Coping with cravings is the key to tackling alcoholism. If you can manage to not give in to your cravings, or you can adapt so that you don’t get so many cravings in the first place, then there is no more addiction is there?
How you view your own cravings will determine how much power they have over you. If you believe that a craving won’t naturally go away once it has started, or if you think that the only way to deal with a craving is to drink, then of course you will be fairly powerless over them. This is the cognitive component of your addiction.
Making yourself aware of what things in your life tend to give you cravings, and therefore how you might avoid those situations, becomes a vital skill. For those ‘triggers’ that you can’t avoid, you can learn how to deal with them differently.
Lets say there are four types of cravings:
- a reaction to withdrawal symptoms
- escaping from unpleasant feelings (boredom, depression, anxiety etc.)
- a response to a learnt association (people, places etc)
- enhancing a positive mood
Each type requires a different approach to deal with it. And each person’s approach will be unique to them.
There are six recognised methods for dealing with cravings when they occur:
- distraction
- imagery
- rational responses to automatic thoughts
- activity
- relaxation
- coping flashcards
Distraction - the goal of these methods is to move a person’s attention away from negative internal thoughts or uncomfortable feelings, towards a more neutral external focus. They seem simple, but can all be effective -
- concentrate on your surroundings and describe them to yourself in detail, this can be quite ‘grounding’ when you feel like you’re losing it.
- talk to someone, anyone. A trusted friend, relative, your counsellor or even a total stranger if need be. It can help you get away from that loop running in your head.
- change the scenery - go for a walk, a drive, a bike ride, just get away from wherever you are right now.
- oddly enough, cleaning or other household chores can be perfectly distracting if you’re craving, and you might feel some sense of achievement too.
- video games (or indeed the old fashioned kind) can require enough concentration and challenge to take your mind off it, and of course, you can play them alone.
- I’m sure you can think of some other things to do which are distracting and enjoyable.
Imagery - there are a few different types of imagery which can work -
- command your craving to STOP (see a big stop sign), then refocus on a relaxing location of your choice - a favourite peaceful spot.
- if you start remembering good times when you were drinking, then replace that image with the bad times, your lowest ebb when you felt ashamed and disgusted, do you want to end up back there?
- if it’s negative, depressing images that are giving you cravings, then imagine an optimistic view of your near future, with friends or family, having fun without a drink (or any other positive image).
- if you know you’ve got an event coming up which will give you cravings - try rehearsing the image in your head of you dealing with it appropriately. Run through the feelings you’ll have so you are not caught off-guard by them.
Rational Responses to Automatic Thoughts - whenever you feel a craving, ask yourself “what thoughts are going through my head right now”. Many of the thoughts you are having will themselves be responsible for your craving. It becomes a matter of responding to those thoughts in a more rational way.
- look for evidence to back up or contradict your thought and ask yourself:
- can I look at this situation differently?
- if what I’m thinking is true, what really are the consequences?
- what is likely to happen if I carry on thinking like this?
- what positive action can I take to solve this problem?
Try not to make such catastrophic predictions about your cravings, like “there’s no way I can stand this, so I might as well just drink and get it over with”, “I keep having cravings, so I must be an alcoholic, I can’t beat this…” etc. Cravings usually subside fairly quickly anyway, so just ride it out if need be.
Activity - if you’ve had an addiction to drink for a long time, then you’ve probably not got many hobbies left. In fact quite often, drinking is the only activity you actually do for fun. So when you try and stop, boredom is the biggest hurdle. There’s no way around it - you’re going to have to try some new activities.
When you’ve found a few that you like, make sure you schedule them in every week:
“On Tuesday I’m going swimming, on Thursday I’m going to the cinema with Sally, on Saturday I’m getting out to the countryside for a walk with my partner.”
It will feel weird to some to plan your week this way, but in the early stages of recovery from addiction, it’s essential.
Relaxation - Anxiety, Anger, Frustration and Stress are amongst the biggest triggers for cravings. So learning some relaxation techniques can be a life-saver. If you’re not so tense, you’re less likely to act impulsively. And if you’ve been using alcohol to relax for years, then you are going to have to learn some other methods. Try these:
Simple Relaxation
More Relaxation Techniques
BBC - Relaxation
It will take a while to learn these new techniques, as with any new skill, but keep at it and you’ll be floating around on a cloud of calm like the best Buddhist masters - well, hopefully…
Coping Flashcards - when you’re in the grip of a strong craving, it’s hard to think rationally and remember all the things you’re supposed to. So writing yourself some instructions on a small index card can be useful. (This helps tremendously for people with anxiety too). The priority is to convince yourself that you can cope with this situation. Here’s a few examples of things you might write -
- things are going well with my partner right now, I don’t want to mess it up
- this craving will pass if I just give it time
- I’m not helpless here, what action can I take?
- what are the pros and cons right now?
Remember - It’s just a craving, it won’t kill you. But drinking might…
Hi, I’ve been drinking heavily since my 20s, i’m now 50 and still drinking half bottle of gin per night 7 days a week. I have pain right across under my ribs and convinced that I have gone too far with damaging my liver, therefore I think to myself sometimes that why bother to stop i’ve already done the damage. I have a son 22 and daughter 19 who are both worried about how much I drink. I hold down a steady job and have not had a day off in over 20 years, but the last straw came this week when I was asked by my new boss to do a job while he watched me. I couldn’t stop my hands shaking and made an excuse that I felt queezy and unwell. I really do have to do something about this now. I didn’t have a drink last night but had vivid nightmares which made me jerk and sweat all night. I have a terrible craving to drink now, but I need to STOP NOW. HELP IT IS SO HARD!
I’m an alcoholic,from Mexico city,and I was having a craving,so I looked for help in the Web,and I found you,guys.You don’t know how much you have helped me.It’s clear to me that you know what you are talking about.Thanks a lot,my friends…see you
Just came across this website. Really made me feel less lonely reading everyone’s stories. It’s such a shit hole isn’t it? I always compare it to being stuck in a dark dark hole and only seeing a bit of sunlight from above and desperately trying to climb to the top to get out and just as you’re about to get out you lose your footing and fall back down. I 31 years old. I’ve wasted all my 20’s away drinking. I am now trying to get on the right path. But the fucked up thing is that after drinking for sooooo long abd I mean heavily….id have a beer and a painkiller in the morning like people have coffee and toast….it seems like it just takes over who you are. You’re nobody. You have no hobbies, no interests, nothing….because for so long your full time job was drinking. And it truely is….do I have enough money for today? When can I get it? Oh shit, they don’t start selling till 9 am! Where can I stash this so my husband doesn’t see? Oh well, I guess I’ll just replace the vodka later, in the meantime I’ll just fill it up with water so it doesn’t look like I had any…..it goes on and on….do I have my mints with me? Figuring out the quietest way to open a can of beer so no one hears…it is EXHAUSTING. I remember I once was going to recovery group meeting daily and they made us write a goodbye letter to alcohol as if it was our lover….the image that automatically popped into my head was obviously an abusive partner…I wrote…” You slammed me down on the cold floor with your grip tightening around my neck making it hard to breathe while you tenderly whispered in my ear “I love you.” That’s how I feel about my relationship with alcohol. Abd just like women or men even who come out of abusive relationships it’s the same…feelings of shame, worthlessness, self loathing. But there has to be a way. We must rise above that. I’m still trying to figure it out. I’ve reduced DRAMATICALLY. for which I am proud. I was a raging alcoholic and pill popper. I have gone down to 3 drinks a day which is huge for me. That was usually my morning. So hopefully tomorrow it’ll be 2. I know I can do it. Life is so beautiful on the other side. You’re FREE! Free of the demon. That is the best gift you can give yourself…and your family. It’s hard but you can do it. You are stronger than you think. Give yourself some credit. To all out there suffering…my heart is with all of you. We can do this guys! Let’s kill the beast! Who’s with me!! Much love to all of u. ❤️❤️Stay strong!
