get back to a society that values the diversity of society and accepts people for who they are. We need to find other things to occupy ourselves and realise that lives can be ruined if people drink heavily and can’t recognise that they may be at risk of alcoholism if they are not cut out to be drinkers.
Love peace and empathy
GW
January 12th, 2008 at 11:10 am
I have read through all the comments, I have been in denial for years on my drinking habit. I know i must stop. I had too much wine ,yet again last night and feel dreadful again! Withgoing on this site, i know that this is my first step into stoping drinking. I have re-joined a gym only two days ago in which i have not yet gone as i have felt to crap due to the drinking. Today i am going to go for a swim, tonight i am taking my daughter to a show. This has to be the first night i dont have a drink.
January 13th, 2008 at 9:00 am
Hi everyone, well i did go to the gym, i even managed to some training as well as a swim! Took my daughter to the high school music show in manchester. When i got home, the first thing i would of normally of done is pour myself a glass of wine, then it would of been just one more, until i would of woke up where i dropped!I even managed to have a good nights sleep. I feel great, no taking painkillers and having a redbull to get me through the day. I hope this morning is many mornings to come.
January 13th, 2008 at 3:56 pm
hi guys, i dont know whats wrong with me! everytime i go out with my mates for a few drinks, i always end up drinking so much and get the worst memory blanks ever, honestly i will go out one night and the next day not remember a thing, i make such a fool of myself and my friends tell me im aggressive and do stupid things. why cant i just go out and stay tipsy? its just when i get tipsy, i keep drinking, i alwyas tell myself i wont get drunk but no matter what i always do
January 13th, 2008 at 4:49 pm
I am 30 yrs a strong drinker and in the last 15 it has owned me far to much and now after family and the few friends I have are telling me this is killing me that I am now trying.I want to know would I have better success if I were to schedule a reduction as opposed to totally trying to stop cold turkey. I have done cold turkey for a year long ago but here I was back to it after a divorce. I feel all the pain in the postings. I run my own business so I have always had liberty to change my schedule so I could recover from to much and to opt out of work to simply stay home and drink. I wish to be free of the anchor on my neck but would like to be able to enjoy the occasional drink…Is that possible?
January 14th, 2008 at 9:40 am
I am 39 and sometimes when I drink I can not stop, normally this happens at weekends.
During the week I can go without drinking at all or just have a couple off glasses of wine or a beer and stop. But at the weekend I start and keep going till I run out of booze or I fall asleep.
I do not want to stop drinking, I just want to be able to drink sensibly.
I also worry about what this is doing to Liver & Kidneys.
What makes this even harder is that wife hardly drinks at all and can not understand why I can not just stop!
January 14th, 2008 at 7:18 pm
Hi , Well im on my third night with out having wine as soon as i get in from work. I have not really felt any bad side effects of not having a drink. I have felt very tried thou and a wee bit emotional today.I would like to have a glass of wine again in the near furtrue, but i need to condition myself into knowing when ive had enough and not go over the edge. How do they do that! I will find the answer as i know i dont and cant go on like i have been for the past 3 years. Message to the guy above, My Husband enjoys a drink and can not understand why i have the need to carry on drinking when i have had far to much, but that is the problem we have, we dont, thats where maybe seeking help from a proffessional would be useful.Good luck to you all.
January 15th, 2008 at 7:16 am
To cu&me, you must stop altogether, in the long run you will find it much easier. I tried cutting down, it doesn`t work. after 18 years I`m into my 11th week alcohol free. This website really helped knowing I`m not alone.
January 17th, 2008 at 4:34 pm
Thanks Jenny and I am sure that is what is best for most of us on here but the lingering feelings of a nice social nite out with friends and a couple drinks is where I wish I could be. I will likely have to abstain all together as I simply have lost my will to say no and over do. I am so glad my girlfriend help me find this site as I am among peers with the same struggles I am having. This a great help to me know I am not alone. Best wishes to you all and I recently heard a saying that helps each day-” You can lose your life all at once or simply one day at the time.” It is our choice every day and each day is a new beginning! Best of luck to us all. Keep up the good work as we will all be so proud to be in control and not to be controled by bad choices. Best wishes to you all.
January 23rd, 2008 at 4:30 pm
I have not had a drink now for 10 days and I feel great.
As a result I am sleeping better, feel alert & positive about life and I feel good about myself.
We went to a birthday party on Saturday night and so as to avoid temptation I drove. And I had a great time, and this suprised me as I thought I had to drink to do this.
It is early days, but I intend to keep this up as I can not see any reason to start drinking again.
January 24th, 2008 at 12:15 pm
Hello everyone,
Thought I would give an update since my last posting on 31st December. At that time since drinking practically daily since my teens and now being 47 I had not had any alcohol for the prior 4 nights. A bottle of champagne was chilling in the fridge to celebrate New Years Eve, there was some sherry left from Christmas and some brandy. Well I opened the champagne and my wife enjoyed it. I had apple and mango J2O.
Last night 23rd January was my 28th night without alcohol. I feel better for not drinking but it has not been easy. There have been a few times when I thought it would just be easier to manage the stress/relax/sleep if I just had a drink and I have had to tell the little voice in my head that I am a happier person without alcohol in my life. On Monday 21st here there was a lot of rain and it was coming over the guttering at one section and wetting the wall. On Tuesday I checked it out and the drain into which the downpipe was carrying the water was blocked. I cleared the drain Yeuch. I then decided to clear the bungalow guttering to help prevent the drain blocking again. Anyway got so far then I slipped. Without going into too much detail I hit my back in two places and scraped left ankle and right finger tips. I was and still am in some pain. I winded myself and felt dizzy but just to let you know my first thought when my head cleared was I will never get to sleep tonight with this pain. I need a drink because I am in pain therefore I can have a drink Shortly afterwards I realised from the information I had gained from this website that I was talking myself into giving myself permission to drink. It was the closest I have come to having a drink yet but thanks to this website I did not.
I feel for everyone who is reaching out. As individuals we have each trodden our own singular path that has led us to this shared problem. The means of resolving the issues that have brought us here and how we proceed in the future will be just as individual as we are. I have not travelled as far as I would wish in my journey to good health but so far I have found the following helpful :-
1) Admitting I have a problem. No really admitting I have a problem. First I admitted I had a problem then decided I could function in most areas so I didn’t have a problem. I reflected back and accepted I had a problem.
2) This website. I have read every page and the links several times and have an understanding of the psychology behind my drinking. I needed to read everything a few times.
3) I have bought Paul McKenna’s book Instant Confidence. Now when my little voice tells me that I need a drink or that I am not good enough or tries to put me down I don’t just listen to it and accept what it says. I tell it I do not need to drink and challenge the negative perceptions.
I know that there will be people who say that he has only abstained for 28 days and knows nothing yet but if one thing I mention helps one person a little then it will have been worth it.
All the best.
January 25th, 2008 at 1:29 am
hi every one , well i tryed the kudzu root it helps me with hang overs but not sure about everything else, i know its a mind over addiction thing i am very addicted to booze, and well if your reading this webpage you know the rest, i cant stop drinking, am i a pussy or a man, a little bottle controls my life every day , a little fluid called booze man its strong stuff , i think AA is the best answer????
January 28th, 2008 at 10:05 pm
I used to drink at least a bottle of wine every single night for five years but within the last six months I’ve managed to whittle that down to five nights a week. I know it doesn’t sound much but it’s a huge improvement for me to have two drink free nights a week.
These are some of the routines that help me have a drink free night.
- I make sure I have my evening meal at a different time than usual, usually 2 or 3 hours later than normal. That way it breaks up the evening and so I’m eating when I’m normally drinking, also it makes the night shorter. I’ll turn around and it’ll be 11 p.m and the Dangerous Time will be gone, also I’ll feel full and satisfied later on when I would usually start to drink and it eases the need for a drink.
- I watch movies. I don’t associate drink with movies or watching T.V so that’s my Safe Zone.
- I make sure I have little treats/snacks that I can eat during the movies.
- I turn the clock to the wall if I decide to read or play a computer game. Clocks can be the enemy during some activities. If I don’t know what time it is when I’m on the computer, it just helps somehow.
- I gather a selection of non alcoholic drinks and plan to drink them regulary throughout the evening. I find hot chocolate and herbals work well. I try to keep off the caffeine and keep drinks varied throughout the evening.
-The thing that can work for me is to have an schedule where (non alcoholic) drinks, snacks/food and activities are planned to the hour. This is when I actively use the clock to my advantage and it becomes a friend rather than an enemy. I plan what I’m going to do every hour until I go to bed.
-I have camomile tea right before bed to help me sleep.
