Binge drinking is alcoholism too
Many people looking for help on this site do not consider themselves to be alcoholics. They are not drinking all day, every day. But they are regularly binge drinking alcohol to excess, such that they are damaging their health, their relationships and their self esteem.
It is easier to convince yourself that you haven’t got an alcohol problem if you can regularly have days where you don’t drink at all. You think you’ve got control of your drinking again, so you’re not so concerned any more.
Then it happens again – you binge, and wake up feeling awful. Maybe you carry on drinking heavily for a couple of days to deal with how guilty you feel about it all. But this type of binge drinking can have serious negative consequences which you need to do something about.
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Dear all,
I found this website as I have been worried about my partner who binge drinks on social occasions. He looses his memory + seems to forget about being in a partnership when he has those ”glazed” eyes. Quite upsetting to me, but nothing compared to some of the stories i have read on this site. I would like to send you all some much needed strength & encouragement. This life is very painful at times & can seem somewhat overwhelming & challenging – why do we go through the things we do ? Why is there so many people out there who seem to cause so much pain & hurt?- I dont know, all I do know is thats its our own actions and responses to situations that counts. I know it seems too easy to grab a bottle or hit the town and ”let loose” let the life troubles slip away with every sip- but in my experience (and It seems the same to those who have written on this site) the night (or day!) that we do this only seems to bring more troubles, more sorrow, more depression etc. I hope that if only you can start to see the consequences to hitting the bottle, perhaps we hurt loved ones- perhaps we loose memory & do things we would not normally do, think about that next day when you take that first sip- start living for a bright future, rather than getting swept away in the moment. Meditation has greatly helped me in my life when I experienced deep sadness through a parental divorce- try this ? Meditation not only helps with clearing our minds & relaxation- it helps start to control that complexed mind of ours- it is the tool that allows us to control those negative thoughts- thus our actions also. Its really hard in the beginning, but if you have the STRENGTH to persevere I assure you, you will see results. I suggest going to classes rather than CD’s. Please everyone, if you want to be healthy happy people you HAVE to start living that way NOW, without regret- stop thinking of the past, stop being victims, be brave, be kind & love unconditionally- yes people have hurt you, yes people will always try and (most of the time unknowingly) hurt you- but rise above it, in your own life love yourself & be happy in your own company- without drinking, without doing things distractive to yourself & others- learn to be content just to be still, always know in your mind that your in this life to benefit not only yourself- but your also responsible for the happiness of others around you.
If you have a will – you will find a way. Much love
Ok reasons to stop drinking… I have just come out of Rehab, a well known one. Age ranges 22-60 in last year they have had 2 deaths from alcohol. 30% in my opinion had had seizures and a lot of people knew of those who had alcohol induced dementia. (Korsokof or something).
Basically you die/ choke on vomit/cirrosis/ seizures or end up a vegetable. All of which you probably wont realise till its too late. One drink is too many and a thousand is never enough.
I have seen it first hand. One lad who had had treatnment and died was only 22. He just thought he could do it himself and did not want to abstain although talked the talk (yeah never again etc etc) Now hes buried.
Enough said… Alcohol is a Class A drug and pointless.
i don’t know where to start… my boyfriend is a binge drinker,he works as a fireman so is on shift work.From what i’ve been told by his family he’s drank since the age of about 13/14 he is now 30.. i used to be a heavy drinker i’d had a real bad life then wen i was single for a while i really let my hair down, so when he met me i was always out partyin n drinkin. i hav now moved away from where i lived n now moved in with him in Cumbernauld since a year. i hav medical issues so i’m on morphine so i’ve hardly ever had even a glass of wine so that was a blessing in disciase my mum n dad wear so worried about me movin but now they are so proud with the drink issue.. i hav depression n he doesn’t help with the drinkin but when ever i try to say anythin i’m always the bad one.. he hates me shouting back so now i won’t argue then he hates that now no matter what i do is not right he is goin for a liver scan i am so so worried n he seams to think it’s anythin he is makin me so ill but i can’t leave him as i love him so much but i wish i cud just pour the drink down the drain he won’t say he has a prob i am really at the end now n have no where to turn …
HELP WHAT CAN I DO!!!!
Thank you all for your insights. I’ve had this sinking feeling for a while that I’ve got a problem…..the problem is that its only every couple of months that my “cut off switch” doesn’t work. By that time I’ve forgotten how bad I felt the last time it happened.