I really love your comment ( YOUR STRONGER THAN YOU THINK)
CONGRATULATIONS! Your story was relatable and inspirational. Blessings
As in congratulations on your inspiring success!
I have found that L-Glutamine and 5HTP can help with my cravings.
hi all your readings mean alot to me and i do understand ,but i myself are finding every day hard. I LIKE a drink to much but some times do not know when to stop, yes i do but there is a voice in my head that says you can. Being a victim of being abused at a young age and carry on into ,,not telling my husband what was happening. bev stop he did admit to abusing you from the age of 16. but not my brother.LOL lost court case. i am a strong person but now i am tired ,i have no energy and i am depressed. Been on loads of antidepressants and early menopause from 39 joke.i am feeling sorry for my self ,but do not deserve it.sorry i am sure there are more people out there that are feeling like me.so sorry for my reply never done this before.
Hi everybody ,I’ve had a problem since I was in my 20’s… I have managed pretty well after my first unprepared detox scared me into respecting the drink more…just over the last few years I’ve gotten to the stage where I hide it , carry bottles with me , drink in the middle of the night, at work and generally most of the time … I got wasted at work (again to cope with stress,
and blamed it on the underlying
stress ) I’ve flown back home to
deal with it … Probably going to lose my job… I’m waiting to hear … Anyway Ive just tapered off when I’ve just realised I have a bottle of vodka hidden in one of my cars here and the craving is killing me… I’ve taken steps to get help… Called my doctor … Arranged an online AA meeting and told a few loved ones but now I’m left alone in the house I’m so anxious A because I pretty much know I’m gonna drink it B because I’m anxious anyway and C when I drink it I’ll be wasted and have to hide it again ……. Trying to ride it through but sooo tough and I really don’t wanna be like this anymore ….gonna try and hold off … Hope your all doing well
ive finally admitted to myself that i need help, suffering with depression after my daughter was born i started drinking .. it broke mine and her dad up it was only once a week then it got out of hand and became everynight and living on my own with only my daughter i didnt need to hide it from anybody,although family have known for years that ive had a problem ive always said ive finally gotten it under control and i cant carry on lying to myself anymore, my mum is ill with cancer and we have less than a year with her and i got drunk at her house lastnight and said some horrible things to her and my daughter who is only 7 as a result my auntie has taken my daughter to stay with her until i can get help.. i hate being this way and i want to change so badly and be the mum i know i can be and daughter.. ive booked an appointment with my doctor for tomorrow and i really want to get this under control but i have so many triggers im finding it inpossible, even after all that has happened and how discusted i am with myself im drinking a bottle of vodka tonight… im scared that even this hasnt been enough to open my eyes and im not sure what its going to take
There is a good book called 7 weeks to Sobriety….she suggests that supplements like L Glutamine and 5htp can help with moods and cravings….I also take something called Kratom…it is a natural plant that really helps with my moods…but it can be a bit addictive…but I think it is much better and healthier than alcohol…it is kind of a natural antidepressant
Ive been sober for 10 months & I’m thinking about drinking tonight. I just feel so alone cuz I’ve lost my wife becuz of alcohol & all my friends still drink & although I’ve worked really hard to maintain sobriety, I just don’t think I can take it anymore. I’m really confused & conflicted about what to do..I just don’t want to be..alone anymore & I guess booze is my only friend, even tho I know it’s my enemy & destroyed everything I love. Damnit.
Hi I know how u feel please don’t start drinking again couse I live with my alcoholic husband for 12 year’s it’s a struggle everyday I know he can’t stop without help and h doesn’t want help so I don’t know how much longer I can keep up can I ask whys your wife not coming back when u stop?
Don’t do it man, it’s fixable!
Is 90 days today I go sober without a drop of alcohol in my system , my major problem is FEAR anxiety and bad thoughts coming to my head repeatedly refusing to go away , I fight to forget it and concentrate on something new but it will occupy my thoughts, everywhere is there constant , when I was drinking I don’t have this thought what can I do, the thoughts leave me sleepless unhappy and confused, when will I be totally clean and live normal life again, 6 months or one year?
See your doctor about your bad thoughts.You may need to do some cognitive therapy or some sort of counselling.Face your fears…stay sober…you are heading in the right direction.God Bless you
PharmaGABA (over the counter, at least, in the U.S.) might help your mind slow down so you can sleep. It’s an amino acid and calming neurotransmitter; it needs to be in balance with glutamate (also an amino acid and neurotransmitter, but an excitatory one).
The intrusive thoughts sound horrible. I wonder if low-dose lithium orotate (over the counter in the US) would help a bit.
Wishing you wellness.
Thanku great website
Hi i so relate to the above from age 16 to 39 ive constantly drunk pour wine at 4 pm when doin boys dinner so bored and tryin to forget troubles i drink, most nite lose memory and get to three bottles , had therapy nine months now best thing ive ever done. i split with 4 guys in 8 years to do with drinking , my boys are not building new home and we working as a three family. dont need the drink enjoying life with out and been dating my new guy 3 months all ok we dont have drink together xx
Hi anon.
Thank you for posting your story so far. I only came across it yesterday but I was very much in the same place as you a month ago. Your story is a mirror of my dependence, the hiding, the guilt, the embarrassment, the shame.
I looked for help a month ago and started going to AA here in England. Being in a room of people who truly understand the hell that we are going through was a massive relief. It’s almost impossible for a non alcoholic to understand why we do it and that we are not trying to hurt the ones we love.
Yesterday I was so close to drinking until I found your post, it reminded me of where I was a month ago and how far I’ve come. Thank you for helping me. I really hope that you’ve made some progress too, it’ll be a long road for all of us but through AA support I’m finding the strength. There is a life for us all after the booze, we just have to be strong and get real support. Good luck.
Myles
I am 32 years old been an alcoholic for 6 years I drank 2 bottles of rose wine a night and 2 ciders , lost my mates, my driving license , couldn’t think straight made a total total balls up of my life! Don’t get me wrong I work hard for a living and always wanted my own garage but drink has scrambled my head and I’ve lost all ambition I woke up last Saturday with a major hangover and I thought no I’ve had enough! 1 week sober and I feel like a different person I just keep thinking positive and saying to my self I can’t wait till Christmas to see the new me!! It’s a goal I’ve set and I’ll try my hardest alcohol is a demon !!! And dnt forget it …..
I am 28 years old and have slowly become an alcoholic over the years. After I got done with college I moved back in with my parents for a couple of years to save money, then moved back out around 26. During the time that I lived with them I adopted many of their drinking habits. I would consider them very high-functioning but non-admitted alcoholics. They both drink quite a bit every single night.
