Trying to stop drinking is stressful
Struggling with addiction is stressful - when you’re trying to stop drinking you can end up in a cycle of battling with cravings and guilt, having to remember all those things that you’re supposed to be doing differently.
It can be exhausting, so much so that it creates its own cravings. But stress is all about your perceptions of your abilities - if you tell yourself that “I can’t do this”, then of course you’ll feel stressed about it.
If you tell yourself that, “yes this is difficult, but I think I can do it”, then you’ll feel more confident. It’s simple really, you just need to get into the habit of saying positive things like that to yourself, eventually you’ll believe them.
What you’re trying to do right now is very difficult, so recognise that you need to off-load to people, to talk it through, to schedule in some relaxation time, some treats for yourself. If you’ve got a family to think about too then this can be hard to justify: “I’ve been such a strain on them already, how can I ask them to sacrifice even more?”, or “How can I take time away from my children when I’ve already been neglecting them because of my drinking?”
The point is, you need some time to relax if you’re trying to stop drinking, because it’s an incredibly draining task. Acknowledge that, be honest about it. You can’t be strong all the time!
I know how you feel davon. I relapsed and overdid it last night and am annoyed with myself for not being able to control it. I wanted to just have 1 glass (3 units) of wine and one tia maria at a party but I think I had two bottles and no idea how much baileys, tia maria…
Thank you rhonda for posting that helped me. I’ve just been reading the pages on here about seeing it as slip and that has helped as well. I’m trying to work out strategies to try to help me resist when I feel I need a drink. I wasnt to try to imagine my liver and my brain. I want to remember 3 is the magic number because I’ve not to go over that. The problem is that in the moment when I feel the craving I do not remember all these good intentions.
It was great to find this website.
I know what you are going through. After my mother died, I started drinking more, to alleviate stress, out of boredom and it seemed to be the only way I could feel at ease.
That was 3 years ago and now 30 pounds later gained, I am trying to lose this extra weight. If I have family around me all the time, I don’t get bored and then I don’t drink. My body craves it, and I can get short tempered, impatient and easily irritated. If I don’t drink for more than 5 days, this goes away. Also the scale starts to go down. I use being fat as an excuse to not go anywhere, then I stay home, surf the web, IM friends and drink. Alone or with friends, it doesn’t matter. I can drink up to a 12 pack on some nights or 2 bottles of wine. Usually it is 4 to 7 beers or 1 bottle of wine when I drink. This can be 3 or 4 times a week, usually 4 beers or a 3/4 bottle of wine. On the heavier side, that can sometimes be about every three weeks.
Today I made the decision that I want this extra weight off to feel better, and it will only happen if I go cold turkey with drinking and get my body back to the point of being buzzed with two beers. And most drinking doesn’t go over 5 or 6, when I am at an all night function. If I stay away from it for one month I know this will happen.
I hope this helps. I stay focused and I also look for help online.
hi, have read some of your articals on your website and can relate to quite alot of them , im only writing this beacause ive been staring at the monitor for ages feeling guilty,because ive given in to the drink again tonight,so i thort id put “i cant stop drinking” in the search bar? and here we are.. the bottom line is i know i have a problem but find it really hard to not have a bottle of wine in the evening, but can go without for 1 nite, maby 2, if im not stressed after a hard days work, witch i seem to be more often than not,my partner (of 10 yrs)also drinks,but not as much as me in a evening but when i do she does and viceversa,anyway its all getting hard to cope with so what do u think,thanks.dav 34