After reading this I’ve finally though enough is enough. I don’t want to be like this anymore and I’ve come to the realisation that I can’t even have 1 drink because I never know when the “cut off switch” isn’t going to work.
I’ve tied a ribbon around my wrist just to remind me in case I forget how horrible I felt after last Saturday night. I don’t want to feel like that again.
Its really difficult being a binge drinker and feeling like you are the only one in the world who has succumbed to it but when one reads the threads on this page it is undeniable that so many people on this planet are experiencing the same thing.
Why is it that some folks get caught in this trap of repeating the binging and having no limits?
One of the biggest difficulties I have ever had admitting to being a binge drinker problem drinker is why the hell is this happening to me?did I program myself at some point?or is it down to genes?my parents are as good as teetotal…how can it be that no apparent solution to this exists?
I think at the end of the day alcohol has just got to be put up with crack cocaine and smack because as far as drugs go surely the alcohol is the mother of them all
I could offer some explanation for binge drinking and I can only compare to my own experiences and therefore this is just a theory.
At the age of 16 I enjoyed my new found freedom of leaving school and loved nothing more than going out on the weekends and getting mashed up,I think this activity brought on an addiction which must exist for binge drinking to follow.I have come to form this conclusion because I can quite easily not smoke for days or weeks on end but the moment I do have a smoke I find myself really wanting another 20 minutes later and exactly the same thing happens with alcohol so clearly there is evidence here to suggest an actual physical addiction.
Obviously a lot of danger exists in over indulgence and I wonder now whether this may be the roots of binge drinking
Joy / Kingpin / Miles – This behavior is all too familiar. Although I can abstain from drinking with no problem, every now and again I just lose the plot and can’t seem to stop myself from chasing the high of those first few drinks. The more I drink the more I want to drink and the thirst for alcohol just increases and that short lived moment when I am felling on top of the world passes quickly and I turn into a nightmare. I say and do whatever I feel like and the more I have guzzled the further away from reality I get. I had a real wake up call this weekend after waking up with my hand covered in blood after putting my hand through a car window because I was frustrated that family stopped me from drinking more and brother had to physically restrain me and the police were nearly called as I was increasingly becoming out of control. Luckily for me, no harm was caused other than a few cuts to my hand and some serious apologies were to be made in the morning for my actions. I started off the night with good intentions to control my drinking but my stop point didn’t kick in once again. I would like to think I could stick .to three drinks a night but once I have finished that third drink I always want ‘just one more drink’. I think it’s time I admit I have a problem and knock it on the head altogether before I do myself and others around me serious harm.
Levi
The writing is on the wall
I think its time to admit I have a problem… the addiction gene was passed to me!
I am a binge drinker, like many of you the cut off switch won’t engage. I have been drinking since age 13 and now at 22 the bar scene is hard to resist. Im wondering if anyone else experiences the urge to be alone once they are “gone”
When I have been drinkin to the point of black out I always run away from the group I am with. I try to hide from them, I seclude myself and just want to be alone. It used to only happen every so often, but lately it has been every time I drink. After these crazy episodes I always tell myself I won’t drink again and then the weekend role around and the cycle repeats. I want to change, any advice?
yes,i often find myself doing a dissapearing act..it is worrying for whomever you are with but i think it may be some aware part of your/my brain telling us that we are not fit to be seen in that state by anyone and we should get out of that social situation as fast as possible..it is dangerous though as wandering around alone trying to get home puts us in a very vulnerable situation..at least if we are with others they cld keep an eye out for us,but i think the shame in our brain wants us to hide..i have filmed myself when totally drunk and it is soooooooooo ugly..
I have also been filmed completely out of it, not pretty at all.. do you have any advice on how to keep myself around others to avoid the disappearing act? How have you dealt with it? I have put myself in some pretty dangerous situations and caused a lot of worry and heartbreak to friends and others I care about. I truly do believe it is some conscious state in me that knows I am to far gone and thus try to escape but want to find a better way to deal. Thanks for your help and also for letting me know I am not alone
Well hello all. Believe it or not I actually read all of the posts before mine. Let me first say that I am glad I am not alone. At the same time, however, I am troubled by the fact that so many people suffer from the same problem.
