Coping with Alcohol Cravings
Coping with cravings is the key to tackling alcoholism. If you can manage to not give in to your cravings, or you can adapt so that you don’t get so many cravings in the first place, then there is no more addiction is there?
How you view your own cravings will determine how much power they have over you. If you believe that a craving won’t naturally go away once it has started, or if you think that the only way to deal with a craving is to drink, then of course you will be fairly powerless over them. This is the cognitive component of your addiction.
Making yourself aware of what things in your life tend to give you cravings, and therefore how you might avoid those situations, becomes a vital skill. For those ‘triggers’ that you can’t avoid, you can learn how to deal with them differently.
Lets say there are four types of cravings:
- a reaction to withdrawal symptoms
- escaping from unpleasant feelings (boredom, depression, anxiety etc.)
- a response to a learnt association (people, places etc)
- enhancing a positive mood
Each type requires a different approach to deal with it. And each person’s approach will be unique to them.
There are six recognised methods for dealing with cravings when they occur:
- distraction
- imagery
- rational responses to automatic thoughts
- activity
- relaxation
- coping flashcards
Distraction – the goal of these methods is to move a person’s attention away from negative internal thoughts or uncomfortable feelings, towards a more neutral external focus. They seem simple, but can all be effective -
- concentrate on your surroundings and describe them to yourself in detail, this can be quite ‘grounding’ when you feel like you’re losing it.
- talk to someone, anyone. A trusted friend, relative, your counsellor or even a total stranger if need be. It can help you get away from that loop running in your head.
- change the scenery – go for a walk, a drive, a bike ride, just get away from wherever you are right now.
- oddly enough, cleaning or other household chores can be perfectly distracting if you’re craving, and you might feel some sense of achievement too.
- video games (or indeed the old fashioned kind) can require enough concentration and challenge to take your mind off it, and of course, you can play them alone.
- I’m sure you can think of some other things to do which are distracting and enjoyable.
Imagery – there are a few different types of imagery which can work -
- command your craving to STOP (see a big stop sign), then refocus on a relaxing location of your choice – a favourite peaceful spot.
- if you start remembering good times when you were drinking, then replace that image with the bad times, your lowest ebb when you felt ashamed and disgusted, do you want to end up back there?
- if it’s negative, depressing images that are giving you cravings, then imagine an optimistic view of your near future, with friends or family, having fun without a drink (or any other positive image).
- if you know you’ve got an event coming up which will give you cravings – try rehearsing the image in your head of you dealing with it appropriately. Run through the feelings you’ll have so you are not caught off-guard by them.
Rational Responses to Automatic Thoughts – whenever you feel a craving, ask yourself “what thoughts are going through my head right now”. Many of the thoughts you are having will themselves be responsible for your craving. It becomes a matter of responding to those thoughts in a more rational way.
- look for evidence to back up or contradict your thought and ask yourself:
- can I look at this situation differently?
- if what I’m thinking is true, what really are the consequences?
- what is likely to happen if I carry on thinking like this?
- what positive action can I take to solve this problem?
Try not to make such catastrophic predictions about your cravings, like “there’s no way I can stand this, so I might as well just drink and get it over with”, “I keep having cravings, so I must be an alcoholic, I can’t beat this…” etc. Cravings usually subside fairly quickly anyway, so just ride it out if need be.
Activity – if you’ve had an addiction to drink for a long time, then you’ve probably not got many hobbies left. In fact quite often, drinking is the only activity you actually do for fun. So when you try and stop, boredom is the biggest hurdle. There’s no way around it – you’re going to have to try some new activities.
When you’ve found a few that you like, make sure you schedule them in every week:
“On Tuesday I’m going swimming, on Thursday I’m going to the cinema with Sally, on Saturday I’m getting out to the countryside for a walk with my partner.”
It will feel weird to some to plan your week this way, but in the early stages of recovery from addiction, it’s essential.
Relaxation – Anxiety, Anger, Frustration and Stress are amongst the biggest triggers for cravings. So learning some relaxation techniques can be a life-saver. If you’re not so tense, you’re less likely to act impulsively. And if you’ve been using alcohol to relax for years, then you are going to have to learn some other methods. Try these:
Simple Relaxation
More Relaxation Techniques
BBC – Relaxation
It will take a while to learn these new techniques, as with any new skill, but keep at it and you’ll be floating around on a cloud of calm like the best Buddhist masters – well, hopefully…
Coping Flashcards – when you’re in the grip of a strong craving, it’s hard to think rationally and remember all the things you’re supposed to. So writing yourself some instructions on a small index card can be useful. (This helps tremendously for people with anxiety too). The priority is to convince yourself that you can cope with this situation. Here’s a few examples of things you might write -
- things are going well with my partner right now, I don’t want to mess it up
- this craving will pass if I just give it time
- I’m not helpless here, what action can I take?