My Mom and I are literally best friends. She drinks about a bottle of wine every night, starting around 4:30 or 5 every night. I have never seen her drunk, maybe just a little tired and slurry. But being so close with her, every time she would pour herself a glass of wine she would pour one for me too. We have so much fun together and I would always take the glass of wine, and that would lead to another glass, then another, then another. Spending so much time together, it kind of became our thing. By the time I moved out this had become a habit for myself that has going increasingly worse throughout the last few years. Now I have so many triggers that I consistently give into, and pass out every night guilty that I have yet done it again. I have not had an alcohol free night for months and months.
I don’t think my husband has any idea of my problems, and I don’t want him to. He has several family members who are full-fledged alcoholics and he has always made the comment that there is nothing worse than an alcoholic. I have gotten to the point where I hide alcohol in the house each night, so he does not see that I drink WAY more than the two glasses he thinks I have. I feel so ashamed but I don’t know how to stop. I run my own business from home so it is always on the forefront of my mind. “Do I have enough alcohol for tonight? Do I have extra alcohol stashed away to sneak sips off of? I need to leave to go get more alcohol before my husband gets home. Oh, it’s 4:30, should I start drinking now or should I attempt to wait another hour or two? Oh hell, I’ll just start now. I’m cooking dinner for my husband, pour a glass of wine! I am watching my favorite tv show, wine! I am still working and it has hit 5:00, pour myself a glass and get the creative juices going! Uh oh, it’s 9pm and I don’t feel drunk enough to easily fall asleep, pour myself more. ” The list goes on. I am so helpless and so deep into this.
I feel so lonely and depressed. No one has any idea that I have this secret addiction. They think I am a bubbly happy active person (which I do appear to be during the day, but when 5pm starts, my secret life kicks back in). I wake up every morning with a headache and guilt about drinking the night before. I am delaying pregnancy with my husband telling myself I have to kick this first or I am going to go crazy not drinking alcohol for 9 months. I am so worried that my Mom and I’s relationship will change if I stop, or reduce my drinking.
The thing is, I wish I could simply reduce my intake to just 2 glasses a night but have yet to do so, in fact it just seems to keep increasing. I simply don’t know what to do anymore, I feel so alone : ( It is crazy, I have never told anyone any of this… no one has any idea, and I really don’t want them to know. I do have many people in my life who are very judgemental and hurtful and would not be sensitive to this subject, and maybe even rub my face in it. I feel like this is a battle that I am going to have to keep to myself, other than talking to people on platforms such as this. So for the rambling. It actually feels pretty good to have this out. I anyone can relate or can offer any advice I would be so grateful.
Hallo annon. Thank you so much for sharing your story. I am now 27 years old and have struggled with addiction for eleven years. I started early developing this problem. I am now clean for 7 months and today felt like having a drink until I read your comment abd remembered how bad it gets once I start plus im pregnant and have a todler. The biggest thing I have learnt over the years is to speak up amd ask for help. You will be suprised at how many people wants to help you even if its not your pwn family but total strangers who will support you throughout the whole ordeal. I couldnt do it on my own. The first step is to admit to someone that you have this struggle thats when a change will happen but as long as you dont do something different than what your doing right now nothing will change. Ask yourself honestly if you actually want to change? Coz until you can make that decision you will keep stuck in this place you find yourself in. Before having a drink phone someone to talk you through it even if you still decide having one. Most important thing is talk about it. Hope it helps….
Goodluck darling be strong for both of you darling xx
Im so sad to read this honey i understand your situation more than anyone could ever now but the cold truth is no matter how many people you can talk to the only person that can help u is your self. i got to the stage were so many bad things were happening because of my alcohol intake. i have a 4 year old son the reality is if i carry on down this road i will loose him he is my life plus i literally had bad stomach that was somtimes uncontrollable everyday when i drank i couldnt control my bowls. im only 42 and dont want to end up with a colotomy bag or worse. i have only been 9 days sober but for once am really gona try and either quit completly or drink responsibly. realistickly the one for me is to stop altogether as i have a addictive personallity it used to be cocaine then alcohol somtime even overeating its a everyday struggle but im going to do my best. i wish u all the best please try and live yourself to help yourself
Literally everything that you have said has been exactly what I’ve been going through. My husband really has no idea about my problem even though I have been stashing tequila in the. Closet. I just wanted you to know you are not alone and I feel thankful to have read this and know people struggle as I do.
Hi anonymous, thanks for your post. Your worry about disrupting your relationship with your mum is exactly how I feel - I am scared that if I don’t have a drink or 5 with my mum like we always do it’ll hurt her feelings, or we won’t talk in the same way/ be as close. Have you resolved your issue? Are you trying life sober yet? Because one thing that came to me whilst thinking this over is that my mum occasionally tries to cut out drinking - I’d generally consider her as a high functioning and non-admitted alcoholic, but that she has these odd moments of wishing to be sober indicates that on some level she knows she has a problem and wants to change. And maybe my quitting would help her with that - maybe she’s been worrying that if she quit it’d affect our relationship? If there’s one thing I’m starting to notice it’s that alcoholics think the same because booze is doing their thinking for them. So yeah, maybe your quitting would help your mum and you?
Hi
I understand that craving time starts at 4pm while cooking dinner! But I am currently trying Viramins to try and control the drinking …. And it seems to be working. See a natrrapth and they will prescribe what may work for you, knowing there are no side affects and you actually are repairing the damage alcohol does to your body. Ok not completely cured but getting there. For a start if u drink take a daily B complex vitamin everyday. Also thiamine 3 times a day, these for starters have stopped the hangovers, which takes away that horrible head ache and the guilt… Niacin also should be taken and this one seems to help with the cravings. L-glutamine should also be included to control the cravings and it really works, take with meals.
Vitamin c also assists I take one a day. And finally milk thistle this repair and protects the liver.
Dosages vary, so start on the minimum and work up from there. There is plenty of info online to assist with dosages or as mentioned see a natrrapth.
I am healthier and have a lot more energy yes I still drink but it’s controlled I think my body is so full of vitamins that I don’t crave the drink. Also when taking any of these vitamins drink heaps of water as I believe this also helps with the cravings. The only side affects I have found Diarreah … But just curb the dosage and that’s fine. Include excercise every day even walking swimming it all helps-as a result I have also lost weight which is a great side affect.
Try the vitamins u have nothing to lose and only to gain as I have , Good Luck ,,
Omg!! I feel like my inner self wrote this post. I never knew there was some one exactly like me!!!
This sounds just like me…..only a small few and i mean about 3 or 4 very close family know there are issues. But i became very secretive about my drinking….and its a well known sign that you are on a very slippery slope….i can drink spirits that would knock 5 men out and still get up in the morning without hardly a hangover….this has worried me and am now getting help with a alcohol therapist, group therapy and i’m going to my 1st AA meeting on monday…..please tell someone and get help….i know the drink will destroy me, both physically and mentally and i’m worth more than that and so are you…..i know its a while since you written this but hope you have sought help from someone…..take care..
I’m hoping to stop drinking as it’s at a point now we’re I’m drinking 6 cans a night . I work have lovely family lovely home in fact I have a lovely life . But I think I drink way to much it’s a habit I just fall into over years . I don’t get drunk but I think that’s because I drink so much I’m use to it ..