I have been a binge drinker since high school. I remember stealing from my parents liquor cabinet (squeeze bottle cocktail). Once able to, we had of age friends buy booze for us. Eventually I turned 19 and was fully capable of ruining my life on my own. I hit the bars hard, always binge drinking. There were periods where the drinking was frequent but most often it was sporadic.
I’ve had numerous incindents in which I made a complete ass of myself or made a complete mess of my house or friends house. I was a regular impaired driver and have collected TWO impaired driving convictions.
The most recent conviction was less than a year ago. I am serving a 3 year license suspension and will most likely not be able to afford insurance when I do get my license back. I went to jail for the last impaired charge. I had hit rock bottom, or so I had thought.
After I got out of jail I was to refrain from drinking, which wasn’t a problem. Then my fiancee and I went on a trip to Cuba where she approved me to have a few drinks. Well didn’t I go to the disco one night alone and get completely wasted. To make a long story short I almost lost the love of my life. So we returned home and I continued to abstain from alcohol. I went months without having a drink. Again we decided maybe I should try to drink again. What we believed was that we knew my problem wasn’t drinking all day everyday, the problem was not knowing when to stop. So I gave myself a STRICT 3 drink limit. I was able to hold that promise for some time. Then inevitably, I started to slip again. I’d bend the rules and have four or five, which didn’t prove to be a problem. However, it did open the door for me to fall off the wagon again.
Which brings me to my latest incident. I had been having problems at work with some of my staff. It was proving to be quite stressful. I was dealing with it in positive ways (working out, video games etc)Now, I didn’t resort to alcohol right away. The day of Halloween night I had an employee blow up at me and that got the ball rolling. I left work, went home to get ready to go out. We got all done up in our costumes (I was a drag queen) having a great time. We headed out to the function we were going to. Somehow, I had too much to drink, I just kept going and going and never thought twice about it. So I made a big scene when we left, I fell flat on my face in the middle of the road, almost got in a fight, was totally rude to the cabbie. THEN (this is where it gets real horrible) I went into work… in drag.
I don’t remember what happened but I went in and one guy made comments about my attire and it set me off. Word were said, I beat up some equipment, and wrote up my letter of resignation, well half of it.
The next day when I woke up I puked every hour on the hour from 8am til 3pm. I then went into work where I was informed of what I had done and given a 1 week suspension.
Not only did I almost lose my job, but this time I seriously almost lost my fiancee. I honestly believe that if we weren’t attatched by our house, I’d be alone.
So, needless to say, I am an alcoholic. I’ve been in denial for years, thinking I’m just a “binge drinker” and just need to learn to control it. Its been out of control for almost 10 years now. I hope this last incident was truly the bottom of all rock bottoms because if it ever happens again I definately will be alone.
I’m tired of hurting my fiancee, my friends, my co-workers and everyone I care about, and random strangers who I also affect.
My decision is to finally cut alcohol out of my life completely. I seem to be incapable of controlling it as it takes control over me. I find it easy to refrain from alcohol completely, but as soon as I let it back in, it just takes over. I really hope I am able to do it this time and to make sure it happens I am going back to counselling and getting the support I need. I hope everyone else can make that decision as well.