- what are the pros and cons right now?
Remember – It’s just a craving, it won’t kill you. But drinking might…
Read more ways to cope with alcohol cravings…
Awesome job Elizabeth and Hopeful,I am SOO happy and proud of you guys! It actually feels good doesn’t it,especially the longer you go. Just like you guys said,take it ONE day at a time. Like I always say,will I ever drink again,I don’t know………But I won’t drink today! Good job Elizabeth and Hopeful:) Keep going!
Outstanding Elizabeth and Deane…I on the other hand is still struggling. But I will keep trying for as long as it takes. Two days sober and will take it one day at a time. Just see this as a downward spiral.Keep up the awesome work…will check in again soon…Praying for all.
i really want a drink, to escape the way i feel, but i also realise it will just make me feel worse later. i think the main problem is whether u care or not. sometimes its hard, but good luck to everyone, im really struggling here but this page is genuinley useful
hey dee,
you are so so right, it’s a struggle for sure! for the past year i was in a situation that let me become compromised, and i just wanted to escape those horrible feelings. the drinking did help to numb me from the day to day sadness, but in the end, the drinking did nothing. i finally decided that i had enough of a bad relationship and a bad living situation and moved out and on my own. believe me, the bad wasn’t bad in anyone else’s eyes since i was living in an amazing home with a “rich” boyfriend — nobody could imagine how unhappy it was since it looked so “posh”. presently, it’s hard financially, but i’m working on getting my happiness back. i’m on the right road now and drinking isn’t part of the plan right now. i hope you the best… please know that i’m here for you… and anyone else that is struggling too. i’m not perfect, but i’m trying to do the next right thing for today.
hi i am presently living in the same situation in which u were and trying hard to get over it and suring my alcoholic period my wife and kids left me ,its just at that time i raised the quantity of drinks ,but thing got even more worse ………………..but now i have a big NO to this poisonous substance which makes your mind numb and also laeves you nowhere but lets see ..can you tell me how long it takes after quitting alcohol for your mind to work properly as due to that i have whole bodyaches and not willing to go anywhere and i have my office my residence and that is affecting my business very much
It’s been two months now without any drink and no real big desires or cravings to have one. I quit cold turkey, with success that I didn’t think could come to me. Maybe some of you will get to have a taste of sobriety with success like me.
Good for you!
I know I’m only 19 but I’ve been drinking for about 4 years every other day and I feel like I’m becoming dependant. I really don’t want this to happen. It all started where I live where there is t anything to do, and hearing the stories here I don’t want it to effect me later on in life. Recently I’ve been trying and I keep asking myself that I’ll go out and it won’t be that bad, but because it’s easy to get my hands on a pint or two there isn’t any stopping me. It has gotten to the stage where when I drink it doesnt feel I’m drunk because I’m so used to it. Financially it doesn’t help me if I wanted to buy other things that my friends are getting so it doesn’t help in that way. I really hope the advice from this site helps me out a lot. Any additional people that have been thinking this around my age group or similar, give me a shout.
I am in the same boat as you. I am 19 years old and I feel like I’m dependent on alcohol. I don’t know how to get out of this “funk” though.
I’m 26 but have been in this situation for about three/four years now; I’ve never hit rock bottom but I have reached the stage where I just couldn’t study or work effectively. Go see your doctor – they will find someone who can help you. It’s almost impossible to do it alone unless you have incredible willpower, in my opinion.
okay so i guess to come clean, i have to be truthful. im only 18 and yet i find the need to drown myself with alcohol to escape reality, but afterwards im a complete mess and get even more depressed. i really need help and dont know wat to do anymore. any advice?
