Coping with Alcohol Cravings

coping with alcohol cravingsCoping with cravings is the key to tackling alcoholism. If you can manage to not give in to your cravings, or you can adapt so that you don’t get so many cravings in the first place, then there is no more addiction is there?

How you view your own cravings will determine how much power they have over you. If you believe that a craving won’t naturally go away once it has started, or if you think that the only way to deal with a craving is to drink, then of course you will be fairly powerless over them. This is the cognitive component of your addiction.

Making yourself aware of what things in your life tend to give you cravings, and therefore how you might avoid those situations, becomes a vital skill. For those ‘triggers’ that you can’t avoid, you can learn how to deal with them differently.

Lets say there are four types of cravings:

  • a reaction to withdrawal symptoms
  • escaping from unpleasant feelings (boredom, depression, anxiety etc.)
  • a response to a learnt association (people, places etc)
  • enhancing a positive mood

Each type requires a different approach to deal with it. And each person’s approach will be unique to them.

There are six recognised methods for dealing with cravings when they occur:

  • distraction
  • imagery
  • rational responses to automatic thoughts
  • activity
  • relaxation
  • coping flashcards

Distraction – the goal of these methods is to move a person’s attention away from negative internal thoughts or uncomfortable feelings, towards a more neutral external focus. They seem simple, but can all be effective –

  • concentrate on your surroundings and describe them to yourself in detail, this can be quite ‘grounding’ when you feel like you’re losing it.
  • talk to someone, anyone. A trusted friend, relative, your counsellor or even a total stranger if need be. It can help you get away from that loop running in your head.
  • change the scenery – go for a walk, a drive, a bike ride, just get away from wherever you are right now.
  • oddly enough, cleaning or other household chores can be perfectly distracting if you’re craving, and you might feel some sense of achievement too.
  • video games (or indeed the old fashioned kind) can require enough concentration and challenge to take your mind off it, and of course, you can play them alone.
  • I’m sure you can think of some other things to do which are distracting and enjoyable.

Imagery – there are a few different types of imagery which can work –

  • command your craving to STOP (see a big stop sign), then refocus on a relaxing location of your choice – a favourite peaceful spot.
  • if you start remembering good times when you were drinking, then replace that image with the bad times, your lowest ebb when you felt ashamed and disgusted, do you want to end up back there?
  • if it’s negative, depressing images that are giving you cravings, then imagine an optimistic view of your near future, with friends or family, having fun without a drink (or any other positive image).
  • if you know you’ve got an event coming up which will give you cravings – try rehearsing the image in your head of you dealing with it appropriately. Run through the feelings you’ll have so you are not caught off-guard by them.

Rational Responses to Automatic Thoughts – whenever you feel a craving, ask yourself “what thoughts are going through my head right now”. Many of the thoughts you are having will themselves be responsible for your craving. It becomes a matter of responding to those thoughts in a more rational way.

  • look for evidence to back up or contradict your thought and ask yourself:
  • can I look at this situation differently?
  • if what I’m thinking is true, what really are the consequences?
  • what is likely to happen if I carry on thinking like this?
  • what positive action can I take to solve this problem?

Try not to make such catastrophic predictions about your cravings, like “there’s no way I can stand this, so I might as well just drink and get it over with”, “I keep having cravings, so I must be an alcoholic, I can’t beat this…” etc. Cravings usually subside fairly quickly anyway, so just ride it out if need be.

Activity – if you’ve had an addiction to drink for a long time, then you’ve probably not got many hobbies left. In fact quite often, drinking is the only activity you actually do for fun. So when you try and stop, boredom is the biggest hurdle. There’s no way around it – you’re going to have to try some new activities.

When you’ve found a few that you like, make sure you schedule them in every week:

“On Tuesday I’m going swimming, on Thursday I’m going to the cinema with Sally, on Saturday I’m getting out to the countryside for a walk with my partner.”

It will feel weird to some to plan your week this way, but in the early stages of recovery from addiction, it’s essential.