-If you really have to drink tonight, clip your drink intake by just one glass. I’ve tried this and it worked. I used to drink more than I do now. Also I’ve weaned down my alcohol volume by choosing 11% wines instead of 13%. I did this gradually.
I associate music with drink so on a drink free night I take away my associations to drink. So it’s a no music night. The disassociation process really helps. It’s one of the key things that stops me reaching for that bottle.
I know this sounds quite sad and tragic really, such a lot of effort to try to stop drinking. I have found some comfort from these posts and I’ve cried for some of them and I really wish I could help us all beat this thing. Find your own way. There will be a way and I really hope you find it. God Bless You.
P.S As Steve says a couple of posts above, admitting that you have a problem really helps. I only admitted it two days ago and I’ve been able to cry for the first time in a long time. It feels good.
As Tom2 says, directly above, very poignantly, and I quote, ‘a little bottle controls my life every day, a little fluid called booze, man it’s strong stuff.’
He just about summed it up !
January 29th, 2008 at 11:56 pm
thanks sue, im having one hard time i tell my self to stop but on my way home where do i go the store and what do i buy, well of course my cruch, the little bottle, are we not ready to stop have we not hit our rock bottom? i have hit it a few times and ill tell u its not a pretty site , but why do we or i should say i keep drinking, if i stick my hand in a fire i say ouch dam that was stupid i wont do that again , but if i get drunk fall down my stairs knock out my front teeth stiches in my head, well shoot im back at it agian 5 days later, like i said man its strong stuff, have a good night every one , im trying to stay happy and producitve tonight
January 30th, 2008 at 2:57 pm
Hi! I was here on Nov 16th 2007 - more than 2 months ago. It was the day I promiced myself to stop drinking. I want to testify that I havent, even one drop since than on… and without KUDZU (although I bought it
I am not strong. This is not that I want to say I am proud of myself. NO. I just have found how good life can be without drinking! I could not imagine a one moment good without it before. I cannot imagine a one good with it now. Everything is better - even my feelings, those deep inside, which seemd to be active with alcohol only. Alcohol is a biggest lier in the whole world. Gives us states, feelings, thoughts we think are true… But they are not…
Will live my next testimony in 2 months.
And this page helped me very much.
Tanks to U all!
Try to live without it! - U CAN do it! I know we all CAN do it
February 2nd, 2008 at 3:03 pm
Just to let you all know -
We’ve just opened a free forum for anyone with alcohol problems. Hopefully it can be a useful resource for giving and receiving support.
February 2nd, 2008 at 3:56 pm
Hi all, I have just signed up for councelling here and been working my way through all the valuable help on the site. At the moment I am using my daughter’s lap top from a hospital bed. I am nearly 40 and have been drinking since I was a teenager, too much when I was 20, as in almost daily and daily since I was about 25. The last 6 years have watched me glug down, up to 3 liters of wine a day (there was a time when it was more). I now live in austria and the only name I have for myself can be translated into what they call here, ‘a mirror drinker’; I don’t particularly get drunk, I don’t binge, I don’t go out, I have never done anything embarrasing, I just drip feed……. which means my body goes into shock within a few hours of not giving it it’s little, regular hit. I have one of those typical case histories of childhood abuse to abusive marriages, abusive situations, depression, the suicide dances and the last few years a few life threatening events that have left me with Post traumatic stress, ra d ra.
By the way, I hope my story helps some other people to feel less alone and thankyou also to all who have posted here, you are all keeping me sane 
Blessings
I have with medical help stopped a few times, once three months in a clinic;I’ve joined groups, done programes, been in therapy, you name it, nothing has worked so far, each time I have relapsed I have used it as an excuse to just leap straight back into my old familiar shoes.
However, this last year has seen a turn for the worst in that I have felt so ill all the time, my Liver is very fatty, I started to forget everything and I virtually rendered myself house bound. It is insane as I am an exceedingly holistic person, including having qualified in Reiki years ago.
On thursday, I felt so ill in the morning because I had slept for a few hours and desperately needed some alcohol and so ran to get some wine, the problem was I felt sick as I was tying to get enough in…… sweating, shaking, chest restricted, wanting to vomit…….. all lovely stuff…….. in the end I just lay my upper body on the kitchen table and gave up and asked my daughter and her boyfriend to bring me into the hospital and with the help of wonderful medication (which I have had before) I am resting and sleeping and eating regularly and have signed up for counceling sessions here. For me this time must be the last, I feel as though if I do not work it out, I might as well go somewhere nice and drink to my devil’s delight, face the slow death and be done with it once and for all.
however, I refuse
My thoughts now are:
Sometimes stopping is not enough, sometimes changing your life is not enough……….. sometimes, finding out who you are and what your life is first is what you need so that you can know who’s life it is you are trying to change in the first place
Bar
February 3rd, 2008 at 1:01 pm
After reading all of your stories i realise I AM DEFFINATELY NOT ALONE. My parents we reasonable drinkers, allowed a little treat a christmast as we became teenagers and then you got in to the going out on a weekend (I always looked older than i was so i used to get served in bars/clubs at 15.
I met my now ex husband at 19 and regreted not doing more with my life (going round the world, working abroard etc etc). I found out 5 days after my youngests 2nd birthday that he had been having an affair with someone he worked with for (as he says the past 6 months). He wouldn’t tell me who she was till she had told her parents (she is 14 years younger than him).
Since then i have lost 3 jobs through drinking and smelling of wine i can get through a box a day (4 litres) i had to sell the family home as my ex got a court order to remove the children from my care and i am only allowed to see the on supervised access while my parents are present.
They are both retired and my dad has had a stroke with all the stress, my mums hair is failling out in handfulls because of me but i want to stop so much. I have tried councilling, the doctors, been given the hard word, been helped financially and i still go back to the old friend that makes you forget your worries.
I hope other’s will see light into this and try to get help before its too late. I know my ex will never let me have my girls back.
I never wanted this to happen but it has as now after 4 years i need to move on i may have a fell ‘downfalls’ on the way but i wish you all the very best of luck in getting over this
Helen
February 7th, 2008 at 3:23 pm
This is good to know that I am not alone. It makes me feel better that other people have problems too. ( misery love company). It’s 9:15 am and I got a drink. But I will go work out this afternoon,cook dinner and try to focus and function later. I like the late night ( dark and cold everyones asleep) and I can drink all I want without hiding. But I know that the hiding is not working. My oldest knows and that bugs me. maybe that is why I do it in the morning and late at night. I want to stop, but I need my happy place and the is booze on every wall.
February 7th, 2008 at 5:27 pm
I gave up alcohol 6 weeks ago….I just stopped… but i’ve had bad side affects such as the shakes, sweatin like a river …so i decided to do it gradually…is this wise ,its helping me coz i didn’t drink shorts i was on the beers but i bought a bottle of vodka ,an although it tastes revolting i put it in my coffee…A friend of mine who gave up drink said i should do it gradually…plz advise …
February 8th, 2008 at 10:58 am
Hello
I have made a decision to stop drinking as it is affecting my relationship and health. The other issue i have is that drinking occaisonally leads me to cocaine which I have managed to curb from a very bad habit to very infrequent use. Drinking, which is nearly a daily occurence for me, sometimes triggers the desire for cocaine and I find myself back on that downward spiral. I think I have the strength to overcome this, but as with many people commenting on this site, my social circles most often revolve around drinking. I enjoy sports, but often have a drink before participating as even this activity involves alcohol.
Can anyone give me some sound advice on how to change?
February 14th, 2008 at 12:21 am
sue, the vodka will take time to damage ur insides - i tryed it, and at first all was good, then the next thing i new, dam i was all messed up and acting very crazy, its the booze. be very careful looking for quick fixes
February 21st, 2008 at 4:36 pm
Hello everyone, I could not find the words to express my joy at finding this sight, such honesty from everyone! I am much older then most of the posts I see here as I am a 62 year old Canadian living on the east coast. My love of the demon alcohol started at an early age and for many years I would consider myself a functional alcoholic as I could hold down a job and tried to live my live with some degree of dignity. As the years progressed I found that I was binge drinking more often and it was taking its toll on my health, my marriage and my social life until 1993 when my wife and I called it quits and thats when things really got bad.
They say there is nothing like a good women to keep a man on the straight and narrow, for me that was so true! The first thing I did after our separation was to fulfil my life long dream of a trip to Australia of which I remember very little, talk about black outs! My life in the past 15 years has been a series of hitch hiking across the continent numerous times to start life anew in each new city until I was about to be found out for what I really was, then I would run away again. I have always considered my self a quite honest man but alcohol took that away from me at times and I became very good at lying. I have been in detoxes and rehabs from one end of Canada to the other and although I found the care givers kind and compassionate I did not find it helpful.