Thanks for reading,
Jason
Hello my name is Tinkerbell and I am a professional binge drinker. Well there we have it. Took me years to realise this and last night my best friend and I where chatting and she asked me if I thought I was an alcoholic. Well NO I said, I might have been drinking heavily on occasions but I am surely not an alcoholic. Then I returned the question to her and asked her what her opinion was, and she said (to my horror) that she’s not sure if I am an alcoholic but she’s sure there’s a problem. Well needless to say that I was awake most of last night thinking this over and still thinking this morning. I started drinking a lot when I was about 22, now 33, and I am horrified that I can relate to most of the stories I have read on this site. I have not been convicted of driving under the influence, but think that’s just by being lucky, I have not crashed my car, but have almost done so on a few occasions when driving over a sidewalk and once I blacked out while driving and woke up just in time to swerve out avoiding a lamp post. This is seriously scary and every time I feel so extremely bad the next day and then overcome that bad feeling by not dealing with it and trying to forget (and succeeding at it). I would do almost anything just so that I dont feel so bad anymore, beg, cry, promise I will never do it again etc. Now it has come so far that my boyfriend of 2 years being so concerned and telling me that every time I do binge drinking, I kill a little part of his love for me. I was always upset with him because he does not respect me, he does not give me compliments, he’s not proud of me and the list goes on, but what have I been doing to receive his trust, respect and compliments? I was always looking for the fault to be on his side (or someone else) and now realize that I have been harming and destroying my own life for a very long time, as a result, I dont have much of an self esteem left which causes many problems on its own, my reputation has been damaged (hopefully not to the point of no return), I am hurting my boyfriend so badly and feel even worst for that. I cover up my bad doings by doing charity work and helping others and being a good friend so that I can feel better about myself. I have been surrounded all my live by people who binge drink and saw it as just partying, and my previous boyfriends also binge drinked so there was never a problem and we would both laugh the next day about our hangovers, but now I can see it’s a problem as it’s affecting my whole life and I have done so much damage to my life. I have always had the feeling that something was not right and now I know how destructive I was (and is). It’s sort of a relief to figure this out but very scary as I dont really know what to do now and dont want to fall back in to that pattern. I have lived a double life as my parents and family does not know what I have been up to, so in a way it’s a saving grace as they where not affected. But that also made me think, if I was living a good clean life, I did not have to lead a double life as there would be nothing to be ashamed of, it all would be so much easier, wouldnt it
My questions, does binge drinkers have to stop drinking totally? Is binge drinking Alcoholism? Can you over come binge drinking by yourself (and help of friends). Please help me solve this problem of mine. Thanks
Hi,
Like many people have said, reading these stories is all to familier.
I started drinking at 23 after a bad period in my life, never everyday but to “pick my self up”. From there it turned to heavy drinking on nights out, to bottles of wine at home, to many bottles and whole weekends lost..
I’m now 32, can go without a drink for a week, can even control drinking for a few weeks, then boom, i lose it…. once i get through a few drinks i cannot stop.
I have done so many bad things, lost a few very good friends but i never seem to learn.. My BF also says i’m a time bomb, he never knows when it will happen.. (i am now on my last and final chance with him)
I hate hurting the people around me, I hate myself for what i am doing.. I would love to stop but i just don’t seem to be able to..
My dad was an alcoholic and died an alcoholic.. although i new new him.
So here I am, trying once again, like i’m sure thousands are at this moment in time..
Its nice to know i’m not alone in this problem because being the only person in my circle to have this problem i can feel such a freak at times..
I wish i could find something that would help….
If your success is not on your own terms, if it looks good to the world but does not feel good in your heart, it is not success at all.
Ref:Rachel
I was quite motivated by this person’s reference to not being alone with this binge drinking phenomenon which is something I too have commented on before,the only thing is, it is not down to thousands of people surely but heck of a lot more.
I often compared my excessive nights out to the same as not smoking for a couple of weeks and really not being too fussed by that but then once a cigarette is smoked then my ability to not smoke goes out of the window and I want another cigarette, or rather I have to have another cigarette and we all know without any denial that this is because cigarettes are so bloody addictive but the exact same thing happens when I drink as once I pop a beer,I just want another and another and another so there has to be an underlying reason for the same compulsive behaviour as smoking and it must boil down to the addictive qualities of alcohol.Its difficult to see the addictive nature of the drug drink because we are all mostly deluded that alcohol addiction is only when someone wakes up the morning and gets straight on it.
Whether cigarette addiction creates the non-stop mechanism within some people is hugely suspected by myself as there is so much personal experience to say this is true,or possible.
The fact of the matter is whether you like it, or not, is that in this world especialy in the Western world are governments that openly condone the licencing of establishments and huge organisations to sell and distribute what is effectively an addictive drug and it is because of this addictive drug that there are people addicted to it and whether that would be a chronic physically dependant alcoholic or someone who binge drinks is totally irrelevant.
Just because there are pubs and shops and hotels and clubs that sell addictive drugs openly and as if it is just the same as selling cabbages and bread when all along we all know that it is still an addictive drug being supplied like candy to school kids,………………………………………………………………………………so before anyone else puts themselves through the personal agony of why they have been unable to control their consumption of a few drinks(an immensely toxic and addictive substance,namely a hardcore addictive drug) please understand that just because it is out there in society does not mean it is right, as you can not ever determine the state of a societies mental health when the society is insane.
Everybody including myself is beating themselves up as to why they are having this problem with a drug,yes a drug and the fact of the matter is it is because it is a very addictive and dangerous drug and we have to ask ourselves why such a powerful drug is so openly available anyway,I mean why not have crack bars and trendy crystal meth corner shops.Just because it is there it does not make it right.