RelaxationAnxiety, Anger, Frustration and Stress are amongst the biggest triggers for cravings. So learning some relaxation techniques can be a life-saver. If you’re not so tense, you’re less likely to act impulsively. And if you’ve been using alcohol to relax for years, then you are going to have to learn some other methods. Try these:

Simple Relaxation
More Relaxation Techniques
BBC – Relaxation

It will take a while to learn these new techniques, as with any new skill, but keep at it and you’ll be floating around on a cloud of calm like the best Buddhist masters – well, hopefully…

Coping Flashcards – when you’re in the grip of a strong craving, it’s hard to think rationally and remember all the things you’re supposed to. So writing yourself some instructions on a small index card can be useful. (This helps tremendously for people with anxiety too). The priority is to convince yourself that you can cope with this situation. Here’s a few examples of things you might write –

  • things are going well with my partner right now, I don’t want to mess it up
  • this craving will pass if I just give it time
  • I’m not helpless here, what action can I take?
  • what are the pros and cons right now?

Remember – It’s just a craving, it won’t kill you. But drinking might…

Read more ways to cope with alcohol cravings

2,085 Responses to “Coping with Alcohol Cravings”

  1. dean says:

    Hi Dean, for some reason this site seemed to post something I sent to you on the 19th, as tho you had written it!?….Hope you are able to find the note….Hoping all is well with you, looking back at posting, it looks like I first started visiting this site in May of 2013, I mentioned it had cravings for sweets since not drinking wine, your suggestion was fruit juice, that has helped….it has taken me a while to get on the right track, from 2013 haha, Hopefully, I am now! Facing a few “challenges” the next few weekends with Anniversary Parties, 2 Birthday parties, and a Granddaughter’s Wedding, all I will be attending……plus the holidays…..I can do it! BLess You, Margaret

  2. dean says:

    Here it is Oct 19…time to get in touch :), hope you are doing well, I hit 3 months Friday with no wine! When the “urge” hits me to break down, your words and struggle you have been through, along with some of the sayings you have shared from the bible… come to my thoughts!!………Your story of your struggles was very impressive to me, as well as caring for your Grandmother..Thank you for sharing! I still have problems when my husband mentions that’s it cocktail time, when he is having his drink(s)…..I have come to terms, it’s my “PROBLEM” not his that I can’t just have a glass of wine, he is able to have one drink, sometimes 2 and that’s it. I actually am feeling better, sleep better, don’t have the “bloated” look as bad! :) My recent blood test did show better reading of my “fatty liver”.. Wishing you well thoughts…God Bless……..Margaret

  3. Dee says:

    Hi everyone, I am struggling like mad, keep trying different herbs, I feel rubbish in the morning. I pray for us all. My Father died two years ago 25th Oct, he was 74 and a long term alcoholic. I am from a small family, but only my Dad did and I have issues with alcohol. I know I should learn by this, but is so very hard. I also want to say to Meri you are not alone, I care and I know other people will too. Take care all. Dee

    • Dee says:

      Good luck to you, it is a daily struggle to fight the urge to have a drink, just take it one day at a time, maybe find someone on this site that you can relate to, I have, and it seems to help, Dean Moore has an amazing story! I can actually say my overall health I feel much better, not drinking the WINE>.. I am much older than almost everyone on this site, so have had longer to abuse myself, I fight the urge each day, especially at social events……..I just say a little prayer to myself ” one of which is I CAN DO IT, please let me be strong! Keep focused! My best to you, Margaret

      • Dee says:

        Hi Margaret, thank you for your words. I hope you are well, I pray a lot for strength and I hope we can all beat this illness. You are doing really well, I will keep trying and trying. I am using herbs at the moment, but still drinking. Regards Dee.