Ok, so now I am 39 about to turn 40, I am broke for the second time in my life, I am childless and divorced. I was succesful at some points of my life but I seem to head right down the gutter all the time. I drink, not every day, but when I drink, I really drink, I drink quickly (because I want to get as many drinks as possible in my as fast as I can or I get anxious because the bars will close and I won’t get enough) and I only stop when I am close to unconciosuness. I always feel bad afterwards and for the last year I have been trying to quit quite unsuccesfully. I am afraid of admiting to myslef that I can’t control my drinking, I feel ashamed ad weak, I feel that if I stop drinking people will know I have a problem. I am also afraid that I will no longer have a social life, plain and simple I am afraid to not have alcohol as part of my bod anymore. Today I find myself out of excuses, I know I need to quit for good and I know if I quit I can neer drink again, I am not able to have just one , I haven’t been able to do ths for a long time. I can’t be sure, but I think everything that has gone wrong in my life has been due to my drinking, I am pretty sure it was a big part of my divorce and of my financial troubles. I have once again made the decision to stop, I think this time is different beacuse I am accepting my problem and I will not make light of it anymore. I have decided to withdraw from all social activities and keep away from my friends for a while, this would make the beginnig of this journey easier, this morning I broke up with a girl I was dating, I did it beacuse I feel I to need to get better before I date someone seriously and the truth is I am sure I will end up damaging her (I tend to torture my partners psychologically) I didn’t tell her the truth about why I was breaking up with her because I am ashamed about my problem, I think I am doing the right thing. I hope to be strong and I hope I can conquer this problem, god willing this is a new beginning for me. I just wanted to share this with someone as I have never spoken about this to anyone.
I am 42. My six day being sober. I black out everytime I drink and usually ends with strangers picking me up off floors. Alot happened in my past and I drowned in Vodka and cocain followed. I was forced into rehab from Texas to florida to get me away from friends and family. My husband has left me several times and I he kept coming back to all my promises..This time I think he has had it and done with our relationship of 21 years. I make him think his done something wrong, you name it i have twisted beyond the limits. I want to quit and save my marriage but now sorry dosent work(actions louder than words) We havent talked or slept in same bed for a week. he said this last drunk spell was the final draw and even said I probably mentally drained our teenagers and friends that night..Everyone said I went nuts. I CANT REMEMBER CRAP! so I say its unfair cause i dont know what i did. he said whats unfair is its real its a nightmare and we will always remember.
I am ashamed and never want to hurt anyone again..SO good Luck to you..I know this six days havent been so bad, but i am a benger,I drink for 4days straight stay sober for a week. My challenge will start next week..I will pray for you and you pray for me. Just one day at a time.
I read these posts it is like my life over and over. I have been drinking on a regular basis for about 20 years. I am tired of it and everything that goes along with it. I think the only thing that will save me at this point is my Lord and savior. Nothing has helped up to this point. One day at a time and a stong belief in a higher power ! The alcoholic is a very selfish person thinking only of themselves and what they need to do to make themselves feel better. Take the emphasis off you and start thinking of what you can do to make the Lord happy, instead of the devil.
Hi Paul,
I’m 31 and this all sounds really familiar to me. When you say ‘you’re pretty sure’ it was a cause of your past failures, I say I’m positive it was the cause of all mine. The more I look at it objectively the more clear it is that drink was responsible for me almost failing my degree, ruining my music career, losing jobs, causing untold breakups with nice girlfriends, being broke, doing badly at school and so on.
When you come to this realisation its actually very liberating because you realise that its not because you yourself are a failure or there is anything stupid or wrong with you which caused these failures to happen. Drink is not your friend, its your enemy and will take away everything you have. All you need is just one rule which you stick to unquestioningly: I DON’T TOUCH ALCOHOL.
When it come to your friends – think hard whether you are seeing them because you actually want to hang around with them or whether its really the drink you’re looking forward to and they are just a convenient excuse.Could you spend time with them and NOT drink at all? If this isn’t the case they aren’t your friends and you wont miss them one single bit. You’ll actually be glad they are out of your life.
I am successful, attractive, popular and disciplined in so many areas of my life but drinking is something that controls me. I am trapped and can’t escape it. It takes over me and I can’t work out why I do it. Esteem, addiction, started off as a social thing and now it makes me totally unsociable and a complete jibbering wreck. It ruins my respect for myself and people’s respect for me. I need epiphany to help me understand why i do this to myself when without it my life could be so much more richer.
Hi everyone. I’ve had a drinking problem for the past 3 years now, and have only really accepted it today. I have a problem with binge drinking, I don’t drink too often but when I do I make a full of myself. Just ruined a really close friends 21st on the weekend and I feel terrible about it. I’ve always used “I am a student” as an excuse for my binge drinking. But, I graduate soon and will no longer have the protection of the student label come next year. Kinda sad I”m realising this because I graduate soon. The info on this sight though is really helpful. I have just joined a gym as a way of keeping my self active. Maybe my goal at the gym should be to get abs?haha Would have to stop drinking beer for that to happen. Anyway, like i said i really find the info on this site helpful and will update on my progress. Noho ora mai!
totally can relate , to the lowered self esteem , feeling trapped and unable to escape the drink,, but i am definitely convinced i need to do more for myself,, and will folllow some of the suggestions made here