I would not of had a problem with alcohol if it was not there in the first place,why in heavens name is it there?
What could possibly be normal or sane about premises selling huge quantities of an incredibly addictive drug?
On a larger picture it is just an enormous taxation and opportunity to control people and that is not a conspiracy it is a fact,we all here on this site who have posted are evidence of it.
If it was not alcohol it would be another drug and we would all be sitting here beating ourselves up about why other people seem to be able to go out and smoke a couple of cigarettes at the local licensed premises or have a couple of opium pipes and others just cant stop…well let me spell it out one last time!!!!!It is an addictive drug which means that at some point whether early on or late in life you are going to lose control of your consumption rate simply because it is an addictive substance.
Stay out of the bars as they are not what they appear,they are drug suppliers.Do not buy alcohol,it IS a drug and somewhere along the lines of human history man determined that consumption and supply of life destroying substances as available as buying stamps of a loaf of bread was acceptable….it is not!It is the production and distribution of a deadly, addictive and poisonous drug.
My regards to all those who read this and continue to think it is more and that drinkers with problems are weak and that they are pathetic…no that is not true!!! a problem drinker is a human being who has been exposed to an addictive substance and has developed problems due to association with the substance.
How can society determine alcoholics are weak,pathetic and have a disease when they are existing in a society that openly pumps out addictive substances under the guise that it is totally normal.
Its not normal,how can it be?What could possibly be justified by supplying society a poison.
Probably no surprise but maybe, just maybe it is time to give up drinking and get rid off all the establishments in towns and villages and cities that supply an addictive substance.
Goodbye alcohol!….hello to a new slant on life and maybe the possibility of a safer,happier and saner society where it is not okay to be exposed by third parties to addictive substances,we all want the drug dealers out so why kick out all the drugs and leave the biggest and richest and most powerful drug suppliers in there licensed premises.
A drug is a drug,that is the bottom line!
I personally think that for someone like myself who has repeatedly gone back to binge drinking (even though it has caused consequences from my worst nightmares from embarressment to getting bust for drink driving),one of the major misunderstandings of what I have been doing is down to the fact that one must have actually been addicted to alcohol and at the same time been completely unaware of this.
The reason for being unaware is because one would never wake up in the morning and want a drink and that is what alcoholics do right?well obviously some do and some dont,as I know realise.
I would wake up after a heavy session and feel so awful that I would not want to go near a pub for days afterwards but then once I was feeling good again, it would pop into my head that a good session would be good fun and off it all goes again and has done for 22 years.
I never recognised this as addiction but it is only over the past few years that I have realsied that it has to be addiction and I only discovered this by giving up cigarettes (also more times that I can remember).One can stop smoking and ok yes,one would feel bloody awful for a good few days until your body detoxified from tobacco but the point is you would reach a level eventually where you felt comfortable no longer smoking and this could go on for some time however,when that first cigarette does get smoked again then suddenly the urge to smoke more cigarettes just gets restarted and off it all goes again and a person finds himself smoking cigarette after cigarette even when they dont want to as they are addicted again,you see.
Now the same phenomenon applies to binge drinking except everytime you have another drink unfortunately you are getting more and more out of control mentally as you are getting drunk but the same thing is going on here as it is with the cigarettes.You are consuming a drug which your body must have some level of addiction to and on re-consuming it again all the unstoppable cravings and consumption start up again.
The scarey bit about what I have described here is that if alcoholic drinks did not get people drunk then I personally suspect that the phenomena of binge drinking would still continue even though people were not getting legless and I believe this because alcohol is obviously very addictive in many different ways.
Food for thought?……..makes sense to me!
I’m a 31 year old female. I started binge drinking when I was 13 years old – the summer after my father died. Throughout the years, I’ve gone binge drinking over a hundred times. Most times I black out and am told about the evenings events from friends.
Some horrible incidents include jumping out of a second-floor window, waking up in a hotel room with blood in my underwear, and being escorted out of a family-style function by security.
Believe it or not, I have a masters degree, a secure job, a wonderful boyfriend (doesn’t drink), and a reliable (albeit dysfunctional) family.
I go for months on end without drinking (most recently, 6 months) and then decide I want to “party” and overdo it. My friends actually encourage my drinking because I do crazy things.