  4. Meri says:

    Hi everyone,
    I recently quit binge drinking and smoking. I have done very hard drugs in the past and I find it particularly very challenging to stay away from alcohol.
    I’m doing fairly well for my age I have a stable job, my own place, and car.
    However I’m very stressed I recently got foot surgery and have a month off work because of it.
    My family has been going through a lot financially and emotionally and I cant help much. I also feel useless and worthless because I cant walk or go anywhere. My family lives hundreds of miles away so sometimes I forget somebody out there cares about me. I don’t vent to them because I try to be the strong one in the family. I’m always the shoulder everyone cries on.
    I recently got married. I’m so in love with husband. I would do anything for him if it ever came down to it. I’m even trying to do everything possible to get him out of financial trouble, everything from going to debt for him to selling his car for him. I’ve completely changed my habits, style, and friends to make him happy. I wake up and the only thing I look forward to all day is seeing my husband asking him about his day and giving him a kiss. However, he usually comes home pissed off from work and not excited to see me. He would rather do anything than spend time with me. The time we do have to spend together after work, he rather spend going to the pool or doing research on his future he says. If not he’ll do homework for school for 5 hrs or more and stays up all night. When he “stays up all night doing productive stuff” its usually because he’s watching porn I’ve cought him so many times.
    I’m at a point where I don’t even know why he gets mad at me anymore he makes me feel worthless (has called me a worthless drunk) ugly and doesn’t care about my feelings even when I cry which is rare he says my tears are fake. Can you blame me for wanting attention love and intimacy from my husband?
    I’m starting to think he was the one of the worst mistakes I’ve ever made!
    I just want to drink to numb my feelings away and not care about him like he doesn’t care about me and be happy. I know Im not even close to one of his priorities and being in his future and it upsets me so much.
    I just want to turn to drinking again, when I drink I feel like I’m on top of the world. I’m always the life of the party when I would drink. I was happier and practically had a lot of men eating out of my hands and kissing the ground I stepped on. Clubs, body shots, parties and out drinking everyone I was crazy and wild but happy when drinking. Its so hard to not be tempted to go back to that.
    Alcohol made me feel confident and pretty. I feel like no one is here for me or cares about my life but my dogs. I’ve never felt so worthless and lonely but I don’t want to show it or tell anyone how I feel I]m supposed to be the strong one. I feel like alcohol solves my problems temporary and I need that break so bad! Help I need advise

    • Dee says:

      Hi Meri, I am from a small family. I lost my only brother when I was 18yrs old to suicide. My 3 sisters never really bothered much, I am the baby of the family, at 42yrs and a severe alcoholic. Like you I am always a shoulder for people to listen to. I have always been there for family, friends, but most of all my parents. My Dad died aged 74 two yrs ago this month, he was a long term alcoholic. Only he and I had and have alcohol issues. When my Dad died, my sisters turned on me because I said they were not there when Mum and Dad really needed them. I hit a nerve, my Dad saved just enough for his funeral, so no dispute there, I find it hard to forget how nasty my two sisters were, my eldest sister who I never see was fine. I have tried support groups, counselling, AA, now trying herbs. I just want you to that I care and will keep you in my thoughts. Please do not let your husband run you down. You yourself has to think, I am worth who I am and you will find real genuine people when you least expect. I have a handful of friends in the UK, and they are great. Thinking of you Dee

    • Dee says:

      Hi Meri, are you ok? Take care Dee.

  5. maree says:

    Hi everyone. I started reading all your comments a few days ago. I have had a real struggle with alcohol for a number of years. I have a son and a husband who are worried about the amounts i drink on occassion. My son is 12. I also worry about my drinking . I have tried to cut down but its not really working. It works i start feeling proud of myself then my drinking increases again. Im sick of the hangovers and feeling like crap the next morning, im sick of the fear that one day i will die because of my drinking, im terrified of leaving my son and knowing how sad it would make him if i were to die. I want to get better i want to be free of my drinking,but i dont know if i ever will be. All i can do is never give up trying. Please pray for me that one day i will get a miracle.

  6. dean says:

    Sept 20th, I was just checking to see if you had posted anything on the 19th, your usual posting date! I no longer can see the posting that I had sent to you last month about my posting being under your name, I guess that’ because most of my postings are directed to you! Hope things continue to go well with you! I am now 9 weeks with no wine, a record for me! I think of you when I have “struggling” times, how well you have done! My husband isn’t very supportive, he manages to have his 2 drinks before dinner, which is fine, if only he would not keep saying “it’s cocktail time” and saying how good his drink is….very hard sometimes on me,,,,,,,,,,,,but, he is 80 I think going “backwards” very childish acting! I seriously hope everyone on this site that are struggling with the battle of not drinking are able to find someone or something that helps them! I never went on binges, or things like that, only drank wine, 2 bottles a night was too much!!!! I just know that I feel better, which is what my doctor was hoping for, my Liver was “being effected” by the wine, so if for no other reason taking care of the body is very important. at 70 it’s hard to repair the damage done! Blessing be with you….Margaret

    • dean says:

      Hey Margaret, You post is still under my name :) That’s OK. I am still sober. 3 years and 3 months this past Sept. 19. You haven’t had a drink in 9 weeks ? That is AWESOME. If I can quit drinking, anybody can. Margaret, I’ll be praying for you, I hope you don’t mind. And have you gave Jesus a try ? It says in Gods Word (The Holy Bible) That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. Romans 10:9 Confess that scripture Margaret, repent of your sin,and ask Jesus into your heart as your savior. It’s that simple :) And thank you for the kind words and support you’ve shown me Margaret. I appreciate it soo much. I’ll check back on here in the near future.