I don’t go to pubs I drink at home I put it down to being board on the night times but this problem runs In my family I have lost so many of my family because of there drinking .
every day I say I’m not having any tonight but once I’m sat down kids off doing there own stuff husband doing his stuff I say sod it and go get cans .. but even while I’m drinking them I’m saying why am I doing this but I’m finding it so hard to say no and stick to no ..
moan over thanks for listening
You’re not alone. I do the same thing, great life, job etc, I just keep giving in. but NO MORE! My life, wife, and family are too precious for me to throw it all away for some cans. It’s really stupid if you think about it. I wish you the best
I don’t really know where to start . I’ve just found this site today and need people in my situation to talk to . I’m embarrassed to finally admit I have a drinking problem and I can slowly see its getting worse . I need to stop . I’m drinking more or less daily , I’m having the occasional black out , forgetting things and arguing with my partner ( we don’t live together it’s a newish relationship so therefore my issue is hidden from him). I’m 43 yrs old and a single mother . Once I start drinking I can’t stop until I’m drunk . I’m putting myself and my children in dangerous situations . I’m starting out by doing the 7 day challenge I found on this website . So today is day 1.
Did you complete the 7 day challenge
Hi, I have just come across this website too as I have realised I need to stop drinking so much. I drink wine every evening.
Its a hard thing, tryin to quit. I thought i was stronger than most to give it up whenever i wanted to. It mostly works for when i resolve to drink once a month, i somehow do it at least for a few months. The problem is, i feel defeated enough to give up. I crave for the false courage and nonchalance alcohol brings with it. It becomes stronger as i feel more solitary. Have been an alcoholic for some time, wish i could quit completely. I need help for which i am too afraid to ask. It has ruined every semblance of what i used to be. This is not living, just existing, just breathing.
Praying for you Nisha
Hi, I am now almost at my 4th month of sobriety from alcohol. I was a real drunk, I was not drinking everyday, but when i was not, it was because I was still hungover for couples days from my 2 or 3 days drinking. It was not like this at first, but since a year or maybe 2, a drunk night would go on for at least 2 days. Terrible feeling to sober up after 3 days of drinking, I could not do it anymore and I was eventually going to just die from my heavy drinking (I could drink like a champ a 24 a night.)
So I after a couple times of a month off, and going back, I finally found a way to stay sober and cut the cravings, I read a lot of specialists books about addictive thinking, and neuroscience books about the effect of drugs and alcohol on the brain. It helped me a lot understanding what was going on and then taking control over it. I still have cravings, (like today it would not go away) But I keep in mind the enthusiasm of having the control of my own life instead of letting the alcohol or other people take it.
I hope my sharing can help other people to keep their head out of the water and finaly breathe.
I appreciated each one of your comments and it helps me a lot understanding my own addictive thinking.
Thank you.
I’m 19 & for the past year I’ve become a alcoholic.. It takes my pain away fills the empty space that I feel. I’ve turned into something I don’t even know anymore, it’s ripping me away from my family they can’t even bare me sometimes. I drink when I wake up till I pass out, I don’t want to live like this anymore I’m to young to live like this, but nothing else can take the empty feeling away or the loneliness.. I need help but I don’t know how to go about it. I’ve been in two wrecks because of drinking & driving & I don’t want to kill anyone I wouldn’t know what to do with myself. I can’t talk to my family because I feel like no one understands me.. I need help, is there even away to get out ?
You are still very young and it is a good thing you realize now your problem before it goes too far (because it gets worse over time if you keep going on)
I totally understand when you are talking about the void. Yes alcohol fills a void and feels so comfortable when we don’t know how to cope with it, but don’t desperate, yes you can do it, and it feels good to.
I strongly suggest you start with a fast help you can get. You should call your local AA section and ask for a meeting where you can go (sometimes they have a small meeting before the meeting with new people.
I know it feels weird at first and it is so hard to go in there the first time ( I think the first time i circled the block 10 times before resolving myself to go in) But afterward, you will feel so relieved and like you did something good for yourself. People are gonna help you and show you how you are not alone in this.
It is really important you don’t try to do it alone.
There are a lot of other ressources, but the first step is really to go sober for a couple days and think clearly.
I hope you will at least give it a shot, and I sincerely hope for you to get better because I know how is the alcohol prison.
You are not alone
Becca, its good you called for help. I am an alcoholic and have been sober for 20 twenty years but i know one drink can take me back that hell again. You cant go sober on your own, alcoholism is a mean disease. First of all get on your knees and cry out to the Creator, Whoever your definition is. Tell Him that as His Creation you need His help because alcohol has defeated you. Nex look up any Alcoholics Anonymous number in your phone book and speak to the person on the other side of the line. Otherwise contact any LIfe line number that is listed. The first one do it now whereever you are….now.
You are not alone. I have beeen there and i am still scared of that place i was in. You too can do it
From South Africa
7 Months sober now, after many relapses. I managed 8 years after rehab until someone introduced me to “homeopathic medicine” that contains alcohol. I cannot believe how naive I was, I was convinced that it was the valerian that made me feel good. It became a daily thing, off to the grocery store or the pharmacy to buy these little bottles, until I read the pamflet after two years of shootng the stuff daily. The 200ml bottles contained 84% alcohol by volume. how stupid can one be, I realized that I was simply drinking again, might as well drink Vodka, cheaper and easier!
That was it, I lost control and went back to rehab for one week. There was no way that I could stop on my own, the withrawal symptoms were horrendous, I needed medication to stop me from going crazy.
I now go for a Disulfuam implant every three monhs, it is expensive but it was a means of restoring trust with my wife and kids. But the devil got hold of me, I would “test” the implant after two months with a tiny amount of alcohol, and if there were no adverse effects, I would start drinking again. Naturally, It is impossible to hide, my wife and kids always noticed that I was boozing again. Relapse after relapse, craving after craving. Those dreadful hangovers, they lasted for days, I prayed to God in agony each time.
One thing is fore sure - a relapse is FAR WORSE than quitting the first time. It ruins your enthusiasm, it creates cravings that overpower your will to stay sober. The implants that I receive now are more potent, I can still feel some pills in my butt at the end of the three month period, so I am dead scared of “testing” again.
This article is wonderful, I practise what is advised in this article. It is wonderful to be sober, to be able to speak to my wife and kids and my collegues at work without having to duck and dive, trying to maintain my pose. My wife knows me all too well, you CANNOT hide it. So those of you who managed to stop the first time DO NOT even think of having one drop of alcohol , you will be back on the road to hell again.
I believe that God helped me every time, I thank God for my sobriety and I pray flat-out when I thing of those short-lived “feel good” drinking binges.
Im on day one and hurting real bad anyone have any idea of anything to take to come down
I’m not sure if people will frown on this , but if your not in a detox, you can take a benadryl, it will calm your shakes and help a bit. I’m having hard times myself
Hi everyone! First of all I need to apologize about my english. I’m from Uruguay and like most of us I have serious problems whit alcohol. I’m in the 12 steps program but I’m hopeless about my recovery because my overlaps. I hope this time will diferent… I’m sober since 3 days and my cravings are meke me crazy.
Thanks.