Last weekend, I got wasted at my job’s holiday party. My co-workers ended up having to take care of me as I was incoherent and belligerent. So horrible.
Is this alcoholism?? If so, what do I do? I need advice as I feel terrible guilt and shame at my behavior. Thank you.
I am a 21yo guy who has been binge drinking for some time now (about 6 years) the problem is i cannot stop drinking once i start until i pass out, I have recently lost a few friends due to me getting in a state and verbally abusing them for no reason, i hate the fact that i can’t handle my drink but i can go without it for weeks at a time if needed. My social life is a big part of my life and im worried i will end up with no friends if i keep up my drinking but i may lose them if i give it up as i hate going out sober and i need a drink for confidence. I do think i have a problem as i just don’t know my limits but as said once i start i can’t stop. i don’t want to talk to my family or friends about it but i know i need help. I also said to one of my friends my only solution is to stop drinking and they said know its not….if everyone else can have a good time without getting that drunk why can’t you……why can’t i? i just don’t know when to stop. what should i do?
Reference Andrew.
Your friend says that as everyone else can stop then so should you be able to…well what the hell does he /she know?……what about the person who cant stop smoking?the person who cant stop gambling?the person who cant stop stealing?the person who cant stop eating?the person who cant stop hurting themselvesf?the person who cant stop taking drugs?…..you get the idea?
The point I am trying to make here is when he says everyone else can stop he is actually trying to pass false information on to you because I cant stop and nor can an absolutely huge portion of the world’s population so who is he talking about? cause it aint everyone else that I know.
From reading all these posts, I’d say that anyone who finds a website to check to see if they are drinking too much is an alcoholic.
So many familiar sounding posts here. I thank each and every one of you for writing them b/c they helped me realize that I am not alone and I now understand what this problem is a lot better.
I am 31 and have been binge drinking since I was 18 or 19. There is a solid history of alcohol abuse in my family. For a year or two in my mid 20’s I was drinking 4 or 5 times a week, but mostly due to the death of my mother from cancer/general fuck the world/don’t care anymore. All other times, I drink once every week or two weeks on average but I go all out when I do.
Somebody mentioned terrible hangovers with a whole host of symptoms from heart palpitations to insomnia to terrible guilt. Yes to all. And they last for 2 or 3 days, not just 1.
I remember being 19 and I could drink all night and wake up totally fine the next day. Oh how things change. My drinking has become less frequent in recent years. I would say once every 2 or 3 weeks on average and I regularly go whole months (and I count every week.)
During the time between drinking bouts I regularly tell myself how great it feels to have gotten thru another weekend, look at all the money I still have etc.
But the inevitable twitch in my brain comes and I just decide (against all my reasoning abilities. Its like I ignore my rational side completely) that I am going to drink that night. I get obliterated every time and the cycle just continues on.
There were some cigarette theories above. I quit smoking on Jan 1, 2010 (6 weeks ago) and have drank 3 times since then. I was a bit concerned about wanting a cig while drinking but I have been very confident in my quit and I made it through all 3 times without too much of an issue. However, I drank just as much each time and it still had the same enormously negative impact on my life.
Tinkerbell asked this:
“My questions, does binge drinkers have to stop drinking totally? Is binge drinking Alcoholism? Can you over come binge drinking by yourself (and help of friends). Please help me solve this problem of mine. Thanks”
I believe the only answer is to quit completely. That is not the answer any of us wants to here. I know I almost cherish that getting bombed every once in awhile…like I deserve it or something. And have these thoughts from time to time that life just won’t be as fun if I stop drinking. These thoughts occur only just prior and during the drinking. In hindsight I regret drinking every single time.
And trying to “control” the drinking doesn’t work either. I can count on one hand how many times in the past 12 years that I have drank in moderation (a couple drinks). I have planned on just having a couple drinks many times. But 6 is just getting started…10 and were getting the party going and 12-16 to make it a great night.
The reason we cannot control the amount we drink is b/c binge drinking is a form of alcoholism. I know it affects my life in very negative way and the only option for me is to quit completely. I have done 6 months before without AA or any support group. I think it just comes down to planning ahead and being clear on your goals and sticking to them no matter what. And it always gets easier the longer you go.