I have also tried the aa thing and I gave it an honest try but being an atheist it just does not sit well with the way I think and I am sick and tired of having people tell me what I should feel in my heart. About 6 months ago I decided to take charge of my own life, I moved back to my home province, I live in semi isolation in a cottage by the sea. Although it is winter and the sea is completely frozen I am looking froward to a beautiful summer as the beach is long and sandy. In the last 6 months I drank once and I hated all that went with it, the depression guilt and shame. I have my health back and I am hoping to enjoy my remaining years sober! Thanks for reading and I wish everyone here the best of luck!
Terry xox
February 22nd, 2008 at 8:21 pm
Hi u brave people i feel for u all. I started drinking at a very young age sherry from my mothers cupboard (she didnt have a prob) and i suppose got a taste for it but it wasnt a prob until she died i was only 28 just married and expecting my first child. It crushed me her death but stayed sane and sober for the babys sake! Lovely baby son was born and life went on still happily married curbed my drinking and soon later was expecting my second child. Life was great but still the closeness of my mother and family was lost. My husband and i started drinking red wine and it did become a habit. Rows, violence followed. We kept things together only just, hangovers, bad breaths, mints, swollen faces & eyes, broken veins and just clinging on there. Boxes of wine were gone in no time! How do you get to that state? Anyway we are still tringling on as such but i still want to stop!! I feel tired all the time and snappy with my 2 kids that have seen too much to young! I feel like crying i’ve had 3 glasses of the dreaded red 2nite and there’s more out there waiting , waiting like death on your door! I am going to stop this monday, i do for several days sometimes, but i just get back to the rut again. Someone please tell me if this herbal stuff kudzu works? I take milk thistle in hope! Why do we do this to ourselves. My husband is just as addicted as me but copes better! X luv u all h
February 24th, 2008 at 5:19 pm
Hi everyone
I found this site while googling “how to dry out safely” and think it is wondreful that everyone is so honest! I guess I’m one of the genetic types of alcoholic. My father died at the age I am now (55) of alcohol related causes. After the horror of what we went through with him losing jobs, no money to pay the rent, drunken driving etc. it suprises even me that I would end up drinking at all. Started in my twenties, just beer, but every night in the groovy pub we hung out at with musicians. Then hanging with an arty crowd (married a sculptor) started on the hard stuff and lots of home made wine. It seemed rather hip at the time, but my husband would get into a rage sometimes while drunk and beat me up. Once he threw my typwriter at my head and just nearly missed! I didn’t even admit to myself that this was abuse, thinking it to be the bohemian lifestyle aka Dylan Thomas or something. I was in my thirties when two trajedies struck at once, my hard drinking partner left me for a 19 year old girl (our neighbour) and my brother died in a motorcycle accident. Then I really hit the bottle. I did bottom out then (after a bit of a nervous breakdown) and at least laid off the hard stuff. I went to A.A. but every time I was at a meeting it reminded me of my father and I hated the religion bit. I am more of a buddhist and or atheist in nature. I joined an alternative group for women to stop drinking but people kept disappearing as they would hit the bottle again. Eventually I gave up and just tried to control the damage, not drinking hard liquor in public and not drinking on the days before going to work ,
Lately tho I am not happy with mself again. The problem is that my husband of five years has a strong habit of drinking bourbon and beer every night. He is kind and most of times seems fine on the booze. I drink wine but occassionally get very argumentative. Luckily he is very gentle and just goes into another room to sleep when we fight. The trouble is I cannot always abstain before working and often call in sick. I have also found myself putting a bit of his leftover bourbon in my orange juice on the weekend once in a while even though I find bourbon disusting! So you can see I am not in control. Last year I went to a group therapy session for five Tuesdays for people with abuse problems, but by the last session I was bored and went to a pub and had a beer and a burger. Pathetic isn’t it? I have also gained weight and I suspect my husband doesn’t find me that attractive anymore, although he is so sweet he would never say so.In January I didn’t have a drink for three weeks but didn’t loose weight because I ate chocolate to deal with cravings. Then something happenned to stress me at work and I started drinking wine again. about a litre a day. Like the rest of you I hate this problem. Thank you all for sharing with me. I really thought I was the only one who was such a loser at quitting. This morning my husband said he would not buy any liquor today as he was feeling unwell from the over indulgence the last few days. I will begin an abstinence program today. I truly want to get off the stuff. I feel bloated and sick ALL the time and can not get off my butt to go to the gym or finish the short story I am working on. I am worried about withdrawal though. Does anyone have tips for getting off safely and wth the least discomfort possible? Is it acceptable for instance to take anti-anxiety drugs for a couple of days? The main problem of withdrawal seems to be nausea and panic attacks. Thanks all for listening. And good luck in your struggles!
February 25th, 2008 at 3:18 am
Hey guys. I’m finally glad I’ve found somewhere to be able to get some support through all this. I can’t believe that it was so hard for me to find help around here. I’m a 23 year old from Canada, and although I’m on a British website, I’m glad too see there are lots of people trying to quit drinking too.
So what’s the deal with this Kudzu stuff? Where might I be able to find this?
February 26th, 2008 at 9:19 pm
Hey Ryan, I am also in Canada and I agree its hard to get help in Canada if you are not into the aa thing. I have lived coast to coast and it seems to be the same all over, but Ryan you have the internet! There are many sites that you can look into, Rational recovery, LifeRing and Smart Recovery are good ones as they both have online secular meetings and a chat room, lots of info there. I haven”t tried the Kudzu yet but I am going to check out a health food place and see if I can get it. Good luck to you and remember that for people like us it is the quitters who always win!
Terry
February 29th, 2008 at 1:27 am
Thanks for the support Terry. No, AA wasn’t for me. I’m a scientist, and that whole “God” thing freaks me out. (Go figure, I have a girlfreind who is a devout Irish Catholic) I guess opposites attract, eh? I think I might try the health food store tomorrow. I’ll let you know how it goes.
February 29th, 2008 at 9:25 pm
i have drunk for the last ten years over the last two years i have done it really heavilly i am on day 5 and still going strong i went through hell when i stopped but getting better never putting my body through that again i was near death
March 3rd, 2008 at 1:13 am
Hi- I am 22 years old and decided to stop drinking totally. I have been a social drinker since 14 and through college but any bad situation (fights with boyfriend, slapping him in the face, picking fights etc) have been connected to alcohol and me not being able to stop drinking once i’ve started…this only happens once every few months and i always tell myself i can limit myself to one or two, but it never works. i’ve finally realized that the only way to stop screwing up my relationship with my boyfriend of 4 years and hopefully future husband is to stop drinking completely. the only fear i have is that all social situations seem to revolve around drinking and i’m scard to death im not going to be able to do it b/c everyone wants to go to happy hour, bars etc. Does anyone have any useful tips to successfully quit drinking? i don’t drink during the week too much (maybe 1-2 per night a couple times a week), i seem to binge drink on weekends when im out with my girlfriends or boyfriend and friends. im afraid if i don’t do it i will lose this wonderful relationship. Any tips or words of encouragement would be greatly appreciated. Good luck to all–Today is day 1. Last year i quit drinking for about 3 months successfully but started again by starting to just drink beer, then an occasional mixed drink etc. Once again, I can’t do just one or two, or just beer and need to stop completely. thanks.
March 3rd, 2008 at 9:22 am
kimber just keep on saying no in your head and tell your mates and boyfriend that you have a problem and you want help to stop and think to yourself when your watching them getting hammered that you will be the one fresh in the morning ask one of your mates to stay sober with you when you go out . by the sounds of things i was the same as you im 26 but started drinking well young on parks and that on cheap cider you no how it is but soon as i was about 17 that was it out in manchester getting smashed every weekend getting into trouble and things just got worst but sorting it out now had enough of upsetting my familly remember your not a horrible person you have a problem i’ve come to terms with it drink is the route of all evil just stop it it aint worth it
March 4th, 2008 at 9:35 am
Hi everyone,
Wow just to read everyones stories i cant believe i’m not alone, i too do drink far too much and i don’t go out much now because i always make a fool of myself, i could make excuses for my drinking but as i see no-one else is and that makes me think this is more common than what i thought, i can easily drink 2 bottles of wine a night or one depending how i feel, it is taking its toll as i am always emotional with a drink sometimes thats the only way i can let my emotions out “when i’m drunk’ just dont know any other way of doing it, how sad is that, anyway i did start writing my feelings down and tying to find a pattern and i’ve discovered 2wks before my period is due or maybe one week before it is due i go crazy with pms and want wine,wine,wine, then once my cycle is over i don’t crave for it as much, so i’m trying to sort out my pms and i am also going to try Kudzu and beat these cravings,
Thank you all because now i know i’m not alone, please let me know if anyone out there drinks more with pms
March 5th, 2008 at 12:29 am
Meg- No never had the problems w/PMS before and wanting to drink but I’m sure you’re not the only one experiencing that. Thanks for the tips! I am doing well day 3 now and im OK– I don’t have cravings to drink but succumb sort of easily when everyone else is at the bar drinking etc. But thinking about not having a hangover the next morning will certainly help out. Any knowing and keeping telling myself that having only 1 probably isn’t possible, maybe for one night but not forever will help too! Weighing the pros and cons also helps. I can’t come up with one benefit drinking gives me, only cons. If that doesn’t spell it out to me I don’t know what does. I am my own worst enemy when it comes to that for sure- I know I can do it though- yay!