      • Margaret says:

        Hi Dean……thank you for your scripts readings, I will keep those in mind! I am still on track with no Wine, been under some heavy stress lately, managing to stay strong! My daughter who is 50 (she is single) owns a fishing resort/cafĂ© about 2 hours from me, has a bout with major shin splints, has been put on bed rest, for 6 weeks…….I am trying to help out, lots of “drinkers” live there year around..! they sure repeat themselves a lot! LOL,,, Wow, congratulations on your time “sober”! Bless you! Margaret

  7. Dee says:

    Hello everyone, I have been drinking a long time, I have spoken to a few people on line. I am 42yrs old. At present I am trying some herbal treatments, not sure how long they take to have any affect! I am thinking of you all and pray for strength for us all. Kind regards. Dee

  8. jessica says:

    Hi everyone! I’m Jessica ….I found this site by accident. I was having a craving and trying to learn how to deal with it.
    JESSICA I just read ur reply about your father. My dad also was a alcoholic and drug user and he tried hard to rid of his habits. He eventually passed away at 49yrs old recently. I know how much it hurts to think that they don’t care because if they did they would completely stop!! But like yourself I finally realize its a sickness…
    I’m so happy your dad is trying to cut down with his drinking. I hope eventually he can completely rid of it.
    I myself got on depression pills after my dad died. My drinking went out of control as well as me experimenting with cocaine. I got alcohol poisoning twice I was taken to the hospital. I didn’t care nor listen to the drs. I continued to drink. I binge drink. I contemplated suicide as well. I did feel all alone. I embarrassed myself and hurt people I loved and cared about. So I thank you for the post. I felt exactly as you said alone and nobody cares.
    I do realize I drink when bad things happen stressing situations. I see that recently about myself. I only been completely sober for a short amount of time but already I feel and look so much better inside and out. Alcohol and drug addiction is a huge problem in both sides of my family. Losing many family to both young and old. Its sad.
    I think of my dad at times and think how I don’t want my life to be cut short over stupid decisions that eventually kills you in the end.
    He will not be here for my wedding, kids, and life in general and it makes me so sad and angry at him. But life goes on no matter how much I miss him. We were very close. He was so young to die!!
    To anyone out there sick with this disease know we love you still no matter what.. I love and loved my daddy no matter what decisions he continued to make.
    God bless you all and have a blessed day! I find content reading all of your life experiences and positive words!!!! Thank you!!!

    • caitriona says:

      hey Jessica I read ur post and my dad is in his 50s and he is stil drinking everyday and hes getting more ill as I speak I ended up social aswell due to my drinking and now I wanna stop drinking for my kids its scary and not im starting to forget things I don’t no if its due to the drinking or what not I just want it to go away I was on medication for my suicidal thoughts and they didn’t help me at all I ended up drinking ontop off them to clear my mind and ometimes I would drink and walk about not knowingwhere I am going its crazy I rewally want help to stop drinking

    • scott says:

      thank you. im 48, been drinking for longer than i can remember!!! .
      to read your bible was a help, still jes… how do i stop !!

  9. dean says:

    Hi Dean, Oh, I didn’t take your remark as being rude at all, or a smart alec……I guess since I mostly talk to you, this site must have made us like FaceBook friends…which if fine with me!! I replied to you earlier, but not sure where that was posted or if this might be a doubt reply!! Your story impressed me from the first day I read it, I guess have told you that before! Again no offense was taken by your remark! Have a blessed birthday….Margaret

  10. dean says:

    Dean, I did not take your remark as being rude, or a smart alec at all……..since I really only chat with you, I guess this site has made us “FB” type of friends :), which is fine with me………Your story so impressed me as I have said before! No offense was taken at all!! Have a very blessed birthday! Margaret

  11. dean says:

    Posted on my facebook page yesterday. Dad told me that Darian was really proud of me getting sober and staying sober. Most of you know I moved in with my grandma about a month and a half of my sobriety date. She has alzheimers disease, and I took care of her 24/7 for 2 years and 8 months. She is in longterm care at Richfield nursing facility now. I had days that would drive a normal person to drink. I went through multiple stints in detox between 2000 and 2011. I lived in a rehab facility for 30 days and completed a 30 day program during that span of time. I’ve been in after care a couple times, committed myself to the hospital on occasion because of my alcoholism. Darian knew what I came out of and I think he was really surprised that I stayed sober for the period of time that I did. I reached the point that one day sober was a miracle for me. When I first got sober, the first 13 months I tried to read atleast an entire book of the New Testament in the Bible everyday. Somedays I read more, some days less. I began to pray daily and develop a relationship with God and His only Son Jesus. Somewhere along the line, He took the desire for alcohol (and even drugs) away from me. Darian passed away this past Feb. unexpectedly. We were identical twins, 18 minutes apart. He was born first. Through it all, no matter what, I’ve yet to pick up a drink or even get high. Still today, the first prayer I say everyday, I thank my Heavenly Father for another day sober, for giving me the strength, desire and wisdom to stay sober, and for taking the desire for alcohol and drugs away from me in Jesus name. I’ve not had as much as one sip of alcohol, nor have I smoked any pot or done any drugs in this time. I’ll celebrate my first birthday this weekend without being a twin in this world. This post is for you Darian. I made it another month. I am 3 years 2 months sober. Happy Birthday bud

  12. dean says:

    Dean, August 19th, just checked to see if you had posted today!! I now have 4 weeks behind me without drinking any wine! I don’t drink anything other than wine! at 70 it’s hard to change your ways! I think it’s wonderful to see so many younger ones trying to change their ways! I am sure your story has or will help many! Hope things continue to go well for you! God bless, Margaret

    • dean says:

      Margaret, congratulations. Your post is under my name :) did you notice that ?

      • dean says:

        Dean, yes I did notice that my reply was under your name! I am so sorry to hear of your twin brother passing away, that is a tough one. My daughter had a very dear friend pass away a few months ago also a Twin, occasions are very difficult for him since he and his brother did so much together. You have been faced with lots of situations that could have weakened you, faith and strength be with you! Have a nice birthday, just know that your Brother is watching over you and celebrating from above! Have lots of ice cream and cake….Best Wishes, Margaret

      • dean says:

        Magaret, I wasn’t trying to be a smart alec when I was saying your comment was under my name, I was just asking if you knew it. It doesn’t bother me. Just want to let you know I wasn’t trying to be rude :)

  13. Jessica says:


    You are not alone in your struggle. My dad also drinks 6 beers or more a night & struggles with depression. I am always worried that he might try to hurt himself, but similar to you I think he has had suicidal thoughts but is scared to follow through. I encourage him to quit drinking but I know it is extremely difficult. However alcohol is a downer & it will make you feel worse about yourself. If you already battle with depression alcohol enhances that feeling of being alone, of no one caring, & that you are a disappointment. But I guarentee you that someone out there does care about you & that you have not disappointed them as much as you think you have. & I also know that those people you think would get over your death in a month’s time, won’t. When I think of the state of depression my dad battles with when he drinks it makes me sad because I know that he loves me but it’s like the alcohol prevents him from realizing how much he means to me. He is not a burden to me, but a blessing! & I know he wishes he could quit drinking cold turkey, but he has taken great strides to cut the amount of beers he drinks each night in half. & that makes me proud! I know quitting can’t happen overnight, it is a process & it took me a long time to understand that. But by cutting back 1 beer every couple weeks, it tells me he is trying & that I am worth him trying to quit so that he can prolong the amount of time he can spend on this earth with me! So I write this to encourage you. If you think no one cares about you, I am a complete stranger & I care, so how much more do you think your own family members or those closest to you must care. You are not a coward for not wanting to commit suicide, it just shows that you have things you still want to live for. I think those people & things that prevent you from wanting to die can also be your inspiration for wanting to quit or cut back on drinking. Whether you want to develop a better relationship with your spouse, you want to be around to watch your grandkids grow up…whatever it is that you care about (& you will know what you care most about because it is the things you feel most guilty about when you drink), use that as your motivation! I hope it helps to know someone who doesn’t even know you cares & am glad that you were brave enough to admit how you felt on here. Keep progressing…even baby steps are forward motion! I am praying for you!

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