Find something else to do for a few months instead of going to that bar or party. You will be much better prepared to deal with it when you haven’t had a drink in a few months. Buy stuff like cans of Nestea (iced tea). Most people at the party will just think its a can of beer anyways.
I wish you all luck.
Hi all,
I just want to thank you all. I identify so much with all ye have said. I am a binge drinker since i was 18 (35 now) and i am so so so tired of repeating the same old mistakes over and over. The big paradox with me is, i am a real healthy eater etc and i exercise and like to feel good but maybe once a week or twice a month i will just go to a bar and drink pints like there is no tomorrow and i will chain smoke (i don’t smoke, only when i drink) and then the next day i feel the effects, sometimes my body can sometimes feel very strange (like the onset of a stroke or something) this all added into the guilt. Then it takes me a few days to get back to feeling good physically and mentally again. Anyway to make a long story short, i need to stop, as with me it is all or nothing. I quit for 2 years when i was 24-26 and it was the best thing i ever did as when i really think about it, the majority of the pain in my life has being caused by alcohol. My advice to people who cannot see a way out – you can do it, and you are not alone.
I’ll keep this breif for the first time in my life i decided to look into how I drink like I do. I am and have been for a long time a binge drinker I dont drink Sunday thru Thursday night ever as I have to work. But come Friday night I down a 30 pack, blackout, passout, and on more than several occasions drive hammered. I’ve thought for a long time now that what I was doing was wrong but I can’t stop myself from doing it. I’m 23 years old now been doing the same thing for 7 years maybe longer. I’ve woken up in the wrong house with a gun in my face, woken up at home with my face beat in and have no idea what happened. At least im not alone good to see people are in the same boat. Maybe its time to call it quits on the drinking before I hurt myself, or more importantly someone else.
It’s good to read all these stories as it feels almost like looking in a mirror. I binge drink seriously badly about once every 3 months, I can feel it creeping up on me, I know it’s coming. Most recently I had passed the 3 month since the last bad one and thought I had got past it but oops saturday came along and there I was curled up in the street with my husband pleading with me to get up. Eventually he got me home and cleared up my vomit, my children saw me the next day looking like death with bits of sicked up food stuck in my hair.
I come from a family who all drink, my dad to excess but others just happily keep it to moderation. I can’t imagine not having wine as part of my life, we did 3 weeks at the beginning of January and it was great but we just slipped back into it cos its just part of the way everyone I know lives. Having read the messages above I think maybe I should just stop altogether I’m sure the longer you go that way the easier it would be and all those around you will just accept that that is what you have decided.
One thing noone seems to have mentioned is that there must be an underlyng reason behind wanting to go out and get totally wasted. I have issues in my life which I find hard to see a way out of but I think if you can work out the underlying reason why you want to get off your face – it is an escape of sorts isnt it – then you can move on. Work out what the problem is then you can work out a solution, little steps and all that.
It’s great I found this site, makes you feel less of an idiot when you know there are so many of you!! x
Hi everyone, wow your stories really bring a level of respect. What you are dealing with is so difficult, and I wish you all the best. Im on here because I’ve been looking for a few days on information to help me with my fiance. He is the nicest guy in the world sober, but one drink and he can’t stop. And then he takes all his frusteration out on me. I grew up with an alcoholic father, and never in a million years I’d be here again. I want to help him, but Im only now really seeing he has a problem. He can go weeks without drinking, and then he has one night of drinking, and goes on drinking for a few days afterwards. I read about the binge drinking and was shocked to find I recogize this in him. I feel like im the last person who should help him right now, simply because Im so angry, I know that sounds terrible, but almost two years of being called terrible names, telling me everything is my fault tears at the heart of someone. But I want to help, I just feel all alone, and find it hard to talk to him because even sober he refuses to talk about it. We just go on like everything is ok, and Im dying inside too. I love him and want to help him, and I want to do the right thing only Im so lost as to what to do. Any advise out there, I want to learn and be a support and help him. I know he has to want to help himself, but it kills me to see him like this. Thanks, and good luck, you all seem so strong to me!!!