March 5th, 2008 at 9:52 am
Chris really glad to hear you quit the drinking, just thought i’d let you know someone is thinking about you i’m sure everyone on this page is hoping and praying for you to keep off the drink, anyway hope all is going well for you, keep up the good work….
March 5th, 2008 at 9:57 am
Hi Kimber,
When i was your age i always drank at weekends only, and now its crept up on me big style, we all know if we could turn the clock back we would, but we can’t and its here and now that you realise you have to change for you not for anyone else. Friends will come and go your health won’t ,, good luck kimber, we are all our own worst enemy when we are drinking don’t beat yourself up your only human, just hope we can encourage each other on this web page,,,,,
March 7th, 2008 at 5:48 pm
Hello hope everyone is doing well and staying off the booze, cheers for support meg how you getting on, you managed to stop.
March 10th, 2008 at 12:45 am
I have decided to quit drinkng and have setup a blog so you can keep track of my progress. Any comments and encouragement will help.
I know that the next two weeks will be easy because I’ve tried the quitting thing before.
Wish me luck.
http://roadtosoberness.blogspot.com/
March 10th, 2008 at 11:07 am
worried sick about my daughter, she has 5 kidies and she has started to drink at least 2 bottles of wine a day. the children have noticed to, should i approach her or keep my sticky beak out help me please
anne
March 10th, 2008 at 4:13 pm
Hi Chris I finally got Kudzu today i have cut down on the wine, i was out with friends at the weekend and had a few bottles of miller, that was friday night and i haven’t touched it since, but i’m finding it hard off the wine hopefully these kudzu pills work and takes my cravings away, How are you getting on Chris have you managed to keep of the booze?
March 10th, 2008 at 4:26 pm
Hi Anne,
Mother’s can get themselves all worked up when they see a child getting into a mess, She might not appreciate it coming from a family member as we tend to say the wrong things, is there anyone that you can think of like a friend of hers or someone who she might look up to, then if she confides in you, then you can be there to listen and give her advice if she asks, but only if she asks remember that one, but ye do not sit back and watch her go down the wrong path,,,,
March 11th, 2008 at 8:36 am
i am a 57 year old female and been drinking at least a six pack of beer every night for about 30 years i dont drink because of boredom or any social thing. I started drinking because i have rls and back then it wasnt heard of and aspirin didnt help me sleep so i started drinking beer which helps me sleep but now after 30 years im worried about what damage is being done to my body. i work and have never had a problem holding down a job i only drink when i get home from work and on the weekends i dont have a beer until i feel it is time to go to sleep. i guess i could go to the doctor and get the medication for rls but what side effects does that drug have…. i dont like taking medication can anyone give me some advice i would really appreciate it
March 11th, 2008 at 9:00 am
I am in the military, and in this male-heavy environment it is all too easy to succumb to cravings. For a while I could kid myself that as I was reasonably fit, I could “get away with it”, but now I’ve decided enough is enough. Whilst it’s unfair to blame others for my lack of willpower, the “let’s go for a quick one” (that turns into a quick eight) mentality is too much of a temptation for me. Some of my colleagues have expressed concern at my habits, and so I hope that when I show commitment to my sobriety, they’ll respect my decision to clean up.
If I’m to improve myself, as both a professional and as an individual, I must admit my weaknesses and work around them.
March 11th, 2008 at 1:03 pm
Hello meg, whats kudzu, i’m doing ok still not touched a drink i can sleep normally now glad about that thought i was going crazy. How you getting on.
March 12th, 2008 at 6:54 am
HI every one nice to know not alone wanting to stop drinking just become a habitt every night time to be happy and something to look forward to not had drink for 7 nights but hard to do with out surport like a little person in side saying at 5 oclock have a drink lol not easy
March 12th, 2008 at 9:40 am
Hi Chris Kudzu is a herbal remedy which i found out about on this site, I can’t believe just how much my cravings have cooled right down, I just hope i can do well at the weekend’s as this is my true downfall, i’m glad you are doing well, I hope i can just do as good, are you on any medication chris if so does it help? keep up the good work, what i like about this site is even if i do lapse and take a drink i actually feel ok about telling you guys as i know you wouldn’t judge, you keep up the good work chris hope you don’t mind me replying to you ,,,,,,,,
March 12th, 2008 at 9:43 am
Hi Steve,
Well done for keeping of the booze hope you keep it up all i can say that little person inside saying have a drink,,, well i have to say that happens to me everyday i call it the little monster and i hate it so much because sometimes i actually listen to it, but with some support maybe we can get rid of this little person/monster once and for all, good luck,,,,,,
March 13th, 2008 at 11:46 am
Hi meg no i don’t mind you replying to me, i’m not on any medication, i just got told that i need to get vitamin B complex because alcohol gets rid of it so thats all that i take. I went to the doctors and they want to do a blood test on me to see if my liver is ok, you should go they can give you stuff called Acamprosate which helps to ease the cravings, and disulfiram which makes you feel ill if you drink, so thats one way to stop you drinking ha, but i also got told that they could do you more harm than good. I find keeping busy helps me alot and going to the gym to keep fit and to build up because i lost loads of weight over the last year, just need to give up smoking now but there is no way i’m doing that just yet one thing at a time. Do you want to give up drinking alltogether.
March 15th, 2008 at 11:54 am
hi Chris,
you sound determined to stay of the booze, good for you, i would really love to stay of the booze altogether i’m loaded with the flu a the moment, so i haven’t been tempted thank god, i also go to the gym a lot and i know it can help, once i get rid of the flu i’ll be going back, keep up the good work,,,,,,,,
March 16th, 2008 at 1:26 pm
I came to say congrats to all who are making it thru the weekend free of the hammer this weekend and if you didn’t escape the urge then try,try,try again. I had a friend ask how many times was I going to quit and I told him until I get it right. There is so much on the line for me but I fall sometimes regardless but it’s not that we fall but that we get up and go forward. It has gotten better since I had an eye opening visit to the local jail a month ago(never had this pleasure before). What an eye opener to the understanding of what a charmed life I do actually have with my freedom. Seems the authorities were unhappy that I ran into a fence with my truck and couldn’t talk but half ‘english’ and half “Klingon”(from the Startrack tv show).I won’t get to the other colorful details but after one week of the ‘delicious food’ and ‘comfortable accommodations’ and pleasant staff! I had a revelation. Stop the madness. I like everyone knows what I am doing but why do we do it is a question I have asked myself always. Pro’s and con’s-write it down-I did and ‘relax’ was the only honest pro I could come up with. The con’s have it hands down but the simple exercise of writing down this list and taping it to my bath mirror reminds and motivates me everyday to keep straight. I have a counsellor by choice and he is helping to focus. I have meetings not by choice but by a judge. I love this site and all who share their struggles- it eases the isolation we/I put ourselves in when a fear overcomes us. Fear is the single most emotion I have recognized that causes me “wrong thinking”. I like many don’t care for AA as I am not powerless. The last time I had to be held down and have drink forced into me was…………never! I chose to be what many in my realm believe is a hell of a nice person, caring, giving, cheerful, and a funny guy and I am-BUT-I over indulge ALOT LOT LOT LOT. What they don’t see is the me who doesn’t stop drinking So much as I hide that ‘me’ very well(at least until the fence ran in front of me). I have bored you all to long but I want to commend you all for being HONEST WITH YOURSELVES. Everyone struggles with life. I see those who make it look easy but the single common denominator to them is I recognize they have structured it that way through their goals and determination and most of all is the restraint they quietly wield in their lives. My religion is a strength but it is I who have to use my senses to overcome. This as all skills are learned and honed with effort and time. Stay straight and don’t give up if you fall because we all do in so many ways but quit being to hard on yourself but do continue to expect success from the only one who can give it to you -YOU!