I started posting on this site on and off when I was somewhere around 30 days sober I think. The 19th of November I celebrated 3 years 5 months sober. If it’s alcohol related, I’ve done it all. I’ve been detoxed multiple times, completed a 30 day program in a rehab facility. I spent 30 days there. I drank to get rid of the shakes, to feel better, to feel normal. Just stopped in to tell everyone Happy Thanksgiving. I finally got sober when I started a relationship with my Heavenly Father. The Bible says in Philippians 4:13 I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me. NO WAY I’d be sober without Him today.
AWESOME :)!!
Well, here it is Jan 14, 2015, I have had computer problems, just was able to re-locate this site, however, not many posting, wondering how you are doing, I have had a rough 6 weeks with my daughter and granddaughter moving from California to Oklahoma, some 1800 miles away……..I have fallen a little off of my 6 months wine free, the road got rocky, but I am back on track. wishing you a very Happy Healthy New Year 2015,
Thank you so much for your reply!!! Your words meant a lot to me. I don’t know you, however, you said more words of support than I have received from any of my family, especially my husband-who is starting to show signs of dementia, as he drinks his one/or two glasses of brandy at night making sounds of pleasure when he par-takes! I deal with it, reminding myself he is acting like a child! My Dad was a bartender, my folks owned some type of bar/dinner house….been around alcohol all my life. I have 3 step sons who are recovering alcoholics, 2 have never had a drink since they were 24, they both started drinking at 13, the oldest step son is 53 he didn’t drink for 25 years, divorced. but the last 10 years he is back to drinking heavily, when he stays with us it’s not a fun time! I have a son and daughter who neither one of them have a drinking problem…I am thankful for that! I WILL get through this holiday season, WINE free, Keeping your words, and the words of another person from this site in my mind! I can do this!!! Have a very nice Thanksgiving and Christmas Season! Best Wishes to you……Margaret
Marty: thanks for words of encouragement. Much needed!
All my friends and fellow sufferers from the tyranny of alcohol, every posting here touches me deeply and I feel the pain of all of you. Drink is no longer in charge of me since summer last year, but I know it could be if I take that first drink, and though it really is a daily struggle, the struggle gets a tiny bit less difficult with each day. Don’t give up hope, or stop trying when you stumble. Please get up and try again, and have faith in yourself that you can. May God bless all of you, and lend you His strength. You can do it, and you shall.
Marty, What nice words of encouragement you posted! It is a daily struggle! Congratulations on the time you have been in charge of “YOU”…I have 5 months wine free…, as I have stated in some of my posting, I struggle daily, lately I have been having severe Anxiety attacks, I was hoping or praying that with time this would be easier….I am dreading the Holidays, I just know that the first glass of wine will undue what I have accomplished these last 5 months…I have my moments when parts of me say what the Heck, I am old….then the other parts say if you don’t stop drinking so much wine you will not live long! I agree with your posting about if you stumble, pick yourself back up and get back on track! Keep telling myself I can do this! Have 2 Christmas parties I have been invited to, I am taking a bottle of Martinelli’s apple cider!! Thanks again,for your posting……Best to you….Margaret
You have the strength, Margaret, and my money’s on you winning your Holiday struggle. Keep talking, keep posting, you’re strong-trust in your own strength and determination. More people than you know are cheering for you, and like me, praying for you. Last yesr was my first sober Christmas since 35 years ago, and it was the best one I can remember since I was a kid. I was worried too about the abundance of free-flowing drink, and it turned out to be not a problem at all. I wish the same happy, beautiful and carefree, sober Christmas to you too, Margaret. You deserve it. We all do. God bless you!
Hi, I have come on here today because I need to stop drinking. I have 3 beautiful Young children, and I get hammered three nights a week. The next day I have panic attacks and often call in sick at work. I don’t want to carry on like this and would love to just stop today.
Hi Brenda, Wish I could tell you a simple way to just “STOP” drinking, there isn’t such a thing! I have said it’s wil-power, but from reading on this site about wil-power, they say it’s a matter of how bad do you want to change or be in a different place, it’s how strong is that to you!!!! I struggle daily, I knew if I continued drinking like I have been I will not be alive much longer! You have young children, you need to be there for them….You can do this, set you mine to make the change, possible join a AA group!! My best to You Margaret
Thank you, Marty. You made me want to get up again. Try again. Thank you
Well, it’s the mid of Nov, I was hoping you might be posting…..usually the middle of the month around the 19th you do! I wanted to share with you I am now 5 months, NO WINE….I still pray for strength, and admit to myself that I can’t have that first glass, as I have a PROBLEM….would I drink RAT POSION??, it appears that’s what wine is doing to me….LOL my recent blood work didn’t show the liver as “fatty”
Holidays will be a little more of a struggle, but I can do it!! Hope all is well with you, and your Grandmother….Have a Happy Holidays……I am changing to a new computer, I hope don’t lose this site in the change! Best to You, Margaret,
Margaret, Congratulations on 5 months, that is a miracle ! AWESOME job. And you’re right, you CAN”T have that first glass. Like the saying goes about drinking for alcoholics, 1 is too many and 1000 is never enough. I will pray that God will give you strength during the holidays not to take that first drink. I’m proud of you Margaret.
Thank.U Thank U……I was so glad to see a posting from you.:)..made my Thanksgiving day !…..I was just thinking as I put the turkey in the oven this is the first time I wasn’t having WINE, in a coffee cup, as I prepared for the day!!! I don’t think I had heard that saying about 1 drink too much etc,, I will remember that!
……I can’t express how much I appreciate your words…We have been in touch on this site now for over a year, amazing! I wish others who are struggling could connect with someone as I have you! Hope you are doing well. Happy Holidays to you. God Bless you! Margaret 
Oh my another night of excessive drinking at home alone. Divorced after 33 years. My settlement was a financial shocker-then unemployment has been another challenge and finally a move down the foodchain to a strange new town. I am unanchored and alone and use the wine to ease my sorrows. Have tried hard to accept my lot. I want to stop drinking NOW, but how?
Hi, I wish there were just a simple answer to your question, HOW to stop drinking?, no magic tricks for sure, just pure simple “wil-power”, groups like AA, and believing in yourself that you CAN DO it…I have read many of the writings on this site, I found one story of this persons struggle to stop his additions, I took his advice did a lot of praying, saying to myself that I am the only one who can control me!! I am 70 years old, this struggle isn’t easy at any age, just that I started drinking years ago. just social, however, I started about 4 years ago, drinking to help with pain, realized, that my drinking was controlling me….I don’t drink anything except wine!! I am now 5 months without wine….am feeling better, I fight the urge daily, as my husband isn’t a big supporter, he has his 2 bandy drinks every night, I have my juice, or water…have to remind myself it’s not his problem that I can’t just have a glass or two of wine, have to have a bottle of two!
The Holidays are going to be rough, like Paula mentioned I can have “no lead wine”…which is awful, think I will stick with cranberry juice! Maybe there is a medication your doctor might be able to work with you to help you? You certainly are not alone in this struggle, a lot is mind set, stick to it, ONE DAY at a TIME!! My best to you…You can do it!! Margaret
I have great intentions daily to not drink and if there is no liquor in my house when I get home then I am good. But if there is liquor, it’s going to be had. It feels good going down and I am happy then the next day awaits me and I am depressed and back into daily life stress mode. Single Mom and scared about my future and how I am going to ever survive. I used to have my life all planned out until my cheating ex ruined all my dreams of our future. Being alone sucks and I will never trust another man again. I can’t risk my heart broken. But, as for now how do I calm my monkey mind and stop drinking? I do journaling but I need something to get in my head to keep me away from alcohol and I need to take the first step to exercising again. I work and hide from life for the lost part. I used to do an online womans group for AA called GROW. haven’t been involved with that in some time. I am just going though the days emotions.