that sucks
Why i came to this site i dont know, but GumboC said it best that if were on this site we must have some sort of problem im 20 now and have been binge drinking since i was 13. Ive been in numerous amounts of trouble from suspensions expulsions jail time recently a dui i couldnt hold a serious relationship all through highschool because 2/7 days a week i was drunken mess. I was always the one getting too drunk at partys waking up with blackeyes or a bucket next 2 my bed because i came home beligerent. I got kicked out of my dorms my first semester of college due to my drinking. i feel lately ive been able 2 not become the drunken clown i do besides a few occasions but recently got a dui and blew a .21 when i want to controll how much i drink i can but theres some nights i dont give a shit and become my worst enemy is their anyone who has learned to simply controll getting belligrent i feel like it possible but also fell very young and niave. Legally i cant drink and ive had problems with alchoal for over 6 years any body have simular thoughts
hi everyone, i have been drinking since i was 24. i had it under control in the early years of drinking.as i got older i became a binge drinker.I can go three months without a drink, then bingo.the last couple of binges have been scary. i went out during a blizard.The fireman picked me of the street.There as another time i came home in my underwear.i have been going to meeting. i want to leave the alcohol behind
My heart is breaking as this all sounds so familiar. My marriage broke apart because of something that seems so small- having a few too many every once in a while-otherwise known a s binge drinking. My husband had a great job, he worked very hard around the house, and was an excellent dad. But every few months, we’d go out to socialize and 2 hours in, he’d be totally wasted, despite my constant little whispers to “slow it down”. Finding the time, money and energy to go out was hard enough with a new baby, but it became a HUGE HASSLE for me because the night always ended with him completely beligerent, incoherent, or worse. Sometimes he’d either try to or successfully get the keys and drive (WASTED!!!!!) or he’d start fights, punch walls, cause himself to fall and get hurt. It’s a miracle he hasn’t been arrested yet. But obviously, this behaviour, although as infrequent as every few months or so, was often enough to really put our family and everything we’d worked for in jeopardy, SO, I finally divorced him and took our son with me. The saddest part about the whole thing is the irony that someone so near perfect in the realm of husband, father, work ethic, etc. could get it SOOOOOO wrong when it came to going out or even staying in and having a good time with his wife and in a group of friends without potentially ruining our lives or killing himself or someone else in his alcoholic stupor. It happens every few months or so, and seems like such a small thing in comparison to every other aspect of him as a person. but just like a cancer cell, it invades, infects and destroys everything else around it, good or not. What a waste. It could have been great for us.
All of these stories sound all to familiar to me as well. I have had a binge drinking problem pretty much since I first started drinking at the age of 13/14. I think my first time drinking was when I was in like 6th grade age 11. Went through a bunch of crazy things in high school. When I was 15 I flipped my SUV in my neighborhood. Got in fights. Lost friends. Drove wasted all the time even after flipping my SUV. 18-21 Went to jail after major blackout at parents house from going crazy throwing myself down a flight of stairs. For a time around 21 I kinda quit drinking, but soon the strong urge to drink came back and then a whole host of other issues came up. DUI at age 23 one mile from my house. I remember one time when I was 25 and just lost my job I went on like a 3 day bender and remember calling my dad on my cell phone and totally cussed him out for no reason. Punched my glass table and cut up my hand…walked to a Doctor’s office and got stiched up all while insanely drunk. Now at age 27 I have been downing an 18 pack if not more once a week. I can drink a lot of beer. Horrible. Wake up feeling like hell. Say to myself I am not drinking again. Then a week later I do it again. Since about age 25 I have not really had any horrible episodes no violent outbreaks and no run ins with the law. Thank god! I would love to give it up completely but I feel like I will not have a social life. Actually I don’t even like bars though…thats another thing is that I love and do driInk alone and jam out to music. Crazy I know. It just kinda relaxes me and allows my mind to be free for that small window of time…then wake up and boom hangover time…My hangovers can last days to. It is insane. Dry mouth, dehydration, headache, weak, tired but cant sleep, insomnia, guilt, shame, cant get enough water, sore muscles, clinched teeth, ect. Hangovers should be the thing that gets me to quit. I hate it so much. But yet I still get tore up from the floor up and down like 18-24 beers in one sitting. I am an alcoholic for sure. It sucks and I have no control once I start with that first drink. It also kills my self esteem. Can’t get any girls b/c of this huge problem…low confidence without the drink in me. Liquid courage they say but is it worth it in the end….HELL NO!!!! I am going to try and go on a sober streak starting tonight. Goodnight to all and good luck with the booze demons that may haughnt your soul!!!!
GumboC’s post probably doesnt apply to you. You seem to be more concerned about software compatibility;))