Signing off for now #918273645
March 17th, 2008 at 11:05 am
Hi all, I’m 43, been drinking since i was 16, I used to drink everyday, before last wednesday when i decided enough is enough, and stopped, got fedup of getting into fights, and getting barred from pubs. I have a reputarion as a drunk and always will have i guess, fedup of selling stuff just to buy beer/cider.
I’d find any excuse under the sun to drink, footy on tv, horse racing, thinking about my family [lost my mum/dad/sister in a short space of time]. used to drink that white cider 4 litres a day [until i got an inflamed liver] not anymore, after that i drank that cheap £1.26 a bottle cider 4 litres a day for the last 3 months. moved to this town 3 years ago, i have no friends [very clicky this small town, btw had no choice to move my house was sold up in london]
anyways it’s been 4 days since i drank, and i feel fine, infact i feel proud of myself, or is this the ‘calm before the storm’, I read above that it’s better to ween off drink, rather then cold turkey, that scared me a bit, but it also nearly gave me an excuse to buy drink!!.
I’m going to try me best, take each day as it comes, try and sort my life out, been unemployed for 10 years [wonder why!], but i have to say my flat is the cleanist it’s ever been, nomore empty cans and bottles on the floor, i just hope i havnt got that compulsive cleaning disorder now!!
all the best evryone.
March 17th, 2008 at 11:25 am
forgot to mention how i’m getting by with out alcohol, i’m used to having a big 2 litre of cider down by my side, so instead i now have 2 litre bottle of drink [water or coke etc..], and i swig that, pretend it’s cider, i have a habbit of reaching for the bottle, esp whilst smoking [which i'l been giving up next month]
also forgot to mention in my previous post, the blackouts, the vomiting, people saying hello to me, and i’ve never met them in my life!!, the guilt, the lack of self-esteem, the not washing for days.
on a positive note, i still have £32 from my giro, i got on saturday [that would have been gone now]
all the best.
March 17th, 2008 at 11:26 am
wheres the Edit button!, just want to thank the sysops/admins/counsellors of this website, nice to have somewhere to express my feelings, and to see i’m not alone, THANK-YOU.
March 17th, 2008 at 10:04 pm
Good luck Edward,,,,
Hope all goes your way and don;t listen to those wee voices in your head saying go on have a drink they don;t exist,,,
all the best,,,
March 18th, 2008 at 2:10 am
I am glad to hear your resolve Edward. I thought the first line was my biography when you said you are 43 and drank since 16 as that is me in the mirror. I was “lucky” to keep my drink under wraps while I worked but at quitting time my first stop was a store and as time pasted I got ‘LOL’ smarter and had a cooler with beer in the auto waiting. Glad to have you back living life and not simply existing or just enduring.
I am in the US but have traveled abroad a good bit so I know the world to be similar for the most part. We are all here because we wish to have something we lost along the way in life. I’m sad it took me so long to act but there still alot of life to live. Keep on track and if you stumble don’t give up. We all stumble. Like the kid learning to walk, the parent doesn’t give up on them if they don’t get it right the first time. My father quit smoking a thousand times before he finally got it right. Hold your head high and give the smalll town a reason to believe you have changed and the respect willl follow but you have to earn thier trust. I have some family and friends to make amends with so I to know how it feels to be discounted. I have to renew my vow each hour of each day and I know it will get easier with time.
As far as the withdraw symtoms go I was ok and I was a very heavy drinker 7 days a week but everyone is different so just beaware what your body says to you. I like the idea you replaced the cider with a 2 liter. The mind is a peculiar creature. If you tell it something long enough it becomes true if only in our own mind the myth exists. Thanks to all for sharing as I take strength knowing I am not the only one feeling the pain of struggle. Ciao
March 18th, 2008 at 3:37 pm
Thanks for the encouragement, still have a headach, but it’s bot as bad as it first was, first couple of days i was sweating and shaking abit. I’m also telling the few people i know, that i have stopped, and their reaction is one of “yeah ok!”, the more people say i can’t do something, just makes me more determined, like back in 1987 i stopped smoking, and didnt smoke again till 2000 [stupid me].
These are early days, and i’m sure at the moment it’s my enthusiasm that’s
making me feel ‘hey this is easy’ once that wears off, that’s when i’ll learn
how tough I am.
all the best everyone
ps there is no T in CAN
March 19th, 2008 at 3:15 pm
I just found this website after googling ‘ how to stop drinking’. I’m very impressed with everyone’s honesty and with the effort people are making and I hope everyone is having great success. I want to stop drinking too. I don’t drink much now as my tolerance has gone right down (I am 60). I have gone through stages of drinking far more than that and of making a complete ass of myself. It’s not easy to admit that; I prefer to think I was having a good time but it’s better to be honest, isn’t it? Now I only have a couple of glasses of wine a night and maybe one more if we go out for a meal but it still makes me feel not good in the morning. The difficulty is that my partner also likes to have a couple of glasses with our evening meal and it’s so hard not to join him. Lack of willpower is my problem. At the risk of boring you all, I’d like to post here every day I dont have a drink for the first week or so. I promise to keep it short.
March 19th, 2008 at 6:41 pm
More power to you Amanda. We are for you. Share the goal with your mate so there is someone to encourage you even if they aren’t abstaining-just a suggestion. Best wishes.
March 20th, 2008 at 9:38 pm
Vanny J, I know exactly how you feel you sound just like me. I’ve just discovered this site and after reading your posts i know exactly how you are feeling. I started drinking wine (nightly) after a bad break up in a relationship. That was two years ago. At first i drank two bottles every night, never ate and was constantly hung over. I’m not as bad now but i drink a bottle of red every night mostly. I found some lower alcohol wine in hope i would cut down alot and if not, at least be drinking fewer units. All it means is that i am able to drink more without feeling drunk. I dont know about you but are you noticing the effects on your skin? My cheeks seem to have permanent red blotches and i have bags under my eyes. Any help from anyone would be appreciated.
March 21st, 2008 at 5:21 pm
thanks for the best wishes, CU&ME. I have managed 2 days now and feel better already. I start to look forward to my 1st glass of wine about this time and i usually have one at about 6pm. it’s so hard not to but you have to do something else. what i’ve been doing is to have a glass of tonic instead and pretend it’s gin and tonic. i know it’s not the same but the taste of tonic is quite strong and can diplace the need for wine til the feeling stops. if i can get past about 7pm or get past dinner time it isnt as hard. i have to think of the benefits. i’ve got more energy in the mornings and can get on with my day immedialtely instead of moping about for ages doing nothing.
Good luck to all who are trying.
March 21st, 2008 at 11:40 pm
Over a week without a drink, don’t even feel like a drink. Sleeping better, eating better.
all the best.
March 22nd, 2008 at 1:02 pm
Welcome to all of us who ride the run away train. The best thing I have done since stopping is eat more fresh fruits and veggies. Gives me more energy and that makes my resolve better as I can do more and that makes me appreciate the freedom of my choice to not partake. Good luck and smile - it’s the least expensive way to look and feel better plus it makes those around you wonder what you been up too ; ) PS. I still want but that is getting easier sloooowly but having more money in my pocket is an incentive also.
March 23rd, 2008 at 2:24 am
I wanted to share that I do use xanax to help with my anxiety. I feel like I’ve replaced one drug with another but at a low dose the effects are positive without any fear of becoming dependant. I have already started to take less often and am holding well away from the drink…..YEAH. Have a good weekend.
March 23rd, 2008 at 9:59 pm
I just found this site and it is nice to see that i am not alone. I am going through day 3 right now and it’s been extremely hard. i made a decision to stop drinking on tuesday after many black outs. im tired of blackouts. i feel weak and i really want a drink. but im going to try and not have one.
March 24th, 2008 at 4:43 am
Hi
Great site & it helps ! - reading what otherrs have gone through and there is a positive to look forward to.
This is day 1 for me, 4.30am up regretting last night drinking again.For the past few years every night at home would start off cooking tea with a bottle of red wine and progress to 2 or 3, now it is like auto pilot and a deep realisation has hit me - i have got to stop.
I hate the mornings, i never have hang over just a “mickey mouse” sensation, numbness that i hate.
I have a gorgeous fiancee and 2 beautiful children - the sense of guilt is immense.
I have stopped every now and then for 1 or 2 days - then its back to normal habits.
I know i have to……….so this is day 1.