Hi there, I’ve a very severe drink problem, I drink 2-3 bottles 7 days a week and when I actually manage to go without even for 1 night I have terrifying nightmares. My bodies a total mess and I feel like I’m going to black out all the time.. My life is in bits and I can do so little on a day to day basis. I’m totally broke and have lost all my friends. I’ve looked today at Rehab places but they are just shockingly expensive I could never afford to go to 1. I’ve tried therapists and told my doctor, had blood tests done but he didn’t have the interest to do them properly. I’m scared and don’t know what to do. I need help badly so would appreciate your advice. Thank you for reading this and | genuinely want to stop. Hope all of you are having a good day.
Take care and all the best.
feel for you in the same situation x
I would gently suggest you removed the picture of a bottle of wine…it started me craving.
That’s the idea Paula, because you need to learn how to deal with them - alcohol is unavoidable in most cultures.
Hi, Thank you for your email. Please tell me more about you and together we can support each other. like AA when you feel comfortable we can do it together but I promise and you must do the same we’re honest and it’s totally whatever we talk about stays between us. I thought about you today and didn’t drink although I sooooo badly wanted to. My life and body is a total mess but the thought of you going though the same as me….I’ll have a bad night tonight because I didn’t have a drink but I hope you have someone to support you. It’s going to be mega difficult but for some reason I think we’ll get though the tough times if we stick together especially over Christmas. Hope to hear back from you and you’re ok.
Rita
Hi, Rita! I know the feeling. All you have to do is go to a hospital and let them know you need alcohol detox. I checked myself in on New Year’s Eve. I spent a week in the ward. I am 27 years old. I got out and wanted a drink so bad when I got home. My doctor prescribed me Naltraxone. It is a pill you take once a day that blocks the alcohol craving. The first couple of days are really hard, then it starts to kick in. I was drinking a magnum of vodka everyday for over 4 years. When I went in, my blood alcohol level was 4.54. To be legally drunk in NY it’s 0.08. Go to a hospital, tell them your needs and they cannot deny you based on finances. It’s not fun, it’s not a playground. You can get better. If I did, anybody can. Even though I’m young I know what it’s like. Thankfully my bosses at work, parents and friends are supportive. GO TO THE HOSPITAL! I almost died from giving up cold turkey.
So glad I found this site. has anyone used the anti-craving drugs? Do they work ? How can you get a confidential prescription? Thnx
Hello, As for your question about taking any “anti-drinking” medication or how to get a rx, I myself have not taken any herbs, or doc rx, I have been trying to do some Juicing to try and detox the liver, I have read on a couple of pages that Kuduz, (sp) from a health store I think, might curb the desire! Since I take so much medicine for other health problems I haven’t tried any herbs, I think another gal recent to the site is trying herbs. I did find a tea that says it helps detox the liver! Hope this is helpful, amazing how the body does have a way of over taking with the cravings…..I am finding that any type of sugar I put in my body even a “diet soda” turns the cravings on! I was just switching WINE for sweets,! Trying really hard to not eat sweets either……My doc said the cravings hang on, just take one day at a time! Best to you, Margaret
Hi, I’m nearly 40 years old and mum to 3 kids.I’m really struggling to give up drinking .I have the best of intentions and then go to dinner or a party and have one glass of wine to relax then before I know it I’ve drunk about 7 or 8. I feel like a failure and am scared that it’s out of my control. I am always around drinkers and the temptations are really strong. I have social anxiety and drinking has been my way of coping with that. I am in a pattern now of drinking to excess every second night. The next day I vow to quit then a day later I’m back on it. Any advice??
Hi Julia……I can so relate to your “struggle”, I am 70, have been drinking only WINE for 30 plus years, never has it been something that I didn’t have control over until about 5 years ago, then I began drinking as much as 2 bottles, sometimes 3 a night…..OH MY, I was using it for pain control after having a couple of surgeries.. not an excuse, but that’s what happened….I have tried a couple of times to QUIT, it certainly isn’t easy! I have now been 4 months, 4 days, WINE FREE, I fight it everyday, I have to talk to myself constantly about not taking that first glass, as I can’t have just ONE glass…..I do say a daily prayer to give me strength! My liver is showing some fatty signs…So, for my health reason I have to quit! When going to any parties or special occasion it makes not having wine with others very difficult, to a point I almost don’t want to attend…I also am around “drinkers”…my husband has a glass or two every night of Brandy, he is able to stop with that…unlike me, he isn’t very supportive which makes me so dang MAD, but it isn’t his problem that I can’t stop at one glass, but does he have to make a big deal out of “cocktail time”! ugh. My step son who stays with us on and off for a few weeks or months, he is a “Alcoholic” drinks every night till he falls asleep, that too is difficult for me, when he is here! I wish I could give you an answer that could solve the struggle, there is none, except not taking that first drink, believe in yourself that you can do it, say a prayer! Wishing you the best, just know that others and myself understand the struggle you are going through…You can do it!! Margaret
Hi. If you’ve been a controlled drinker and you suddenly find yourself wondering how your intention to drink a glass of wine turned into a bottle, this post is for you.
I was drinking at the end of an anxious, yet boring day, seven days a week. But no more.
If one is anxious, it has thw effect of overloading one’s body with cortisol. This has the dual effect of keeping you in primitive response ie fight or flight, while at the same time shutting down the rational, thinking, decision making part of your brain.
So you have a glass of wine, which offers a dopamine effect, instantly relaxing you. Unfortunately it also further shuts down the rational part of your brain which says “one glass is enough.” Because you’ve already been depressing the frontal cortex all day due to anxiety, one glass of wine pushes you to the point of zero thinking ability. The next thing you know, you’re cracking bottle number two on a work night at midnight.
I found this knowledge to be empowering. I hope it helps others to get off the binge and maybe one day back to social drinking.
If you’re an alcoholic this will not help. If you’ve revently developed a dependency that you never had in the past it may help.
Hi Dean, for some reason this site seemed to post something I sent to you on the 19th, as tho you had written it!?….Hope you are able to find the note….Hoping all is well with you, looking back at posting, it looks like I first started visiting this site in May of 2013, I mentioned it had cravings for sweets since not drinking wine, your suggestion was fruit juice, that has helped….it has taken me a while to get on the right track, from 2013 haha, Hopefully, I am now! Facing a few “challenges” the next few weekends with Anniversary Parties, 2 Birthday parties, and a Granddaughter’s Wedding, all I will be attending……plus the holidays…..I can do it! BLess You, Margaret
You could bring a bottle of non-alcoholic wine to parties
Here it is Oct 19…time to get in touch :), hope you are doing well, I hit 3 months Friday with no wine! When the “urge” hits me to break down, your words and struggle you have been through, along with some of the sayings you have shared from the bible… come to my thoughts!!………Your story of your struggles was very impressive to me, as well as caring for your Grandmother..Thank you for sharing! I still have problems when my husband mentions that’s it cocktail time, when he is having his drink(s)…..I have come to terms, it’s my “PROBLEM” not his that I can’t just have a glass of wine, he is able to have one drink, sometimes 2 and that’s it. I actually am feeling better, sleep better, don’t have the “bloated” look as bad!