Best wishes to all
Marc
March 24th, 2008 at 2:32 pm
Welcome Marc and Crystal to the run away train crew. I have been reading the Kudzu page and comments and I can say you should check it out as it with will power sounds to have dramatic success with no side effects. I haven’t tried it but have been doing well so far but my resolve comes from other help/reasons. Not that have it down pat yet. The Kudzu sounds to lessen the effect of alcohol so you don’t have that euphoric effect and desire it less but read that page and see all the postings. Best of luck and do only your best but if you do stumble don’t beat your self to much as we have all been trying for sometime to lick the thing. This what brings us here-so kudos to you for making the decision to help yourself….. I am doing it so far with only two hiccups but the urge is always gnawing :/
March 25th, 2008 at 4:27 pm
hello meg hows it going, have you been finding it easier to say no to the drink yet ?
March 25th, 2008 at 5:28 pm
this morning I decided to quit drinking (I do most mornings, but this time I have to do it). I have been used to drinking two bottles of wine most nights for about 5 years, have tried a few times but give up because of the lack of sleep, and this is what is worrying me this time, can any give advise on how to sleep better, and indeed how long the lack of sleep lasts, that is the only thing is putting me off, and the sleep deprivation is worse than the hangovers. Also is this Kudzu as good as they say?? thanks
March 25th, 2008 at 7:20 pm
jules
I have been doing exactly the same as you for a good many years, and yes the skin and the eyes do change, thats when i started to get scared. Also my blood pressure is dangerously high , another symptom.I have been back to this site many times in the hope that it will help me to find some value in my life. Tonight i have bought no wine, who knows about tomorrow, but i really do want to live and to wake up tomorrow without the guilt and the weariness.
March 25th, 2008 at 9:45 pm
It isn’t about willpower. It’s about stripping away the illusion that alcohol is some kind of a prop or crutch; something that has real benefits. Read Allen Carr’s ‘Easy Way to Control Alcohol’ - he’s the one who wrote the revolutionary stop smoking book. If you continue to think you’re missing out on something, it’s so difficult to stop and willpower is NOT the way. This book is amazing. I never feel as if I’m missing out - I go out and socialise and live life to the full; I feel healthy and my kids aren’t growing up assuming that adults automatically drink alcohol, which I’m pleased about. Good luck - give the book a try.
March 26th, 2008 at 2:07 am
Hello. I know this forum is for people with alcohol problems, BUT I NEED HELP. I am not sure what to do as my husband is an alcoholic and although he knows it, will not do anything to stop. He tells me that he is drinking less, but I know he is not. I realized a while ago that he has been hiding bottles of wine and liquor which I have found in the strangest places in our home. I cannot help it, but confront him and it just upsets us both. He becomes angry when he drinks and says hurtful things. The next day he has forgotten what he has said and how he has acted. I have read, researched and prayed. I have spoken, kept quiet and cried. I am at a loss. Now, stupid me thought he really had started to drink less as what used to be at least 1L bottle of wine plus 4 to 8 beer PER DAY is now 6-8 beer….HOWEVER, I just discovered from our recycling bin that a water bottle was used to store wine. Upon opening up all the empty water bottles I realized from the smell that they were used to store alcohol. I can go on and on about the hiding, little lies all tied to alcohol, but it will take too much time. I am just very emotionally tired. I try to realize that he is stressed and have tried to change patterns in our lives so that he will not turn to alcohol. It is hard to come to terms with the fact that he has a problem and he attributes his likeness for alcohol on stress. However, I know that even when life is carefree he has drank too much. What can I do? I have shared this with family members and they just say he is stressed….they can not fully understand what it is like living with an alcoholic as they are not. It is easy for them to say to pray and hope….keep your mind off of it. If I told them a quarter of the things that go on when he is drunk, they would think I am exaggerating as they already think I am being a drama queen. One friend says to threaten him to get help or else while another says don’t scare him and just be there for him……PLEASE help.
March 26th, 2008 at 10:07 am
hi hopeless, why dont you record him or better still hide a video recorder and film him and show it to him the next day. I was a idiot to my girlfriend and said hurtful things to her and in the end fair play to her she said she will leave me if didn’t sort it out, so i did and were both happy now. divorce him if he doesn’t stop if he doesn’t he will never do, and you will be misserable for the rest of your life. It makes me feel sick when i think back what a horrible person i was when i was a drunk, hope things work out for you ..
March 26th, 2008 at 6:38 pm
Hi John, Thank you so much for your words. I want to try out your suggestion and will. I will not get my hopes up that it will work. It is like Jekyll and Hyde when he drinks and doesn’t drink. Can alcohol really turn someone into such a monster?
In the past (I try not to dwell on what has happened) I have written letters, emails to him voicing how I feel when he is drunk……and trying not to sound like I am picking on him. He just does not want to talk about it and ends up bringing up my faults and how I am “making” him drink. I love him and want to help, but I feel I am just losing myself in the process. I hope to be able to help him.
March 28th, 2008 at 8:00 am
I don’t see my problem in any of the comments. I’m 59 years old and female. I live alone. Alcohol is not causing any behavior problems for me. I don’t drink and drive. No one is concerned about my drinking but me. It’s not getting worse. But I do drink every evening, from 3 to 8 beers, depending on when I start. Sometimes I will start as early as 1pm if I’m home or I may not start til 10pm. I usually drink til I pass out. If I don’t drink, I don’t sleep. I’ve tried not to drink, 10 days at a time. What happens is that I sleep less than 4 hours a night and by 10 days I’m crazy exhausted. I started drinking a few years ago because I couldn’t sleep but also because I have fibromyalgia and the beer relieves the pain. I take no medication at all, even over the counter. I can’t take sleeping pills because they don’t wear off til the afternoon of the next day and I’ve tried various herbs which don’t work for me. I’ve tried exercise, etc. A day doesn’t go by without beer and I’m sick of it. Btw, I don’t get hangovers.
March 30th, 2008 at 10:57 am
Edna, wow someone like me. I drink every single night so I can go to sleep. It is not 3-8 beers but more like 20 ounces of straight vodka (which is like 20 beers). I sleep so well after I drink but if I don’t drink I don’t sleep at all. I have been doing this since I was 19, and now I am 29 going on 30. I don’t get hungover, I work and have a great job and a good family life. I don’t have any psychological, physical, or sociological impairments due to my alcohol usage. I am worried now about my liver. What if it is scarring? Based on my health it is doing it’s job, but all I hear about everyday is wooh drinking scars the liver, you will die. Is this always true?
March 30th, 2008 at 6:51 pm
Hi John, Edna-I hear you. I am 47, male, and I drink to get to sleep. My day-life is fine with little or no urge to drink, but +10 oz of rum every night is wrong. I’ll lay in bed some nights, and then finally get up and take a huge drink of rum to help me get to sleep. My beautiful wife talked to me about my regular drinking, but she doesn’t know it is this bad. She is sincerely concerned and loving. I am ashamed to say I have responded by hiding the rum in water bottles under my garage work bench. I now pay with cash to have no credit card trails. I sneak out to the garage, gulp it back, and then a squirt of toothpaste acts as a breath-freshener. Yes, we should worry about our liver, stomach lining, blood pressure, skin, etc. but of course everyone is affected differently. But of course it is killing us. I am impressed with this web page and I hope this discussion can help me help myself. Good luck to you guys too. I’ll keep reading, as I just found this web today.
March 31st, 2008 at 3:42 am
John and Edna. Although I cannot speak firsthand as I do not drink, my husband does and how drinking helps you sleep is one of the reasons he continues to drink. He has never been a great sleeper (even as a young child). Now he will manage to get some sleep after a night of drinking. He will drink anywhere from 1L wine and 4-6 beer OR 12-16 beers or more…..will function seemingly well the next day. My father and 2 brothers are physicians so I know that from them (and from medical books) that the liver will continue to be over worked from the high volume of alcohol. CIRRHOSIS of the liver (scarring) can be caused by drinking and MANY PEOPLE WITH IT HAVE NO SYMPTOMS DURING THE EARLY STAGES OF THE DISEASE. And since everyone is different, it is not always the same number of drinks one has or the same time frame one has been drinking that may lead to this disease. However, one thing is for sure…..the liver is the largest organ in the body and is SO important so take care. I have tried desperately to use health as a reason to get my husband to stop drinking, but it has not worked. Although he has (at my request) had liver function tests done in the past (he just asked our family doctor to request such a test on his blood work request) and all is ok, it certainly does not mean that his liver can sustain the alcohol forever. I do wish you all well.
April 1st, 2008 at 9:59 am
I have a problem in that I binge too much. Sometimes I only drink once a week or less. But when I do, I drink until I can’t anymore. Either I pass out or somehow there’s no more drink left.
Sometimes I do this 4 times a week. Although not very often.
The real reason I want to stop is that I know this is a very unhealthy way to live. I also get incredibly bad mental hangovers. Not physical headaches. Oddly, I don’t get them at all! But for about 2 or 3 days after a drinking session I feel depressed and unmotivated. I find it nearly impossible to do anything. So each time I drink it’s 1 evening of being a mess. Then 2 or 3 more of being lazy and depressed. Not to mention all the money I’m spending.
Sometimes I think it’s not realistic for me to quit, because I will always be tempted and be around people who drink, but I can see that what I need to do is create alternative situations where alcohol isn’t the focus. Make friends with people who don’t need to drink to socialise. That’s the big problem with today’s culture. Especially in the UK and Ireland. Drinking is accepted as a social thing. So it’s harder to break out of bad drinking habits when we’re constantly surrounded by people drinking and telling us it’s ok.
Some of my friends definitely have drinking problems too, but are in denial and won’t have a conversation about it. At the same time, I don’t think they’re necessarily as bad as me, as I have also had drug problems in the past. I was addicted to cannibis and smoked it for about 3 years (I also took other drugs, but not as often). I got off cannibis when I was experiencing very bad psychosis and mental problems. I have been in care homes regarding it, twice.
A short time after getting off drugs I started drinking a little, believing this was a safer substitute. It didn’t make me feel paranoid and made me more social. But because of either my personality or state of mind at the time, I quickly found myself drinking a lot and having to drink a lot to get drunk.
I have no control over my drinking, once I start. I can’t moderate myself in a sensible way at all.
Overall I think it’s been a slow process getting more used to binging and needing to binge to get drunk and using alcohol as a way of relieving ’stress’ and making social situations easier.
That worries me though: Why should I have to drink to be social? Why does it take alcohol to bring me out of myself? Why can I only have a good time around people when drink is involved?
Perhaps my problem isn’t as serious as a lot of the people who have written here, but I am quite concerned that if I don’t stop now it will continue to get worse.
April 1st, 2008 at 2:42 pm
Hello Moderate. I am not a drinker, but from my other replies I state that my husband is the alcoholic (although he has not addressed this to the point where he is trying to stop). What I do want to comment on is that my family and I do not drink so being surrounded by people who do not drink is not the cure, although certainly better than being surrounded by those who drink and do drugs. I know that my husband’s drinking is certainly worse (if I can believe it!) when he is out with people who drink. YOU SHOULD try and find yourself a group of people to associate with who do not drink. Although you are the one that needs to physically stop drinking, surrounding yourself with others who do not drink will hopefully help you reach your goals. There is certainly something inherent in those who are alcoholics….that there is a predisposition. I am rooting for you. Don’t give up.
April 1st, 2008 at 4:36 pm
Hi - My husband stopped drinking on 12/27, he drank for 25 years. He was more of a long weekend drinker but as the years went on, he started sneeking a drink or beer in the morning to get motivated. He would drink at least 4 days of the week if not more on some weeks. He had some sort of chemical imbalance and was hospitalized to detox for three days. When he came home he seemed to be doing well. He was subscribed Camprell to supress the urge for alcohol and 0.5mg of Risperdal for the manic episode he had. He was not sleeping well, maybe 1 to 2 hours a night. Two weeks later, he had another manic episode and was hospitalized for two weeks. He was manic for several days. After two weeks of being hospitalized, he came home and was given new prescriptions, Camprell, Depakot and Risperdal. They changed his dosage of Risperdal from 0.5 mg to 4mg a day. He went back to work a week after coming home from the hospital. He has not been doing well at work, he said he cannot focus and seems to become spaced out. He is also suffering from anxiety attacks. He was sent home from work last Thursday and decided he is going to stop taking the mediciations because he felt they were having negative side effects. He went back to work today and he called me because he said he is still feeling confused. Once he talks to me he feels better or if I am in his presence he is okay. I cannot be with him all the time and I want him to live a productive life. Does anyone have any suggestions? Are these commom Alchohol withdrawal symptoms (anxiety, low self-esteem, lack of concentration)? Also, since he stopped taking the medication (which he only took at night) he cannot sleep? Any suggestions on natural medications that will help him sleep? He is 45 years old and I’m praying that these are not going to be life long side effects.
April 1st, 2008 at 10:20 pm
I am 34 .I have been drinking since I was 20 . I never drink during the week .The only time I drink is Friday and Sundays . I was asking myself if I have a problem , I think I answered myself by logging onto this site . When I drink , I have at least 8 rum and cokes and a shot .I have noticed with age I am feeling worse the day after .I am a father of 2 kids , a girl who is 4 and a son who is 2 . I am ready to make a change . If I drink on a Friday night , I am completely tired the whole day on Saturday .My biggest thing with drinking is socal . I am a stay at home dad and I only get out on those days . All my friends are at the local bar . I need someone to give me some advice for cutting back . The rum seems to be my down fall . I drink beer and I can only drink maybe 4 before I am bored with it .
April 3rd, 2008 at 12:49 pm
Hi all, well it’s three weeks since my last drink, nearly had a relapse, but i convinced myself not to, but for some reason I still have a headache, is this normal, my doctor said “it’s a sugar rush”, never had a headache from drinking soda before?, well not one that lasts three weeks!
all the best
April 3rd, 2008 at 1:38 pm
I am 34 and last year met the love of my life. I moved in with her and soon realised that she drank excessively every day, once she starts drinking she cannot stop - she has to take a bottle of wine to bed, even if she only has a few sips. I realised i developed an alcohol problem 9 years ago and abstained for nearly 2 years. I know drink moderately but occasionaly to excess. I can see the pattern in my partners drinking which mirrored my own 9 years ago - not knowing when to stop, aggression, arguementative. She is occasionaly violent when she has been drinking. I have tried to share my experiences with her and offered her methods i used to stop/cut down on how much i drank, but this has no effect. She acknowledges that she has a problem, and she understands that she has messed up previous relationships and risks messing our relationship if she continues to drink. I dont know how to help her further.
April 3rd, 2008 at 10:19 pm
my name is jamey. I am a 17-year-old girl from ohio. I recently got busted at a party and was arrested for underage consumption. i realized that my decision that night was really stupid. I have now been sober for 3 months and it feels great. I have a higher self esteem and i don’t feel like crap all the time. I focus on school more and have recently became closer with friends. I dont plan on drinking anytime soon. I want to wish everyone good luck with your sobriety.
April 4th, 2008 at 10:16 pm
Ok, I’m 26, and drink pretty excessively. My friends all live locally near bars and that is how we socialise. I drink to cut loose and feel less inhibbited. To compound the situation I’m blind, and being around in a bar is often disorienting for me, a rather helpless feeling in unfamiliar circumstances. When I’ve had a few I don’t mind the banter with randoms and saying “Do us a favor, chuck us in the can,” and so on. The issue, asside from the main health issues is I have a romantic view of the drunk artist/poet/musician, all of which I am, stupid I know. I think there is a more underlying issue which causes me to drink but my main problem at the moment is that I think I’m just dull when I’m not drunk. Only second day off, went to a bar last night and had nothing to say to anyone. I must have something to say as I say it when I’m drunk and people like it, but it is getting to that happy carefree state when I’m dry that is the problem. Appart from finding a different set of friends that don’t go to the pub all the time, which I can’t because I love them, has anyone got any suggestions as to how to let the relaxed happy guy out? And no, i’m not trying any other drug, they spend all your money or eat all your food. I need a change of will not social supliment. Hope it goes well for everyone.
April 5th, 2008 at 2:52 am
It’s been 8 days since my husband stopped taking his medication and I’ve seen a drastic improvement. My advice to everyone here is if you can avoid taking medications while detoxing, please try to. We are still working on his self-esteem and anxiety attacks, I”m convinced with time these issues will get better. He is taking 100% natural vitamins. Try taking magnesium, calcium and potasium and aslo a vitamin B Complex (mixture of all vitamin B’s). These vitamins were recomended for alcoholics by our local natural health store. These vitamins help restore the vitamins you lose while drinking, help with anxiety and depression. We also bought Valerian, nighttime. This is a Natural Sleep Aid, it’s 100% natural. It’s actually helping him sleep at night, this is the first thing that helped him sleep. Stop by your local Natural Health Store and buy these natural vitamins, they will help you. I’m not a doctor, I’m just giving my opinion from our personal experience.