My recent blood test did show better reading of my “fatty liver”.. Wishing you well thoughts…God Bless……..Margaret
Hi everyone, I am struggling like mad, keep trying different herbs, I feel rubbish in the morning. I pray for us all. My Father died two years ago 25th Oct, he was 74 and a long term alcoholic. I am from a small family, but only my Dad did and I have issues with alcohol. I know I should learn by this, but is so very hard. I also want to say to Meri you are not alone, I care and I know other people will too. Take care all. Dee
Good luck to you, it is a daily struggle to fight the urge to have a drink, just take it one day at a time, maybe find someone on this site that you can relate to, I have, and it seems to help, Dean Moore has an amazing story! I can actually say my overall health I feel much better, not drinking the WINE>.. I am much older than almost everyone on this site, so have had longer to abuse myself, I fight the urge each day, especially at social events……..I just say a little prayer to myself ” one of which is I CAN DO IT, please let me be strong! Keep focused! My best to you, Margaret
Hi Margaret, thank you for your words. I hope you are well, I pray a lot for strength and I hope we can all beat this illness. You are doing really well, I will keep trying and trying. I am using herbs at the moment, but still drinking. Regards Dee.
Hi everyone,
I recently quit binge drinking and smoking. I have done very hard drugs in the past and I find it particularly very challenging to stay away from alcohol.
I’m doing fairly well for my age I have a stable job, my own place, and car.
However I’m very stressed I recently got foot surgery and have a month off work because of it.
My family has been going through a lot financially and emotionally and I cant help much. I also feel useless and worthless because I cant walk or go anywhere. My family lives hundreds of miles away so sometimes I forget somebody out there cares about me. I don’t vent to them because I try to be the strong one in the family. I’m always the shoulder everyone cries on.
I recently got married. I’m so in love with husband. I would do anything for him if it ever came down to it. I’m even trying to do everything possible to get him out of financial trouble, everything from going to debt for him to selling his car for him. I’ve completely changed my habits, style, and friends to make him happy. I wake up and the only thing I look forward to all day is seeing my husband asking him about his day and giving him a kiss. However, he usually comes home pissed off from work and not excited to see me. He would rather do anything than spend time with me. The time we do have to spend together after work, he rather spend going to the pool or doing research on his future he says. If not he’ll do homework for school for 5 hrs or more and stays up all night. When he “stays up all night doing productive stuff” its usually because he’s watching porn I’ve cought him so many times.
I’m at a point where I don’t even know why he gets mad at me anymore he makes me feel worthless (has called me a worthless drunk) ugly and doesn’t care about my feelings even when I cry which is rare he says my tears are fake. Can you blame me for wanting attention love and intimacy from my husband?
I’m starting to think he was the one of the worst mistakes I’ve ever made!
I just want to drink to numb my feelings away and not care about him like he doesn’t care about me and be happy. I know Im not even close to one of his priorities and being in his future and it upsets me so much.
I just want to turn to drinking again, when I drink I feel like I’m on top of the world. I’m always the life of the party when I would drink. I was happier and practically had a lot of men eating out of my hands and kissing the ground I stepped on. Clubs, body shots, parties and out drinking everyone I was crazy and wild but happy when drinking. Its so hard to not be tempted to go back to that.
Alcohol made me feel confident and pretty. I feel like no one is here for me or cares about my life but my dogs. I’ve never felt so worthless and lonely but I don’t want to show it or tell anyone how I feel I]m supposed to be the strong one. I feel like alcohol solves my problems temporary and I need that break so bad! Help I need advise
Hi Meri, I am from a small family. I lost my only brother when I was 18yrs old to suicide. My 3 sisters never really bothered much, I am the baby of the family, at 42yrs and a severe alcoholic. Like you I am always a shoulder for people to listen to. I have always been there for family, friends, but most of all my parents. My Dad died aged 74 two yrs ago this month, he was a long term alcoholic. Only he and I had and have alcohol issues. When my Dad died, my sisters turned on me because I said they were not there when Mum and Dad really needed them. I hit a nerve, my Dad saved just enough for his funeral, so no dispute there, I find it hard to forget how nasty my two sisters were, my eldest sister who I never see was fine. I have tried support groups, counselling, AA, now trying herbs. I just want you to that I care and will keep you in my thoughts. Please do not let your husband run you down. You yourself has to think, I am worth who I am and you will find real genuine people when you least expect. I have a handful of friends in the UK, and they are great. Thinking of you Dee
Hi Meri, are you ok? Take care Dee.
Hi everyone. I started reading all your comments a few days ago. I have had a real struggle with alcohol for a number of years. I have a son and a husband who are worried about the amounts i drink on occassion. My son is 12. I also worry about my drinking . I have tried to cut down but its not really working. It works i start feeling proud of myself then my drinking increases again. Im sick of the hangovers and feeling like crap the next morning, im sick of the fear that one day i will die because of my drinking, im terrified of leaving my son and knowing how sad it would make him if i were to die. I want to get better i want to be free of my drinking,but i dont know if i ever will be. All i can do is never give up trying. Please pray for me that one day i will get a miracle.
Sept 20th, I was just checking to see if you had posted anything on the 19th, your usual posting date! I no longer can see the posting that I had sent to you last month about my posting being under your name, I guess that’ because most of my postings are directed to you! Hope things continue to go well with you! I am now 9 weeks with no wine, a record for me! I think of you when I have “struggling” times, how well you have done! My husband isn’t very supportive, he manages to have his 2 drinks before dinner, which is fine, if only he would not keep saying “it’s cocktail time” and saying how good his drink is….very hard sometimes on me,,,,,,,,,,,,but, he is 80 I think going “backwards” very childish acting! I seriously hope everyone on this site that are struggling with the battle of not drinking are able to find someone or something that helps them! I never went on binges, or things like that, only drank wine, 2 bottles a night was too much!!!! I just know that I feel better, which is what my doctor was hoping for, my Liver was “being effected” by the wine, so if for no other reason taking care of the body is very important. at 70 it’s hard to repair the damage done! Blessing be with you….Margaret
Hey Margaret, You post is still under my name
That’s OK. I am still sober. 3 years and 3 months this past Sept. 19. You haven’t had a drink in 9 weeks ? That is AWESOME. If I can quit drinking, anybody can. Margaret, I’ll be praying for you, I hope you don’t mind. And have you gave Jesus a try ? It says in Gods Word (The Holy Bible) That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. Romans 10:9 Confess that scripture Margaret, repent of your sin,and ask Jesus into your heart as your savior. It’s that simple 
And thank you for the kind words and support you’ve shown me Margaret. I appreciate it soo much. I’ll check back on here in the near future.
Hi Dean……thank you for your scripts readings, I will keep those in mind! I am still on track with no Wine, been under some heavy stress lately, managing to stay strong! My daughter who is 50 (she is single) owns a fishing resort/café about 2 hours from me, has a bout with major shin splints, has been put on bed rest, for 6 weeks…….I am trying to help out, lots of “drinkers” live there year around..! they sure repeat themselves a lot! LOL,,, Wow, congratulations on your time “sober”! Bless you! Margaret
Hello everyone, I have been drinking a long time, I have spoken to a few people on line. I am 42yrs old. At present I am trying some herbal treatments, not sure how long they take to have any affect! I am thinking of you all and pray for strength for us all. Kind regards. Dee
Hi everyone! I’m Jessica ….I found this site by accident. I was having a craving and trying to learn how to deal with it.