April 7th, 2008 at 9:49 am
hi i am a 23 year old female - I never drank until I was 18 when I went to college and then embraced the whole crazy lifestlye fully I played on a sports team and had numerous drunken nites out with blackouts, lost of possessions, embarrasing behaviour, not being able to maintain a relationship. I didnt go out every nite once or twice a week at most but at least two/three times a month having these mental nites out. I have a lot of friends and am a sociable person but I let myself down not all the time but sometimes with stubborn and awkward behaviour. Everyone else knows when enough is enough but its just a large majority of the time it just hits me all of a sudden and then I am a mess. The more drink I have the more I want. It is not the case that I get up and want a drink I could go for weeks without one. After leaving college last year though and now being in a very good job with a lot of responsibility the only time I ever feel really low is after I have gone out on a bender and have embarrassed myself or worried something bad has happened. The majority of my friends now can handle their drink - its just me that cant! After one of these eventful nites out I feel awful ,full of self- loathing, low cofidence, embarrassed, but the only way to cope is just to draw a line under it and say it wont happen again it wont. Everyone just says just go out and have a few drinks i seem to be one of the people that cant. Im sick of hangovers. Not performing as well in sport, feeling embarrassed at my antics, feeling low. I know i am only young and this is the culture unfortunately we live in today where binge drinking is the norm and not frowned on as much as it should be! But I need to stop - how do you tell friends you dont want to drink? has anyone stopped social drinking successfully.
April 8th, 2008 at 2:27 am
I have been drinking more than I should for over 30 years, around 50 units a week. 10 years ago I started working offshore on ships six week rotations. Alcohol is banned. For a long time I thought that the reason I started to feel very healthy and sharp after a few weeks at sea was down to the fresh air, good food and exercise. My blood pressure also fell during my time away. I realise now that this was because there was no alcohol! I have since tried this when I come home and I feel the same way. I feel happier and have more zest. I do have the occasional binge but regret it later. One thing I find is that I can go to social occasions and not drink, yet I feel ‘powerful’ in a way because I don’t need a prop and I can still relax. In fact I find I interact more with people as I can think faster and know what to say. Booze was never a winner.
April 12th, 2008 at 12:03 am
i am now at my lowest point. I so want to give up drinking but in my work place it is not the done thing. I own a pub!
April 16th, 2008 at 12:58 am
I am just as I am named. The frustration has hit an all time high. I am in my third year of university and I can not stop drinking once I have began. I have been pretty good because I haven’t blacked out in a couple weeks, I think, but I had a fall on saturday. I split two forties of rye with a buddy and then I went to the bar. when I got there I saw my ex finance her new beau and my ex best friend who tried to split us up a little over a year and a half ago. So, the first thing I did when I got there was take out $100 and me and my other buddy did 4 tequila shots each. I am a big guy so I try to show people how much I drink I think it is a macho kinda thing but I can’t control it. I don’t think seeing them caused me to drink that much extra, its just that it was just the worst combination of socializing with one buddy and my history causing me to use this vice as an escape. I have a vague rememberance of this night but my buddy said we didn’t do anything stupid but i am nervous i did because it seems I always do. I just want this stress in my life to be gone! Please someone who has been here please help me.
April 17th, 2008 at 4:38 pm
Hi everyone,
I am 51 years old and I drank when I was just in my teen years and finally decided to quit… it’s been over 2 months now, I started and stopped for years just couldn’t stop on my own…. I gave it to God and asked him to help me ever since HE has taken it away, also over a year ago God took my addiction away from smoking, I’ve NEVER felt better in my life…. When all else fails, ask God to take it away HE WILL *_* Good luck to all of you,
God bless <3
April 17th, 2008 at 10:06 pm
im nearly 20 and i have had a drinking problem for nearly 4 years now. I live on my own and it just passes the time. I have tried a couple of times to quit, buit it normally just slows down and the longest slow down was enarly 2 months, i felt very good during this time, but the slightest thing to go wrong and i have to drink, the second i get hiome and dont have to got outt again i drink, i am always hungover and its really breaking me down now, but i cant do it on my own. I have tried AA meetings ut they didnt help. I wish i had never tried the stuff in the first place. i have started to become a bitter perrson porberly because of it and now poeple that i love are taking a wide birth from me because im becoming to tempromental. I have become very very unstable and have started head butting walls and kicking doors down when the anger builds up. Howvery this is when im sobar, as long as im drunk im normally fine, whem im drunk im very content and calm, sometimes i cry for no real good reason. But i do want to quit, but i need some help, the GP said he cant do anything for me, he has diagnosed me with manic depression and OCD, he says that my liver is working OK but my kidneys are strugling a bit. I can feel it too. I dont have the shakes yet, but i dont always grip things when i think i am if that makes snece. I need help but there is nothing out there. I just feel hopeless. Thank you for your time anyway. All the Best. David
April 17th, 2008 at 10:08 pm
Just a p.s to my last comment. It really angers me that there is so much out there to help people quite drugs and smoking, but there is nothing for us alcoholics. It just seems so unfair, all anyone has done to help us is put the prices up on booze, it makes no difference what the price is, if you need it you find the money.
April 19th, 2008 at 12:14 am
dave emaile me at toms5@msn.com i will chat with you about whats going on been there , and some times i still am
April 20th, 2008 at 11:10 am
Help…I am 32 and have been binge drinking every weekend for about 15 years. I feel totally out of control. I suffer terrible anxiety after I drink and my body hurts. I hate alcohol, so why can’t i stop??? Every time I say I’m going to cut down and as soon as I go out that just goes out the window. I’m embarrassed and ashamed. Its horrible.
April 21st, 2008 at 1:12 am
Do not drink all the time, or frequently really. And when i do, I can stay within the normal intake limits. But for the past 24-36months I have had a dozen or so occasions where I have been so drunk, I have blacked out, been cruel to husband. We have young children now. I love wine with the friends, and wish I could continue to enjoy it normally–but that 10% of the time I overdo it is not worth the destructive, embarrassing behavior that leaves me feeling such guilt and remorse. I have made the choice today that this will not happen again–and by that, it means I choose not to drink any more. Cannot believe I am typing this–it is the one area of my life that has been the biggest source of anxiety–so why not end it. Let it go. Be done with it. Wish me luck. I hope I won’t get terribly bored or annoyed when socializing. Arghh!
April 21st, 2008 at 9:13 am
Jess, I completely understand how you feel. I am living this same nightmare. I go out; I am loud, smutty and do things I regret. I can never just have one drink. The following day sometimes I feel so unbelieavbly riddled with anxiety and self-loathing that I fear I may try and end it all. This sounds so ridiculous when I should just stop, but I can’t. The main reason I cannot give up is becuase I feel like I will isolate myself from my friends and that I cannot bear to miss out! I gave up alcohol for 5 months; I was so fed up. I felt so much better within myself but I was ostracised, lonely and damn right frustrated. It sounds like pathetic, I realise this. I think to myself I must have a problem if I will compromise my state of mind for a few lousy nights out just becuase I don’t want to be the odd one out.
April 21st, 2008 at 11:07 pm
hey Jess,
man, I feel like i’m in the same sinking boat as you….. binge drinking every wknd the last 8 years…. 27 now… feel 40..
it’s takin it’s toll…. can bearly talk to people from the anxiety but yet i keep drinking… need to stop….want to stop but allways seem to end up drinking at the wknd…. mind tricks me into drinking…. keeps givin me great reasons to have one..
it’s gone up a gear the last 5 wknds…. have spent 1200 on coke after gettin drunk….
man i gotta stop…
April 22nd, 2008 at 4:20 am
Hello all,
So nice to hear that I am not alone in this rocky boat. I have been binge drinking since I was seventeen and it has resulted in my life just being turned upside down. I will drink sometimes for up to forty eight hours to point of passing out which often takes such a long time. I have put myself in so many bad situations and made so many mistakes that I have lost count. The habits I formed as a teenager have really stayed and now at twenty three, i feel that I am still trapped in these cycles. I had a good friend kill herself last year as a result of her addictions ( alcohol being the main one) and I feel so scared that my own drinking will result in an untimely end. It is such a sad and lonely place to be for anyone.
April 24th, 2008 at 11:58 pm
thanks all going to try my best
April 25th, 2008 at 1:34 am
Hi all! Im 28 yrs and I been drinking for 15 yrs and I can say I really love to drink I feel as if it just makes me a better person all thou I worry soo much that I do drink too much ( everyday ) and very worried about my health, but I always think what would life be with out it? I feel that I will be depressed because booze is the main source of fun for me and to also mention I work at a bar too so which really makes it difficult for me to stop, I used to be a smoker for 5 yrs and I quit (been 8 yrs now) cause I ended up coughing that would not go away. So now I’m thinking if I should just wait till it really hits me and take action from there? or to just stop now completely? yet im afraid that li