JESSICA I just read ur reply about your father. My dad also was a alcoholic and drug user and he tried hard to rid of his habits. He eventually passed away at 49yrs old recently. I know how much it hurts to think that they don’t care because if they did they would completely stop!! But like yourself I finally realize its a sickness…
I’m so happy your dad is trying to cut down with his drinking. I hope eventually he can completely rid of it.
I myself got on depression pills after my dad died. My drinking went out of control as well as me experimenting with cocaine. I got alcohol poisoning twice I was taken to the hospital. I didn’t care nor listen to the drs. I continued to drink. I binge drink. I contemplated suicide as well. I did feel all alone. I embarrassed myself and hurt people I loved and cared about. So I thank you for the post. I felt exactly as you said alone and nobody cares.
I do realize I drink when bad things happen stressing situations. I see that recently about myself. I only been completely sober for a short amount of time but already I feel and look so much better inside and out. Alcohol and drug addiction is a huge problem in both sides of my family. Losing many family to both young and old. Its sad.
I think of my dad at times and think how I don’t want my life to be cut short over stupid decisions that eventually kills you in the end.
He will not be here for my wedding, kids, and life in general and it makes me so sad and angry at him. But life goes on no matter how much I miss him. We were very close. He was so young to die!!
To anyone out there sick with this disease know we love you still no matter what.. I love and loved my daddy no matter what decisions he continued to make.
God bless you all and have a blessed day! I find content reading all of your life experiences and positive words!!!! Thank you!!!
hey Jessica I read ur post and my dad is in his 50s and he is stil drinking everyday and hes getting more ill as I speak I ended up social aswell due to my drinking and now I wanna stop drinking for my kids its scary and not im starting to forget things I don’t no if its due to the drinking or what not I just want it to go away I was on medication for my suicidal thoughts and they didn’t help me at all I ended up drinking ontop off them to clear my mind and ometimes I would drink and walk about not knowingwhere I am going its crazy I rewally want help to stop drinking
thank you. im 48, been drinking for longer than i can remember!!! .
to read your bible was a help, still jes… how do i stop !!
Hi Dean, Oh, I didn’t take your remark as being rude at all, or a smart alec……I guess since I mostly talk to you, this site must have made us like FaceBook friends…which if fine with me!! I replied to you earlier, but not sure where that was posted or if this might be a doubt reply!! Your story impressed me from the first day I read it, I guess have told you that before! Again no offense was taken by your remark! Have a blessed birthday….Margaret
Dean, I did not take your remark as being rude, or a smart alec at all……..since I really only chat with you, I guess this site has made us “FB” type of friends :), which is fine with me………Your story so impressed me as I have said before! No offense was taken at all!! Have a very blessed birthday! Margaret
Posted on my facebook page yesterday. Dad told me that Darian was really proud of me getting sober and staying sober. Most of you know I moved in with my grandma about a month and a half of my sobriety date. She has alzheimers disease, and I took care of her 24/7 for 2 years and 8 months. She is in longterm care at Richfield nursing facility now. I had days that would drive a normal person to drink. I went through multiple stints in detox between 2000 and 2011. I lived in a rehab facility for 30 days and completed a 30 day program during that span of time. I’ve been in after care a couple times, committed myself to the hospital on occasion because of my alcoholism. Darian knew what I came out of and I think he was really surprised that I stayed sober for the period of time that I did. I reached the point that one day sober was a miracle for me. When I first got sober, the first 13 months I tried to read atleast an entire book of the New Testament in the Bible everyday. Somedays I read more, some days less. I began to pray daily and develop a relationship with God and His only Son Jesus. Somewhere along the line, He took the desire for alcohol (and even drugs) away from me. Darian passed away this past Feb. unexpectedly. We were identical twins, 18 minutes apart. He was born first. Through it all, no matter what, I’ve yet to pick up a drink or even get high. Still today, the first prayer I say everyday, I thank my Heavenly Father for another day sober, for giving me the strength, desire and wisdom to stay sober, and for taking the desire for alcohol and drugs away from me in Jesus name. I’ve not had as much as one sip of alcohol, nor have I smoked any pot or done any drugs in this time. I’ll celebrate my first birthday this weekend without being a twin in this world. This post is for you Darian. I made it another month. I am 3 years 2 months sober. Happy Birthday bud
Dean, August 19th, just checked to see if you had posted today!! I now have 4 weeks behind me without drinking any wine! I don’t drink anything other than wine! at 70 it’s hard to change your ways! I think it’s wonderful to see so many younger ones trying to change their ways! I am sure your story has or will help many! Hope things continue to go well for you! God bless, Margaret
Margaret, congratulations. Your post is under my name
did you notice that ?
Dean, yes I did notice that my reply was under your name! I am so sorry to hear of your twin brother passing away, that is a tough one. My daughter had a very dear friend pass away a few months ago also a Twin, occasions are very difficult for him since he and his brother did so much together. You have been faced with lots of situations that could have weakened you, faith and strength be with you! Have a nice birthday, just know that your Brother is watching over you and celebrating from above! Have lots of ice cream and cake….Best Wishes, Margaret
Magaret, I wasn’t trying to be a smart alec when I was saying your comment was under my name, I was just asking if you knew it. It doesn’t bother me. Just want to let you know I wasn’t trying to be rude
CCC,
You are not alone in your struggle. My dad also drinks 6 beers or more a night & struggles with depression. I am always worried that he might try to hurt himself, but similar to you I think he has had suicidal thoughts but is scared to follow through. I encourage him to quit drinking but I know it is extremely difficult. However alcohol is a downer & it will make you feel worse about yourself. If you already battle with depression alcohol enhances that feeling of being alone, of no one caring, & that you are a disappointment. But I guarentee you that someone out there does care about you & that you have not disappointed them as much as you think you have. & I also know that those people you think would get over your death in a month’s time, won’t. When I think of the state of depression my dad battles with when he drinks it makes me sad because I know that he loves me but it’s like the alcohol prevents him from realizing how much he means to me. He is not a burden to me, but a blessing! & I know he wishes he could quit drinking cold turkey, but he has taken great strides to cut the amount of beers he drinks each night in half. & that makes me proud! I know quitting can’t happen overnight, it is a process & it took me a long time to understand that. But by cutting back 1 beer every couple weeks, it tells me he is trying & that I am worth him trying to quit so that he can prolong the amount of time he can spend on this earth with me! So I write this to encourage you. If you think no one cares about you, I am a complete stranger & I care, so how much more do you think your own family members or those closest to you must care. You are not a coward for not wanting to commit suicide, it just shows that you have things you still want to live for. I think those people & things that prevent you from wanting to die can also be your inspiration for wanting to quit or cut back on drinking. Whether you want to develop a better relationship with your spouse, you want to be around to watch your grandkids grow up…whatever it is that you care about (& you will know what you care most about because it is the things you feel most guilty about when you drink), use that as your motivation! I hope it helps to know someone who doesn’t even know you cares & am glad that you were brave enough to admit how you felt on here. Keep progressing…even baby steps are forward motion! I am praying for you!
Amazing words